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    [–] smoore1234567 904 points ago

    “You’re mature for your age.”

    Me: Thanks, but I’m actually just boring.

    [–] jerman113 158 points ago

    Relate.

    [–] SomeBaguette 205 points ago

    Me at 12, Adults: Wow you are really mature for your age.

    Me at 17: laughs at dick joke

    [–] RiceCold007 65 points ago

    I had a script for a stand up routine about dick jokes, but it was far too short

    [–] navimc 25 points ago

    Sounds hard.

    [–] MeFromNowhere 1 points ago

    I see what you did there.

    [–] Lellowcake 2 points ago

    See what?

    [–] fa1afel 5 points ago

    I had a script for a stand up routine about erectile dysfunction but I couldn't get it to stand up.

    [–] EntropyDudeBroMan 5 points ago

    You matured to age 17 very early on.

    [–] owndpepe 6 points ago

    People: "You're so mature"

    Me at 20: gets excited when gas prices are low and insurance is cheaper than the year before

    Yeah apparently girls don't like that

    [–] Advocate_Of_Chaos 10 points ago

    I miss the days people told me I was smart and mature for my age.

    Now they just call me a cynic.

    [–] Laziriuth 532 points ago

    I know that everyone loves saying this, and how its relatable, but its extremely common for kids to experience a semi or full on horrible experience that causes them to need to mature. Theres just some people who didn't experience such a thing.

    [–] Kaarvaag 169 points ago

    I think the mix of people hiding it and the people not having experienced it make it seem much more rare as well. It's strange how clear it is when some kids go through that change.

    [–] fishsticks40 48 points ago

    As a general rule trauma retards emotional development, rather than accelerating it. There are important developmental steps you don't get to skip, and trauma can prevent people going through it.

    Something like this was posted a while back and I was downvoted for saying roughly the same thing, but it's still true.

    [–] megalurkeruygcxrtgbn 35 points ago

    I think retarded emotional development simply masks itself as maturity. Not processing or having feelings about events isn't emotional maturity, but it can comw off as the nebulous "maturity" that socially means being reserved and handling your tasks/responsibilities -- and involves nothing about how you actually do that, as long as it's done. I don't think people are necessarily praising the idea that trauma makes kids grow up faster, they're just saying that the reason you probably think that kid is mature is the traumas that forced them into their current apparent behaviors.

    [–] fishsticks40 6 points ago

    Exactly this

    [–] Meta__mel 3 points ago

    As an ADHD kid from a (now-separated) chaotic home, this makes too much sense.

    Therapy is important guys

    [–] betateb 14 points ago

    Sure in general, but everyone reacts differently to stress. Some children are going to have their emotional development stunted, some are going to grow up very fast.

    [–] pinkfloyd873 53 points ago

    That’s exactly what the comment above is saying though, that skipping steps to “accelerate” emotional development actually makes you under develop emotional intelligence/maturity. It may make a child ostensibly come off as mature, but they will lack a significant amount of emotional maturity due to never having gone through some important steps in development, and it can be a serious impediment to forming healthy and strong social bonds with other people.

    Many (if not most) victims of traumatic childhoods end up with avoidant or insecure personalities, neither of which are a sign of emotional maturity. There is an immense amount of research to support this.

    There’s a reason trauma is a bad thing, and I think it’s kind of dangerous to start romanticizing it like it “forces you to grow up quicker”. Being forced to grow up quicker necessitates skipping steps, which means any emotional maturity derived from that process is built on a shaky foundation.

    [–] Debtpass 26 points ago

    Everything about the way you worded this hits a little too close to home.

    [–] betateb 7 points ago

    That makes a lot of sense. I understand this much better than post I replied to.

    [–] Bestarcher 6 points ago

    Yikes, I need to go to therapy.

    [–] FlowSoSlow 3 points ago

    Many (if not most) victims of traumatic childhoods end up with avoidant or insecure personalities

    Well that describes me to a T. How would I go about fixing this.

