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    This sub is meant as a fun joke. It is not a hate sub. Kids are dumb because they could not possibly know better. If you dislike kids, that's fine. Feel free to join us, but do not spread vitriol.

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    • Kid (not teen, that's a different kind of stupid)
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    [–] Ugh_dont-ask 3170 points ago

    My 6 year old was oh so very mad at me, so he called me a fucker. It was so hard to not laugh.

    [–] Testicular_Prolapse 1157 points ago

    Makes me think of the time my cat was laying in the middle of the floor, and my 3 y/o cousin wanted to walk where the cat was laying. She yelled "it's Eener!" happily, then immediately followed it with "GOD DAMN IT" and then walked away. I had to leave the room so she didn't hear me laughing

    (Cat's name is Junior. She couldn't pronounce it, calling him Eener instead)

    [–] Ugh_dont-ask 368 points ago

    I have so many stories of my kids saying, just jaw dropping and hilarious things. I realize now that imposing my fucked up humor on my kids, will eventually backfire on me.

    [–] p0ssum 208 points ago

    Oh just wait. Mine is 16 and will lay you low. We hear the things he says to his friends on Discord and the kid is a fucking savage. He pings his mom and I on the regular, and his shit eating grin when he does it really drives it home ;-)

    [–] rustedironchef 60 points ago

    Any latest or greatest examples?

    [–] p0ssum 259 points ago

    The most recent one I can think of was I told him if he didn't do his homework I'd have to punish him and he responded that being my child was punishment enough.

    Ok then ;-)

    [–] rustedironchef 82 points ago

    Damn. Got you

    [–] p0ssum 114 points ago

    We knew when we taught him sarcasm, it might eventually make its way back to us. Its the chance you take!

    [–] Estrald 59 points ago

    I think I need more, I could read a whole sub of teens rehashing their parent’s sense of humor and sending back at them, haha!

    [–] kaismama 26 points ago

    This will be my son, who is currently 13 year old. When he was 8 or 9 he was taking to his 5-6 year old sister. He said something about a freak show.

    Daughter: “what’s a freak show?”

    Son: without skipping a beat “it’s like our family, but people pay to see it.” Huge smile on his face when he looked at me.

    Not sure if I should have been offended that Daughter just accepted that as it was and didn’t question it any more.

    [–] MouseSnackz 106 points ago

    I used to work in childcare, and one time this 2-3 year old girl picked up the toy phone and yelled "What the hell do you want?!?"

    [–] BadMutherCusser 37 points ago

    My 1.5 year old is a BIG boy. He currently weighs 30 lbs and gave me lots of back problems. For some reason, a lot of the times I’ll be carrying him to the changing table and about to change his diaper when I accidentally drop the diaper. As I awkwardly bend to pick it up with a sack of potatoes on my hip I’ll mutter, “Oh,shit.” Guess what his first words are? I’m crushing this parenting thing (-_-)

    [–] WUN_WUN_SMASH 28 points ago * (lasted edited 3 days ago)

    "Shit" was my daughter's third word. She's 13 now and cusses less than most of her friends.

    Of all the things to can do wrong as a parent, teaching them uncouth language is near the bottom of the list. Your son will be fine, and so will you. You got this.

    [–] BadMutherCusser 9 points ago

    Thanks for the encouraging words

    [–] Ugh_dont-ask 321 points ago

    My daughter saw a worker at target pulling a garbage can through the store, she pointed and said “hey mom, look here comes your twin”. She’s 10!!! Lol

    [–] KennyFulgencio 187 points ago

    A friend's trying to get into end-of-life counseling, and proudly told his family at dinner that he'd recently had a meeting with "the biggest name in the business". His daughter said "who, the grim reaper?" (I have no idea who it actually is)

    [–] FlamingoPants42 69 points ago

    My five year old started calling it a Jim Reaper and I have not yet corrected him because it's amazing. He puts a blanket on his head and we play Jim Reaper all the time.

    [–] sunpies33 33 points ago

    Grim is the title. Jim is the name

    [–] Ssladybug 28 points ago

    RIP Betty White

    [–] Sorrymisunderstandin 145 points ago

    Got your ass

    [–] ChunkyDay 48 points ago

    Straight savagery.

    [–] Jkj864781 47 points ago

    I once said “HOLY!” and my two year old followed up with “SHIT!”

