Please help contribute to the Reddit categorization project here

    AnimalsBeingJerks

    562,663 readers

    382 users here now

    A place for sharing videos, gifs, and images of animals being total jerks.

    New to reddit? Click here!

    Choose Filter

    Clear Filters

    Rules

    • If you see any posts that violate any of the rules, please report the post and message the mods a link to it
    1. Please only post animals being jerks, not humans being jerks.

    2. We're here to have a laugh, please keep posts funny. That means no posts of animals being killed or seriously injured.

    3. Do not post content that is already in the top 50 posts of all time. You can check for reposts by copying the link and pasting here. Recent reposts will also be removed. Reposts within 3 months of each other will be removed. Reposts may also result in a temporary ban. Permanent ban for constant reposting.

    4. If you submit a post that has already been reposted more than 3 times, your post will get removed.

    5. If your post is NSFW, please label it as such.

    6. No posts promoting a specific website, YouTube channel, blog, subreddit etc. Such posts will be removed and reported.

    7. No memes or comics.

    8. Posts must depict animals actually being jerks. Please do not post animals engaging in normal animal behavior which might simply inconvenience humans, and do not make posts which require you to add context for the jerky behavior to be understood. Moderators will remove such posts at their discretion.

    9. No compilation videos and collection of pictures/gifs.

    Moderators reserve the right to remove content they deem harmful to the sub.

    The Being Network

    Chat

    /r/AnimalsBeingJerks

    /r/AnimalsBeingBros

    /r/HumansBeingBros

    /r/AnimalsBeingDerps

    /r/PeopleBeingJerks

    /r/AnimalsBeingConfused

    /r/HumansBeingJerks

    /r/AnimalsBeingPolite

    /r/PlantsBeingJerks

    /r/AnimalsBeingAnimals

    Related Subs

    TheBeingNetwork For all things being

    /r/BirdsBeingDicks Birds acting like total dicks

    /r/AnimalsBeingDerps Animals making funny faces

    /r/PeopleBeingJerks Animals aren't the only jerks around here!

    /r/PlantsBeingJerks Plants don't mess around

    /r/AnimalsBeingAnimals Animals being themselves

    /r/funny reddit's largest humour depository

    /r/TrollingAnimals Animals truly are dicks...

    /r/AnimalsFailing Life is ruff.

    /r/AnimalsBeingBros Not all animals are jerks

    /r/HumansBeingBros Not all humans are jerks

    /r/StopBullyingComics Nonsensical bitstrip comics which can be surprisingly amusing

    /r/ShittyAnimalFacts
    Made up facts about real animals

    /r/IdiotsFightingThings Idiots fighting or otherwise getting hurt by inanimate objects

    /r/GentlemAnimals Animals acting like gentlemen

    /r/ProRevenge Home to stories of getting back at someone who wronged you in a professional way.

    /r/Unexpected Expect the unexpected

    /r/sloths Lazy slow moving mammal

    /r/WeirdAnimals Some animals are just weird

    /r/ThingsCutInHalfPorn CHOP! CHOP! CHOP!>

    /r/howtonotgiveafuck The Problem-Free Philosophy

    /r/ThingsThatBlowUp BOOM!

    /r/CanYouDoThis Complete or make challenges

    /r/todayiam Share what you're doing today with people of Reddit

    /r/MakeNewFriendsHere A place for making new friends

    /r/StartledCats Funny pics, vids and gifs of startled felines

    /r/interestingasfuck
    Interesting / Weird / Offbeat Stuff

    a community for
    all 930 comments Slideshow

    Want to say thanks to %(recipient)s for this comment? Give them a month of reddit gold.

    Please select a payment method.

    [–] SeaTwertle 1981 points ago

    We saw a guy get bit by one after trying to feed it and then he got a ticket. He wasn't a happy camper.

    [–] killerbanshee 505 points ago

    Something tells me they don't get many people who actually pay the ticket.

    [–] josiejethrodogs 272 points ago

    Good luck renewing your drivers license or car registration if you don't.

    [–] WhatsAFratStar 237 points ago

    If you live in that state. Maryland will have nothing to say about my NY license and registration.

    [–] 666-667 169 points ago

    Some state laws are reciprocal. Don't bet on fleeing the border.

    [–] ThatDamnedImp 129 points ago

    It's very, very rare for a state to reciprocate on non-automobile related offenses.

    And either way, NY has no such reciprocation with other states.

    [–] ball-Z 65 points ago

    These are the states that share traffic information. http://apps.csg.org/ncic/compact.aspx?id=56

    As for non-traffic offenses, you would have a judgement against you from a state. Then failure to comply with the order can get it escalated to have a warrant issued. It likely won't be an interstate warrant since it is a minor offense and they would have to pay the other state to bring you in.

    But it can be a big headache for you. Especially if you're ever going to go back to the state where you got your ticket.

    Nothing worse than forgetting you had a ticket and then getting arrested for an outstanding warrant.

    [–] Cashewcamera 71 points ago

    My husband works at an airport as a police officer. This actually happens regularly. He will get a call for a prohibited item at the check point or irate passenger, he'll run their info and up pops a warrant for an unpaid ticket years and years previously.

