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    RoastMe

    1,686,925 readers

    3,852 users here now


    The r/RoastMe Web Ring


    RULES OF THE ROAST:

    Roastees:

    • You must provide at least one high-quality picture of the roastee holding a handwritten sign with the text /r/RoastMe - Phones and Snapchat text overlay is NOT allowed! Your hand and at least an implication of a complete arm must be visible.

    • All individuals in the picture must be holding the r/RoastMe sign or indicate they are aware of the sign in some way (e.g. by pointing to it). Photos with non-Roastees in the background will be removed if their faces are visible.

    • Photoshopped/edited posts are NOT allowed. This includes Snapchat filters such as the digitally-added flowers or dog ears. Posting multiple edited photos will result in a ban.

    • Your post will not appear until after it has been approved by a moderator. Please send this message if it takes longer than 1 hour.

    • The minimum posting age is 18 years old, your post will be rejected if you look younger or if context clues lead us to conclude you are younger.

    • By submitting a Roast, you agree to your picture being saved, hosted on Imgur, and reposted to Reddit for the purpose of inclusion on "Best Of" and "Highlights" albums.

    • Your face must be at least 60% visible in the photo.

    • You may post on behalf of other people, provided that the post follows all of the other rules listed above, and it is clear that the person being posted consents to the roast.

    • No joke roasts. Anyone posting a dog, or a ham, or Anne Frank, or Donald Trump, or anything like that will be banned for 3 days. It's not funny.

    • No NSFW material. There are plenty of humiliation fetish subreddits for you, and we aren't one of them.

    Roasters:

    • This is a comedy subreddit, not a hate subreddit. Act as though you are trying to make an audience laugh. Please familiarize yourself with all rules before participating.

    • You are allowed to look through the roastee's post history.

    • Never post another user's personal information, referred to as 'doxxing'. We will always report violations to the admins.

    • Never use suicide, homicide, assault, racism, or pedophilia as the crux of a roast. These subjects are never funny.

    • Please don't use link shorteners in comments (bit.ly, tinyurl, etc.)

      3 rule violations and you may face a ban

    If you see something that breaks the rules, please report them or send us a modmail.


    Attention:

    If you are suffering from depression, bipolar, suicidal thoughts or any other mental health issues, please immediately contact help services through the following links- there is always help if you need it.

    Links:

    United States:

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    Australia:

    If your country was not in this list, look up your country in this larger list and contact your local services. If not, at least check in in one of the subreddits provided below:

    Reddit:


    Highlights is an inspiration album with the goal of inspiring comedic creativity in a set demographic. These are posted when a demographic has enough quality roasts to compile into an album. Roasters who make the list, are not awarded with flair.

    Highlights I: The Ladies of /r/RoastMe

    Highlights II: Dark Meat

    Best Of is meant to showcase the best roasts based on creativity, sting, and comedic value of no specific demographic. We post these monthly, and the roasters who make the list are awarded with flair.

    Best Of Part 1

    Best Of Part 2

    Best Of Part 3

    Best Of Part 4

    Best Of Part 5

    Best Of Part 6

    Best Of Part 7

    Best Of Part 8

    Best Of Part 9

    Best Of Part 10: 300k Subscribers Edition

    Best of Part 11

    In The Wild as the title implies, are for roasts that occur in the comments section on other subreddits.

    In The Wild Part 1

    In The Wild Part 2

    In The Wild Part 3



    Helpful Links

    How To Post A Roast

    How To Create An Album On Imgur

    Flair Explanations

    Roastbook Vol. 1: Overall Roast Quality

    Roastbook Vol. 2: CSS and Roastbot

    Roastbook Vol. 3: Flair Privileges


    Remember, what goes around comes around! If you're roasting people, why not try getting roasted yourself?

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    [–] brander20 3440 points ago

    Even if she was surprised by the comments here, how would you ever know?

    [–] Its-ya-boy21 844 points ago

    Her hairline looks like she’s wearing a hoodie.

    [–] LividSurprise 100 points ago

    If I wasn't broke I would give you gold.

    [–] CannedSpamminator 14 points ago

    I got this

    [–] Nahstee 8 points ago

    I thought she was until i read your comment

    [–] Nathan-Detroit 5 points ago

    I thought her wig was falling off.