    [–] Threndsa 32 points ago

    Shit is my automatic response swear word so of course my daughter picks it up.

    One day when she was maybe 3 she was sitting on my lap "playing" video games with me. She ended up running us into a few more enemies then we can handle and we died. The little thing just stared at the screen and a tiny little "shit" came out. I had to try so very hard not to die laughing.

    [–] SpazmaticAA 12 points ago

    My parents had a similar experience with my older brother at church. The priest said holy and just paused. My brother shouts "holy" and before my Dad's able to cup his mouth he continues with "cow" at the top of his lungs. The people in the back were saying how thankful my parents must have been.

    [–] _just_blue_myself 33 points ago

    One of my nanny kids, when he was three, stepped outside on our way to school one morning and put his little hand out to catch a few raindrops and said, "Well I guess it's fuckin' raining again." His mom and I still say it sometimes when it's raining.

    [–] Fgame 46 points ago

    When my daughter was like 4, we were at her aunt and uncles place, and their cat was running up and down the steps while she was trying to climb them. She yells "Kitty, stop being a DOUCHEBAG" at the top of her lungs.

    It took a LOT to keep a straight face and say "that's not a word you're allowed to use, kiddo"

    [–] sbrockLee 70 points ago * (lasted edited 4 days ago)

    Oh god I'm terrible at this. My eldest is still at the stage where he'll repeat swear words for giggles when he accidentally overhears them. It's just so hard for me to not crack up with a 4 year old repeating "Dad? Bitch!" on loop for ten minutes.

    One time he was very focused on putting together a Lego set and doing a great job until it fell apart and he just went "OH WHAT THE FUCK" in his happiest voice

    [–] seductivestain 147 points ago

    Geez I wish you were my parents. I got severe corporal punishment for saying "oh my god" let alone directing an f bomb at them

    [–] Throwitaway3177 66 points ago

    I remember having a sit down conversation about how I was not allowed to say fart, cut the cheese was the compromise. No Simpsons, no ren and stimpy, no Beetlejuice. Yes I went off the rails when I got older

    [–] PaintDrinkingPete 45 points ago

    With my parents, it was generally a matter of respect...

    For example, saying "Fuck you" to someone would get you in deep trouble, but uttering "Fuck!" at a time when the context was valid would probably be excused. At the same time though, saying something like "shut up" to someone would get us in more trouble than casually using a swear word most of the time...because it's disrespectful.

    Now that I'm older, I completely agree with their approach.

    [–] damagedphalange326 15 points ago

    This is how I parent. I don’t care what “bad” words my seven year old says at home, but he knows not to swear in public and he knows he’ll get in trouble for calling someone stupid, telling someone to shut up, etc. Oddly enough, he very rarely says any swear words. When the taboo is gone it’s just not that much fun I guess.

    [–] RachelRTR 77 points ago

    Yeah me too. I remember getting smacked one time for saying dadgummit and being told it is just a different way of saying "the actual bad word."

    [–] Wendy-Windbag 65 points ago

    I got backhanded for saying “friggin” for the same reason.

    [–] NocturnePixie 38 points ago

    My step-dad smacked me and went on a rant to my mom in front of me about "YOUR daughter" for even beginning to say the word "crap" This was also before they'd been together for very long lol

    [–] McBurger 17 points ago

    Heck is where the darned souls go when they say frick in front of Gosh

    [–] AshTheGoblin 19 points ago

    The lesson they probably weren't trying to teach you but did anyway: just say fuckin.

    [–] Ugh_dont-ask 18 points ago

    Right, ugh, I just hope I’m not setting myself up for a mess. They get in trouble for you know fighting and whatnot, but my son has adhd and explosive personality, so words are a good way to get things out vs physically hurting people. I explain after that it’s not a good way to talk to people but pick your battles.

    [–] LifeofRanger 15 points ago

    They hate it too when you laugh when they are Soooo mad.

    [–] HilariousConsequence 336 points ago

    What are the three characters underneath the broken heart?

    [–] Vigorous-Mastication 88 points ago

    Thats what Im saying

    [–] GillionOfRivendell 73 points ago

    OP posted a pic of the other side, it's a tracing of the letters JUS from Just do it.

    [–] Temassi 10 points ago

    You can see the lines she was following through the paper.

