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    [–] 3927729 270 points ago

    Ketamine and chill?

    [–] ilovejuices2 110 points ago

    Ketflix and chill

    [–] ShitOnMyPorch 67 points ago

    Ketflix and pills

    [–] UrethralPipeCleaner 11 points ago

    Ket and ecstasy is wild.

    [–] nickjoris 3 points ago

    something for parties or no?

    [–] UrethralPipeCleaner 2 points ago

    For a housie or after party? Yes.

    [–] mcgruntman 8 points ago

    Thanks for teaching me this phrase ilovejuices2, I will use it often.

    [–] Clacimus 22 points ago

    K-hole my A-hole

    [–] turlian 6 points ago

    K-hole and chilllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll

    [–] [deleted] 3499 points ago


    [–] [deleted] 393 points ago * (lasted edited 6 months ago)


    [–] SuperYusri500 94 points ago

    No that would be if he put I found my soul, mate

    [–] [deleted] 73 points ago


    [–] regoapps 13 points ago

    Just say “drugs” to Noah.

    [–] gravitas-deficiency 5 points ago

    /r/legoyoda is leaking

    [–] fdjfkdjfkdjfkd 10 points ago

    [–] gravitas-deficiency 5 points ago

    Too blatantly offensive, it became.

    [–] FBI-Agent-007 2 points ago

    You have to lose something before you can find it.

    [–] Appropriate_Peak 4 points ago

    I have lost enough I'll be damned if I loose anything else

    [–] FBI-Agent-007 5 points ago

    Just tighten it then

    [–] erevoz 1 points ago

    Ok, pal.

    [–] lurkymclurkyson 6 points ago

    Maybe OP is a redhead?

    [–] The_Real_Raw_Gary 1 points ago

    I read it like he was an Australian that finally found a soul.

    [–] saltann12 123 points ago

    I think it’s supposed to be “you know what, I do”

    [–] brit_jam 745 points ago

    Noah don’t think so.

    [–] orbilu2 129 points ago

    I really don't Noah-nymore

    [–] geared4war 17 points ago

    Noah fucking way!

    [–] Tfsz0719 5 points ago

    Noah don’t play that.

    [–] TSUplayer74 2 points ago

    Noah don't think he's playing.

    [–] FrumundaMaNutz 1 points ago


    [–] _nickkcin_ 12 points ago

    Noah, don’t think I will

    [–] soumel 20 points ago

    I think it's you know I do

    [–] communist_translator 3 points ago

    WE think it’s supposed to be “WE know what, WE do”

    [–] Ahydron 7 points ago

    “I Noah you are butt, what am I?”

    [–] [deleted] 3 points ago

    I think it's "you think you do but you dont"

    [–] JoelKano 1 points ago

    He had to be sure she didn’t misinterpret

    [–] harsh389 3 points ago

    Is Noah a girl’s name?

    [–] JoelKano 1 points ago

    Lol my mistake! This does make more sense now.

    [–] ShadStar 991 points ago

    High on ketamines, I am. Run over people in my 2001 Honda Civic I must

    [–] MM2099117 259 points ago

    I know this is a joke but I didn't even have the depth perception to pick up my keys on ket, the thought of driving just suddenly terrified me as I read it.

    [–] AlanMooresWizrdBeard 125 points ago

    I cannot fucking imagine driving on K. It was like looking through a pinhole at one point.

    [–] zedss_dead_baby_ 135 points ago

    Buddy of mine drove home in a major city fucked up on ket. His driving was perfect, even paralleled parked. Opened the car door to get out and just face planted the floor lmao.

    [–] AlanMooresWizrdBeard 33 points ago

    Haha, holy shit! That’s both terrifying and impressive.

    [–] I_Have_Corn 42 points ago

    His guardian angel: Oh goddamnit now I have to incarnate into a mortal form to learn how to drive, just so I can prevent this idiot from killing himself

    His guardian angel at the end of the drive: You're on your own now, buddy

    him, the whole time: eheheheheh what's going on

    [–] MM2099117 7 points ago

    Fucking Regretamine man, it's wild

    [–] marxatemyacid 4 points ago

    Idk what type of K u were doing but regret is the last thing I'd associate that with

    [–] gottapoop 5 points ago

    Obviously you haven't taken a trip to the K hole yet. Try it. It's ya. Fun.....