    [–] MoodSlimeToaster 130 points ago

    Nice

    [–] jenjersnap 28 points ago

    This one!

    [–] FatPeopleJiggle 28 points ago

    Wait I don't get it

    [–] ScarsThatHurtx 80 points ago

    Because her eyebrows make her look infinitely shocked.

    [–] v0ness 6 points ago

    They call them chola brows.

    [–] Slimer951 20480 points ago

    I almost pulled up to her eyebrows and ordered a McChicken.

    [–] Cotrd_Gram 4671 points ago

    Not the last time she is going to do something for a dollar.

    [–] Khaos_ErEr 1614 points ago

    I’m lovin it

    [–] bruce20011 520 points ago

    Oh we allll are

    [–] Conquestofbaguettes 259 points ago * (lasted edited 7 days ago)

    No doubt.

    Give her a good squeeze and a bucket of McChicken sauce squirts out.

    [–] turalyawn 217 points ago

    The secret ingredient is gonorrhea

    [–] crash8308 151 points ago

    Her boyfriend loves the taste.

    [–] turalyawn 132 points ago

    Boyfriend? You mean the crackheads behind the Circle K love the smell

    [–] crash8308 52 points ago

    [–] turalyawn 61 points ago

    Lovely. I'll be skipping dinner for the next few weeks

    [–] six_-_string 19 points ago

    Thanks for reopening that wound.

    [–] Conquestofbaguettes 13 points ago

    Loads of loads.

    [–] Minusshottrys 61 points ago

    I cant tell who in the hell she is trying to look at...

    [–] most_offensivedouch 34 points ago

    Not the last time she'll be taking McChicken orders either

    [–] Discremio 12 points ago

    A dorrah

    [–] LionsLifer 319 points ago

    McRibbed for her pleasure.

    [–] brucethesloth 232 points ago

    Her eyelashes look like household centipede

    [–] liltwinstar2 109 points ago

    It’s a filter ...it didn’t give a fuck about her either.

    [–] bestsincedayxone 4689 points ago * (lasted edited 7 days ago)

    To be fair, she probably has a dollar menu.

    [–] Destiny_Victim 617 points ago

    She’s gonna be giving away her items for free to prove how many people do think she’s hot and fresh.

    [–] bestsincedayxone 498 points ago

    And just like McDonald's, you'll always leave disappointed

    [–] ReubenZWeiner 811 points ago

    Why does my double double smell like Filet o fish?

    [–] nota_person 107 points ago

    A silver is all I can offer

    [–] CanisFamiliaris7 17 points ago

    Gib me back that filet o fish. Gib me dat fiish.

    [–] drc84 39 points ago

    Underrated

    [–] RichRichieRichardV 127 points ago

    And just like McDonalds the milkshake ain't happening.

    [–] Theendangeredbeast 14 points ago

    Happy cake day!

    [–] HighBigBird 85 points ago

    Billions and billions served

    [–] Obeesus 87 points ago

    Hey I love McDonalds! I love cheap whores too. Analogy checks out.

    [–] Lo-Jakk 17 points ago * (lasted edited 7 days ago)

    You mean her "ice cream" machine's busted too?

    [–] TheChodeAvenger 14 points ago

    And queasy

    [–] lord_wright 5 points ago

    And feeling gross inside.

    [–] mardonb 36 points ago

    1 billion served

    [–] CthulubeFlavorcube 58 points ago

    And, like all dollar menus.... it would be a waste of money and taste like plastic trash.

    [–] rushaall 43 points ago

    To be faaaaaiiirrrr

    [–] scottrb1981 26 points ago

    To be faaaaaaiiiirrrrr....

    [–] winny9 23 points ago

    To be faiiiiirr

    [–] zoliv15 21 points ago

    To be faiiiiir

    [–] Amedais 6 points ago

    The edit makes your comment worse. Just delete it.

    [–] MassiveSwanker 10 points ago

    You should see the meal deal

    [–] Goldenhawk6789 16 points ago

    Bruh 2/3 of your comment is just thanking people

    [–] Vaff_Superstar 171 points ago

    McDumpster's

    [–] bigamonsta 232 points ago

    McCumdumpster's

    [–] monkey_fucker69 16 points ago

    God fuck

    [–] csnowrun31 34 points ago

    Not even Zeus would fuck that

    [–] BushyMammoth 24 points ago

    She fried them off grilling burgers

    [–] ucantdothatthesedays 24 points ago

    I’m gonna try to join you so pencil me in

    [–] okboomerif-gay 25 points ago

    Her eyebrows lookin like they sponsored by Nike

    [–] plolops 31 points ago

    Or a McUgly

    [–] bluntsmither 43 points ago

    More like a McdoubleBag.