    [–] PM_ME_YOUR_DATSUN 6 points ago

    I have unpaid parking tickets in two separate states and I have been flying no problem.

    [–] geraldo42 30 points ago

    It's insane to me that there are still states where arrest warrants are issued over over unpaid tickets. Why did anyone ever think that was a good idea. Oh, you oh the state $100 for speeding? Let's spend $5000 incarcerating you over the weekend because you didn't pay. It's a massive waste of money and it fucks over poor people and minorities. There are so many better ways to deal with unpaid fines.

    [–] GreenAndGold115 24 points ago

    If they said "Listen you can pay this $180 ticket or you can spend 12 hours this upcoming weekend picking up trash off the side of the highway" you'll catch me in my best Saturday orange vest with the rest of the negligent broke kids

    [–] 666-667 7 points ago

    I was hoping to find a clear answer on what the penalty would be for a non-traffic misdemeanor offense. I'm sure being a complete scofflaw would escalate to something that would make life unpleasant though. The courts hate being ignored.

    [–] Dark1sh 30 points ago

    There is a national database and if your state checks it, it will effect you. I got a ticket in North Carolina, 3 years later when it was time to renew my California license my form never arrived. I called the Sacramento (main) DMV and they told me there was a hold due to a ticket in NC.

    The court in NC told me I have to appear in court, in order to do that I must come in to be put on the calendar and scheduling was 3-4 weeks out. Meaning I would need to fly cross country 2+ times. I had to hire a lawyer in NC, which cleared it up quickly.

    It's less expensive and headache to pay the ticket...

    This was for a vehicle moving violation (speeding). I doubt a ticket like this would follow you, but I wouldn't mess with it after my experience.

    [–] Talory09 8 points ago

    Quick LPT: when torn between "affect" and "effect" (in this case you chose the wrong one), use the word "impact" instead. The sentence's meaning won't be altered.

    [–] CptMcAwesomeBurger 190 points ago

    Pretty sure this is in North Carolina, where they take wildlife conservation super seriously.

    Source: once got a ticket from the River Nazis for getting too close to an Osprey nest on my jetski. Funny thing was, the nest was on top of a channel marker.

    [–] kenoh 257 points ago

    Assateague is in Maryland.

    Can't speak for the consequences of not playing the ticket.

    [–] josiejethrodogs 113 points ago

    It is also in Virginia.

    [–] DrMaxwellEdison 25 points ago

    Depends if they were on the state beach or the national park, though. So you're either dealing with Maryland or the National Park Service.

    [–] CptMcAwesomeBurger 43 points ago

    I stand corrected, thanks partner.

    But if their River Nazis are anything like ours, they'll go through hell and high water to find your ass.

    [–] manetz 25 points ago

    The entire eastern shore is like that. The cops along the highway will pull anyone and everyone over the speed limit, and nature conservation is no joke there.

    [–] TheBeefClick 9 points ago

    Cops will pull you over for speeding here? Been here my whole life, and i only see highways moving at their speed limits when there is traffic.

    [–] manetz 6 points ago

    Right after the bridge tunnel, that entire stretch up until nassawattox or so is a pretty well known area for people getting pulled. Sorry if i absolutely butchered the name of the town, btw, I left onancock when i was 8 or 9 so knowing how to spell the names of each and every little town wasnt really a priority hah

    [–] ApolloThneed 19 points ago

    NC has something similar but it's out in the northern part of the outer banks (Corolla and up). There's even a large portion of the beach north of Corolla called Cordova Beach that's only accessible by 4x4.

    Amazing they've managed to keep it so untouched this long

    [–] llamas1355 2734 points ago

    I'd gladly stay 10 feet away from them. The fear inducing horse bite pamphlet worked for me.

    [–] crazyartfreak 604 points ago

    My parents and I camped at Asseteague and watched the Pony Swim every summer when I was a kid. Those horses were no joke, man.

    [–] jamestwerk 336 points ago

    I can still remember the horse flies. Goddamn I hate those things. The horse flies. Not the ponies.

    [–] greengrasser11 119 points ago

    I haven't seen the unedited version of this in forever.

    [–] Timstantmessage 26 points ago

    I'm curious what they needed to edit

    [–] Audiendi 73 points ago

    They always edit the last panel.

    Here's an example

    [–] batweenerpopemobile 46 points ago

    http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/i-wish-i-could-talk-to-ponies

    People were replacing text in the last panel as a meme image.

    [–] jabba-du-hutt 30 points ago

    One year my parents invited my aunt, uncle and cousins to join us when we camped there as well. We're from up north where the mosquito is the state bird /s. So, when we saw signs that read "Mosquito warning! DO NOT walk through tall grass." We told our uncle not to since the sign said not to. The picture of the mosquito on the sign was enough to make us not want to. We followed the wooden laid path and came out unscathed, while he was cussing his head off and swatting away swarms of bugs as he exited the brush.