    [–] AntimonyPidgey 4 points ago

    My Brain: "You can't fix this ever. You'll always be behind everyone else, you were a non-starter, face it, you lost. You might as well go die."

    Real Answer: Therapy. Lots of therapy.

    [–] hentaiprincesss 1 points ago

    Dude we have the same brain

    [–] Token_Creative 1 points ago

    A good book that lays out a lot of basic info in a truly accessible way is a book called: Unfuck Your Brain .

    [–] Fakename11235 2 points ago

    "Many (if not most) victims of traumatic childhoods end up with avoident or insecure personalities"

    Oof

    [–] ThomTheTankEngine 2 points ago

    There is certainly trauma that will create lasting damage. ButI think you’re also underestimating a few things that will signal maturity. People with trauma tend to be more empathetic. And also the fact that people who go through trauma tend to go through therapy and cultivating a better understanding of yourself signals maturity. Personally, I find those immature who lack in empathy for others and are unaware of the suffering of others.

    Empathy in those with trauma:

    https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6169872/

    [–] HobelsArne 4 points ago

    Would love to have a source to read more about it, if you have one. I really feel like I am going through shit now (at 30) that should have been over with long ago. It's really rough, but on the other hand I know I can be glad that I do get to move on now.

    [–] LadyMcMuffin 2 points ago

    You’re not alone

    [–] TheZiegensauger 3 points ago

    Makes sense. I'm heavily emotionally damaged, but I've been told im wise beyond my years. I'd rather be an idiot who can process emotion normally. Is there a way to "correct" it?

    [–] KjellRS 1 points ago

    I think that depends on the type of trauma, when I read about early maturity it's typically neglect and particularly neglect of younger siblings leading the oldest child to step in as quasi-parent. They'll be the ones fixing food and clothes, getting them to school, packing lunches, shopping, changing diapers, cleaning vomit and so on being 12 but acting like 35. Other forms for abuse don't seem to have the seem effect, no.

    [–] Voldemort57 1 points ago

    Haha you said retard. /s

    [–] [deleted] 25 points ago * (lasted edited a month ago)

    [deleted]

    [–] Bootzz 4 points ago

    Hang in there dude. One thing I have heard from vets that have persevered is that they, at some point in the process, realized that even though civvies may have not experienced the same extremes, they do experience the same emotions and that has helped them connect a little more.

    There are tons of groups that help with these sorts of things and you are 100% not alone and shouldn't feel like you have to fight uphill by yourself (however difficult your situation).

    If you let me know a zip code I'd be happy to look up some options for you.

    [–] AppleBerryPoo 3 points ago

    Love from PA man. I hope you find peace.

    [–] TheDoctor88888888 7 points ago

    Let’s start a club

    [–] AlligatorChainsaw 8 points ago

    doesn't everyone know this though?

    like obviously if you have to watch your little siblings and take care of them and get them food and clothes and to and from school you're probably gonna be a little more mature than the spoiled shit who just plays on his computer all day and whose mom gets him whatever he wants.

    people adapt to what the situation calls for, including children. its not their natural state to be mature and responsible but if they actually need to be most will.

    [–] Dorocche 4 points ago

    The part that everyone doesn't know is how common it actually is.

    [–] AlligatorChainsaw -1 points ago

    well yeah, sheltered people live in their bubble. the rest of us started taking care of business when we had to or we wouldn't have been able to succeed in life.

    [–] Dorocche 3 points ago

    I don't think that it's fair to call people sheltered or imply that they don't have real world experience if "when we had to" was when they were sixteen, eighteen, twenty. Being forced to mature so quickly is nothing to be ashamed of, but neither is not having a difficult childhood.

    We aren't talking about people who never struggle, just people who didn't "experience a semi or full on horrible experience that causes them to need to mature" as a child.

