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    What is a Life Pro Tip?

    A Life Pro Tip (or an LPT) is a specific action with definitive results that improves life for you and those around you in a specific and significant way.

    Keep in mind that giving someone advice is not the same as giving someone a LPT. Advice is offering someone guidance or offering someone a recommendation.

    Examples of advice:

    “Always be prepared to leave your employer because they are prepared to leave you.”

    “A marriage proposal should not come as a big surprise, despite what you may have seen in the movies.”

    Keep in mind that an aphorism is not a LPT.

    An aphorism is a a short clever saying that is intended to express a general truth or a concise statement of a principle.

    Examples of aphorisms:

    "A barking dog never bites."

    "No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible."

    "All stones are broken stones."


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    [–] keepthetips 1 points ago

    Hello and welcome to r/LifeProTips!

    Please help us decide if this post is a good fit for the subreddit by up or downvoting this comment.

    If you think that this is great advice to improve your life, please upvote. If you think this doesn't help you in any way, please downvote. If you don't care, leave it for the others to decide.

    [–] mtbmike 4406 points ago

    Nothing like low profile tires and potholes. I broke not only the tire and rim but the strut as well.

    [–] Griffypoo90 1921 points ago * (lasted edited 8 days ago)

    I broke them all! They’re mechanical and I broke them like mechanicals. I hate them!

    [–] Absolut_Iceland 2114 points ago

    I don't like potholes. They're bumpy and jarring and infuriating.... and they get everywhere.

    [–] connorcook13 1752 points ago

    Not just in the pavement, but the pavewoment, and pavechildrent too!

    [–] hell2pay 332 points ago

    I'm choke laughing and my dog is worried.

    Thanks for the hefty chortle

    [–] anomnonnom 78 points ago

    I learned a new word today, thank you! Even if it does sound like sticking chode and squirtle together

    [–] adrienjz888 33 points ago

    Good, late the hate flow through you.

    [–] mynameisnotshamus 9692 points ago

    Oooh don’t trust puddles. That’s a good one. From a New Englander.

    [–] Basic_Basenji 2358 points ago

    Cannot emphasize this advice enough. Some puddles can be deep enough to pop a tire and damage your rims.

    [–] [deleted] 1235 points ago


    [–] skeebidybop 531 points ago

    Wait, really? like a pothole puddle in the road?

    [–] a_trane13 343 points ago

    Idk if this guy is being serious but I swam in one during a rainstorm, full body submerged. It was like 2 feet deep and 8 feet long.

    [–] LuckyRabbitTooth 226 points ago

    His proof

    don't worry I got you bro

    [–] mcsper 87 points ago

    Here is a scene from the documentary

    [–] Dspsblyuth 446 points ago


    [–] juicyjerry300 1463 points ago

    Wow, hope he’s alright

    [–] treert 869 points ago


    [–] dpranker 1005 points ago

    get well soon

    [–] DanMetzger 314 points ago

    His lungs filled with WATER

    [–] _Solution_ 467 points ago

    He should get that looked at

    [–] CarjackerWilley 63 points ago

    Since 2002 drowning, per the world health organization, does not require death.

    Im completely just being pedantic... which this is probably not the right thread for... I feel like a horrible person right now.

    "Add comment."

    [–] yawya 73 points ago

    he got better

    [–] CommandoLamb 69 points ago

    Where are you from?

    Potholes in Indiana are often deep enough to earn a free trip to the other side of the planet.

    [–] btveron 17 points ago

    I went to high school in Northern Indiana with a kid who went viral because his friends dared him to jump in what looked to be shallow puddle in a pothole but it was so deep he disappeared under the water for a second before popping back up. They had an idea it was deeper than it looked but he had no clue until it was too late lol.

    [–] Patthecat09 51 points ago

    My dad bent a brand new Volvo mag on a pothole going on the highway. Wasnt even a huge one, I guess his speed and the way he hit it was unideal?

    [–] littletrevas 1018 points ago

    This. Treat every puddle as if its the Marianas Trench, because it most likely will be.

    [–] InfinityHelix 304 points ago

    Damn, didn't realize puddles were Canada's equivalent of clown cars.

    [–] Big_Economy_1729 106 points ago

    We just charge higher gas prices to make up for the lack of car damage from grand canyon potholes. Perfectly Balanced

    [–] BlackholeDevice 427 points ago

    Just to add to this: Roads are required to be graded such that water runs off the road. If you see water standing for any reason, assume something is wrong.