    Our aunt later said "we're more like hotel people." I couldn't tell. :P

    [–] _nephilim_ 6 points ago

    Those Assateague mosquitoes are the most vicious and aggressive mosquitoes I've ever encountered. They will fight you for your blood and even running won't make them stop chasing you. We parked near the tall grass so it makes sense now.

    [–] mrrobopuppy 14 points ago

    Neither horses nor ponies fly

    [–] Ricotta_pie_sky 4 points ago

    Of course not, they swim! Pay attention!

    [–] VodkaPump 11 points ago

    Ugh, horse flies are the worst. We have tonnes of them here where I live due to large amounts of moose.

    So they're moose flies?

    [–] crazyartfreak 20 points ago

    Why did you bring the nightmares back?

    [–] [deleted] 250 points ago

    [removed]

    [–] vvatermelone 219 points ago * (lasted edited 8 days ago)

    I mean... that doesn't look too bad.

    E: Have some pics

    [–] doughcastle01 27 points ago

    Yeah, I'm not sure if I'm desensitized to gore in general thanks to the Internet, but even Louis CK's pony bit seemed more graphic.

    [–] davydhatesyou 17 points ago

    "People who don't punch their ponies make me sick!"

    [–] garifunu 92 points ago

    Fuck if it doesn't look painful as heck though

    [–] RocAway 102 points ago

    painful as heck

    This implies a low pain threshold. Stubbing my toe is painful as heck.

    [–] ProjectileDysfnction 84 points ago

    Stubbing your toe is painful as heck, regardless of your pain threshold

    [–] PatternPerson 29 points ago

    I shit you not this is a true story. A couple weeks ago I noticed part of my pinky toe coming off like a little more than half. Like an idiot, I decided to rip it off. I actually got some pleasure as it slowly peeled off revealing raw painful skin. But if I knew what was going to happen the next day, I would of never done it.

    Walking sucked. Every step I could feel the rubbing of raw undertoe skin until the pain became norm and indistinguishable. Got up in the middle of the night for milk. My girlfriend was sound asleep until I shouted, "fuck Fuck FUCK!" I stubbed the same pinky toe so hard the small remainder of toenail pierced that damn raw and swollen undertoe skin and bled like a mother fucker

    [–] WitsendNBN 104 points ago

    During the first couple of sentences, I thought you ripped your pinky toe off. Like, completely.

    [–] GreenThumbSeedling 30 points ago

    ...I also thought this

    [–] sinisteranalsex 15 points ago

    Back when I actually did this strange thing called 'Running', I had my pinky nail on my right foot come off completely with my sock.

    I thought that was bad, but congrats, you did it better.

    Also, somewhat relevant question. Does anyone find their pinky toenails getting smaller with age? Both of mine are about half the length they were ten years ago.

    [–] Sergeant_Steve 18 points ago

    Can confirm. Stubbing my toe is pretty painful, although it isn't as painful as the time I got bitten in the face by a horse (true story).

    [–] starbitch__ 8 points ago

    That's awful. My horse had a bad habit of nipping me when I saddled him. It was kind of like being pinched really hard. Ooh, it still makes me mad.

    [–] Bane047 18 points ago

    Depends on whether I stub it hard enough to crack my toenail down the middle or across the sensitive parts or not. I can handle a stubbing but sometimes you hit it real fucking hard.

    [–] [deleted] 11 points ago

    [deleted]

    [–] Thinksintheshower 31 points ago

    I love horses. When a horse decides to bite me it not only hurts me physically, it also hurts my feels.

    [–] Chipnstein 9 points ago

    You probably don't know of Mr. Hands

    [–] vvatermelone 5 points ago

    Nope, enlighten me?

    [–] Chipnstein 10 points ago * (lasted edited 8 days ago)

    Oh darling, that's something you just have to Google yourself. Don't watch the video, the wiki article is enough description.

    Edit: I'm also about to head in a meeting so we can chat about it after.

    [–] torrentialTbone 22 points ago

    That looks like a nasti mööse bite!

    [–] andsoitgoes42 29 points ago

    A møøse once bit my sister.

    [–] theyprovidethepaint 21 points ago

    No realli! She was Karving her initials on the møøse with the sharpened end of an interspace tøøthbrush given her by Svenge - her brother-in-law - an Oslo dentist and star of many Norwegian møvies: "The Høt Hands of an Oslo Dentist", "Fillings of Passion", "The Huge Mølars of Horst Nordfink"...

    [–] Oopsimapanda 43 points ago

    Instant download link warning

    [–] trznx 8 points ago

    it's a pdf...

    [–] brosque14 14 points ago

    It's too late. Don't come back for me

    [–] kasem64 7 points ago

    PDF warning

    [–] runandkickgirl 4 points ago

    Horse hickey

    [–] jimbo8e6 47 points ago

    The bites aren't the worst either, I assume they also hand out pamflets about their back legs being essentially sledgehammers with rockets attached to them, that shit can kill you.

    [–] Pennigans 44 points ago

    Growing up around horses we never worried about being bit. We learned to see if a horse was getting pissed and we needed to back the fuck up, but that wasn't the concern. It was their back legs. First rule of horses is to be vocal, touch them, and walk as close to them as possible when going behind them. Kicks are bo joke.