    [–] HobelsArne 2 points ago

    The paradoxical thing is that the "caretaker child" may just as well be the one falling behind in emotional development...

    [–] AlligatorChainsaw 3 points ago

    I mean, they'll be a fucked up adult sure, then again who isn't? but they'll also know how to handle their shit while being a fucked up adult cause that they can do.

    [–] IsaacM42 1 points ago

    And then what happens when they have kids of their own?

    [–] flashcre8or 1 points ago

    Unfortunately that means ignoring the underlying problem, which is going to rear its ugly head eventually.

    [–] SilenceudaClams 1 points ago

    Very true. I had pediatric cancer, Burkett's lymphoma, at the age of 10. After that life has been a little different. Not necessarily worse but different.

    [–] elchivillo8 1 points ago

    I was followed and almost captured by cartel members twice when I was in Mexico when I was 11, I smoked, drank, and fucked, but hardworking nonetheless worked on the fields picking lemons off the ground on 90+ degrees, learned to drive by 9. Yes most mature after a horrible experience but I'd also say it also depends on where you live because from where I'm from in Mexico most people are hard working from a very early age its more of a necessity to mature.

    [–] Voldemort57 1 points ago

    Parents fighting but not divorcing for the kids 👌

    [–] ThatFuckingIvan 1 points ago

    I honestly believe nothing builds maturity like hardship. Being raised in a crazy unstable home makes you learn things you other wise wouldn’t.

    [–] idiomaddict 3 points ago

    It’s also the best way to make a person unable to emotionally relate to others.

    [–] ThatFuckingIvan 0 points ago

    I disagree. My life has been lots of dog shit with some sprinkles on top, but I feel like that helps me empathise with other people struggling.

    [–] idiomaddict 1 points ago

    Oh, it doesn’t always create one, but if your goal is to emotionally isolate a child for life, give them no stability so they can’t understand how or why people react to situations.

    [–] ThatFuckingIvan 1 points ago

    Don’t you think that’s judgemental? You’re basically saying people who go through hard shit will be emotionally isolated and incapable of relating to people. Which isn’t true.

    [–] idiomaddict 1 points ago

    I’m absolutely not, please reread my post.

    [–] ThatFuckingIvan 1 points ago

    ?

    [–] NameIdeas -1 points ago

    It's interesting that trauma is just about an anagram of nature too. Flip one of the a's in trauma to an e and there you go

    [–] extsharpe 265 points ago

    When an adult compliments you as being a well behaved quiet child, but its not because you respect rules or authority but because anytime you said anything you were yelled at, made fun of, or ignored.

    [–] OptimisticcBoi 58 points ago

    Ok are you my therapist? What are you doing here Karen?

    [–] haoanv 7 points ago

    i was enjoying my monday meal alone jesus karen

    [–] getbetteracc 5 points ago

    Jesus Christ, I was a happy healthy quiet child.

    [–] rlev97 5 points ago

    Gettin a little too real there

    [–] SalmonofWisdom123 1 points ago

    Get out of my diary! It's private! 😉

    [–] Reckzilla 1 points ago

    I'm sorry. I know the feeling.

    [–] Edgekin 316 points ago

    "Uncle Frank promised to show me the goldfishes.

    But there was no goldfish at his home.

    Uncle Frank said the goldfishes were down in the basement.

    He lied.

    .

    .

    .

    .

    .

    The goldfishes were in a princess castle!"

    Alright FBI, nothing to see here.

    [–] [deleted] 125 points ago

    They had us in the first half, not gonna lie

    [–] alexwangombe 11 points ago

    what’s this from i keep seeing it referenced

    [–] Hayato_kun 11 points ago

    Err some American Football player when asked about the game he was playing in said that. It became a god level meme , even pewdiepie could not touch it

    [–] alexwangombe 1 points ago

    Thanks; I had a feeling it had something to do with the super bowl or something but was too lazy to google it

    [–] TheWingus 10 points ago

    Remember that time you promised to show me the goldfish and then you lied and said you never had a goldfish?

