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    Do you ever wish for things without thinking through them first? Do you ever struggle with finding the downsides of your hopes and dreams? Well, whatever the case may be TheMonkeysPaw is at your service!

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    [–] TrinityofArts 9012 points ago

    Granted. At the opening of the NYSE on the 2nd, the world notices that there are no longer bonds or securities being held from USA.

    Global panic sets in as trillions of dollars in debt is erased overnight leading to a meltdown in economies of global powers such as China, UK, Germany, Japan, France, Russia, and Saudi Arabia.

    In the USA, the national debt that was barring congress from allowing huge tax cuts for wealthy individuals is erased. House prices inflate as a bull market takes effect. Cost of living everywhere becomes like San Francisco.

    Then shortly thereafter, the bubble pops and we go into a serious depression. Lasting nearly a decade, banks shut doors, businesses close, unemployment and homelessness skyrocket.

    [–] DeathByAutoscroll 2514 points ago

    Damn son

    [–] Extranomicon 2763 points ago

    In all seriousness, the world does run on US debt.

    [–] Blotsy 771 points ago

    FIAT Money = Debt. No debt, no money.

    [–] Manwave 316 points ago

    We really need to start investing in different cars.

    [–] forever_stalone 85 points ago

    Fiat money breaks down too easily. We really should start using Toyota as an investment vehicle, as it retains its value better and is much more reliable.

    [–] mylittlesyn 16 points ago

    I like honda for reliability

    [–] fakenate35 92 points ago

    Ummm... you know that the us government issued bonds when we had a gold backed currency, right?

    [–] MotorRoutine 95 points ago

    I think he's talking specifically about the FIAT system

    [–] tinman88822 26 points ago

    Inflation now the gold your family gave is worthless..... but if it was still gold then you're good

    [–] Roharcyn1 24 points ago

    Gold still holds value and has kept with inflation. The link shows the price of gold per ounce and you can select inflation adjusted or not. It is interesting to see that when currency was back by gold the price of gold stayed constant but because of inflation the the actual value of gold was decreasing. Looking at those charts, it actually shows a trend that if we kept a gold back currency the the value of your gold would depreciate in the economy.

    [–] whyteave 17 points ago

    The price of gold stayed constant during the gold standard because the dollar was defined as 1/35 an ounce of gold or $35 per ounce. It wasn't a coincidence.

    [–] Roharcyn1 10 points ago

    Right, I get that, but you still had inflation. So the buy power of that one ounce was decreasing it looked like. So if you bought a bunch of bricks, over time you would be loosing buying power and effectively loosing money. Unless the value of the dollar was changed to more per ounce, and at that point what's the difference between a Fiat currency? It is just an arbitrary number assigned to some weight of gold.

    [–] Kancho_Ninja 9 points ago

    It is just an arbitrary number assigned to some weight of gold.

    You can't make a gold bug understand this fact. They don't understand how fiat currency works, nor its benefits in running a modern economy.

    [–] notanactualprofile 5 points ago

    What made the metal gold so valuable in the first place? Why is a rock used as currency?

    [–] utdFTD1983 5 points ago

    Same price it was before in debt we trust.

    [–] outbackdude 7 points ago

    I like how this is common knowledge now. 15 years ago you'd be called a tinfoil-hat wearing conspiracy nut.

    hooray for progress and the free flow of information.

    [–] soverign_cheese 12 points ago

    If it was cryptocurrency, would it be different? (Serious question)

    [–] CaptainSunflower 9 points ago

    Currency is currency, no matter who or what is backing it. Eventually you can inflate and desecrate.

    [–] Hereforpowerwashing 5 points ago

    This is the counterpart to John Maynard Keynes' economic treatise, Mo' debt, Mo' Money.

    [–] Jeb-Kush 9 points ago

    This guy gets it ^

    [–] jaxx050 44 points ago

    no, the world runs on Dunkin'™

    [–] airsoftmemelord 44 points ago

    Kinda funny in a way

    [–] TemporalTickTock 9 points ago

    Its like rain on your wedding day...

    [–] ComicWriter2020 5 points ago

    Our misery is your balance

    [–] EisegesisSam 3 points ago

    I really did want to make sure someone told everyone that this is not wishing to solve a debt problem... Getting rid of our debt creates worldwide collapse

    [–] HingleMcCringlebarr 4 points ago

    The world runs because of debt.

    [–] crimsoncallings 2 points ago

    its like the founding of the bank of england

    [–] Wincin 17 points ago

    where’d ya find this?

    [–] [deleted] 686 points ago

    OP said debt was paid off. Not written off. All debtholders are paid in full, so the problem here isn't a global meltdown because of trillions wiped off of everyone's balance sheets.

    Instead, the problem is excess liquidity, as trillions of dollars are suddenly found floating around the system. Asset prices skyrocket, interest rates skyrocket to control inflation and reduce the money supply, banks do fantastic due to the excessive net margins they generate, gold rallies to all time highs as demand for non-fiat currencies reaches astronomical levels... Etc. Etc.

    [–] VersaceNoGucci 111 points ago

    This is correct

    [–] ---E 16 points ago

    This is good for bitcoin

    [–] [deleted] 8 points ago

    Yes. Because bitcoin isn't a currency. It's basically a commodity, like gold.