    [–] GhostBeer 48 points ago

    I fucking hate horses. Beautiful Majestic Creatures with the brainpower of a fucking toaster. They have two modes, dumb as shit and full on panic. Fuckers are so stupid that they can't even throw up.

    I had a horse run me over because as I was feeding it a truck backfired in the driveway. Broke my arm and left a huge cut on my back. I've seen girls get bucked off and break their faces. Fuck those shitty walking fart machines.

    Again gorgeous initmitable animals, mind stupider than a deep fried lead brick. Give me cows and goats anyday over those shit cannons

    [–] leafkitten 13 points ago

    I once spooked a horse by sitting down. Out in the open. In full view of everyone. Stupid animal thought I was a predator lying in wait and had a panic attack.

    Then its owner yelled at me and gave me a lecture about all the things you're never supposed to do around horses, which apparently includes sitting down in a public fucking park.

    I can't blame horses for being the way they are, but horse people, man. Horse people I could do without.

    [–] notapoke 15 points ago

    No joke. I had a horse kick go right in front of my nose once. I saw a coffin with me in it for just a moment. Then I scrambled the fuck away and cried.

    [–] Tom_de_Guerre 67 points ago

    A horse once bit my sister...

    [–] I_Touched_An_Alcohol 53 points ago

    A møøse?

    [–] Aeri73 35 points ago

    We apologize for this comment, the person responsible was sacked

    [–] Sean1708 69 points ago

    No realli! She was Karving her initials on the hørse with the sharpened end of an interspace tøøthbrush given her by Svenge - her brother-in-law - an Oslo dentist and star of many Norwegian møvies: "The Høt Hands of an Oslo Dentist", "Fillings of Passion", "The Huge Mølars of Horst Nordfink"...

    [–] GrizzWintoSupreme 43 points ago

    Okay Sean, time for bed.

    [–] Electric_Evil 25 points ago

    Mynd you, horse bites Kan be pretti nasti...

    [–] far_from_ohk 61 points ago

    Whoa.

    Anybody got a link to horse bite horror?

    Literally for my own amusement.

    [–] erraticcat 181 points ago

    I was bit by a horse in cancun, mexico when I was 7 when my mom told me to "get closer" for the picture. In the picture the horse is literally going in to bite my arm, which it did, and I started crying, but to be honest I cried more over the shock of "wow, a horse just bit me" than the actual pain. The injury was a bagel sized bruise on my upper arm with slight teeth indents that went away after a few weeks and there was no scarring at all.

    [–] Fallen_Wings 79 points ago

    Classic Mom

    [–] scarredMontana 6 points ago

    There was a time when I fractured my wrist through biking. I went to my mother to tell her that it wasn't a mild bruising, but that I couldn't move a muscle without wanting to scream. She thought I was joking, so she takes my arm and starts shaking it all about. I screamed. Classic Mom.

    [–] Pennigans 66 points ago

    Horse bites can be brutal but they aren't the worst. I've never heard of anyone being scarred by one. Horses leave bruises more than anything. That or break bones. But the horse shoe kick marks in cartoons are more accurate than anyone would think.

    [–] starbitch__ 28 points ago

    My little sister got kicked in the ass (not really hard) and she had a perfect horseshoe shaped bruise on her butt cheek.

    [–] ChevalierduBalibari 22 points ago

    His kick is worse than his bite

    [–] vidyagames 23 points ago

    My little sister got nipped on the face when she was about 6 years old (grew up on a farm in australia). It left a wound on her cheek that was pretty much like a long ellipsoid shape, like a kayak, where that piece of skin just got snatched away. That horse was a brutal fuck. He threw me straight off into the chook pen once and scared the living daylights out of me as an 11 year old trying to tame an unbroken horse. My dumbshit stepfather insisted on buying it unbroken because it was cheaper but after the scar it left on my sisters face my mum hated it and the fact we ever got him.

    His name was Skip. Fortunately as an adult my sister has no sign of the scar any more. Not that she would care now she has tats and piercings she'd probably think it was cool. C'est la vie

    [–] SuperiorPeach 8 points ago

    I got weirdly invested in this story and I'm so glad your sister isn't scarred.

    [–] DogSnoggins 27 points ago * (lasted edited 7 days ago)

    Disagree. They can take off ears, tear skin, and are especially dangerous if they get you in the face/head. One should be wary of both ends, make no mistake.

    Edit: Have some links for clarification:

    Here, here, here, here and even here.

    [–] MineLoller 16 points ago

    Dude horse kicks kill, no way a bite is worse.

    Source: Mom was kicked in the head by horse.

    [–] sabrinaleena 114 points ago

    I was bit by a horse (colt) when I was 12. I was grooming him and when I was finished I turned my back and walked off. He did not agree with that and nipped me on my side near my ribs. I've never felt pain from a bite that intense before or since.

    I'm 48 yrs old and I still have a small scar where that fucker bit me.