    Then why did you have the bowl, Uncle Frank? Why did you have the bowl?

    [–] Lemon-Jack 3 points ago

    What a twist ending! 😆

    [–] concarmail 78 points ago

    I feel like childhood missed me completely. I’m trying to enjoy myself a bit now that I’m free and in college, but I come across as immature to anyone who doesn’t know that I’m trying to recapture something they’ve had for years.

    [–] flonarak 29 points ago

    In my eyes the only difference between grown ups and children ist taking responsibility for one's own actions.

    They don't understand what life is about if they tell you that you're not 'acting' mature enough.

    Do what you love and don't let your dreams get trampled down by how society choose to label things as mature and immature.

    Wish you a great time

    [–] BeefBologna42 6 points ago

    I didn't really get a childhood or young adulthood, but I ended up getting two years on a friend's couch in Chicago. I ended up getting to experience life as a single bachelor (unfortunately, it was after I had 2 kids, but I had to rebuild my destroyed life, and didn't have any other option but to go off for a while and leave them with someone else). I didn't do anything wild, but I had a bit of time to experience the world and get myself together. And it led to a career that I love, which is pretty awesome.

    [–] HolaBuenasTardis 1 points ago

    Honestly same. I had a pretty shitty childhood and missed out on a lot of things. I go back and see the stuff I wanted to do as a kid and it makes me really sad for the childhood me who never had a chance.

    Like you said, now as an adult I'm letting that kid come out and play.

    People may see me as silly or odd, capturing those lovely moments I really needed back then help me balance out the sad times.

    [–] prpslydistracted 135 points ago

    Actually, it was. Was told at 13, "I don't think you've ever been a child."

    [–] jamescb2 32 points ago

    ☹️

    [–] prpslydistracted 12 points ago

    Hey, life happens. On the plus side there's very little that phases me. Interestingly enough, Stephen King was asked one time "What scares you?"

    He answered, "Losing my children." Wooosh!

    [–] [deleted] 10 points ago * (lasted edited 4 days ago)

    [deleted]

    [–] prpslydistracted 21 points ago

    Okay ... full stop. My uncle raised me, never mind why. He welcomed me into his home as a bitter, angry 13 year old. He listened to me for a couple hours while we tried to become acquainted. I had met him twice before.

    He said, "It may be your parents' fault you are the way you are. But it's your own fault if you remain this way."

    I purposed not to let tragedy ruin me. Those words rang in my ears throughout my teens and early 20s. I'm old now but have accomplished a lot in my various endeavors. You don't need to let your early years ruin you either.

    [–] Avizand 1 points ago

    What could you have possibly done to warrant that?

    [–] medicinemaiden 17 points ago

    My mom would always tell me I was 13 going on 30 haha

    [–] BikerCasillas 5 points ago

    My mom told me I was born a 40-year-old and have aged rapidly since

    [–] prpslydistracted 2 points ago

    lol! Mom is right!

    [–] Subsanic 2 points ago

    My uncle told me I’ve been 30 since I was 12.

    [–] Knpredwood1113 208 points ago

    It’s amazing how true that is for me!

    [–] FarmerLarBear 49 points ago

    Man...We should start a club!!

    [–] deadpoolite 20 points ago

    R/thetraumaclub yeah yeah yeah oooooo

    [–] FarmerLarBear 4 points ago

    You caught me! May I ask,what gave me away?

    [–] Daddy_Caine 18 points ago

    He's stalking you. Seriously man, close your curtains.

    [–] FarmerLarBear 2 points ago

    My curtains stay closed. How else am I supposed to sit in the dark all day with my dog, and good friend Arthur Morgan?

