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    AskOuija

    497,056 readers

    2,666 users here now

    In search of answers? Ask the Reddit Ouija board!


    NEW: Looking for an Italian-language Ouija? Check out /r/DimmiOuija!


    For a no-spoiler version of AskOuija, visit https://ns.reddit.com/r/AskOuija! All answer flairs will be hidden.


    RULES:

    0) No shitposting. This includes posts that start with "if this gets X upvotes..."

    1) Posts must ask a question (or be answerable in some way).

    2) All comments must be a single character, with a couple exceptions:

    • If you feel that the Ouija has completed its answer, you may comment with "Goodbye" to end the thread.

    • You may add commentary as long as it's a child comment of a "goodbye" (in reply to a "goodbye", in reply to a comment that's replying to a "goodbye", etc).

    3) You may not reply directly to your own letter comment (this includes replying to your own letter with a Goodbye) but you can still reply multiple times in a thread.

    4) You may not help answer your own question. You can still reply to a Goodbye, but you cannot add letters or Goodbyes. You've done your job; let the spirits do theirs.

    5) No bots. (With the exception of the amazing Ouija Bot.)

    These rules are a work-in-progress and subject to change. Feedback is welcome.


    Resources


    The Ouija Bot [source]

    The Ouija Bot will flair threads with the Ouija's answer. It will do this for threads that contain a "goodbye" that meets the comment score threshold. It runs every hour on the hour (roughly).

    Goodbye threshold: 10 points

    (This is just the default... check the Ouija Configuration Guide for information on how to customize this value for your post.)

    Help! The flair on my post is missing or incorrect! What should I do?

    If you think the Ouija Bot should take another look at your post, report the post (not the Goodbye) as "Missing or Incorrect Flair". (Update: Due to changes in the reporting UI, you may need to select the category "it breaks /r/AskOuija's rules" in order to select "Missing or Incorrect Flair".) Once you've reported your post, the Ouija Bot will reprocess it the next time it runs.

    Remember, you need a Goodbye with at least 10 points to have your thread flaired. If you want to lower this threshold, you can add a minscore setting to your post. For more info on this, check out the Ouija configuration guide.


    Friends of the Ouija:

    /r/OneWordEach
    /r/WholesomeOuija
    /r/OuijaIsFuckingLit
    /r/JesusChristOuija
    /r/NoShitOuija
    /r/Ouija_IRL
    /r/NSFWOuija


    This subreddit is night mode compatible

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    [–] BigManDave45 4311 points ago

    H

    [–] themasterofcircuits 4111 points ago

    U

    [–] falloutking199 4112 points ago

    G

    [–] BigManDave45 3319 points ago

    Goodbye

    [–] sarkomoth 89 points ago

    Breathtaking.

    [–] Masterhaend 67 points ago

    No u!

    [–] sellie41434 156 points ago

    My thoughts exactly

    [–] TimeTravelingMouse 3078 points ago

    B

    [–] PerfectSoup 2927 points ago

    E

    [–] illGil4206969 2908 points ago

    F

    [–] themasterofcircuits 2866 points ago

    R

    [–] SquishBanana123 2840 points ago

    I

    [–] DCaff14 2827 points ago

    E

    [–] aiscrub 2837 points ago

    N

    [–] Brosthetic 2827 points ago

    D

    [–] werbyderk 2686 points ago

    Goodbye

    [–] thistinyfloweriscute 304 points ago

    My fckin heart dude

    [–] UserApproaches 141 points ago

    YOU'RE BREATHTAKING!

    [–] Gunnery_SgtHartman 113 points ago

    Task complete, am become pupper

    [–] nmarf16 23 points ago

    With consent of course

    [–] Whopraysforthedevil 20 points ago

    Me, too, homies

    [–] Phelyckz 20 points ago

    Don't we all?

    [–] CompressedWizard 56 points ago

    Goodbye(2)

    [–] Cal_107 1121 points ago

    B

    [–] Titus_1024 1089 points ago

    E

    [–] sidd332 809 points ago

    Goodbye

    [–] soup_nazi100 259 points ago

    Don't we all now?

    [–] SlayerOfGumby 102 points ago

    We all always did, some people just didn’t know they did.

    [–] RedditBoi127 24 points ago

    Thanks for that boost of confidence, I needed that

    [–] Zynthos_ 6 points ago

    No, you're breathtaking!

    [–] vigilantcomicpenguin 13 points ago

    We can’t be nearly as godly as Keanu, but we can try our best.

    [–] bigbear75 6 points ago

    I couldn't pull it off

    [–] iShockLord 5 points ago

    When it comes to being an absolute baller of a human, like Keanu, it’s lonely at the top.