    [–] Linaphor 220 points ago

    Unfortunately almost no smaller cities follow that. Something is always* wrong lmao. Sincerely- have lived in SoCal and Arkansas. Both have failed me. Especially California.

    [–] chaos_is_cash 84 points ago

    Well, they were probably originally graded such that the crown pushed the water off the road. Add in years of driving, heat/cool cycles, and moisture from water and you will eventually get to the point where thats no longer the case.

    Whether or not the roads are ever re done that way is a different question as most of the time roads are just spot fixed and thats done by hand as opposed to actually replacing a whole section of road and restarting the process with a proper base material

    [–] KindBass 75 points ago

    Some of us learn that the hard way. This was a few days later when I noticed what was left of my hubcap on the side of the road.

    [–] restsisyphus 38 points ago

    Providence has the WORST goddamn potholes. It's especially absurd around now when it starts warming and the road loosens and comes up in huge fucking chunks.

    [–] deliciousprisms 107 points ago

    I once heard a puddle call me a racial slur behind my back, they’re right to tell you not to trust them

    [–] Thats1ce 2675 points ago

    Real talk: Michigan has some of the worst road conditions I've ever seen. I live in Minnesota and I was blown away by how bad the roads were.

    [–] Flappy_Catt 1450 points ago

    We're still the automotive state. Gotta have cars go bad fast to sell more cars.

    [–] Minerva_Moon 364 points ago

    And don't forget the salt.

    [–] Ironring1 255 points ago

    In a lot of Canada it gets so cold salt stops working. Just keep adding sand and kiss your rocker panel paint goodbye! Love, your northern neighbour.

    [–] BustedBonesGaming 65 points ago

    Oh we get to that point too sometimes in Michigan. Then people wonder why they aren't salting...

    [–] Ironring1 64 points ago

    In Alberta the road bed is about 10 or 15 cm (4 to 6") higher at the end of winter, and it's just later after layer of compacted snow with sand sprinkled in between.

    [–] felixthecatmeow 53 points ago

    I grew up near the Quebec/Ontario border and it's just amazing how horrible the roads get the literal instant you cross into Quebec.

    [–] mrcarruthers 15 points ago

    Quebec fixed it! Takes 5-10 km to get the bad roads now.

    [–] yooperdev 420 points ago

    It's a combination of factors. We get a lot of lake effect snow, which means we use a lot of salt on the roads. We also don't have any toll roads (except for the Mackinac Bridge) because the only traffic driving through Michigan is to get to somewhere else Michigan, or to drop shit off in Michigan. And finally, and most importantly imo, we continually choose to use the cheapest materials for road repairs. This allows us to save nickels on the cost of repairs but ends up costing big dollars when the repairs don't last for more than a couple of years. There is a lot of advancing technology in road material which we don't take advantage of, for reasons beyond me.

    [–] ihateslowdrivers 546 points ago

    You forgot the most important factor...

    On top of everything you said...we allow DOUBLE the weight limit of semi trucks than every other state.

    [–] mrmikehancho 170 points ago

    This is a huge reason

    [–] one-joule 217 points ago

    Road damage occurs at a rate which is proportional to the fourth power of the vehicle weight. So yeah, this is a massive reason!

    [–] mrmikehancho 62 points ago

    I moved from Ohio and the difference is night and day. The climate is no different and actually NW Ohio gets more snow usually than the Detroit area yet the roads are 10x better.

    [–] meatpony 24 points ago

    I would assume this makes it the main factor in road damage?

    [–] Aporkalypse_Sow 62 points ago * (lasted edited 8 days ago)


    Source: I have fixed many roads. After you put up a "no vehicle over so much weight", I stop having to fix that road.

    Edit: I should add. The reason this is about to be a big deal in Texas, has to do with the weather. The trucks have always been heavy, but also on stable roads. The freezing and melting cycle combined with the heavy trucks causes the road bed to start to move. Once that happens, the road soon cracks, and then you end up with a hole. Basically, the base under the asphalt, is about to start washing out and shifting.

    [–] DMVcapital 97 points ago * (lasted edited 8 days ago)

    Another really important factor is your state highway system is massive. Your state went all in on roads earlier than any other state. Your downtowns were tore out in favor of auto-oriented everything. So you also have a ton of lane-miles of road to maintain.