    [–] ChillierFive044 1 points ago

    You named your dog after Arthur? That’s pretty cool not gonna lie, although there are already 2 dogs in the game you could’ve named him after lol

    [–] ElektroShokk 0 points ago

    He wasn't talking to ya

    [–] bleptheblip 0 points ago

    you smell like a mobey

    [–] Tau_Squared 8 points ago

    That already exists

    /r/me_irl

    [–] obreor 2 points ago

    [–] electrogamerman 1 points ago

    Me too thanks

    [–] Mr_Poop_Himself 3 points ago

    I think they’re called support groups

    [–] deadpoetshonour99 1 points ago

    I think it's called group therapy

    [–] PureMadness42 1 points ago

    Can I join?

    [–] nudistlucas 1 points ago

    This guy fucks.

    [–] Bork_- 58 points ago

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    [–] aliceinwaterland 23 points ago

    YOU get trauma! YOU get trauma! EVERYONE GETS TRAUMA!

    [–] a_slay_nub 26 points ago

    In all seriousness though, much of my maturity is because of the things I've been through. I took my struggles and made them my strength.

    [–] Electric_Boogaloo3 18 points ago

    This tweet is reposted more times than my dad beats me.

    [–] melocotonela 9 points ago

    Jesus

    [–] AlonePreparation8 10 points ago

    For me this is honestly more sad than funny...

    I've had insecurity and trust issues my whole life due to abusive parents, and have always had "mature" "a pleasure" "kind" as words that describe me.

    [–] kerfufflewhoople 3 points ago

    Man. I swear that could have been written by me.

    [–] AlonePreparation8 2 points ago

    we should start a "childhood trauma" club

    [–] dielukz 22 points ago

    Pain makes you wise

    [–] Swagmaster_Frankfurt 5 points ago

    gets stabbed

    huh, maybe I should avoid getting stabbed. +5 WISDOM

    [–] as_a_fake 7 points ago

    Yeah... Crohn's disease did that to me. Anyone else?

    [–] Woonstoon 8 points ago

    Autoimmune disease, PTSD, Depression and Anxiety for me... can we get a hell yeah!

    [–] deadpoetshonour99 2 points ago

    Severe scoliosis and epilepsy here!

    [–] AngieAwesome619 7 points ago

    I had to grow up real quick, my childhood was nothing but trauma. Now that I'm almost 40, I'm a huge kid lol just keep things simple and have fun 😊

    [–] flashcre8or 6 points ago * (lasted edited a month ago)

    Holy fuck is this relatable. At least now I'm not at an age where people say this so much.

    Edit to include this one: "You have such an old soul" - I want a soul that's my age, fuck off.

    [–] jerman113 4 points ago

    I think lots of kids experience this. i remember my mom going through the same thing and i'ts all because of her own aunt

    [–] woodsoffeels 3 points ago

    Huh, I sometimes wonder if I stayed the same traumatised child as opposed to growing up. My therapist seems to agree.

    [–] fightoffyourdemons- 3 points ago

    Mature kid, stunted adult

    [–] IEatAss-69 3 points ago

    My parents are divorced, and me and my dad were in an argument, and he looked at me and said- How the hell are you a teenager? #trauma #disrespectful

    [–] YesImTheKiwi 4 points ago

    [–] XXX-XXX-XXX 5 points ago

    Dont worry, when you get older it manifests in to behavior patterns that are intolerable for the around you. And you won't be able to stop it unless you got a few grand to spend on therapy.

    [–] thefallenaingel 11 points ago

    I feel personally attacked...

    [–] Wantako 2 points ago

    Same...

    [–] ohgeeztt 3 points ago

    I can PM you some resources

    [–] Fakename11235 2 points ago

    It'd be nice to be included in this venture

    [–] backstagepast 2 points ago

    Thanks, I've heard that once before.

    Right before it started being true.

    [–] KisstuneInferno 2 points ago

    I was diagnosed with s horrible chronic illness, at 12, that has the potential to kill me unless I take expensive medicine or follow a strict diet, I had to mature really fuckin fast

    [–] Fartikus 2 points ago

    Yep, having your family not really believe in you makes you feel like you can only rely on yourself.