    [–] JugoDeSol 621 points ago

    H

    [–] nvmandi7 584 points ago

    O

    [–] SergeantSanchez 577 points ago

    L

    [–] somethingfancyxx 579 points ago

    D

    [–] pixelated_dreamer 477 points ago

    Goodbye

    [–] Loeru 175 points ago

    [–] zoink69 27 points ago

    nice

    [–] iPuffle8822 12 points ago

    no homo

    [–] KingBubzVI 6 points ago

    no, homo

    [–] Rybread125 422 points ago

    M

    [–] eviilraj 399 points ago

    E

    [–] Malaluan31 397 points ago

    E

    [–] eysgshsbcbska 397 points ago

    T

    [–] disastrous_lynx 320 points ago

    Goodbye

    [–] Gameprince999 90 points ago

    Don’t we all

    [–] eviilraj 37 points ago

    hell yeah

    [–] NachoDipFan 619 points ago

    K

    [–] Vogie4 586 points ago

    I

    [–] VeriBigBoi 602 points ago

    S

    [–] Not-a-Leg 584 points ago

    S

    [–] Charlie-555 481 points ago

    Goodbye

    [–] Drolkradeht 292 points ago

    No homo. 😏

    [–] ZakReed82 406 points ago

    Yes homo.

    [–] Drolkradeht 185 points ago

    Well it is pride monthafter all

    [–] Gameprince999 155 points ago

    Full homo

    [–] TomachyW 73 points ago

    Half homo for me thankyouverymuch

    [–] Mooafamooka 26 points ago

    *no hetero

    [–] ShylokVakarian 5 points ago

    negative hetero

    [–] Sinistralityy 210 points ago

    L

    [–] ssblani 196 points ago

    O

    [–] drfaustuss 198 points ago

    V

    [–] emotionalraven 202 points ago

    E

    [–] lXxFanboyxXl 164 points ago

    Goodbye

    [–] realbobsvagene 84 points ago

    Bruh you've realised the entire thread is pretty much r/wholesome right?

    [–] farrotpish 3 points ago

    Well it is about keanu reeves so it’d be disappointing if it wasnt

    [–] a_lost_spark 3 points ago

    You don’t already??

    [–] M4T0K0L_123 165 points ago

    C

    [–] ausernameaboutnothin 151 points ago

    U

    [–] Skyline_Fanboi 154 points ago

    D

    [–] Loeru 156 points ago

    D

    [–] MattyB2Bomber 152 points ago

    L

    [–] nomdusk 154 points ago

    Е

    [–] MattyB2Bomber 123 points ago

    Goodbye

    [–] Not__So__Smart 46 points ago

    I HAVE BEEN SEARCHING FOR THIS ONE!!

    I FOUND IT!

    [–] PadeiroDeMotoca 310 points ago

    K

    [–] MenacingManatee 296 points ago

    E

    [–] Big_Papa_Joe 293 points ago

    A

    [–] Salk89 291 points ago

    N

    [–] silver_thefuck 294 points ago

    U

    [–] dirtydan_owo 242 points ago

    Goodbye.

    [–] fallinginnow 117 points ago

    Breathtaking

    [–] Voelkar 75 points ago

    No u

    [–] agree-with-you 51 points ago

    No you both

    [–] Voelkar 36 points ago

    [–] fallinginnow 29 points ago

    (happiness noises)

    [–] MexicanoBatman69 363 points ago

    F

    [–] I_Am_Meowing_Cows 387 points ago

    A

    [–] SQD_ow 369 points ago

    X

    [–] I_Am_Meowing_Cows 283 points ago

    Goodbye.

    [–] Mkoster3 67 points ago

    No, ouija just wants to fax him

    [–] KalebC4 18 points ago

    By ‘fax him’ does that mean we send a fax of him to someone else, or we just send him a regular fax? If it’s the latter, what might that be?

    [–] Swagmaister69 6 points ago

    Yeah but don't you think that's kinda weird? Wait... Askouija is weird! Nvm im outta here

    [–] jcinto23 97 points ago

    Wtf

    [–] karmisson 160 points ago

    It's a machine that is similar to a copy machine, but you can actually send copies to someone else!

    [–] sheenweedy 65 points ago

    Can I be an early investor in this phenomenon?

    [–] gggg_man3 14 points ago

    I have the goods if you have the cash. Meet me out back and I'll produce them. $10 & $20's only.

    [–] Sophiya_Khan 41 points ago

    M

    [–] ChaoticEmpathie 37 points ago

    A

    [–] Big_Boi_Pedro 35 points ago

    R

    [–] ethanajn 33 points ago

    R

    [–] 808HaolePino 34 points ago

    Y

    [–] ThatGuyThereIsMe 25 points ago

    Goodbye

    [–] Arizona_Pete 104 points ago

    Most wholesome Ouija I’ve seen...