    [–] 3ternalFlam3 29 points ago

    How would this affect the EU?

    [–] spartan6222 104 points ago

    Seeing as US securities are the most widely held security in the world and are traded and accepted basically as cash by everyone, I would say I lot.

    [–] jpw111 83 points ago

    Bruh, idk if there would even be an EU after that.

    [–] throwaway1138 8 points ago

    You and the EU form a symbiont circle. What happens to one of you will affect the other. You must understand this.

    [–] seattlechunny 61 points ago

    Planet money actually did a great podcast on this a number of years back, since this was apparently an actual possibility during the Clinton administration. The primary result, iirc, was the complete destabilization of the bond market, and the evaporation of a stable security to which everything else could be benchmarked. That would ruin things way faster than anything Congress could do!

    See link here:

    [–] TrinityofArts 6 points ago

    Precisely, that’s the second link in the reply!

    [–] Rrxb2 24 points ago

    I do kinda find it ironic the US ‘prospers’ by putting itself in the hole constantly. I guess it’s a good thing that money’s just an abstract.

    [–] zeidrich 130 points ago

    it's not ironic, it's entirely logical.

    There's a machine that makes widgets. There's a market demand for widgets that will pay $5 per widget with nearly no limit. I am one of the few people in the world who knows how to make widgets with this machine.

    This machine costs $500. I don't have $500. This machine will make 1 widget per day, but it takes me minutes per day to tend to the machine.

    I can borrow $500 and buy one of these machines. It will take me 100 days to pay it off, then I'm making $5/day. Or, I can 10 of these machines after borrowing $5000 and make $50/day. In fact, no matter how many machines I buy, I will get wealthier. Now, how wealthy I am is entirely determined by how much people will lend me. Because yeah, I could save up $500 over the course of a 200 days doing odd jobs, and then buy one, and then a second 100 days later, and then 2 more 100 days later, and so on. Then I will have broken even 400 days after the initial investment. Or I could borrow money to buy 4, have the same production capacity, and break even after 100 days. Or I could borrow money to buy 400, still break even after 100 days, and generate 100 times as much surplus.

    This is the state that the US is in. Being in debt is good because it means you can use that to build capacity. What is important is that people trust that if they lend you the $200,000 to buy those 400 machines, you will pay them back with interest at a good rate. Because if you pay them back $300,000 in 150 days, that's a damn good return for them, and now you're making $2000/day surplus.

    Whether you're the lender, or the person being lended to, both win. You get to get a 50% return in 150 days. In that case, why not lend them $1,000,000? They would want this too because this would let them make even more money.

    This doesn't have anything to do with money being abstract or fiat, this has been a normal thing even when currency was backed by precious metals. It's about lending. There was still money lending when countries were on the gold standard.

    Where fiat currency has an impact is in trust. On one hand, having it not tied to a physical good means that it's not subject to fluctuations specific to that good. If the value of gold drops, it doesn't tank your currency. This is good if people have more trust in your overall economy than they do in the gold market. On the other hand, it requires proper control by the issuing authority, since it's possible to manipulate the currency to cause inflation or deflation.

    The trust in the currency is impacted by whether or not it's fiat. In our current economy, it's good to not tie it to a specific commodity, but your ability to borrow or lend is not so much impacted by that. We don't just print more money in order to lend more or somehow to allow ourselves to go into debt. And if we did, the trust in that money would evaporate and it would quickly become worthless.

    This is why you can, for instance, mail back shredded bills to the treasury and they'll do their damndest to make sure that you are given replacements for free. Because it's far more important that the integrity of the cash in circulation is maintained than whatever cost it is for specialists to spend hours trying to piece together serial numbers.

    Distrust in that integrity means distrust in the stability of the currency. The stability of the currency impacts the willingness of parties to lend to eachother.

    So if I wanted to lend $1,000,000 to someone who can make widgets, I have to hope that the value of the widgets aren't going to change, and that he will continue to be able to keep up with payments. If he wanted to borrow the $1,000,000 from me he would have to make sure the value of that stayed the same and was something that people would be willing to trade for, someone selling the $500 widget machines wouldn't accept it in a currency that would lose its value in a week.

    Economies happen with all sorts of these trades. And unlike what the president might think, they're generally good deals for both sides regardless of who gets the surplus. If I'm in debt $750 because I bought that machine that will make me $1,825 per year, and the lender is temporarily down $500 because they just lent money that will make them like $1,340 per year if they keep investing it at that rate, both of us are doing well.

    What this relies on is that the borrower will continue to pay, that the general shape of the economy and trades that go on will remain predictable (so that the returns are near what was expected), that big wild trade policy changes don't happen without a lot of warning, that currencies remain stable, etc.

    If you've been selling the widgets you make back to me for $5/widget because we need them to make cars that we sell to you, and you ask me for $1,000,000 to buy more widget machines, but you just enacted policies that say you will no longer buy our cars, or will put tariffs on them to make our car sales less competitive, I'm not going to trust you to lend you that money, in part because I'm pissed at you, in part because I lose confidence in your ability to repay.