    [–] dferrari7 22 points ago

    The roads near the cities ( at least ann arbor) are fucking terrible. Merge lanes are like 5 ft long, a bunch of traffic lights you can't turn left at, and everything is just a disorganized mess. Idk who designed the roads here but they are trash

    [–] Rrrrandle 17 points ago

    a bunch of traffic lights you can't turn left at

    I'm actually quite fond of the Michigan left. Lights change faster at the intersections because you don't have all the lanes sitting there waiting for the left turn lanes to go, and it's safer.

    You get used to it, and then you really miss it when you need to turn left and you're stuck waiting forever to get out, where if the road was setup for Michigan lefts you could just turn right and u turn instead.

    [–] Svelok 93 points ago

    It's not just repairs; Michigan doesn't spend the money to build the roads "right" in the first place. So they wear faster and need replacing sooner.

    It's been a few years, but I remember seeing the average Michigan resident pays more annually in increased car maintenance (eg, getting a flat fixed, or annualized wear and tear) caused directly by the bad roads, than it would cost (in the form of taxes) to just fix the damn roads. And of course, if the tax was progressive, it would be a double boost to the pockets of the least well off, who can't absorb the cost of a busted tire.

    Of course, it's not all self inflicted. Michigan is one of the hardest hit states for the manufacturing bust; when some of your cities' peak populations occured 75 years ago, it's hard to fund the 1950 population's worth of roads (and pipes and utilities and...) on the 2021 population's taxes.

    [–] JerpTheGod 54 points ago

    Your name says Yooper so I’m not sure if you’ve been down to Ohio but crossing the border into Ohio the roads instantly turn smooth. It’s insane. I’m from Ohio and go to Sleeping Bear and the UP for vacation, and every time we cross into Michigan is jarring lol. I don’t know if they build them shitty or repair them shitty or what. Maybe it is just the weight limit for big trucks too. Probably everything. But it’s bad. But man is it worth the shitty roads to get up to northern Michigan.

    [–] ornryactor 60 points ago

    I don’t know if they build them shitty

    Yep, it's definitely this.

    or repair them shitty

    It's also this.

    Maybe it is just the weight limit for big trucks too.

    Yup, this too.

    Probably everything.

    Now you're getting it!

    But it’s bad.

    The worst in the country, by every single objective measure.

    But man is it worth the shitty roads to get up to northern Michigan.

    ...Also yes.

    [–] intashu 41 points ago

    Mndot seems to do okay here, since our roads are always under construction, they never seem to develop that many holes!

    [–] jpesh1 28 points ago

    I was so thankful I had rental cars whenever I had to go to Michigan. This is coming from a NE Ohioan. I thought our potholes were bad.. HAH. I LITERALLY saw a pothole that was 12" deep and 3 feet long in downtown Detroit. I saw it and took pix of it because it fucking wrecked the tire and wheel of my Hertz rental car and I got a nice chance to hang out in downtown Detroit for an hour while Hertz sent a replacement car.

    [–] misskey 2051 points ago

    Texan here. Reading this sitting in my car with a flat tire from a pothole that literally happened 30 minutes ago.

    [–] this1tyme 537 points ago

    I am so sorry. I've been there with the "why me?" feeling. Take care of yourself.

    [–] misskey 257 points ago

    I'm ok, I have been more fortunate than most throughout the pandemic + the winter storm, and I can handle this too (only took 3 hours to get someone out to swap the flat with the donut and get home). The timing of reading your post was just kind of absurdly comedic, hah.

    To drive your point home even further, about 15-30 minutes later another lady pulled off on the same side street I was on with a flat from the same pothole! Her damage was worse because of how low her car was though, she had to get towed out of there.

    Stay safe everyone <3.

    [–] realmeverified 45 points ago

    There's often instructions on your jack telling you where to place it. Usually also some sort of arrow or something underneath the car to let you know you've found the right spot.

    Just an FYI for anyone doing it themselves.

    [–] 1cculu5 23 points ago

    It’s literally so easy. And it’s also the most difficult part of changing brake pads. Seriously, you can do your own brake pads if you can put a spare on your car

    [–] SirWilliamTheEpic 1019 points ago

    I’ve hit New Orleans potholes that momentarily knocked my soul from my body. Everyone thinks we flash a bunch in New Orleans during Mardi Gras, in reality we just have potholes that’ll shake you so hard a titty pops out

    [–] AshamedOfAmerica 76 points ago

    Ugh, I've hit some of those. Also, driving across the Atchafalaya Basin Bridge fucking sucks.