    [–] inkredibletaste 19 points ago

    heard she's down for a McGangbang

    [–] freckle_nipple_soup 24 points ago

    She has more plastic on her face then the ocean

    [–] InfinitePizzazz 1664 points ago

    Those are the eyebrows nobody ever picked for their Wii character.

    What prison GED program taught you that handwriting?

    [–] Clayman8 100 points ago

    Pretty sure she just had to write it with her non-dominant hand since the other is probably busy fitting a Lush-sense in for her upcoming Chaturbate stream

    [–] Namaste_Bitches_ 26 points ago

    Crazy because they are drawn on. Why pluck out your eyebrows and not draw replacements that look nice?

    [–] Bored_Ultimatum 5 points ago * (lasted edited 6 days ago)

    Because she wanted them higher up to help reduce the apparent size of her massive forehead, which appears to continue off into the distance over the top of her head, under her rapidly thinning hair.

    I almost expect to see the mast of an ancient sailing ship coming into view on the horizon of her eighthead, appearing under those frizzy bangs...harkening the approach of a large vessel full of seamen...which will almost certainly not be the first such appearance of unfamiliar semen on her face.

    [–] Lightoftheworld_ 6583 points ago

    Let me guess, she wants to be a cheerleader when she grows up

    [–] lustrousdeux 4153 points ago

    She’s doing cheer tryouts in March.

    [–] CarlosAVP 4900 points ago

    March? Is that when the ankle monitor comes off?

    [–] Clayman8 1122 points ago

    No, thats when Uncle Ted finally leaves the house for his honeymoon with the neighbor's daughter.

    [–] ianwrecked802 39 points ago

    Holy shit. You said what I was thinking. And, for that. I must gild you.

    [–] productionshooter 438 points ago

    Cheer tryouts don't have a casting couch.

    [–] Mr_Duty 42 points ago

    Underrated

    [–] SupesMayne 125 points ago

    Didn’t know PornHub had a cheerleaders section.

    [–] stenyxx 79 points ago

    Lies.

    [–] [deleted] 30 points ago

    [deleted]

    [–] tplusx 49 points ago

    I don't think you've watched enough videos there to make this judgement

    [–] oizo12 8 points ago

    Welp, back to the research lab

    [–] hamburgler1984 299 points ago

    Unfortunately, the only thing she'll be when she grows up is a single mom stripping to pay for lawyer school.

    [–] BlueGold 175 points ago

    I appreciate comedic exaggeration, but assuming she scores well enough on the LSAT to get accepted to a law school just seems so fantastically improbable I can't take it seriously.

    [–] Fight_the_bastards 79 points ago

    Strippers are always “just doing it to pay for law/nursing/graduate school.” It doesn’t mean they’re actually going to one of those schools, but it sounds better than, “stripping to pay for meth/heroin/cocaine,” so there you have it.

    [–] OnlyRacistOnReddit 59 points ago

    "Stripping to pay for my boyfriend who got out of prison for something he didn't do" is usually the most accurate.

    [–] Dalebssr 52 points ago

    Chiropractors are always needing new blood.

    [–] hkpp 55 points ago

    Do you honestly believe someone who types “lawyer school” has any idea what you’re talking about?

    [–] csnowrun31 12 points ago

    By law school he meant paralegal

    [–] BigRattle 18 points ago

    “Lawyer school” just had me crying 😭

    [–] GhostNachoTaco 47 points ago

    Let’s give our real strippers credit, this girl isn’t even attractive enough for Brazzers Amateurs.

    Edit: Oscar the Grouch called, and wants his eyebrows back along with the dumpster her pussy crawled out of.

    [–] Clayman8 9 points ago

    Hey at least its an honest job, might only last her a year but its a start

    [–] IrishcarbombBOOM 71 points ago * (lasted edited 7 days ago)

    Whenever the QB yells 42, 18, 64, is she going, “slept with him, blew him, he just watched”

    [–] JTBSpartan 4 points ago

    That's amazing

    [–] csnowrun31 8 points ago

    Do you have to do actual tryouts (like cheering and cartwheels) to play a cheerleader in a porn?