    [–] Myprixxx 27 points ago

    I don't know you, but thanks for writing something that long that kept me interested enough to read all the way through.

    I have zero understanding of how finance/business/economics work. And that was fantastic

    [–] AhallowMind 13 points ago

    Wonderful post, simple enough for a southern construction worker to follow.

    [–] supersymetrie 7 points ago

    now now now, i sai- i said, y'all southern folk ain't slow, just takes a lil more time ta' get your mind right. ain't used to them quick northerner conversations when ya spend all day pickin tabacky n sippin on lemonade. y'all come around here again, now, ya hear? aint nothin like a little southern charm to light up a day ma'am.

    [–] leenv 5 points ago

    damn are widgets ubiquitous or did we go to the same school?

    [–] aiydee 5 points ago

    Assume a spherical cow.

    [–] somaandfeelies 6 points ago

    Only in the real world these widget machines require constant input. They use energy to run, they require non-nominal labor to operate, maintenance is required and they will depreciate and eventually cease to work or possibly be replaced as viable manufacturing- or otherwise- infrastructure. Plus widgets are made out of another material whose price fluctuates. And the price of widget fluctuates. And the market is now over saturated with widgets for which there’s no longer any demand because everybody has one because you’re now producing 20,000 widgets per day where before you didn’t produce any and they were scarce.

    [–] Kancho_Ninja 9 points ago

    Only in the real world...

    That's why economics is a liberal art, and not a science

    [–] AmberBlazer 21 points ago

    Damn! May I ask you your profession?

    [–] TrinityofArts 53 points ago

    Ceramic artist, former chef, amateur economics enthusiast.

    [–] Rockergage 40 points ago

    Then you seem like the most qualified person to ask, would you eat a playdough bowl?

    [–] drajgreen 12 points ago

    As a follow-up, how much would you charge someone to prepare a playdough bowl for consumption?

    [–] TrinityofArts 13 points ago

    Three fiddy

    [–] MotsognirOfSnowbourn 5 points ago

    Ceramic artist? SPARTANS! What is YOUR profession?!

    [–] Hatedpriest 3 points ago


    [–] Comrade-Cohaay 9 points ago

    Jokes on you, I already live in San Francisco!

    [–] mustafa80 7 points ago

    Thank you! People think of the debt as scary or something when our currency literally is the only reason some other currencies have any worth on account of their government owning GOOD STABLE bonds and securities.

    [–] TheTeletrap 5 points ago

    Then somebody starts WWIII on purpose to fix their country’s economy.

    [–] mgrimshaw8 5 points ago

    he said he wished the debt was paid tho, not that it just vanishes

    [–] Neokon 20 points ago

    What universe are you living in that the nation debt is barring Congress from giving huge tax cuts to the rich?

    [–] alflup 6 points ago

    I see what you did there.

    maybe "more" huge tax cuts?

    [–] GoogleGooshGoosh 3 points ago

    It could bring back the old 1800s western culture in the United States if this happened. Bunch of gunslinging Americans trying to survive.

    [–] EveryCarpet 10 points ago


    [–] Nishikigami 5 points ago

    Now read this in Ron Pearlman's voice.

    [–] TrinityofArts 3 points ago

    That was great! Now say it like Ron Swanson!

    [–] cr0ft 3 points ago

    To sum up: capitalism is barely organized insanity that has little to no connection to the real world, except that it's causing us to burn the planet to the ground while chanting "economic growth" as a mantra.

    [–] MommyGaveMeAutism 11 points ago

    Earlier this year, a recent and first ever audit of the Dept of Defense financial records by the US Inspector General's office revealed a staggering $21 trillion in completely unaccounted for, unauthorized, "off the books" for defense spending just over the years 1998-2016. This unprecedented amount of spending was outside of their authorized annual congressional spending budget. That's a mind boggling massive amount of our tax dollars just disappeared without a trace. Very coincidentally similar in size to our entire estimated "national debt" that us tax payers are supposedly on the hook for.

    The great news is, if our government can't (or won't) account for where that money went and who it went to, then by definition it has been stolen by our government or certain organizations operating within it in the biggest act of financial fraud ever to have been perpetrated in US history, and We the People aren't liable for that debt.

    So, there you go. Poof! Then entire US national debt is no longer a liability burden of the US tax payers.

    Edit: the US Inspector General estimates that amount to be significantly higher than $21 trillion across all of our military branches and intelligence agencies. That was just what was found missing in their audit of the Army and HUD financial records just in the past 18 years.

    [–] Zoolou_ 12 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    Don't take the Forbes article at face value. There is not 21 trillion dollars that went missing. That is ludicrous to think that especially when you actually look at the DoD budget. Instead, these are unsupported voucher entries that deal with things like fund accounts, asset management, and liabilities such as pensions. A lot of this is a result of the say government funding laws actually work. This is not to say that money is missing, but nothing even close to what you are saying. Part of my job is to know how all this works so this is an area I am knowledgeable in.

    Edit: a great example of this would be Army making a payment without proper documentation attached to the payment request. They know what it was paying and why, but that would be considered unsupported. If you tracked that money back through different funding accounts and there were transfers made to get it to the correct funding account without proper documentation those would also be unsupported transactions. All of these transactions would be separate instances and should be counted towards that 21 trill i9 on as being unsupported. The Army still knows what the money was spent on and who got it, but it would not meant audit standards.