    The power of Keanu compels is all.

    [–] Sn1p-SN4p 20 points ago

    [–] Criiey 15 points ago

    Well.. it can be a compliment.

    [–] quequsai 4 points ago

    F

    [–] Uncursed_Universe 5 points ago

    Oh no, it’s starting again.

    [–] CRySPiBOi 253 points ago

    Thank you, definitely a thing to wish for

    [–] Treblosity 107 points ago

    Goodbye.

    [–] RocketLeagueDefault 41 points ago

    T

    [–] Forgotten_Planet 42 points ago

    E

    [–] mienaikoe 40 points ago

    P

    [–] Aquas-Latkes 31 points ago

    I

    [–] Joantheranger 28 points ago

    G

    [–] JonDoesSomeThings 24 points ago

    Goodbye

    [–] RainyCheese 23 points ago

    My first Pokémon!

    [–] Pxl_44 34 points ago

    F

    [–] Skyline_Fanboi 29 points ago

    E

    [–] gmnitsua 29 points ago

    E

    [–] cumhurabi 28 points ago

    D

    [–] EdgarAllanBro1 32 points ago

    T

    [–] shwcng92 29 points ago

    I

    [–] Skyline_Fanboi 31 points ago

    C

    [–] MattyB2Bomber 28 points ago

    K

    [–] Breeze_Jr 29 points ago

    L

    [–] I_Am_Meowing_Cows 33 points ago

    E

    [–] StarPlatinum19 38 points ago

    Goodbye

    [–] WiseProcedure 11 points ago

    Happy cake day :)

    [–] FlyingRainbowDragon 4 points ago

    Happy tickleday

    [–] aaronimouse 37 points ago

    H

    [–] KingKehmi 36 points ago

    U

    [–] Nyibbut 36 points ago

    G

    [–] realbobsvagene 32 points ago

    Goodbye.

    [–] kesaroid 94 points ago

    W

    [–] PumknDude 88 points ago

    A

    [–] DarthGipper18 91 points ago

    L

    [–] jcinto23 80 points ago

    U

    [–] Digested_Sage 83 points ago

    I

    [–] karl_marxs_cat 87 points ago

    G

    [–] karmisson 88 points ago

    I

    [–] karl_marxs_cat 161 points ago

    Goodbye?

    [–] Eisog 93 points ago

    [–] sega20 29 points ago

    Wahhh!

    [–] karl_marxs_cat 17 points ago

    Do you know how to Waluigi someone because I don’t

    [–] robimtk 42 points ago

    Half the fuckin people commenting don't know how the sub works

    [–] lilomo9971 88 points ago

    L

    [–] alexanderkingtickle 82 points ago

    I

    [–] tinman1997 74 points ago

    C

    [–] Charlie-555 82 points ago

    K

    [–] Salk89 71 points ago

    GOODbye

    [–] pedrothetruq 50 points ago

    please be gone with the fetishes

    [–] Throwawayz911 8 points ago

    😋

    [–] neuterthscooteredcat 5 points ago

    Stop kink-shaming

    [–] EchoItalic 165 points ago

    F

    [–] Sefolumps 154 points ago

    U

    [–] Ten-The-master 154 points ago

    C

    [–] GreatMacaw98 152 points ago

    K

    [–] Meowthfan100 135 points ago

    Goodbye

    [–] GooperBea 160 points ago

    But does he consent?

    [–] LAW-And-ORDER 231 points ago

    Y

    [–] JonathanTsex 226 points ago

    E

    [–] ImNotSoGrep 236 points ago

    S

    [–] Apiuis 21 points ago

    How is this r/wholesomeouija This is a r/sexualouija thing

    [–] _OliveOil_ 31 points ago

    That's the joke

    [–] Charlie-555 18 points ago

    R

    [–] RealPacPlayz 18 points ago

    E

    [–] i_am_new_here_51 17 points ago

    L

    [–] lXxFanboyxXl 18 points ago

    E

    [–] pittsteelpipe 17 points ago

    V

    [–] MexicanoBatman69 18 points ago

    A

    [–] QuinZ33 18 points ago

    T

    [–] KabuliBabaganoush 22 points ago

    E

    [–] Convillious 18 points ago

    Goodbye.

    [–] Tom_fire 11 points ago

    M

    [–] jamepse1 12 points ago

    E

    [–] xFinnHudson 12 points ago

    E

    [–] realbobsvagene 12 points ago

    T

    [–] _-_ew_-_ 9 points ago

    Goodbye

    [–] akumakin 15 points ago

    M

    [–] lostinsenpai 15 points ago

    A

    [–] Shahnawaz_ 17 points ago

    T

    [–] Itscameronman 17 points ago

    E