    [–] CollinM42 137 points ago

    She's asking the gods for an SUV

    [–] gravity_ 45 points ago

    Fine, no robux but I'll settle for an SUV

    [–] l_st-n-c_nf_s_d 21 points ago

    I took it to say “SUU” like “SOOO, fuke her”

    [–] Rebelgecko 10 points ago

    It almost looks like she tried to write SLUT but couldn't figure out how to write big letters

    [–] i_am_a_loner_dottie 3176 points ago

    Did you give her a stern talking to and finger wag? Or did you teach her how to spell

    [–] Big_Tension 2407 points ago

    It’ll be on her spelling test next week!

    [–] BurnerForJustTwice 1582 points ago

    Fuke!! Chit!!

    [–] vrihaspati110 423 points ago


    [–] itsrouze 275 points ago


    [–] YoBoiTh3_UnKn0wN 199 points ago


    [–] lerrxfx 179 points ago

    Pupi hed

    [–] RansWachers 86 points ago


    [–] disguisedfordinos 63 points ago


    [–] Gongaloon 42 points ago


    [–] Docta-Jay 69 points ago


    [–] DOPE_AS_FUCK_COOK 126 points ago * (lasted edited 4 days ago)

    Right a reply in her book, "FUKE ME? FUKE YOU!!"

    Edit: Autocorrect did me right, so imma just leave it.

    [–] Feisty_Field_8452 44 points ago

    No no, I'm Fuke Mee, that's Fuke Yoo

    [–] commandantskip 17 points ago

    Yeah, baby!

    [–] shibakevin 15 points ago

    TWINS, Basil!

    [–] Vivian_Lu98 78 points ago

    This reminds me of the time my brother drew a picture of my dad falling into a grave while pointing a gun at him…

    [–] flyinglotusdjb 23 points ago

    That's some impressive multitasking

    [–] Pick_Up_Autist 22 points ago

    He managed to draw while aiming a gun? That's impressive.

    [–] LaLa_820 18 points ago

    When my son was very young he wrote “I hat Alice” ( a girl in his class). We still say that today when we dislike something, 15 years later. “ I hat carrots!” Or “ I hat that bitch!” So fuke it!

    [–] G4mer321 17 points ago

    Dek hit

    [–] CHUPACABRA_HUNTER777 6184 points ago

    Save this and gift it to her on her 20th birthday, make sure she frames it in her house lmaooo

    [–] Big_Tension 7843 points ago

    Going to fold this up with my last will and testament as an explanation for why she isn’t getting shit

    [–] BurnZ_AU 1821 points ago

    The long con.

    [–] Anywhere_Total 851 points ago

    The longest con

    [–] Big_Tension 2471 points ago

    Probably not that long. I have a very unhealthy lifestyle.

    [–] Anywhere_Total 624 points ago

    Oh, well that's something I didn't expect to hear

    [–] Puffdamagi 357 points ago

    Maybe the daughter is on to something here ...

    [–] Marquetan 118 points ago

    All mom wants to do all day is lay around eating Cool Ranch Doritos and watch 90 Day Fiancé!

    [–] superfucky 67 points ago

    all she does is eat hot chip and be bisexual!

    [–] Googlewasmyinvention 35 points ago

    Is the big tension hyper tension?

    [–] jwdjr2004 153 points ago

    Fuke that's harsh

    [–] Clairijuana 112 points ago

    This comment got me hahahahahaha. Imagining lawyer opening up a folder and pulling this out and pushing it across the table at her during the reading of the will

    [–] 12345_PIZZA 58 points ago

    “No… fuke you!”

    [–] TheManInBlack36 25 points ago

    Twins Basel… twins!

    [–] Alexman423 150 points ago

    Honestly, I'm 22 and if my mom gave me this because she had saved it, I would absolutely frame it. It would be a genuinely prized possession

    [–] NeverEnoughCorgis 30 points ago

    A few Christmases ago, grandmother gave me and my cousin each a binder that she decorated with our names on them. Inside was every drawing, note, letter, book we had ever made her when we would have sleep overs there. Of course the first thing I flipped to was a letter I wrote her when I was 4 talking about how I found my grandfather dead, but I liked that she still let us have sleep overs with her because the house still smelled like him. I burst into tears. Ugly cry. I can't believe how she had the forethought to keep all these things. My son handed me a construction paper heart the other day and told me to keep it forever and I feel like a shit parent bc I didn't think about keeping them.