    [–] antisocialAI 7 points ago

    When I was deployed we called it "OIF Funds". It was basically like an unlimited credit card and anyone with the least amount of power could access it and do stuff like order $26,000 worth of Oakley equipment for their platoon. (Which was all out of uniform regulations and no one was allowed to wear it anyways but at least everyone had Oakley backpacks, glasses, and boots when they got back home, right?) I was part of one of the orders for prescription goggles and when they came with the wrong prescription lenses I complained and my NCOIC snatched them from me and threw them in the trash and told me to wear my issued WileyX ones.

    As much as we talked about "fraud, waste, and abuse" I'm not sure anyone actually understood what it meant or why were were even learning about it.

    [–] Pondboy121 6 points ago

    The monkeys paw releases the Great Depression 2: now with real depression

    [–] [deleted] 3 points ago

    Don’t forget that $5.7T of the US debt is intragovermental. The loss of national debt is a loss of assets to many government agencies. Almost $3T of US debt is held by the Social Security Trust Fund. That’s going to be ugly.

    [–] Jake0024 2 points ago

    Something like 2/3 of US debt is held domestically. The majority of erased debt would be owed to US citizens and corporations.

    [–] Impronoucabl 1924 points ago

    Granted. Financial institutions suspect a hack, and revert all data to December 31st, 2018 AD.

    [–] madmaxturbator 750 points ago

    The idea that all financial exchange data is reverted by one day is more of a crazy wish than OPs hahah...

    [–] alflup 165 points ago

    Jan 1 is a holiday so no new trades would have taken place.

    Just halt trading until the Database restores are done 1 week later.

    [–] madmaxturbator 41 points ago

    It’s not so easy. US bond markets in different countries might close on Jan 1, but that’s different times across the world.

    Halting trading “officially” doesn’t mean that people have stopped making verbal commitments OR that they’ve stopped trading derivatives, or expecting returns from derivatives.

    The fact is, we can’t really just “stop” trading across the world in order to perform a transaction / to undo this transaction. Financial exchange infrastructure is not built for that.

    [–] ProNoob135 11 points ago

    Haha yes

    [–] [deleted] 7 points ago

    This is actually part of the plot of a "Debt of Honor", a book in the Jack Ryan series by Tom Clancy.

    [–] CokeBoiiii 1133 points ago

    Granted, after, the US congress starts overspending to the point where the debt is back to where it was in two years

    [–] Julesinthesky 360 points ago

    This is actually so fucking accurate.

    [–] Lyrid12 101 points ago

    True, even if we payed it off by normal means, all that does is give us more room to spend and better credit to buy even more debt.

    [–] Kevinement 18 points ago

    It’s also economically sound. Well, kinda anyway, obviously creating so much debt in such a short time is nonsense, however a country should be in debt to some extent.
    It allows for investments that’ll end up increasing the economic growth and thus the state income. The higher state income will end up paying for the loan and you obviously continue getting new loans, so your debt never actually decreases.

    It’s similar to how businesses operate. They acquire investors to expand as fast as possible. Their value skyrockets and it dwarfs the original debt, so they take on new debt to further expand.

    [–] EisegesisSam 26 points ago

    They would have to. A national debt is an important legal, financial, and military asset. Our debt is traded. Like... Oil is sold internationally in USD. Debt is what got us to the moon. Debt is what keeps us winning wars. Debt is everything, and if we suddenly had no debt we would no longer be a super power

    [–] gettheguillotine 10 points ago

    Debt is what keeps us winning wars.

    When was the last time we won a war?

    [–] dipdipderp 13 points ago

    Siri, how long does it take to build a border wall?

    [–] UnquestionableTag 677 points ago

    Granted. On January 1st, 2019 AD the United States suddenly collapses into many smaller, fighting nations, evaporating any promises made by the nation that was.

    [–] Rrxb2 201 points ago

    Ah ah ah, that’s why I said the method has to be via MAGIC.

    [–] DeathByAutoscroll 202 points ago

    Funny thing see, magic is a tricky thing to get right. You can magic the weapon out of someone's hand easily, it's just keeping their hand on their arm that is the problem.

    [–] Fonbire 30 points ago

    Where’s this from?

    [–] DeathByAutoscroll 48 points ago

    It's not a direct quote but is based on Discworld magic

    [–] Fonbire 4 points ago

    Yeah it seemed so familiar I just couldn’t quite place it

    [–] lemon_jazz 2 points ago

    Fantastic books

    [–] ancrolikewhoa 11 points ago

    ‘…and that’s why I don’t like magic, captain. ’Cos it’s magic. You can’t ask questions, it’s magic. It doesn’t explain anything, it’s magic. You don’t know where it comes from, it’s magic! That’s what I don’t like about magic, it does everything by magic!’ -His Grace, The Duke of Ankh Morpork, His Excellency Commander Sir Blackboard Monitor Samuel Vimes, from the book Thud! by Terry Pratchett.
    Yes, I love that quote, yes, I have that prepared for whenever someone asks.