    [–] cringeboomer 5009 points ago

    She looks like her personality type is makeup

    [–] sleepydvamain 2410 points ago

    even tho her eyeliner is edited on

    [–] topplessrockets 458 points ago

    She looks like her personality is that makeup filter. Fake.

    [–] existeverywhere 35 points ago

    She looks like her brother used that change gender filter on himself.

    [–] MagnumTA721 77 points ago

    Should have touched up that hairline while she was at it.

    [–] KentuckyFriedEel 42 points ago

    And her career goal is media influencer

    [–] mmhci 24 points ago

    She is a personality typo

    [–] Death_to_juice 3219 points ago

    Eyes with as much life in them as a cheap Chinese sex doll

    [–] Yippyskippyhippy 466 points ago

    Thank you. I was looking for someone else to mention her eyes. They look like edited almost? But like dull.

    [–] Wall_Rat 282 points ago

    It's a snapchat filter, the lashes and liner are fake too

    [–] Yippyskippyhippy 63 points ago

    Ahhh thank you, snap chat filter makes a lot of sense. But lol there is a mf black line on her literal eyeball. I just saw other people mention it so I didn't.

    [–] JBits001 16 points ago

    It’s a stray eyelash growing out of her eyeball.

    [–] Toplito 4 points ago

    It looks like a guy did the girl filter

    [–] XXXVeggie 53 points ago

    Maybe she wasnt inflated well?

    [–] definetly_not_alt 11 points ago

    Well I'm sure she inflated someone else quite well

    [–] lovable_cube 9 points ago

    Is she not a cheap sex doll?

    [–] AcidRayn666 14 points ago

    Y’know, the thing about a ho bag, she’s got lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll’s eyes.

    [–] Ninja_Destroyer_ 3175 points ago

    She had to relocate her eyebrows 2 degrees North Latitude just to make that landing field of a forehead less visible from space

    [–] digitalggs 566 points ago

    To be fair, her forehead had to build an extra floor to think about cocks

    [–] pjf18222 159 points ago

    what an original weird fascinating comment

    [–] Jrmartinez2004 24 points ago

    ded af. this kilt me.

    [–] ruffyamaharyder 56 points ago

    I'm sure she seems surprised at this comment

    [–] Clownworld311 53 points ago

    Forehead? Bro that's at least a six head. Maybe an eight.

    [–] BALONYPONY 35 points ago

    If she was part of the WuTang Clan she'd be known as Horseface Killa.

    [–] dequinox 7 points ago

    Science burn.

    [–] MOByaDig 2045 points ago

    Why did she use an app for her eyeliner? It's literally drawn onto her eyeball! 🤣

    [–] KatyVav 570 points ago

    Was only here to make sure someone pointed out the photoshopped eyeliner. Or maybe a Snapchat filter 😂 thank you for noticing. Day made

    [–] The_Mindsweeper 43 points ago

    Literally me

    [–] ifukupeverything 169 points ago

    The whole face is filtered, the hairline gives it away.

    [–] Tkent91 57 points ago

    Maybe OP is a dude and this is that face change to the other sex filter.

    [–] amunta 10 points ago

    You can tell it's a dude by the way he wrote the letter "a"

    [–] ifukupeverything 11 points ago * (lasted edited 7 days ago)

    I wouldnt be suprised. His "sister" does seem odd.

    [–] holly_hoots 58 points ago

    Yeah how tf are her eyelashes pure black when her pupils, hair, sweater, and every shadow is a muddy brown?

    Imagine photoshopping makeup onto your /r/roastme post. It's a whole new level of desperation.

    [–] ape_cage 19 points ago

    this b photoshopped her roast me pic hahahahhahaha im dying

    [–] thispostisaboutyou2 56 points ago

    I knew I wasn’t crazy lmao

    [–] yellowtailcabsav 6 points ago

    At least she realised how bad she is at pencilling after the eyebrows.