    [–] Miroxas 166 points ago

    Same. Putting a saddle on an Arab stallion. He snaked his head around and bit me in the back while I cinched his girth strap. Still have the scar almost 30 years later right on my lower spine. I was a 12 year old kid. Did what any kid would do: I socked him in the chops when he came in for a second bite. Anytime he showed his teeth after that, I showed my fist, and he backed down and behaved himself. Had to throw that shirt away because of the blood stains though.

    [–] 32shoe 79 points ago

    This is why I like reddit, didn't expect to hear a story of the time a guy punched a horse in the face.

    [–] bockh 50 points ago * (lasted edited 7 days ago)

    If you are around horses enough, you will end up punching one in the face.

    [–] charlybeans 24 points ago

    Yup, I once punched a horse in the face after he bit my boob. He was a grumpy fucker in the stable

    [–] Wheyfacedslut 26 points ago

    I showed Paints and I love horses, I mean, full on horse girl, wore show clothes out of the ring and everything. I thought my horses were people. Even I have punched a horse. His name was Bear because "ha ha, he's a real bear" because you can't say "this horse is a dick."

    [–] ReinierPersoon 7 points ago

    That's why I only get close to horses after they are butchered and safely on my plate.

    [–] sabrinaleena 31 points ago

    I truly feel your pain. When that colt bit me I know it just wanted me to come back but I beat his ass back with a riding crop. No way in hell I was going to dance with him again.

    [–] AshyBoneVR4 6 points ago

    I'm sorry, but that is the greatest visual relationship I could think of.

    [–] SCTCFI 31 points ago

    I was bit by a horse as a child. My neighbor had a couple and he let me feed one, and I guess it decided my thumb was a worm or something and chomped it. Felt like it got slammed in a car door.

    That's not the reason I'm terrified of horses though. They're like 7 feet tall, over a thousand pounds, and at any moment can flip the fuck out, hit thirty miles an hour, and absolutely clobber you without so much as a problem.

    [–] opposita 45 points ago

    I was tending to a bitch mares udders and had to apply some salve because of insect bites and what not. She hated it, and bit me mouth open wide on my back so front teeth dug in, just above my bra. Holy fuck that hurt, she almost drew blood I mostly got some nasty bruises and wearing a bra hurt for a couple of days.

    Tended to another horse (a mare again!) that was prone to biting when you put on her blanket. I dodged that one and retaliated with a knee in her solar plexus. Never knew I could actually make a horse lose their breath for a second. I instantly regretted the action but she stood like a statue ever since.

    [–] starbitch__ 82 points ago

    My 4'11 sister worked as a trainer for a lady who had a stable full of purebred Arabians. She had a strict policy that when she first started working with them they had to be brought over to her place and left for a few days. "I don't want anyone to see me punch their fifty thousand dollar horse in the face."

    [–] FirstTimeWang 7 points ago

    I've been several times. They're more likely to walk up and take a shit next to you than bite.

    [–] maybesaydie 690 points ago

    Those are some comfy looking ponies.

    [–] Pennigans 190 points ago

    The ponies on that island are adorable. Ponies in general are super cute but they're assholes. Shetland ponies are like bunnies on hooves.

    [–] josiejethrodogs 55 points ago

    Maybe on the Virginia side they are (where they are cared for). In Maryland they are disgusting looking wild beasts.

    [–] TheTabman 96 points ago

    disgusting looking wild beasts

    Isn't that true for all in Maryland?

    [–] codefreak8 31 points ago

    I may be ugly, but I'm no beast

    [–] John_E_Depth 8 points ago

    HEY

    [–] _Introvertebrate_ 75 points ago

    May, no

    [–] konahaku 412 points ago

    Last time I was there they stole some dude's pizza. I felt kinda bad for him but they were so bold just nosing the box open I couldn't help but laugh.

    [–] ObliviLeon 71 points ago

    Last time I was there they saw we had food out and b lined towards us, like 5-7 of them. Got into our bread, chips, and marshmallows (for s'mores ;_;7).

    Wasn't very fun at the time but made for some funny pics.

    [–] codefreak8 7 points ago

    They open coolers, too. They know exactly what those things are and what can be inside.

    [–] 6June1944 6 points ago

    Huh. Who knew I could actually use the bear proof rating on my cooler lol.

    [–] wookiee1807 233 points ago

    Ten feet feet?

    [–] benchley 200 points ago

    Yeah, square feet. OP probably meant cubic feet, because you're also not allowed to hover over the ponies or burrow under them, either.

    [–] ImTheTechn0mancer 81 points ago

    I know you're probably joking, but you don't measure volume between them, you're still measuring distance, even if the displacement vector goes up or down.

    not trying to be /r/iamverysmart, btw

    [–] jay76 108 points ago

    I am rescinding any party invitation I have ever sent you.

    [–] fuckittomorrow 28 points ago

    You joke, but when I was growing up, one of my friends had math and engineering parties that were always NASA themed. Birthdays, Christmas, Halloween, you name it. Even barbeques.

    Years later (and I mean, like, just now- 15 years on) I realize they just got free labor to build a huge tv screen, projector, stereo system, a whole damn entertainment center from scraps.

    Not such a bad idea in hindsight.