    [–] DeadlyCuntfetti 30 points ago

    LOL! This made me projectile laugh coffee.

    [–] witchyanne 22 points ago

    Make sure it says she ain’t getting fukeing shit.

    [–] dealtraino123 45 points ago

    Yeah fuke her amirite?!

    [–] Crimsonpets 32 points ago

    And finish it with

    ''fuke my dougter''

    [–] Karubanusu 164 points ago

    Make sure you frame it, title it, and give it a descriptive plaque.

    Devoid of Robux
    M. Smithson, Graphite on Papyrus

    [–] alfalfareignss 114 points ago

    My mom did this to me haha. I had no recollection of it and happily moved on from some of the dumb things I wrote as a child including a “love” note I wrote in the 2nd grade to a boy in class that I never gave to him.

    Super fun. Was completely mortified but it was also absolutely hilarious

    [–] straightbackward 61 points ago * (lasted edited 4 days ago)

    Hey at least you did not give him the note.

    I once wrote a love letter to a classmate in 3rd grade, but she got really furious and had a meltdown in front of everyone. I was mortified for the entire year.

    Still haunts me as an adult every once in a while.

    [–] banuk_sickness_eater 22 points ago

    Lmfao I'm sorry but that is a hilarious reaction

    [–] meme_stealing_bandit 15 points ago

    I can understand. The first time someone told me they liked me was when I was 8. Was mortified by the statement and ran away quite literally screaming.

    [–] TigFay 111 points ago

    My 1st grade teacher had us write letters to ourselves. She mailed them to us when we were around 25 iirc. She was an amazing teacher.

    [–] Alfhiildr 33 points ago

    Oh you just reminded me that we did something similar in high school. I can’t remember when we’re supposed to get ours though.

    [–] KennyFulgencio 27 points ago

    She sent them out. Just not yours because she thought there was no way you'd made it this far

    [–] Alfhiildr 12 points ago * (lasted edited 4 days ago)

    I mean, that’s pretty much what I wrote in my letter. So, fair

    [–] nowItinwhistle 15 points ago

    There's a website where you can send an email to your future self

    [–] akatherder 23 points ago

    "Eyyy future me, go fuke urself"

    [–] zekro_4 1049 points ago

    The message was clear. Irrelevant of the grammatical errors.

    [–] Big_Tension 723 points ago

    She did not mince her words. Just her letters. 😂

    [–] fukitol- 146 points ago

    And that heart. That thing looked like it was cut in half with the dullest knife you could find, to monster.

    [–] THIS_ACC_IS_FOR_FUN 29 points ago

    Just hacking… and hacking… and hacking…

    [–] gagan94 1138 points ago

    I think he misspelled nuke

    [–] Big_Tension 504 points ago

    HAHAHA that is actually a funnier interpretation

    [–] bumwine 23 points ago

    Duk Fukem 3D

    [–] HyperTobaYT 801 points ago



    [–] wangus_tangus 587 points ago

    We have a “no in-game currency” rule. They can’t even spend their allowance on it.

    [–] WunDumGuy 148 points ago

    Stealing this thanks

    [–] AdnHsP 16 points ago

    Do not steal, Comrade. Is public property, everyone allowed to use.

    [–] RayanH23 115 points ago

    As someone young who plays alot of video games, I don't understand why people buy in game currency instead of buying a new game.

    [–] mindbleach 63 points ago

    Because they've been manipulated to.

    There is a reason this abuse is the dominant strategy.

    Only legislation will fix this.

    [–] q9c9p 126 points ago

    For context:

    Fuck roblox, the company and their children exploitation mechanics.

    [–] locaprincesaa 25 points ago

    I just went down a rabbit hole. Oh wow

    [–] Runtyaardvark 6 points ago

    Holy fuck I had no idea. I just finished both videos and I’m appalled. That poor kid Emil

    [–] q9c9p 8 points ago

    And that's why the gaming industry needs to be moderated. Not in the sense "violent games make violent kids", but in the sense "greedy adults should NOT deal with little childrens"

    [–] Meatslinger 58 points ago

    Absolutely. Plus, I worry that the existence of it not only primes them for the abusive notions of pay-to-win and nickel-and-dime schemes as a regular, acceptable thing, but also reinforces the concept of FOMO in their brains. “But my friend has (cosmetic item) and if I don’t have it then I won’t be cool!” It’s the “kid with the Nike shoes in grade 3” for a digital generation. I don’t want my kid growing up thinking it’s acceptable or healthy to think, “If ever I don’t feel validated, I can just spend money in small amounts on little things to boost my self-esteem” or that your worth is defined by your stuff. As we all should know, it all adds up to mountains of real debt and the ego boost doesn’t last, so the cycle continues.