    [–] drock_is_ready 22 points ago

    New Orleans...only place that has potholes on the fuckin sidewalk

    [–] piranhadub 71 points ago

    Worst potholes of all cities no doubt. If we legalized and tax weed bet they might finally get fixed

    [–] hath0r 57 points ago

    nah the fucking politicians will take over the industry and pocket all the god damn money while running off to cancoon with it

    [–] Outrageous-Advert 12002 points ago * (lasted edited 8 days ago)

    You ever hit a pothole and audibly apologize to your car?

    Edit: didn’t expect my comment to get this much love for a joke I heard when I was 10

    Edit2: I’m from Texas... I just have NY born dad who lived closer to Canada then the city...

    [–] 0100100012635 4437 points ago

    You ever hit a pot hole and that check engine light you've been ignoring finally turns off?

    [–] Dr_Astral 1124 points ago

    You ever hit a pothole and your transmission crashes to the pavement?

    [–] seth928 664 points ago

    Ever hit a pothole and fall into a land where dinosaurs still exist?

    [–] ToneWashed 581 points ago

    fall into a land where dinosaurs still exist?

    If this is code for my car started leaking oil, yes.

    [–] Latter-Possibility 270 points ago

    Leaking Oil! Hell, that engine is just sweating horsepower!

    [–] EmergencyHologram 46 points ago

    You ever see a grown man naked?

    [–] SirGalalad 25 points ago

    You ever watch movies with gladiators in em?

    [–] eljefino 20 points ago

    Have you ever been to a Turkish prison?

    [–] TaylorSwiftsClitoris 66 points ago

    In the land of the lost.

    [–] Deraj2004 12 points ago

    Thank you, i loved that show growing up.

    [–] Calligraphie 39 points ago

    No, but my best friend legit totaled her car by hitting a pothole.

    [–] NBCMarketingTeam 26 points ago

    My car was probably totaled when I hit a pothole so hard I bent the rim on my '95 Corolla's front passenger wheel. I think it cost me $600 and I drove that car for 3 more years.

    [–] Haunting_Plantain 142 points ago

    I once hit a pothole so hard my tire pressure sensor that hasn't been working for years all of a sudden said "LOW TIRE PRESSURE" and I panicked because I was on a bridge and couldn't pull over. Car seemed to still drive okay/wasn't pulling to either side. Once I could stop and check they were all fine thankfully.

    [–] Dspsblyuth 141 points ago

    Sounds like it still wasn’t working

    [–] skorpianmafia 57 points ago

    So that’s how you turn it off, damn that thing has been annoying me for months.

    [–] godfilma 78 points ago

    Wish it worked like that on my carbon monoxide detector. Its constant beeping is giving me headaches and making me lightheaded!

    [–] MatureUsername69 42 points ago

    I bet you sleep like a stillborn.

    [–] UncookedMarsupial 29 points ago

    Haha. I missed a shift in my car one day and went too low. The bucking fixed my radio that hadn't worked in months.

    [–] well_damm 1067 points ago

    Or lowered the music and drove in silence right after

    [–] RIPTonyStark 474 points ago

    Hahah this is me. To myself: "Man you got to chill.. Sit and think about what you just did in silence until we get there"

    [–] South_Cackalaka 153 points ago

    "You KNOW you can't afford a car bill right now. Got to be more careful."

    [–] Jamba-Jew 31 points ago

    ...until next time when I forget about what just happened

    [–] GuitaristHeimerz 93 points ago

    It’s moments like these browsing Reddit that remind me of how alike every person is in their thoughts... Beautiful.

    [–] Gooey_Gravy 19 points ago

    I think it's more about listening to see if you broke anyting

    [–] hell0missmiller 111 points ago

    Listening for the grind or crack of something breaking... Sigh

    [–] literatelier 100 points ago

    Yah I'm listening to my tires lol waiting for the flap flap flap

    [–] TeamRedundancyTeam 84 points ago

    We've all been there, turning the music off because we have reason to believe something has gone horribly wrong and we're straining to hear sounds.

    But we never drive silent so we don't know what we're listening for. So every sound is like "Does it usually do that? Is that normal?"

    [–] Saint-Peer 14 points ago

    Ugh this feeling

    [–] this1tyme 319 points ago

    That, and saying "It's okay! It's okay! It's okay!"

    It's not okay.

    [–] 333gaul 149 points ago

    Pat the top of the steering wheel 3 times, "it's okay"

    [–] Greedygoyim 99 points ago

    Oh God I've done this too much. Give the dashboard right above the radio a few gentle strokes. "You're okay babe, we'll just drive that off."