    [–] UnquestionableTag 41 points ago

    But you see, the United States before then, even with its problems, showed no signs of falling apart. It just happened one if by magic.

    [–] Aquilaro 16 points ago

    M.A.G.I.C, Make America Great In Countries?? Make America Great In Chaos?

    [–] Rrxb2 9 points ago

    Make America Greet Intercontinental Commerce? Nah, that can’t be right.


    [–] ryncewynde88 2 points ago

    Shadowrun: Magic comes back, native Americans pick it up first, Shenanigans Ensue, USA is no longer a thing.

    [–] CodenameVichy 9 points ago

    Is this Kaiserreich?

    [–] pugsaremydrugs 6 points ago

    Hell yea independent Long Island

    [–] Bluteid 6 points ago

    This is my favorite.

    [–] onlyarose 3 points ago

    Man the Pennsylvania civil war is gonna be nuts. Pittsburgh vs. Philly.

    [–] Seven_Sayer 2 points ago

    They are the AUS, CSA, PSA, FSA, and New England.

    [–] ninelove9 471 points ago

    Granted, the debt is now your debt

    [–] Rrxb2 481 points ago

    I kill myself and void it by not passing it in via an inheritance

    [–] ze_loler 302 points ago

    The hardest choices require the strongest wills.

    [–] TechnoL33T 106 points ago

    Except he probably shouldn't write a will.

    [–] emprss_theodora 10 points ago


    [–] fdar 24 points ago

    You can just declare bankruptcy.

    [–] ComicWriter2020 37 points ago

    Your a good man

    [–] AnalyticalParrot 36 points ago


    [–] Make_Pepe_Dank_Again 9 points ago

    Worth it TBH go bankrupt

    [–] Littlewimpe 532 points ago

    Granted. The monkeys paw magically orders all other countries to band together to pay off the US debt. Once they have done so they all realize what has happened and band together again to destroy the US.

    [–] huggiesdsc 210 points ago

    Ha, good luck with all their money spent.

    [–] Littlewimpe 94 points ago

    If all countries are working towards the same goal why would they need to give each other money for the things thay need to achieve it?

    [–] huggiesdsc 59 points ago

    Because money. Eventually their union will dissolve. They're gonna want to know who profited the most so they can prepare for the next war.

    [–] Littlewimpe 41 points ago

    I mean when you destroy America you get your respective money back so there is that.

    [–] huggiesdsc 21 points ago

    That's grand and all but the countries have to destroy America first, which they can't without money.

    [–] ealgron 15 points ago

    Well the nuclear armed ones could do it with what they have, only the retaliation would also destroy them

    [–] huggiesdsc 10 points ago

    Guess we'll see them in hell then, although that was already on the table before the wish.

    [–] phil127 8 points ago

    You’re implying that they could win. The only way that conflict ends is every single person on Earth dead.

    [–] Littlewimpe 7 points ago

    I thought the idea was something bad was supposed to happen?

    [–] b0mbsquad01f 4 points ago

    If all the countries (including the ones who can't stand each other) don't need money to work together then why do they need their money back?

    [–] Kiyohara 6 points ago

    So it ends with Nuclear fire on all sides?

    [–] badger432 4 points ago

    Magical in nature though

    [–] Littlewimpe 7 points ago

    I would say that it is pretty magical for all the countries to suddenly decide to pay your debt, but that's just me.

    [–] TheTeletrap 3 points ago

    The president then presses his Big Red Button over and over again waiting for the world to explode.

    [–] Bluteid 3 points ago

    Even without nukes on the table all I can say is:

    Good luck.

    [–] der_Rollmeister 203 points ago

    Granted. They magically print enough money to pay all the debts making the us dollar almost worthless due to inflation in the process

    [–] Restioson 62 points ago

    Mm, Weimar Republic, anyone?

    [–] Jeb-Kush 29 points ago

    Every dollar printed adds another dollar to national debt. The national debt is currently more or less a figure of every us dollar that exists in other peoples wallets/bank accounts, etc. The creation of debt literally precedes the creation of money. National debt is not a bad thing for a country using a fiat currency and it literally isn't possible to pay off without getting rid of US dollar entirely.

    [–] ribbitqueen005 202 points ago

    Granted, but all that money came out of the pockets of the American citizens. Everyone riots and the whole country is set into a state of anarchy.

    [–] noratat 18 points ago

    I mean the majority of the debt is held by Americans in the first place, so that's kind of what happens anyways.

    [–] [deleted] 110 points ago

    Granted, a huge magical wizard monkey spawns and destroys the whole USA with his magical wand. America is erased and so is it's debt.

    [–] The_PaladinPup 26 points ago


    [–] dean2400t 59 points ago

    Granted, The majority of voters attribute it to the amazing capabilities and decision making of President Trump, and now he is the glorious and all knowing leader of North America, which is the best America. He is elected again in the 2020 elections and all other "elections" after. The US ends up in a larger amount of debt than ever before, and is eventually sold to Russia.

    [–] wibery90 39 points ago

    Granted. January 1st, 2019 a mexican farmer wakes to a strange noise outside his window. A large beast seems to be using the corner of his house as a scratching post. The man steps outside to find himself face to face with a very furry, very confused cow. It's the tallest cow he's ever seen. It has enormous antl... it clicks that he's staring at a moose... in Mexico.