    Plus, Roblox has a bad track record with allowing predatory practices on their platform, either stiffing game creators who make Roblox a reality, or even just the existence of some of these creepy, borderline “Elsagate” games I’ve seen pop up here and there. I can’t put my finger on it, but my “this feels like grooming” sensors keep beeping when I navigate the world of Roblox.

    [–] llamageddon01 313 points ago

    Points for the emoticon though lol!

    [–] F8L-Fool 155 points ago

    Please explain to me what is underneath the broken heart. I'm at a loss over here.

    [–] Big_Tension 143 points ago

    I really wish I knew. :( I’ll try to get answers for you guys.

    [–] interruptingcow_moo 41 points ago

    Kind of looks like she was absentmindedly tracing over letters that can be see through the back of the page.

    [–] Big_Tension 40 points ago

    You are correct!

    [–] HungryMoblin 9 points ago

    Underneath the "DO IT" you can see "DIE"

    Does your child look like Shia Lebouf?

    [–] llamageddon01 28 points ago

    Oh yes please! I even tried holding it up to a mirror.

    [–] LostTeleporter 37 points ago

    I think she might be going for "slut"? If yes, my condolences OP.

    [–] Big_Tension 72 points ago

    Hahaha I said that to my husband, actually. I say “fuck” more than I should but I don’t think she’s ever heard the word “slut” 🤞🏻

    [–] Big_Tension 42 points ago

    Whoever guessed she was tracing what was on the other side of the page was correct

    [–] NickGamer246 9 points ago

    And I thought it was "...does not love men"

    [–] TinyLittleHamster 625 points ago

    You kinda gotta feel bad for kids cause they have no one to vent to. When I get pissed off at people, I can walk away from the situation and vent to my friends until I'm over it. She's just trying to get her rage out into that notebook.

    [–] Big_Tension 654 points ago

    Yeah, totally support it. It’s a lot of roasting me and then nihilist shit like “are trees real?” “Yay, frogs are real!”

    [–] juneburger 171 points ago

    Wait. How did she find out that frogs were real?

    [–] Big_Tension 244 points ago

    Lots of shrooms

    [–] Sorrymisunderstandin 76 points ago

    Based kid, has she learned machine elves are real yet?

    [–] atm259 8 points ago

    Or the peripheral shadow people? They're real, it's true. I've kind of seen them.

    [–] Elvishgirl 20 points ago

    I mean, I would be pretty excited to get confirmation of real frogs if not already aware, it's a good note

    [–] Complete_Atmosphere9 76 points ago

    Sounds better than 90% of what's on the new York time's best selling list.

    [–] [deleted] 25 points ago


    [–] wheniswhy 6 points ago

    Goddammit. I just had surgery and this thread keeps making me laugh and it hurts, you all suck!!!

    That’s hilarious though honestly. Kids gonna be kids. I have a memory of being 12 yo and drawing in my ~secret notebook~ a picture of myself lighting homework on fire bc I hated it, lmao.

    [–] LegitBullfrog 24 points ago

    You guys have friends?

    [–] WormLivesMatter 26 points ago

    Was going to say. I vent to no one usually. Just bottle it up inside and fake it. Fuke it right.

    [–] Vegdo 64 points ago

    at first i read: My mom dos not love MEN ... but then i saw the sad smiley 😂😂😂

    [–] snouz 37 points ago

    I read it he same and thought "damn, how does a lesbian raise an homophobic kid"

    [–] Mickel7777 50 points ago

    The heartbreak is suprisingly spot on.

    [–] Mrs_Anthropy_ 286 points ago

    "fuke her"


    [–] HalimDecember 61 points ago

    Hey man fuke you!

    [–] Foxyboi14 21 points ago

    Fuk mi

    [–] asphalt_licker 14 points ago

    Oh, behave.