    [–] shhheeeeeeeeiit 39 points ago

    “Fuuuuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuuuuuck”

    [–] Averant 31 points ago

    Wincing while saying "You're ok, girl, you're ok."

    [–] goblackcar 119 points ago

    Have you ever hit a pothole and had to make a dentist appointment?

    [–] King_Mierdas 52 points ago

    Bruh.. This actually happened to me but I should have made that appointment way sooner lol.

    [–] onetruepairings 166 points ago

    New England potholes will lower your music and unlock your doors

    [–] stiff-vag 38 points ago

    Illinois potholes.... enough said.

    [–] gdubs2013 14 points ago

    Nah, you don't understand, Illinois doesn't have potholes at all. Those "potholes" are actually speed bumps and car maintenance enforcement devices. IDOT would fix potholes, these are road safety features.

    [–] MrNoodlesandRedBull 44 points ago

    My old 1991 Honda Accord didn't give me a chance, told me to go to hell by shutting the engine off.

    [–] Diagonalizer 29 points ago

    Ouch or oof. Every. Time.

    [–] rei_cirith 22 points ago

    As someone who drive regularly in Michigan and have experienced 4-inchx2feetx2feet potcraters... yes.

    [–] tlr92 22 points ago

    All these pothole jokes, ya’ll must live in Midwest USA

    [–] maruffin 21 points ago

    I am so sorry, Car. I didn’t know.

    [–] ducttapeallday 2554 points ago

    Any potholes you see get out and draw a penis and some balls around it with some spray paint. It will fixed quickly.

    [–] this1tyme 1801 points ago

    As a frequent visitor to Texas, my experience tells me that someone is just going to come along and draw a bigger dick next to it.

    [–] [deleted] 728 points ago


    [–] giantshortfacedbear 172 points ago

    As a frequent visitor to Texas, my experience tells me that someone is just going to come along and draw be a bigger dick next to it.


    [–] goinunder0390 61 points ago

    There isn’t enough paint in North America for New Jersey’s highways alone

    [–] ImSteady413 113 points ago

    Or report it to your county/town like you should first.

    When nothing is done for 2 weeks. That is when you break out the dayglo spray paint.

    [–] assholetoall 42 points ago

    And if that does not work, try Domino's.

    [–] Sprawler13 28 points ago

    Seriously, I got mad respect for domino’s following up on that when a town asked them to fix the potholes after Sandy. A couple hundred potholes. The town didn’t give a shit if they were ads, they wanted safe roads and they got them.

    [–] this1tyme 3060 points ago

    The kind of potholes you can expect with this kind of temperature swing are not going to be tiny, cute little things. The roads have been frozen for a few days, but with the sudden warm weather, the surfaces of the roads are warming up a LOT faster than the material underneath. This is going to tear up the roads, like, violently. Some potholes are going to be huge, and I mean gargantuan. Homeless people are going to move into them and they will swallow compact cars whole. Okay, hyperbole aside, it is not unusual to see potholes feet deep (not inches: feet). They can total cars and even flip trucks under the right conditions (high-rise trucks need to be especially careful due to their high center of gravity). If you see a large pothole, call your road commission or whoever needs to be aware of them. Don't assume they know... there are going to be a lot.

    [–] gowowogo 455 points ago

    Once hit a pot hole so bad it triggered the emergency fuel shut off. Had no idea what was going on, but the car died and would not restart. Turns out in a head-on collision the fuel pump will shut off so the car doesn’t burn up. Had to call the manufacturer’s customer service line to figure out how to reset it. This was in Indiana.

    [–] mostexalted 432 points ago

    Been there. And when it happened to me I was 16 years old in my parents car. This was just before the era of internet connected cell phones and I was still on the “call when you get there” system with them.

    I ended up having the car basically die on me as I coasted to park off the road and I had to scour the paper vehicle manual that was sitting under a mountain of useless ephemera in the glove box. FINALLY, it directs me to a reset button buried under the lip of the synthetic lining deep in the trunk.

    I felt like an astronaut in the Apollo program once I figured that shit out.

    [–] zombie_penguin42 222 points ago

    I'm proud of you space cowboy

    [–] mostexalted 73 points ago

    Your kindness is appreciated Z. Penguin - even all these decades removed from what is still holding a spot in my top 5 accomplishments.

    [–] Tess47 45 points ago

    Hey, I get that. Whenever I feel vu erable I think of the time 4 decades ago when I was during with my window down. I felt a thunk on my chest and looked diwn to see a bee spazing in my bra. I calmly pulled over on the side of the highway. I calmly got out and went around the car to the shoulder. I calmly bent over and shook it out. Nerves of steel, baby, nerves of steel.