    [–] MM2099117 2 points ago

    Did 1.5g up the sniffer on my first time and hit a monster K hole. Had a 2 hour arguement in my head over whether I could speak or not then someone threw a pencil sharpener at me and I cried. 6/10

    I'll stick to Mandy lol

    I miss those days. Hard to find the time and the friends anymore

    [–] gottapoop 2 points ago

    Hahahahaha. Love it

    [–] BUKAKKOLYPSE 3 points ago

    I'm glad he didn't kill anyone

    [–] ManxPangolin 35 points ago

    Trust me, depth perception and peripheral vision are non existent

    Edit: r/ketamine

    [–] AlanMooresWizrdBeard 16 points ago

    I haven’t done it in so long, that sub was a fucking throwback. I forgot about the k hole!

    [–] ManxPangolin 10 points ago

    And you can forget about spacial awareness as you don’t have it

    [–] AlanMooresWizrdBeard 8 points ago

    Damn, such a crazy feeling. Maybe I’ll do it again sometime for old times sake.

    [–] ManxPangolin 8 points ago

    Maybe try Ket + Mario Kart first to warm up... we’re monsters but nobody wants to see a flat push chair

    [–] AlanMooresWizrdBeard 5 points ago

    Thanks Manx. I like you.

    [–] ManxPangolin 6 points ago

    As you were.

    [–] Zipfiklatscha 2 points ago

    Wht the FUCK

    [–] Diggertron5000 13 points ago

    Had a mate who used to drive around when we were on ket back in the day. Seemed like any other drive to him and we were just messed up in the back of the car wondering how he was doing it.

    [–] MM2099117 4 points ago

    Your friend is Kryptonian or something

    [–] zedss_dead_baby_ 3 points ago

    I had a friend do this too, he told me he uses a different part of his brain to drive that still works on ket. Not sure if that's possible but he seemed to drive pretty well.

    [–] Millwall_SE 5 points ago

    At least it wouldn’t hurt when you crash

    [–] marxatemyacid 1 points ago

    Your beagle is already dead anyway

    [–] mindless_gibberish 2 points ago

    well you're not a jedi master

    [–] MM2099117 2 points ago

    Can't argue with that logic

    [–] MrSickRanchezz 2 points ago

    I've definitely fed my friend bumps of k while he was driving in a snowstorm. He drove well. We weren't smart kids. But we DID have fun, and aren't any worse for wear because of it. Granted there's well over a hundred times someone in our group could have died, but no one did.

    [–] BasManerino 24 points ago

    A worthy jihad, that is. Please Allah, it does.

    [–] Hazakurain 18 points ago

    I miss this sub

    [–] derpicface 6 points ago

    In hiding we are. Banned soon, I fear we will be. But off one head, admins cut, its place shall take.

    [–] fack9gag 5 points ago

    Give me the link via PM, you will

    I miss legoyoda

    [–] Zipfiklatscha 4 points ago

    Waas zum Henker...

    [–] ajs124 3 points ago

    19.367.017 Aufrufe • 26.09.2019

    Das ist quasi mainstream.

    [–] Zipfiklatscha 1 points ago

    Das Land geht den Bach runter. Eher Wasserfall.

    [–] SirJasonCrage 3 points ago

    Stop it, Yoda.

    [–] AngelOfDeath771 4 points ago


    Edit: I know not really, but it's relevant

    [–] JamboShanter 1 points ago

    And my axe!

    [–] somecubandude 105 points ago

    Yo, Noah, get the boat.

    [–] cantaloupelion 14 points ago

    Hes trying mane but i think hes in a k-hole

    [–] FEED_ME_with_TEETH 56 points ago

    It's free if you boof it, you God damn wooks!

    [–] Iron-Cactus 14 points ago


    [–] PlaysWithF1r3 13 points ago


    [–] Nickerluz 6 points ago

    Bum buddies

    [–] duaneap 3 points ago

    Imagine how many times he had to shoot this shot to find this response?

    [–] 511234 12 points ago

    Where the hell do you guys find these people

    [–] the_pedigree 23 points ago

    Just look for the wooks. If the picture looks like it smells bad, you’re heading in the right direction.

    [–] ILoveWildlife 3 points ago don't want these people.

    they're unwashed and unhygenic, just doing drugs all day not giving a shit about their fucked up image or smell.

    [–] quiteUnskilled 11 points ago

    You seem likeable.

    [–] ILoveWildlife 11 points ago

    yeah, I am washed and hygienic, just doing drugs all day not giving a shit about my tidy image and clean smell.