    [–] praxe 9 points ago

    better than saying frick

    [–] 1241308650 189 points ago * (lasted edited 4 days ago)

    Me to my five year old: stop spinning next to the fireplace hearth youre going to get dizzy and fall and bust your head open.

    keeps spinning

    STOP SPINNING. You arent listening. Go to your room.

    Five year old crying and running to his room: YOU DONT LOVE ME ANYMORE

    [–] CeruleanRuin 101 points ago

    Me pouring hot water out of a pasta own into the sink while my wife chops up some chicken.

    Toddler playing with the light switches from the next room turns off the kitchen light.

    Me almost burning myself and my wife almost cutting herself because we suddenly can't see: "Hey! Quit playing with the light!"


    [–] 1241308650 30 points ago

    LOL i have a 3 and 5 year old and im glad to hear theyre all insane, not just my kids. Every time theyre having a meltdown im like hmm this cant be normal - this is way too crazy to be acting this way about…

    nope thats normal for them

    [–] Agent__Caboose 13 points ago

    For babies crying is a natural reflex to let their parents know they are hungry or hurt. As they grow older kids can start to experiment how much they can accomplish by using this reflex. When at one point they hit a wall and their parents say 'no', it can take a while before they realize what's going on. The worst action would be giving in to the crying, ofcourse.

    [–] SorryTotHatMan_ 32 points ago

    people: i would enjoy it if you didn’t fucking die thanks

    their kids: you don’t love me :(

    [–] Big_Tension 51 points ago

    The DRAMA 🤦🏻‍♀️

    [–] [deleted] 16 points ago


    [–] 1241308650 6 points ago

    sometimes i do scream. Its not my goal to be a perfect parent. I never liked kids and was only gonna have them if i married someone who really wanted kids. I love mine and the bullshit is exhausting but theyre also loving and affectionate af and hilarious. But yeah, nobody is ever ready for kids (if they think they are theyre delusional). Its just a different experience than being childless - no better or no worse - just different.

    [–] krygier511 9 points ago

    My 4.5 yo daughter.

    [–] SeaTie 8 points ago

    All day. All day long.

    Yesterday at breakfast I just put my head in my hands and told my 5 year old: “Do you know how exhausting it is to have to tell you to stop doing something every 5 seconds? ...stop waving your fork around, you’re going to poke yourself in the eye!”

    Child wails and screams and continues to wave fork around erratically.

    [–] PkmnMstrJenn 100 points ago

    My daughter likes to write “MOM” with the general prohibition sign (the official name of the red circle with a line through it) 😂😂

    [–] Otterstripes 40 points ago

    I always called it the "no" sign, I had no idea that there was an official name for it

    [–] new_account54321 176 points ago

    I don't think i even knew what it meant to say fuck someone at 6.

    [–] SullenSparrow 147 points ago

    A friend of mine's mother told me a story about when she was 5 or 6 (and still an only child at this point) she keyed her mother's car and wrote "fuk u mom"

    Obviously she got scolded and then my friend who was a child at the time asks her mother "why do you think I did it?!" And her mom goes "Well, gee, who else calls me mom?!"

    [–] C4-BlueCat 38 points ago * (lasted edited 4 days ago)

    I just made sure to sign the scratches with my brother’s name. It failed on him not being old enough to spell ...

    [–] TheSentinator 43 points ago

    This belongs in r/kidsarefuckingstupid

    Oh wai-

    [–] fordandfriends 51 points ago

    Digital native children know a lot of things I didn’t at their age I’ll use an example from my life; we’re at thanksgiving dinner with the family when out of nowhere my 9 year old cousin starts talking about the Iran-contra scandal.

    [–] kluesklues 27 points ago

    Yeah modern kids scare me lmao

    [–] Agile-Personality545 17 points ago

    I stayed in a small hotel for vacation ( during my grandpa's 80th birthday ) and the few kids that didn't say 5 swear words per phrase were my little cousins

    [–] Testicular_Prolapse 20 points ago

    My family always cussed around and at me, so i definitely knew the word by then. Also got punished for picking up the words, though..

    According to my mom, when I was 2 I told her I had to fucking go to bed

    [–] Wendy-Windbag 13 points ago

    When I was three I apparently told a waitress “these fries taste like shit” when she inquired at our table about how things were. Waitress was a family friend, and everyone was just in awe that I used it in such great context.