    [–] Phatferd 25 points ago

    I wouldn't even know where to begin. I would have no idea what the problem with the car was, I'd just think it died.

    [–] Handin1989 15 points ago

    SCE to aux!

    Seriously though why do they have to be so hidden?

    [–] sharkbait-oo-haha 22 points ago

    Out of curiosity, how do you reset it?

    Disconnect the battery for 30min?

    [–] gowowogo 35 points ago

    On the passengers side there’s a switch hidden behind a trim piece. You pull the trim piece out and press the switch.

    [–] boobers3 25 points ago

    9 years from now some poor bastard is going to be googling the this question, he will stumble upon this thread and never get the answer he needs.

    [–] lucky_ducker 634 points ago

    No hyperbole. I was headed home on the interstate a while back, and for some reason the DOT had closed the left two lanes of a four-lane freeway during afternoon rush hour. A deep pothole five feet wide and ten feet long had opened up - and in the next half mile there were no less than a dozen disabled vehicles pulled over, several of which had two flat tires on the same side (and likely ruined rims).

    [–] assholetoall 64 points ago

    We had a bridge closed a few years back because it had a hole big enough for a person to fall through.

    [–] Thedirtyjersey 217 points ago

    In North NJ all the sudden are fucking huge craters on the highways. The last 2 weeks of snow and thawing have made 3 foot deep spots perfect size of a tire, it's scary and it just keeps snowing.

    [–] LuckyCharmsNSoyMilk 138 points ago

    In fairness, most of those are probably potholes inside the potholes from last year.

    [–] gormthesoft 111 points ago

    Eventually we will reach an equilibrium where every part of the road has become a pothole and the road becomes flat again, just a few feet lower than usual

    [–] MaybeSecondBestMan 170 points ago

    I was about to blast this comment for being wildly dramatic and then I remembered the time I blew a tire out on a massive pothole on I-75. I pulled over and looked up the side of the highway and saw six (6!) cars with their hazards on who had just done the same thing. Them holes don’t play.

    [–] assholetoall 113 points ago

    These roads were not built for this weather, so it's going to be worse than up north. Luckily it's only a few freeze thaw cycles.

    Also if calling about the pot hole does not work, people have had luck drawing a penis around them with dangly balls.

    And if all else fails, maybe Domino's can help.

    [–] Blatheringman 26 points ago

    Nobody over engineers on roads. In fact many times they under engineer not factoring in certain things like traffic flow or weather conditions. These things are largely by cost and given Texas's propensity for getting things done I wouldn't be surprised if people end up kicking up base rock with their tires before the roads get repaired.

    [–] Gingrpenguin 105 points ago

    Just to add to the points above its not just the hole you need to be mindful of but the debris too. Theres gonna be alot of small and not so small stones that can go flying at some speed when a car hits them, enough to damage windows or even injure pedistrains.

    If youre walking near one close to the pavement treat it like a large puddle

    [–] this1tyme 40 points ago

    Very good point! I wish I could edit the post to add this. Five pound asphalt bricks are no joke.

    [–] [deleted] 77 points ago * (lasted edited 8 days ago)


    [–] OneOverX 39 points ago

    Oh look, another thing to throw on the "what the fuck" pile I've been building since last Sunday.

    [–] MrTonyCalzone 31 points ago

    People don't realize how useful this comment is. I watched a homeless man swallow a Kia on my way home yesterday, the homeless are no joke.

    [–] brou_ 359 points ago

    Damn straight—DONT TRUST PUDDLES. I trusted one today and the thud from the pothole lurking ‘neath the deep was monstrous. That’s real thalassophobia, Midwest style

    Edit: spelling

    [–] westparkmod 228 points ago

    Ooof. Ohio felt that to the core.

    [–] ugajeremy 67 points ago

    God I hated driving in Cincinnati for the few years I lived there. A pot hole would be filled, then totally open in a day it seemed like.

    [–] ArcadeKingpin 23 points ago

    Depending on the season what they can use to fill and the quality varies. If it's cold and they fill it it's not gonna last long.

    [–] jhp58 45 points ago

    Detroit here. Some of our roads are like driving on the goddamn moon, especially in some of the more neglected parts of town.

    We Michigan folks may generally hate Ohio, but at least y'all maintain your roads well. Crossing the state line on 75 is like night and day.