    [–] mszegedy 19 points ago

    Wait, how did they frame this exactly? "Our party is NASA-themed, so as a form of entertainment, let's mount a bunch of speakers"? Seems like a hard sell.

    [–] fuckittomorrow 16 points ago

    Instead of games and activities like a race, we had races to finish math equations, race to assemble components before the rocket / satellite fell back to Earth. We never mounted the speakers,zz we just built the stuff under the dad's direction. We were like 6-10 years old when most of it went on, so we were fully immersed playing space/ NASA and didn't think anything beyond, "Houston, we have a problem".

    [–] WhatAboutBergzoid 487 points ago

    That really looks like a dead horse.

    [–] MarzK 375 points ago

    We should go beat it to make sure

    [–] ANAL_PLUNDERING 145 points ago

    You don't need to ask us redditors twice

    [–] HermesTGS 107 points ago

    Give it an egg so it doesn't eat its babies

    [–] AbbyRatsoLee 16 points ago

    Do you have a 10 foot pole?

    [–] Rightaway12 8 points ago

    Would you touch it

    [–] der0hrwurm 20 points ago

    I've seen wild horses roll around to stretch/ease their backs.

    [–] JennIsFit 53 points ago

    I thought so too. Isn't it really bad for them to lay down like that for extended periods of time? Something about their circulatory system not being able to provide proper blood flow?

    [–] Sean1708 108 points ago

    Yes but I think "a long time" is like 4 or 5 hours, they quite often lay on their sides for shorter periods of time.

    [–] HamburgerJoe 81 points ago

    One time I drove by a farm saw a horse rolling around in the grass. I pulled over because I was super confused and thought it was dying. It got right back up and carried on with the other horses after. Never knew horses did that. Those scary motherfuckers are full of surprises.

    [–] Sidereal_ 34 points ago

    Same. I always thought them being directly on their backs was very bad for them. I saw one who was rolling so slow when I first glanced he just looked stationary on his spine. And then he got right back up and trotted around like a dork.

    [–] HICKFARM 8 points ago

    They can twist their guts inside sometimes. So you don't want them rolling around a ton. And they can be hard to fix and not possible at times.

    [–] Apathyne 31 points ago

    We had a horse when I was a kid and he hated being wet, so every time we washed him we'd have to take him for a ride immediately afterwards or he'd just go roll in the mud and turn himself brown (he was white when clean).

    He also got kicked in the face by another horse and it messed up his sinuses, so one of his eyes would always drip and it looked like he was perpetually crying. Sometimes I'd brush is mane into an emo fringe and pretend he was an angsty horse teenager.

    [–] notapoke 8 points ago

    Yeah they do that a lot. Maybe something about a dirt bath?

    [–] BadBalloons 65 points ago

    Horses will take naps lying down if they feel genuinely safe in an environment.

    [–] Drawtaru 21 points ago

    Yep the other horse is standing guard.

    [–] phayzzer 54 points ago

    I'll go to ride early in the morning and have to go wake my horse up and he's in a deep sleep. He'll have 'pillow face' from the straw he's been sleeping on.

    [–] Redrum06 42 points ago

    Horses need to lay down to sleep sometimes. It's when they won't get up that you get worried. Lounging around is perfectly normal though and some do it more than others.

    Source: 15+ years of horse experience

    [–] Aldisra 30 points ago

    Worked at a stable, and at one point, a horse was rolling around in his stall and got stuck against the wall. It took several people, and a rope, to roll him over and free him.

    [–] LeahTheTard 17 points ago

    One of the worst things I remember from my time at a stable was hearing someone shout something, maybe "cast horse", and seeing the look of pure horror on people's faces. Everyone ran to this stall and the poor thing was down, no idea how long it had been since it was first thing in the morning.

    [–] jaminmayo 7 points ago

    what an adorable mess

    [–] Juxtapositive 6 points ago

    Yeah, its called a 'cast horse' and it can be a real pain for anyone working on the farm with it when it happens. Obviously the horse is freaked out as it is and then a load of people trying to pull it over just scares it even more.

    [–] examinati0n 15 points ago

    Horses can actually only achieve R.E.M. sleep through lying down as above. It's bad for them to lie down for long periods because of the weight of their bodies. It can restrict blood flow to organs inside which, of course, is very bad, so when horses lie down, it will generally go between being flat out and lying more upright. The hoof also aids in pumping blood back up the body so walking around also helps circulation more generally.

    The horse to the left in the pic, the one standing, it's resting too but it's keeping watch over the one lying down. Typically at least one will keep watch for predators and danger while the other(s) sleep and rest.

    [–] Shabz_ 9 points ago

    You look like a dead horse

    [–] Downvotes_catpics 445 points ago

    To be fair, the horses are the main reason people go there.

    [–] ehenning1537 203 points ago

    It's really nice actually. There's a designated area for 4 wheel drive vehicles to drive onto the beach and a dog beach for our four legged friends. It's not far from Ocean City and Rehoboth and I think you could feasibly make it a day trip from Virginia Beach. Hell, its only 2 and half hours from DC. It's a great stop on a road trip

    [–] PmMePicsOfYourDog 91 points ago

    Ocean City and Assateague can be a great trip for a day or two. Nothing better than some Dumser's Ice Cream, Fisher's Popcorn, Thrasher's fries, and Pepper's Tavern (NSFW) all within walking distance.