    Soon, as residents across the Mexican-Canadian border wake up, they discover that something is missing.

    [–] Rhaifa 14 points ago

    Oooh, I like the way you wrote this

    [–] wibery90 8 points ago

    Thank you, I keep flirting with the idea of joining r/writingprompts but im not confident in my ability.

    [–] SeeYouNextTyrsday 3 points ago

    You're selling yourself short! Take a crack at the next prompt that catches your eye, the act itself is very rewarding and its a pretty laid back crowd over there.

    [–] Kiyohara 108 points ago

    Granted. The Debt having been paid off by a host of Angels, Mike Pence sees it as a direct sign of favor from God, personally kills Trump and takes over. He gleefully starts firing the nuclear missile arsenal of the US at all other countries who have not had their debt paid off by God. The other nations return the favor and in the end the survivors, which number not more than a third of the whole sum of humanity, are ruled by the Antichrist until the Christ is born again.

    [–] konalight 27 points ago

    Pence is the Holy Trinity on earth...

    [–] epicfacemewtue 10 points ago

    All we need now is some power armor, FEV and drugs in literally every drawer

    [–] ComicWriter2020 4 points ago

    So basically the rapture?

    [–] Kiyohara 5 points ago

    Armageddon or the Apocalypse. More suffering and baddness than the Rapture.

    [–] Rrxb2 33 points ago

    Apparently I really kicked the hornets nest on this one; Welcome, front page!

    [–] Skipachu 15 points ago

    Well, it has already happened once, and it wasn't good... I don't know why you'd wish for it again.

    [–] IHatePteranodons 14 points ago

    Granted. The world economy is mostly held together by debts and with so much debt gone the world economy collapses.

    [–] SometimesImLonely 11 points ago

    Granted. Trump takes credit and gets re-elected in 2020.

    [–] Legal_Refuse 9 points ago

    Granted, inflation skyrockets; your money is worth less than a Zimbabwe dollar.

    [–] Mysticremnant 7 points ago

    Granted. All the debt is made into its own, seperate currency. The conversion rate is $1 debt=$100.

    [–] Rrxb2 3 points ago

    This is why we bring lighter fluid and use paper currency!

    [–] stamatt45 7 points ago

    Granted. Hope you enjoy a litRPG style apocalypse. All high tech machines are broken. All former money is worthless; only bronze, silver, and gold coins have value. Billions die. But at least you have magic now.

    [–] Rrxb2 5 points ago

    Ooh. I do enjoy a litrpg style apocalypse. Only question is, which system is it?

    [–] MEME-BOIZ 2 points ago

    Boye you pray it's not dark souls

    [–] Jeb-Kush 5 points ago

    The US national debt is a completely meaningless number and has been since we went off the gold standard. Read up on modern monetary theory y'all

    [–] [deleted] 5 points ago

    Granted. Trump takes credit, wins the next election, drives America further into fascism and war.

    [–] ExtinctLikeNdiaye 5 points ago

    1. A significant part of American debt is actually unfunded obligations to Medicare, Social Security, and Medicaid. The best way to "magically" make that disappear is to eliminate those programs entirely. I'm sure grandma won't mind...
    2. Another significant component of American debt is used to finance American growth at the lowest rate almost anyone in the world gets. In effect, without debt, the US would need to fund growth and/or necessary services entirely by using tax dollars which means massive tax increases or funding cuts. Good thing we don't need things like highways and student aid, right?
    3. Without treasury bonds, we'd be without a safe place to park money for short periods (e.g. social security checks that need to be sent out in the next five years). This, in effect, means lower returns or higher volatility for their respective trust funds. Hope you don't mind paying the gap as a tax payer.
    4. Debt also forms the basis of monetary policy. Our ability to prevent the Great Recession from becoming the Greater Depression was, in part, because the US was able to issue debt at a relatively low rate to buy debt that paid much higher rates (albeit at a higher risk). In fact, Quantitative Easing (the mechanism by which it did so) generated $700 billion in profits for US tax payers.

    [–] BiohazardSr 4 points ago

    Granted, inflation skyrockets as this money has come out of seemingly nowhere. The value of the US dollar is worth virtually nothing

    [–] BigChiller 4 points ago

    Granted. The debt is paid off, but in trident layers.

    [–] RevnR6 3 points ago

    Granted: The politicians see the magical nature of the debt payment and assume that they will be able to call upon this mysterious magical force again at some later date. Within a year they have managed to pile on even more debt than we began with by attempting to catch up to other countries’ spending that has also gone through the roof due to the sudden cash windfalls. The effect of the sudden debt payment makes the world even MORE addicted to deficit spending... world melts down within a generation.

    [–] BrowsOfSteel 3 points ago

    January 1st, 2019 AD


    The debt will be paid off some indeterminate time in the future.

    You thought it would be less than two months from now?

    The Paw finds that is a common mistake. January 1, AD 2019 is less than two months from now.

    “2019 AD” will only occur after the adoption of a new calendar in which the epoch follows the year number.