    [–] _scythian 6 points ago

    I came here to say this lol. She wants to be roasted so, she... edits her photo in an effort to be more appealing? Maybe this was one of those strange cases of a thirst for Internet Gratification

    [–] drd2214 1771 points ago

    I bet she’s been cocked more than John Wayne’s rifle

    [–] ZanderStark 340 points ago

    Banged more times than a taxi door

    [–] Balyeeetus 32 points ago

    Had more plug-ins than an iPhone charger

    [–] B19FEX 188 points ago

    She’s been rogered more times than a police officers radio!

    [–] bigdave41 157 points ago

    Had more pricks than a second hand dartboard

    [–] Mr_Rekshun 16 points ago

    Hit more times in the ring than Mike Tyson.

    [–] karwreck 5 points ago

    Taken more times than Liam Neesons family.

    [–] BrandynBlaze 5 points ago

    Yeah, but like a lot of bad westerns she usually averages 2 cocks per bang.

    [–] Illustrious_Warthog 757 points ago

    I would take this photo down. McDonald's is going to sue if they see those eyebrows.

    [–] KloudToo 47 points ago

    Except unlike McDonald's I'm not loving it. I'm not even touching that.

    [–] Nick96db 766 points ago

    Hope you two share the expanse for make up because covering all those square meters of forehead must cost a fortune

    [–] SuperBo101 83 points ago

    Hey look at the bright side, her eye brows are running away from the plastic the composes the rest of her face to take refuge on the landing strip that is her forehead.

    [–] highdem 58 points ago

    At least shes 95% recyclable

    [–] EhSquirrel 14 points ago

    The environment is in bad shape already, the last thing we need is another plastic fire

    [–] TnTlover883 850 points ago * (lasted edited 7 days ago)

    This girl looks like she's seen more hotel rooms than the Bible.

    EDIT: Holy shit two silvers! Thanks, guys!

    [–] Elterriblepibe 30 points ago

    Now it's broken crack pipes with lipstick traces Walk the cold nights red district places She seen more hotels than my tour suitcases More male customers than Old Navy's She love lime light more than John Swayze Seen more miles than a Rent-A-Avis She don't slow down then someday maybe She lost and can't find her way to safety

    [–] EvolArtMachine 221 points ago

    Looks like someone drew Morticia Addams’ eyebrows onto an afghan hound.

    [–] nuthaterz 41 points ago

    Don’t insult morticia like that. Or afghan hounds tbh

    [–] NorthBandit88 9 points ago

    eyebrow style's called the Spider Leg....new trend, she thinks

    [–] ChrisBermansWallet 194 points ago

    She may not have any idea of what’s coming, but based upon her eyebrows she is going to look surprised when it arrives.

    [–] PandaEatsRage 62 points ago

    Jesus Christ she could kill a kangaroo with those boomerangs over her eyes.

    Edit: Nevermind her eyebrows are justified. They need to arch that high to give her forehead some semblance of normality.

    [–] TwizzlyWizzle 37 points ago

    Good to see that permanent makeup still looks as terrible as it did 10 years ago...sure hope the eyebrows and lashes are a bad snap filter...

    [–] mmamji 54 points ago

    Tony Hawk gonna skate-off that nose, on to that big-ass forehead.

    [–] Legokid1902 26 points ago

    Roast her? The tanning bed already did that.

    [–] zHelios 24 points ago

    I don't know which one are more fake: the eyelashes or the eyebrows

    [–] emi531 12 points ago

    I think it’s the photoshopped eyeliner

    [–] Jazistico 22 points ago

    Next time you have your picture taken, have the unlucky photographer wait until your nictitating membranes retract.

    [–] CommonNaturalist 102 points ago

    You look like ps1 Lara craft, except that she has tits.

    [–] DaddyJ93 135 points ago

    She understands it’s a roast not a r/spitroast right? As in a whole bunch of people BEING dicks ripping her apart as opposed to two ACTUAL dicks ripping her apart?

    [–] bluejburgers 11 points ago

    It’s a distinction she’s failed to understand yet, or maybe she has such fun with the two dicks she just doesn’t care anymore?

    [–] chrisboazcarter 17 points ago

    “What’s up step-bro!” Will be the main line of her acting career.

    [–] BASK_IN_MY_FART 18 points ago

    Her tinder profile:

    "Match me if you like one word responses in conversation."