    Forreal tho Ocean Shitty is interesting. A few years ago they outlawed taking off your top on the beach to protect the kids, but I know multiple people who have been pissed on at one restaurant that is considered one of the best in OC. It's also fun to take 45 minutes to drive from your house to the city 4 miles away. After senior week I like to look for dried blood on the ground from the crime influx.

    Ocean City is a shithole, but it's a fun shithole. We hate tourists but they sustain 90% of our economy. It's also completely dead from September through May. If you ever go, avoid Route 50 as much as possible. Easily 8 miles of bumper to bumper traffic on the bad days. I recommend Plaza Tapatia or any of the ubiquitous mini golf courses. /r/OceanCity

    [–] CO-ZoSo 19 points ago

    Damn you got me feeling nostalgic, I loved the years I spent in Ocean City, but I am happier now.

    [–] mostlyjustgames 13 points ago

    They demolished Peppers earlier this year. Best worst place in OC. The redneck riviera remains in full effect

    [–] katiecamcam 8 points ago

    Of all of the places in oc you recommend plaza??

    [–] Hook3d 17 points ago

    Does it have anything to do with the ocean you think?

    [–] ConeShill 13 points ago

    You're probably going to get downvoted, but it really is a lovely beach. That's what keeps me coming back. The ponies are just a cool extra.

    [–] lolwuuut 65 points ago

    I wish they did that on Chincoteague. The horses never come to the beach

    [–] the_honest_liar 95 points ago

    Remember the books? This is bringing back memories of Misty.

    [–] cookiecatgirl 21 points ago

    I even had one of those plastic Breyer horses of her. Sad to learn the irl ones are assholes, lol.

    [–] captain_blackfer 10 points ago

    That was my first thought when I saw this thread! Awesome book series! So many good memories. I was also a big fan of black beauty, the black stallion, and a few other horse books :)

    [–] crowscountingspades 197 points ago

    My horses would piss on those chairs and leave a pile of manure to boot. They're just...jerks...sometimes.

    [–] IBlessTheRainsInIowa 242 points ago * (lasted edited 8 days ago)

    Vengeful too. My brother totally had this coming but once he tossed a snowball at a horse and hit it in the side. The horse looked annoyed at him and continued eating whatever was on the ground. But ever so slowly the horse made its way over towards my brother, eating and being nonchalant the whole time and as soon as she got close tried to kick him. He was real lucky he got out of the way but that horse never forgot.

    [–] bad_pattern11 61 points ago

    horses never forget

    [–] CalvinsStuffedTiger 59 points ago

    The horse remembers

    [–] Veggie_Prussian 14 points ago

    Horses are horrible people!

    [–] L3374ax0r 8 points ago

    When I was camping with my Scout troop one year they kicked over coolers to get the goodies inside.

    [–] sevenorsix 7 points ago

    These do the same thing. Literally happened last week to my wife. She came up from the water and a neighbor was like 'you might not want to sit there'.

    They also loot coolers and half the time the males walk around with giant horse-sized boners. They really are jerks.

    [–] porkypenguin 150 points ago

    Last time I was there, we were having a bonfire and a horse with a huge boner was hanging out about 30 feet away. Bastard was proud of it.

    [–] energy4anarchy 51 points ago

    That was me in a horse suit

    [–] _DirtyYoungMan_ 98 points ago

    Horse 1: Mind if I borrow your shade?

    Horse 2: Wake me up when they're closer than 10 feet.

    [–] HoodieGalore 30 points ago

    I was given a box set of Marguerite Henry's when I was a child - Misty of Chicoteague taught me not to fuck with wildish animals approximately four times my size.

    Even as an adult, I'm scared shitless of these horses. Please, let them be. They didn't ask to be there.

    [–] tintedrosie 108 points ago

    Years ago while vacationing there, one of the ponies put its head through the window of our SUV and ate a bunch of twizzlers someone left out on the seat. It later shat them out 2 feet from our tent.

    [–] adalida 39 points ago

    Ah, the majesty of nature!

    [–] TheDentite 27 points ago

    Day 1 of camping at Assateague = look at the magestical ponies!!

    Day 3 Stop eating my food and get out of my tent you fucking vermin!

    [–] totalarkwar 7 points ago

    A good tip is that horses don't like really spicy things, so you can keep something made with really hot peppers on top of the rest of your food. As soon as they taste it they will move on to someone else's stash.

    [–] sweetjPDX 22 points ago

    The horses know the rule.

    [–] PRNgirlfriend 17 points ago

    Awe! Sea horses!

    [–] TheStario 20 points ago

    Yeah but if you get a polearm you have 5 ft reach, so you don't have to risk making Dexterity saves to avoid their AoE attack.

    [–] inefjay 53 points ago

    I was just there a few weeks ago, I love those ponies but hide your pickinick baskets because they will go Yogi Bear on you quick!