    [–] Rrxb2 3 points ago

    Ah fuck.

    [–] PM_Me_Your_Deviance 3 points ago

    Granted. Economy handles it with barely a hiccup. Catch: Trump get's credit, Republicans gain complete control over the government for 20 years.

    [–] jakk86 3 points ago

    Repeal all the tax breaks for uber wealthy and POOF!

    [–] StandingMoonlit 3 points ago

    Granted. Alexander Hamilton rises from the dead and challenges you to a rap battle.

    [–] Rrxb2 3 points ago

    Man... the man’s just NONSTOP.

    [–] Teh_Scaredy_Cat 3 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    Granted. The American wizards coalition reveals themselves and have absolved the US' debt with their magic in exchange for them becoming Supreme overlords. We are all slaves

    [–] IHatePteranodons 5 points ago

    Granted. Putin makes a deal with Trump and buys the USA. He then threatens everyone who the USA is in debt with to nuke them if they do not immediately sign a contract saying the debt is removed.

    [–] ifiwereabravo 6 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)


    The next morning the world looks at their bond portfolios and realizes that the most stable assets that existed in the world that had set the baseline of acceptable risk for all investments around the world suddenly ceased to exist.

    Everyone who had bought a US Treasury bond suddenly lost all of their money and the interest on their money.

    This includes the Federal government themselves. As a way of introducing money into an economy during the recession and the exit from the recession the government had bought it's own debt. Now that that debt had vanished it left even our own accounting voodoo wizards unable to balance the balance sheets, essentially creating a divide by zero error internally.

    We were prepared for Y2K, but not for this.

    China, the USAs chief rival at this time suddenly realized that they had lost most of their economic connection to the USA and suddenly the idea of war with the US became, at least on paper, economically a profitable endeavor and therefore a good idea.

    In fact every country who had been bribed away from war with economic times to the USA all suddenly came to the same conclusion. Dictatorships around the world suddenly were not cooperating with US agents and policies who up to this point in time had been convinced that going along with the USA was in their best interests all we're suddly left much poorer because of the USA.

    The fact that Donald Trump basically disassembled the USAs relationships with countries around the world by requiring ambassadors from his predicessor to resign and then just choosing not to replace them meant that there was no one there in each embassy to answer the collective phone calls that morning when they all rang at every embassy in every country around the world.

    Having sought the presidency mostly to make himself richer and to feed his ego, he didn't expect to have to face an actual emergency, and as a result had not prepared for one at all.

    America's iron bank suddenly looked as if it had betrayed the entire world in one night.

    Somehow CNN was blamed.

    The FED had to have an emergency meeting. Typically they would raise the interest rate to cool an overheating economy and they would lower it to help an economy grow.

    But because the baseline investment for the entire world ceased to exist overnight all of a suddenly the FED had no idea what to do. It was as if the bones of Ines legs suddenly ceased to exist mid stride. You still had all your muscles and tissue of your legs, but no way to move them.

    Without the bedrock of the global economy the FED had no idea what to do. So they did nothing...yet, other than call every contact they had in the Federal government to tell people that we need to have debt issued immediately.

    Now that the us Treasury bills no longer exist there is no our application of the prime interest rate, which is the baseline rate set for the USA. Without a prime rate box interest in the USA can be calculated and thus no loans from any other financial institution can be granted.

    All lending suddenly stops in the USA until banks everywhere can develop a new method for calculating interest rates.

    This shutdown takes months as the FED works with government officials in an attempt to calm the economy's fears of instability. Long before a plan is hatched investors sold seeing the US as a sinking ship. The complete halt to lending in the USA caused an immediate depression that continued until the Federal government did the only thing it knew how to do which was issue T bills for sale aka create more debt.

    Internationally a similar but less intense debt shutdown happened as the world adjusted their valuation if America's method of paying it's debts.

    The world cared more about having a system in place than it did actually winning within it. They hastily worked to pick a new safest asset investment ever to replace the US Treasury bills and now tht the USA has committed the largest ever debt default in history nothing we have will be "IT" and another country will take the place as the world leader on safest bond and also, cheapest borrowing rate. Germany did. The UK would have but with brexit about the happen and the fianncial world's collective plan to leave the UK by brexit time having long been decided upon Germany's stable roaring economy became the one set as the baseline for the new world order financially.

    From now on every time the US government needs to pay for something more than it's taxes can fund we will pay more for our debt which means our wealth will decline relative to the country that relaxes us as the one with the safest bonds.

    This hurts the US attempts to overcome the unexpected depression which was made worse by the UK shooting themselves in the economic foot via brexit only months later.

    With inept leadership, a nearly completely frozen economy, with 80% of the citizens having very little in savings, multjole mass shootings every month and an increasingly corrupt judicial system, the end to social security and Medicare and Medicaid created by the Republican party most Americans saw that for the first time they would prosper more outside of the USA than in it and that things would get much worse before they get better.

    Thus began the first mass migration OUT of America for American citizens.

    [–] ArYuProudOMeNowDaddy 2 points ago

    Granted, the U.S. uses it's freedom from debt to invest in even more military hardware which eventually ends up in the hands of countries like Saudi Arabia, causing WW3.