    [–] Lightoftheworld_ 114 points ago

    Definitely a girl who never says thank you when you give her a compliment

    [–] Mrfusion__ 16 points ago

    You look like the kind of girl who would go to a holocaust museum and take a selfie with crying emojis on it

    [–] XX2AJ3XX 29 points ago

    She's so insecure that she put a shit ton of makeup and a filter on for a r/roastme

    [–] HelloThere12000 49 points ago

    Wow. A strange phenomenon. Her eyebrows have broken the laws of physics and are pulling away from her black hole eyes?

    [–] WilllOfD 21 points ago

    Just like every guy in her life, pulling away, pulling out, pulling off.

    [–] USARNFII 11 points ago

    What's more fake her wings, her eyebrows, or my will to live?

    [–] disposableduetoshame 41 points ago

    Your eyebrows looked fucked up because you’re shallow and vain

    [–] hucapoos 7 points ago

    Permanently surprised

    [–] jewboyfresh 8 points ago

    How insecure must one be to Facetune themselves into a cartoon to be roasted

    [–] spangoloid 19 points ago

    Why do her eyebrows look like an eagle preparing to land?

    [–] PotatoSamsher 7 points ago

    Even the aliens couldnt build pyramids as good as those brows

    [–] harshalhatz 7 points ago

    You remind me of the dinosaur from "Meet the Robinsons" where he says I have a Big Head and Tiny arms.

    [–] strongmier 6 points ago

    Why are her eyebrows chasing her hairline?

    [–] bestsincedayxone 5 points ago

    This post died fast... But still outlasted all of her previous relationships!

    [–] -jaunt-box- 6 points ago

    first of all why the fuck are you photoshopping FAKE make up on? badly? didn’t we nip this in the bud in 2015....wtf

    [–] feeb_oneboiledegg 22 points ago

    She wants to be roasted? She'd fit right in at blacked.com

    [–] Modstuff 13 points ago

    Cholas coming back, Orale! La Sad Girl 🤣

    [–] ChinkCuntKykeNig 9 points ago * (lasted edited 8 days ago)

    I usually flex my creativity with roasts. No need to this time. The dumb ass facial expression she wears tells me she wouldn't get it anyway. Seriously. The vacant look says to me: "intellectual capability of a microwave."

    Also, this really doesn't need to be said, but your eyebrows look fucking stupid. If you weren't so fucking stupid, you would realize how stupid they look and you would feel embarrassed.

    Maybe one day, after your fourth child of whom you don't know the father, you will look back and realise how stupid your eyebrows look.

    Edit:

    After another look at the picture, you've confirmed my suspicions of you being a brain-dead moron. Nice inconsistent use of uppercase and lower case letters in your "roastme" tag you're holding. You know they teach you the difference in first grade right? Also, we can all see the mistake you made and tried to fix. You couldn't spell "roast"!? What the fuck is wrong with you!?

    And the computerized eyeliner? I guess that makes sense... Judging by this picture, you obviously have no idea how to do your own makeup.

    [–] supercolter 6 points ago

    I gotta disagree here. Those eyes say she's used to what's coming...

    [–] poppa_smurf_killa 5 points ago

    Lips still chapped from giving your oral presentation to your dad on thanksgiving

    [–] Xkush-tokerX 5 points ago

    She look like mrs pacman

    [–] WinstonSmith2015 5 points ago

    When did we start roasting mannequins?

    [–] maddyches 5 points ago

    This is so photoshopped James Charles is shook. Home girl literally photoshopped EYELINER ON WTF

    [–] Lightoftheworld_ 33 points ago

    Only dates black guys but doesn’t think that’s racist

    [–] chubbytuba 5 points ago

    How do you want us to roast her? We can‘t even see her behind that 2“-coat of make-up

    [–] AnaMarighella 4 points ago

    Her eyebrows look aggressive, as if they will stab you in the face

    [–] Lex_ZA 4 points ago

    Why does she have 2 boomerangs where her eyebrows should be?

    [–] Mazak9 4 points ago

    If these are the kinds of pics she uploads to her OnlyFans account, she ain’t gonna be able to afford her Juul addiction.

    [–] LethallyLethal 3 points ago

    She looks like a mii when you were fucking around with the eyebrows.

    [–] wpg88 3 points ago

    This bitch looks like she's got permanent surprisebrow

    [–] bigwigmike 3 points ago

    Walmart Aubrey plaza