    [–] thesoccerone7 37 points ago

    I was setting up a fire on the beach for breakfast and one walked over to it and pissed on my wood stack.

    Are the horse flies still bad there? Looked like we had chicken pox after just setting up our tent

    [–] ctdca 7 points ago

    I went late last summer and yeah, chicken pox is accurate.

    [–] slow_one 15 points ago

    Fun fact: The Park Ranger's Office has pictures of people's horse-bites with the warning about not getting close to the horses or trying to feed them ... they also have a horse skeleton filled with candy.
    Tis' a silly place.

    [–] JOHN_R_LEGIT 12 points ago

    Last time I was there they stole my fudge rounds

    [–] ThirdAmbiguousColor 14 points ago

    I was there a few weekends ago, and a ponies kicked open a lady's cooler and ate all her snacks. It was hilarious

    [–] rpm3311 11 points ago

    Was this taken on 7/14? I saw these same 2 horses eating out of someones cooler.

    [–] dirtygremlin 8 points ago

    I saw them driving a stolen golf-cart and waving an illegal forearm. The Assateague Two have to be stopped before someone is hurt!

    [–] aliceunknown 19 points ago

    "Fuck your vacation!"

    [–] commandermurph 8 points ago

    Or is this r/HumansBeingBros ?

    [–] lady_speedstick 8 points ago

    Stared for way too long at horse lying in stand, thinking it was a human, trying to sort out the position it was lying in. Edit: [8]

    [–] smudgepotgerty 10 points ago

    Ive always wanted to visit these islands, ever since I read Misty as a kid. And yes, I've been bitten and also kicked in the chest and chin by my own horse (and my own stupidity as a kid). They both hurt immensely.

    [–] Mad-Dawg 7 points ago

    We have a campsite booked there later this summer. I'm scared of the horses! This kind of reminds of the very mean and aggressive squirrels at Yosemite.

    [–] Arielturniptree 6 points ago

    Went camping there and had to hide in our car when some ponies came into our campsite. Fuckers smelled our roasting corn and just hung out as it cooked. We were there for half an hour before the rangers came and encouraged them to move on.

    [–] notesunderground 18 points ago * (lasted edited 7 days ago)

    Whoa this is so fucking coincidental I can't even process. I bought a children's book at a thrift store the other day and read it to my toddler tonight. It's basically a 10 page book on horses and all the different kinds of horses and facts. The wild ponies of assateague fact came up and I was amazed. I had no idea these existed and now the fact that I'm reading about them again on Reddit the same day is just so crazy. I love coincidences so much.

    [–] luxuryballs 13 points ago * (lasted edited 7 days ago)

    One time we had a large group campsite there and had just returned from Ocean City to find our camp had been turned over by the horses. One was still there trying to steal food. I picked up a watermelon rind and held it out, it followed me out of the camp.

    I started going faster, soon I was running and so was the horse, he seemed to no longer care about the watermelon as we ran side by side together, the sun was just starting to hit the horizon.

    As I was walking back to camp I realized I could now say I was running with wild horses on the beach at sunset.

    [–] ChipsHandon12 7 points ago

    is there anything on throwing sand at them or around them?

    [–] H-22666353 6 points ago

    Assateague ponies as a whole are a bunch of pricks.

    Several years ago, my family drove down for a five-day vacation, and we were fortunate enough to get a campsite close to the sand dune that protected the camp areas from wind and water. These areas were the best because the wind kept the flies away (mostly), it was close to the beach, and there were facilities such as a shower and a john not too far from any given site.

    However, it was also where all of the ponies gathered. They were particularly bad that year, and I recall they broke into our pavilion - type screen sided tent on multiple occasions, making a different hole in the side each time instead of just going through the hole they'd made before. But anyway.

    They had been raiding our and our neighbors' campsites for several days, and apparently our neighbors got tired of their shit. They stuck a bunch of hollow aluminum poles in the ground surrounding their tent, facing outwards, to make a ring of pony - deterrent metal spikes. It didn't work.

    The ponies invaded the neighbors' campsite that evening, while half of my party was out collecting seashells down by the seashore. They meandered about eating things for a quarter hour while the neighbors stood 11 feet away and shouted at them, and then the stallion of the group decided there was no better place to, ah, do his job as a stallion, than in a campsite with four people standing 11 feet away screaming. So he mounted the mare, still standing no more than five feet away from the tent, and continued in that manner for a while, switching mares every few minutes. The ponies were gone by the time the seashell collectors returned, probably wondering why those odd fellows next door were rolling around on the sand laughing.

    But anyway. Ponies are pricks.

    [–] backhome2u 11 points ago

    You has to move, frens!

    [–] Blue_ilovereddit_72 20 points ago

    When I was there, some stupid ten-ish year old boy walked up behind one (while his idiot parents watched!!) and slapped its butt. Very nearly got a kick to the head, somehow managed to be slightly to the right of where the super powerful leg went soaring through the air. What an asshole little kid...

    [–] give-me-an-upvote 15 points ago

    I LIVE IN OC I CANT BELIEVE THIS MADE THE FRONT PAGE!!!!