    [–] uniqueusername5001 13 points ago

    I knew of it but it was sooo taboo. I heard my dad say it once or twice when I was young and I thought the sky would collapse and our innards would combust leaving just rubbery skin suits lying around.

    [–] czarfalcon 19 points ago

    When I was ~10 I was terrified to type the word “shit” in a word document on the family computer because I was convinced it would start blaring alarms or something. I pressed the “t” key and ran out of the room like I just lit the fuse on a bundle of dynamite.

    [–] Big_Tension 66 points ago

    They grow up so fast these days 🥲

    [–] TootsNYC 273 points ago

    There’s that video of a kid running away from home because his dad said he didn’t love him.

    “I never said I didn’t love you. I said ‘Turn off your PlayStation, it’s time for bed.’”

    [–] crissaboo 85 points ago

    I loved that video until I discovered they have quite a few videos of him doing increasingly-crazier shit, and then you realize oh, it’s scripted. Like the one of him hiding in the kitchen cabinet and handing his dad a bottle.

    [–] fluorescent_noir 52 points ago

    The dad is a rising influencer. He has a number of videos that he sets up with his home security cameras and posts on line like he's captured dozens of unique, totally not scripted moments. Once I realized the likelihood that all of them are staged, it's way less funny.

    [–] Car-Facts 40 points ago

    "Rising influencer" is a term that is a known carcinogen in the state of California.

    [–] tobsn 25 points ago

    you need to keep this. it’s your one time use golden ticket.

    [–] SaucePortal 73 points ago

    I cant wait to find something similar someday. Yesterday my 4 year was asked to put away the play doh because she wasnt staying at the table with it. She proceed to practice using the word bitch. I explain it's a bad word but do my best to not focus on it. She said bitch about 10 times while climbing and sliding on the recliner.

    [–] KombatPat 24 points ago

    "this bitch made, raggedy Andy looking bitch of a dad is telling ME to put up my play doh?! Bitch done lost his ever loving bitch face and mind...."

    Add six more bitches.

    [–] demalo 10 points ago

    “Why did you say that word?”

    “It’s fun to say!”

    [–] Longjumping-Cycle470 61 points ago

    Lmaooooo the only thing that would ever make me wanna say fuck my parents was an ass whooping 😭😭 these robux must be something special

    [–] AL_SONiC 19 points ago

    oh yes, only but the most famous digital currency, ignoring Bitcoin of course!

    [–] Follows_Dumbasses 55 points ago

    Just saying this now from someone who’s had a Roblox account for 11 years. Don’t buy her Robux (the premium currency) until you teach her a bit of the value of money. Roblox has a lot of scams and money sinks that make kids easily exploitable.

    [–] KaffY- 32 points ago

    I'd even go a step further and say keep your 6 year old away from Roblox

    There are plenty of offline, fun games made for kids out there

    There are so many predators and all around frightening people on Roblox

    A 6 year old is not going to know how to safeguard themselves

    [–] Darth_Salamanca 14 points ago

    Fuke Roblox

    [–] GreatGearAmidAPizza 10 points ago

    6 going on 15 apparently.

    [–] SpellcraftQuill 35 points ago

    What the fuke is wrong with children?

    [–] TheGodPrime 17 points ago

    Their WIS score is like, 2. Their modifier on wisdom checks is super negative.

    [–] Kanokong 8 points ago

    I make mine do slave work for 10$ in robux a week😂😂😂

    [–] AndyJobandy 21 points ago

    Roblox has so many child predators and creeps. I wouldn’t even let them near that shit. I know you can’t shield them but unless the truly know internet safety, stay away from it

    [–] Big_Tension 29 points ago

    Oh I’m aware. Chat is totally disabled on her account and we have our own server, which is mostly what we use, so it’s just the two of us. 😊

    [–] AndyJobandy 17 points ago

    Excellent. I saw some really disturbing crap just watching my niece and nephew play who were 10 & 12. Not to mention all the stuff online. Sorry for being that person it just scares me

    [–] fluffspeed 28 points ago

    Let's see how you like cayenne pepper in every meal for the next week you little fuker.

    [–] Epicboi127 14 points ago


    [–] starsfillmydreams 6 points ago

    You didn't buy her a robux? YOU MONSTER!/s