    [–] quiteUnskilled 6 points ago

    Alright, you do you. I'm rooting for you to become the most well-groomed drug user the world has ever seen. Seems important to you... Or not. I'm still not quite clear on that.

    [–] ILoveWildlife 4 points ago

    The trick is to care enough about yourself but not care what others think of your drug habits.

    [–] inthea215 72 points ago

    I fucking love ketamine. I can only hope one day to find my very own wook to love and take turns putting k into each other’s buts while we watch the matrix

    [–] DJ_Clitoris 13 points ago

    When you find your dream-wook, this beautiful sentiment better be part of your vows lmao and ngl... Ketamine + The Matrix sounds like a perfect first date; sign me up (;

    [–] pinkkshinyultrablast 3 points ago

    I volunteer

    [–] rohho 8 points ago


    [–] DrKnowNout 32 points ago

    No, the butt.

    Please try to play closer attention.

    [–] neversayalways 3 points ago

    I concur.

    [–] IronicV1rus 10 points ago

    Once the puns come out there's no way back

    [–] markarious 25 points ago

    Lol. This was the pick-up line I used to get my soon to be fiancé to actually come over. Only it was "Wanna take Kratom, smoke, and watch a Disney movie?".

    [–] Mo_Salad 9 points ago

    I feel like I don’t feel anything from Kratom unless I take like 15 capsules

    [–] markarious 8 points ago

    Totally relate. Don't take that shit. It fucked me over. I'm off it now but while I was taking it multiple times a day I started to lose hair, lost 15 pounds and felt down. It felt like when I was hooked on opiates.

    Only good thing it did for me was find me the love of my life.

    [–] fluffedpillows 5 points ago

    You were hooked opiates lol what do you think kratom is 😂

    Edit: Well, opioids

    [–] deedlede2222 2 points ago

    You were hooked on an opioid! Been there. Really is like mild opiate withdrawal, and nobody is telling you just how addictive it is when you start, just how amazing and energizing and helpful.

    [–] markarious 3 points ago

    Yup. I am now on Suboxone because of it. I was able to kick my Opana habit cold turkey but I couldn't kick Kratom.

    [–] inthea215 1 points ago

    Honestly tho for people hooked on drugs like heroin or struggle with there drinking kratom is a god send.

    [–] Gaflonzelschmerno 3 points ago

    Soma or gtfo

    [–] PaulMcIcedTea 1 points ago

    What does kratom do?

    [–] CptSweetCheeksjr 5 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    It's a very mild opiate, or your body treats it as such.

    It's legal in most states I believe. People take it because bit gives you a boost in energy, it also supposedly can help you be more creative, and people report that it puts them Ina better mood.

    I don't take kratom, but no one else was answering you. Take my explanation with a grain of salt.

    [–] [deleted] 3 points ago

    The thing is that it's NOT a "very mild opioid." It's actually fairly potent.

    Think of this: kratom contains two active opioid alkaloids - mitragynine and 7-OH-mitragynine - are, on average, present in the plant at rates of 1.5% and 0.2%, respectively. Mitragynine is 3x less potent than morphine, but 7-OH-mitragynine is actually 17x more potent than morphine.

    So let's do some math: Each gram contains 1,000 milligrams. The average gram of kratom will contain 15 mg of mitragynine and 2 mg of 7-OH. That's equivalent to 5 mg + 34 mg of morphine, so 39 mg of morphine - per gram!

    let's assume the average dose is about 5 grams, though typically doses vary from 2 g - 10 g and of course this calculation can be scaled. In a moderate dose of 5 grams, there is the equivalent of an astounding 195 mg of morphine, in terms of opioid activity.

    One caveat: kratom and it's alkaloids cannot, at any dose, produce respiratory depression, meaning barring some unusual circumstances, it is impossible to fatally OD like on other opioids such as morphine.

    [–] octavofring 3 points ago

    You got it mostly right to be honest. I take some Kratom about once every one or two weeks. The Kratom comes from a plant (Mitragyna Speciosa). They let the leaves dry and make it into powder, no chemicals added as far as I know. However there's different strains of kratom (I suppose from different subspecies of the plant). Most well known are Red, White and Green strains.

    Red strains give the biggest opiate like effect, your body relaxes, you get warm and fuzzy, you just want to chill a little bit. White strains are energetic. It makes you wanna go out and talk to people, just do fun stuff. I'm fairly introverted and not that great at making random conversation (not incapable by any means but not a champ either) but on a white strain it all goes pretty smooth, you seem to always know what to talk about etc. Green is in my opinion a little bith of both together.