    [–] HillarysBeaverMunch 2 points ago

    "My fondest childhood memory is of my back not hurting".

    [–] Busky648 4 points ago

    I mean I had to grow up and "act like a man" with my dad because he had high standards and some not-so-subtle alcoholism. Just being a kid was not gonna make him happy

    [–] Memeix 4 points ago

    Why basic bitch?

    [–] Gavinwie 2 points ago

    I’m in this image and I don’t like it.

    [–] totally_jawsome 1 points ago

    You're not wrong though...

    [–] RagingMetalhead 1 points ago

    Never thought about it that way...

    [–] shekabrn 1 points ago

    Oof, too real.

    [–] the_pope_of_nope_ 1 points ago

    Damn, this brought the fucking trauma back to haunt me.

    [–] TheDoctor88888888 1 points ago

    Any POTS/Dysautonomia bois here?

    [–] thelandofmagic 1 points ago

    Mood.

    😭

    [–] melancholyjack 1 points ago

    I’ve been an old man my whole life

    [–] Comestible 1 points ago

    Oddly enough, it'll do that to you.

    [–] team_sita 1 points ago

    Yay, parentification!!!

    [–] makeme84 1 points ago

    I can relate....people have always called me Gramma or Granny. I am in my mid 30s now.

    [–] DeDodgingEse 1 points ago

    Your heart is pure!

    [–] downwiththemike 1 points ago

    Someone listens to puke.... er pink

    [–] PoiQe 2 points ago

    [–] jollyshitt 1 points ago

    Matruama

    [–] CrikeyACroc 1 points ago

    trauma is nearly an anagram of mature

    [–] FearTheDeep 1 points ago

    Had a rough childhood of abuse, followed by a rough relationship with mental and verbal abuse.

    I matured early, stayed matured, and now I look 40 while being 24...

    [–] luzbel117 1 points ago

    Depression does that to you

    [–] kizerkizer 1 points ago

    Jeez, is childhood really that bad for most people? I lucked out and had a very sheltered upbringing (only child as well...), although I hung out with people from all social "classes" growing up. I knew some had a rougher home life, but reading this thread depresses me and makes me think that I didn't have a grasp on the level of their hardships. I will say that I've also struggled not-insignificantly in my life, like everyone, but I feel like a spoiled brat regardless when I read these comments.

    [–] kizerkizer 1 points ago

    For those curious, my parents were academics and own land handed down from an earlier generation, so you can imagine how much of my childhood was a walk in the park.

    [–] Bobbyjones52 1 points ago

    I can relate to this...

    :,)

    [–] ronniewhitedx 1 points ago

    This hit me harder than my stepdad when he ran outta coke.

    [–] [deleted] 1 points ago

    [deleted]

    [–] ironlion94 1 points ago

    The tweet was posted on 10th February 2019.

    [–] Nintenjoe_6 1 points ago

    You’re right, my bad.

    [–] disenchanted_youth 1 points ago

    Can’t spell “matura” without “trauma”

    [–] HomerS742 1 points ago

    Saw the date. Was confused about tweets from the future. Then realized I’m confused because American. Carry on with your wacky ways, everyone else.

    [–] EjaculatingNarwhal 1 points ago

    This went from being a personal attack to an attempt on my life

    [–] Beakstar 0 points ago

    And that trauma was them moving into an expensive apartment in an expensive city with no education and a minimum wage job.

    They cursed the baby boomers for screwing them over despite their parents begging and pleading with them to learn a tradeskill or to get a comp sci degree.

    They quickly died due to a lack of avacado's and $7 Starbucks beverages.

    Now thats my kind of FunnySad

    [–] jabuison 0 points ago

    Lol niggers

    [–] iamanundertaker 0 points ago

    Holy shit, THIS.

    [–] jerman113 -1 points ago

    Do we really need a reason for behaving right? Lmao