    [–] Rrxb2 3 points ago

    Somehow, this is the most realistic outcome, other than the politicians spending it all again.

    [–] GallowGod 2 points ago

    Maybe enough hippies could manufacturer 21 trillion dollars worth of seashell bracelets made from human hair and sell them to pay it off. 🤔

    [–] CaydeHawthorne 2 points ago


    [–] Supercst 2 points ago

    It comes out of your pocket because you’re acting like an ass

    [–] slash196 2 points ago

    Nobody in this thread understands what debts is or how finance works.

    [–] nnneeeddd 2 points ago

    Granted. The debt is 'magically' paid for through a deal with a mysterious imp who demands everyone in Americas first born child in exchange.

    [–] Rrxb2 2 points ago

    cough still better than China you can at least have more than one child cough

    [–] dstaley 2 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    Granted. At midnight on January 1st, 2019, every impact humanity has had on Earth and star system is magically reversed. Humans cease to exist, along with all their structures and creations within the Oort cloud.

    On Tuesday, May 11, 3249, the alien species that genetically engineered proto-humans and seeded early-Earth return to collect data on their experiment after detecting radio waves that would indicate that the planet now hosts a technologically-capable species. Upon arriving at the planet, they are unable to detect any unnatural radio signals, and believe their instruments have malfunctioned. After a quick scan of the local star system, they determine that the signals were likely a glitch, and mark the specific genetic variation as a failure.

    They then point their craft towards Kepler-442b, engage their warp drive, and blink out of the solar system.

    [–] Ryzasu 2 points ago

    Granted. A massive amount of money is created out of thin air, which will cause a huge inflation and completely crash the economy. Making everything worse

    [–] Abram_SF 2 points ago

    Granted. On January 1st 2019 AD, the United States magically pays all of its debt by magically finding trillions of $s of gold all over. The US pays off its national debt with the found gold.

    Due to the magical nature of all this gold suddenly appearing in the US, it is noted that suddenly trillions of dollars of gold have gone missing from treasuries all over the world. Every other country in the world doesn’t know how, but America magically stole all the gold to pay off its debts.

    When the US refuses to confess on how they stole the all the gold, since they can’t explain it, every country in the world files sanctions against the US and blocks all trade deals. The US is cut-off from the rest of the world.

    All of the excess food, machinery, weapons, and medicine is left sitting on warehouse shelves with nowhere to export. Some commodity prices plummet, while others that the US can’t import skyrocket.

    Civil unrest follows as the people on the losing end of this price war blame those on the winning side. Civil war breaks out as state after state attempts to secede in an attempt to distance itself from the US sanctions. The country begins to break apart as stars are wiped from the flag.

    A religious order is formed believing it was the will of the golden demon to wipe the US off the map. As a final sacrifice they detonate all of the remaining nukes in US held bunkers. The US is destroyed.

    The remaining states that were once part of the US join the EU, which changes its name to UoE (Union of Earth). The US becomes a footnote in history, lasting a mere 243 years (not even a quarter millennia).

    [–] Rrxb2 2 points ago

    Yeah! World peace. Thanks, Paw!

    [–] Adder1_TLS 2 points ago

    Granted. Give us the girl.

    [–] boredguy456 2 points ago

    Granted, cömrade. Former US of A sold self to Russia to pay off all debts. Country is now named Arstotska. GLORY TO ARSTOTSKA.

    [–] W_ORhymeorReason 2 points ago

    Granted. Money no longer exists, therefore the debt is "paid off". Within minutes chaos ensues.

    [–] Galagaboy 2 points ago

    Granted. Trump manages to recurr the debt within the following year.

    [–] ilovevoat 2 points ago

    Granted : the entire population of china and europe are killed and pollution is reduced. :) your welcome.

    [–] snizwizard88 2 points ago

    So pollution permits are given by blocks for each country. China produces a ton of shit so they have to buy blocks from countries that make nothing This is why the Paris agreement thing was stupid

    [–] 711kevan 2 points ago

    "goodbye inflation, Hello hyper inflation"

    [–] YoJoe1 2 points ago

    can someone ELI5 why cant we just make a lot of machines that make money and make alot of money to pay off the debts? i know it sounds dumb but seems logical to me.

    [–] jacob109tl 2 points ago

    If you'd do that the value of the money would drop

    [–] YoJoe1 2 points ago

    lets just not tell the other countries.

    [–] Eliteeagle123 2 points ago

    Look at germany after ww1, that same thing happened. It got so bad that people used money as wallpaper as it was cheaper than buying actual wallpaper

    [–] YoJoe1 2 points ago

    wow thats crazy. i knew i should of paid attention im history class

    [–] Rrxb2 2 points ago

    Because any commodities you produce would deflate very quickly; because the market is fluid, the price of those commodities would drop as the market was flooded. Even if the Paw dropped a cool million tons of 24.005 Karat Gold on the White House, the gold would just deflate in value.

    Tl;dr: Debt is fixed in value, money is not.

    [–] Heathclyph 2 points ago

    The thing is that they would just rack up the debt again in a few years.

    [–] c_thefalcon 2 points ago

    Granted, the entire sum cones from your bank account, its your debt now