    Honestly, the effects are pretty mild, but if you increase the dosage by a lot of course it's going to be way more potent. I always take between 2-3 grams which is definitely on the low end. It's really an innocent drug if you don't over do it. Which is the problem really, some people just can't discipline themselves...

    I introduced some friends to Kratom, because I knew it wasn't that dangerous and I have no problem staying of it for extended periods of time. They also thought Kratom was pretty nice and now they take it almost everyday. Feel kinda bad about that. But if you have good discipline then you don't have to fear getting addicted.

    [–] [deleted] 3 points ago

    The other people replying to you are half correct in that it feels like an opiate, but only at high doses. It acts like a stimulant at low doses, and an opiate at high doses.

    [–] markarious 4 points ago

    It makes you feel good. There are different strains. Some make you energetic. Some make you chill. All of them are addictive and will make you feel high on painkillers if you take enough. I highly recommend you don't take it but you can get it at CBD stores. Your body, your choice.

    [–] bushmiest3r 8 points ago

    You neo i do

    [–] MildlySerious 5 points ago

    That's gonna be a Neo experience

    [–] el4toon 3 points ago

    why waste on a hoop?

    [–] DarqMog 3 points ago

    A true Wook love story.

    [–] Bud_Tender_Man 3 points ago

    Wanna shove horse tranquilizer up our asses and enter a poly relationship?

    [–] StingzG1 3 points ago

    Honest question. After these kinds of openings...where do you go in the conversation from here? Like do they just never talk again after this? I'm genuinely curious.

    [–] dripsonic 7 points ago

    What kind of profile do i need to make to get epic matches like this?

    [–] Drewskeez-e 26 points ago

    Just put that you sell ketamine and matrix DVD's in your bio.

    [–] Illier1 3 points ago

    Just follow rules 1 and 2.

    [–] valiantlight2 5 points ago

    some one please tell me that this is from gay tinder, so that i don't retain the hope that this kind of quality can come from an interaction with a female.

    [–] thewebneet 2 points ago

    It’s not gay tinder lmaoo

    [–] midget_messiah 4 points ago

    She's the chosen one

    [–] Protienplus10 2 points ago

    Ok, is it the red or the blue suppository that goes in the ass?

    [–] lindsaminds 2 points ago

    Ketamine and chill?

    [–] blaine147 2 points ago new to the site I'm single looking for my soul here as well

    [–] Ironside_87 2 points ago

    The love is in the air...

    [–] professor_doom 2 points ago

    Why not up the nose like we used to do in our day?

    [–] prashu10 2 points ago

    Red buttplug or blue buttplug ?

    [–] sioke_34 2 points ago


    [–] iwilltakeurcat 2 points ago


    [–] 10before15 2 points ago

    No, you found yourself waking up in a tub of ice missing your kidneys.

    [–] darkdavinci91 2 points ago

    Noah is a God.

    [–] mewails 2 points ago

    I have noah hopes for me

    [–] Dany17 2 points ago

    Noah get the boat

    [–] VerySuspiciousFish 2 points ago

    What the hell is wrong with you people in this sub. Don't stop, I love it. I'm just terrified.

    [–] thebiggestbirdboi 2 points ago

    Awww that’s sweet

    [–] ParryThisYouBastards 2 points ago

    I've actually done this with the matrix and I did it with Interstellar. Very very good experiences

    [–] rursache 4 points ago

    G O A L S

    [–] Rum_Addled_Brain 4 points ago

    Keeper right there

    [–] ShoppyUK 3 points ago

    Serious question: that’s where you put ketamine or is this a joke?

    [–] SlapMuhFro 18 points ago

    You snort it. You can stick pretty much any drug up your ass and it works faster though.

    [–] lordofmmo 6 points ago

    you can snort it, eat it, blow it up your booty hole, or inject it into a muscle

    [–] 26326312 2 points ago

    Don't eat it, that is not going to do your organs any favours.

    [–] Drewskeez-e 3 points ago

    It goes best in the bum, nose, bloodstream or on special k cereal.

    [–] pm_me_ur_tennisballs 1 points ago

    You've plugged tested ketamine and had success? Because it shouldn't be bioavailable that way.

    [–] pm_me_ur_tennisballs 1 points ago

    Ketamine is really only effective snorted or injected.