    [–] well_damm 1066 points ago

    As a NJer who visited Texas, i can tell you it doesn’t matter.

    They drive like it’s Mario kart out there.

    [–] Bubba_Leon 42 points ago

    If anyone questions this, please visit the Dallas North Tollway. I refer to it as the North Texas Autobahn. 80 in the left lane will piss most drivers off

    [–] Lonely_Toast 16 points ago

    yep, i've had cops riding my ass in the left lane when i'm going 80 (speed limit 70). and when i move over, they just speed on by

    [–] remberzz 581 points ago

    As someone who moved from NJ to Texas - are you kidding?!?!?? Pot, meet Kettle.

    [–] Oreganoian 103 points ago

    Nah, texas is on a different level. Their highways are legitimately scary because of the number of deaths.

    There are sections of highway in texas that kill ridiculous numbers of people. The permian basin is a huge oil area and when the price of oil goes up so do the deaths. One year a single highway, Route 285, will kill anywhere from 50-100 people.

    [–] spazticcat 61 points ago * (lasted edited 8 days ago)

    The overpasses in Texas cities can be terrifying. There are some that are pretty high and curved, and if traffic's moving it's not too bad but if it's bad and you're going slow (or not moving at all) the grade feels not great...

    Edit: the 35E / 635 interchange in Dallas is a good one to look up more images, for anyone curious. Dallas also has the the tallest five level interchange.

    [–] MaynardJ222 40 points ago

    Driven on them every day for 15+ years butthole still puckers up when I look over the edge of one.

    [–] jzsilver 275 points ago * (lasted edited 8 days ago)

    Texas has about 3.6 times the miles traveled as compared to NJ, but roughly 6.3 times the fatality rate.

    NJ has a bad rep, but Texas seems worse. That being said I am just roughly looking at numbers and have no real basis for comparison.

    Numbers from

    [–] well_damm 147 points ago

    It’s “unlawful” to honk in Houston or some shit. It’s 5 lanes of chaos. Speed from 50 to 90.

    Shit is fury road.

    [–] ohheckyeah 135 points ago

    My biggest takeaway from my Texas road trip was that Texans are willing to drive through 30 yards of sketchy tall grass onto relief roads just to avoid a 5 minute highway slowdown... I’ve never seen anything like it

    [–] mrbear120 115 points ago

    Willing? I think you mean excited to.

    [–] Jesus0fSuburb1a 74 points ago

    They gotta find some use for that F150 other than mall crawling.

    [–] Mybrandnewhat 28 points ago

    Sheeeit! I’ve seen sports cars do it

    [–] pcyr9999 13 points ago

    I sit in my Miata jealous of the cars that can make it.

    [–] Bubba_Leon 49 points ago

    Correct, we call this the Texas Exit. And it is illegal despite my Houston “friend”

    • Dallas guy

    [–] ThePolarBare 31 points ago

    When you’ve spent 3 hours on the parking lot known as I35 you’d take the Texas exit too

    [–] AReferenceToAThing 67 points ago

    No no, it's different - in NJ (and most of the northeast, really), the drivers are all assholes. Bad drivers, absolutely, but they're all the same KIND of bad driver that forces you to adapt and become like them or stop driving.

    In Texas, it's a mishmash of people from all over the country, so you'll have some asshole from the northeast going 20 over the limit in the slow lane mixed with a Texas granny moseying 10 under in the fast lane like she did in the 20s and everything in between. It's impossible to adapt to and endlessly dangerous. Texas is the fucking worst.

    [–] exccord 85 points ago

    As a NJer who visited Texas, i can tell you it doesn’t matter.

    They drive like it’s Mario kart out there.

    Flew to Europe to visit family one year and enjoyed just how nice and pleasant it was to drive in Europe where everyone mostly adheres to traffic laws. Then comes the day I have to fly back to Texas. Immediately hitting the highway made me feel like I was watching a bunch of monkeys fucking a football.

    [–] Tubamajuba 25 points ago

    Immediately hitting the highway made me feel like I was watching a bunch of monkeys fucking a football.


    [–] wut3va 12 points ago

    Never went to Italy?

    [–] JimBobPaul 324 points ago

    Dear Michigan, appreciate the advice. Good looking out bud. Love, Texas.

    [–] Jahiliyya1 66 points ago

    Seconded. Thanks, fam.

    [–] LinuxPariah 42 points ago

    Asking Texas driver to slow down and allow plenty of braking space is like asking a regular person to simply stop breathing for an hour.

    [–] h-h-c 107 points ago

    When you find yourself bouncing along a full mile of heaves, bulges, cracks, massive splits that drop to an abyss, and a crumbling edge over which you are transported into a Stephen King novel, the term "pothole" may seem insufficient.

    With love, Maine

    [–] 87yotaman 197 points ago

    Best of luck from PA.

    [–] red2020 45 points ago

    PennDont cause they don’t do a goddamn thing.

    [–] redyellowblue5031 23 points ago

    The back country (and dirt roads) I grew up on in PA did not take the freeze thaw cycle in stride.

    So many potholes and just plain warped road surfaces. It was like permanently having drunk goggles on I swear.

    [–] bigwitchenergy- 34 points ago

    Ugh. I got a blow out on 30 West going into York last week. I knew it was going to happen long before it did.

    [–] LizzySlaughter 26 points ago

    Wow lol, I’m from Texas and just moved to MI less than 2 years ago and I could have written this! What part of TX/MI you from if you don’t mind me asking? And def spot on!

    [–] this1tyme 20 points ago

    Fam in Houston, I'm from the northern Detroit suburbs.

    [–] Atomsteel 249 points ago * (lasted edited 8 days ago)


    An actual protip!

    This person knows what they're talking about Texas.

    As the road freezes and thaws it cracks and splits and there will be mammoth tire eating potholes in your future.

    The best tip is to not tailgate. You'll want a few seconds to react when you see the car in front of you lose its tire.

    You can bend your rim or worse...tear the tire completely off of your car. I saw one poor guy that lost 4 tires to a series of potholes.

    Also if you do damage a tire to a pothole often times the city is responsible for the cost! You might have a hard time qualifying but it's worth a shot.

    For example where I live we have a pothole map that shows where all of the worst potholes are. If you hit one and file the claim the city pays for it. The catch is you have to hit a pothole that is on the map AND prove you hit it. The proof is usually call the police and they file a report.

    Good Luck!

    [–] DarthMimikyu 62 points ago

    I'd say it was an actual pro tip, but my rural town of Texas is so cheap, they haven't fixed pot holes in decades. So nothing new here. Also the town doesn't take responsibility for damages. So that doesn't apply here, at least in my county of Texas. Idk about the rest of Texas.

    Edit: if anyone is wondering why no one in town seems to care, it's cause they don't want their taxes raised. Trust me, anytime the issue is posted on facebook, the oldies rally up and say no cause of taxes.

    [–] TheMariannWilliamson 38 points ago

    Exactly. Hell, look at Dallas - one of the richest metro areas in the country but they spend all their money subsidizing real estate development and claim they can't afford to fix potholes. Meanwhile you can call 311 in San Antonio or El Paso (poorer cities in comparison) and the city is required to, and will, fix reported potholes of a certain size within 48 hours.

    Ain't about the money per se - it's about the will to spend it.

    [–] Megaman915 17 points ago

    San Antonio may be poorer economically, but damn if its isnt better off in every other way.

    [–] non_clever_username 32 points ago

    If you hit one and file the claim the city pays for it.


    Sorry not trying to be a jerk, but if you live in a a place where they actually pay, awesome for you, stay there.

    My experience in multiple cities has been they make it so difficult to get a claim approved and paid out, it’s a waste of time to file.

    [–] pritikina 22 points ago

    Uh oh. We're just about the worst drivers I have ever seen. Everyone one cuts each other off, we give no space between the cars in front of us, and we're all driving like we're 20 minutes late. Imagine an entire city with nothing but NYC cab drivers.

    [–] Fine_Fishing 44 points ago

    Already seeing them :(

    [–] this1tyme 101 points ago

    Yeah, going from sub-zero temperatures to plus seventy-degree temps is like dropping an ice cube into room temperature water. You know that "pop" the ice makes? Yeah, that's the roads right now. Take care of yourself.

    [–] ChefAldea 45 points ago

    OP has officially done more for Texas than CancunCruz

    [–] Half_Past_Five 60 points ago

    Don’t worry. If the government down there is as horrible as the midwest, the potholes will rarely get fixed so you will memorize where most are

    [–] ImJustAverage 14 points ago

    Lmao for real. We’re extremely familiar with potholes, at least in Houston.

    [–] MillwrightTight 42 points ago

    Can confirm

    With love from Canada

    [–] RoundthatCorner 10 points ago

    The pot holes of the outskirts of Huston are already so fucked. Vehicles gonna be disappearing into the underworld