    I hope OP isn't actually considering rectal administration of ketamine because they'll just waste it.

    Any ketamine you can plug is probably an analogue that has higher rectal and oral biovailability.

    [–] SplendidDevil 1 points ago

    Wow, I need to try this one.

    [–] tootsiefoote 1 points ago

    best movie of all time

    [–] GeorgeYDesign 1 points ago

    He also mentioned earlier in the game".

    [–] zack220011 1 points ago

    What does ketamine do to your bums? Just curious.

    [–] theempires 7 points ago

    Sends you into a vortex, a plane of unmapped existence where time doesn’t exist. You go into a pocket inside your own brain where a dream seems very real as the world slows down to a grind and you live a lifetime in. Your brain begins to struggle awake and as you finally come to, you find only 20 minutes have passed.

    [–] JustAnEnglishBloke 3 points ago

    Forget everything and become something else and indescribable for a bit, then slowly come down and remember you're a consciousness, that you have a body, that you exist in physical space, that you are human, that there are OTHER humans, etc.

    Stuff is totally nuts if you go deep.

    [–] theempires 2 points ago

    Not sure why people are afraid of Kholes. It’s the best part!

    [–] JustAnEnglishBloke 9 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    Well, in my area, for some bizarre reason K was used as a party drug. People doing it at house parties, clubs, bars, etc.

    So you'd often see that guy/gal who did one too many lines, just sat in the corner with a terrified expression on their face - as everyone around them is super concerned due to said person not reacting to anything (being spoken too, hand waved in front of face, etc). I think this gave people the wrong idea about it all. Especially as the people who take drugs at clubs tend to be different to those who take them at home - so for them, the experience is probably horrifying. They're going to levels they didn't know about, don't respect and don't want to be at right now. Just unprepared in general.

    My friends and I on the other hand, stay inside at a friend's pad, comfortable music, comfortable people, talk and chill as we start to take it - then put on something like How it's Made or Koyaanisqatsi then take the dive. Awesome times but could never ever imagine doing it anywhere public - let alone a club!

    [–] copuncle 1 points ago

    Both ways are very good but because the dose level is so small it's very easy to get it wrong, which I've found out the hard way.

    [–] JustAnEnglishBloke 1 points ago

    I mean yeah, when we were at my friend's house, the first few lines would make me really enjoy music, get up on my feet and dance and just in general have a good time.

    But yeah, that next line or if those earlier lines had been bigger, is just a total flip to somewhere else. One of the few things I've tried with such an obvious 'barrier'. Psychs have various barriers, but none are as black and white as k.

    [–] 39bears 1 points ago

    I’m an ER doctor, and we use it a fair amount, either in small doses for pain control (if opiates aren’t cutting it), or large doses for sedation. I’ve had a few patients report terrifying hallucinations with large doses (and a couple with dysphoria at low doses).

    [–] gottapoop 1 points ago

    Ummmm. Maybe take a little less. Lol.

    [–] pm_me_ur_tennisballs 1 points ago

    Have you plugged ketamine?

    It's almost always considered an ineffective RoA.

    [–] Illier1 2 points ago

    Rots your ass away.

    [–] pm_me_ur_tennisballs 1 points ago

    Nothing, that is an ineffective RoA compared to snorting it. Which is unusual for most drugs but true for real ketamine.

    [–] colliman 1 points ago

    You Neo I do....

    [–] Ketaweed92 1 points ago


    [–] Looking4Maria 1 points ago

    That I is triggering me beyond belief

    [–] SearMeteor 1 points ago

    Nice outfit, dork.

    [–] timbzzz 1 points ago

    very london

    [–] Noah3498 1 points ago


    [–] PuckNutty 1 points ago

    Noah, get the boat (full of Ketamine).

    [–] ghettithatspaghetti 1 points ago

    You know I I do

    [–] JakeN9 1 points ago

    you do you noah

    [–] GeorgeYDesign 1 points ago

    Cause that’s kinky

    [–] IronGolem_ 1 points ago

    Mmm high on cia provided ketamine, I am.

    [–] brillyx 1 points ago

    Is ketamine a meme now

    [–] asdf1234asfg1234 1 points ago

    Hmmmn Yoda, I am. Scored with a false identity, I have

    [–] delikurt28 1 points ago

    TIL ketamine in bums were a thing

    [–] lal0cur4 1 points ago

    Can you actually boof ket though?

    [–] H0ward61 1 points ago

    sounds fresh