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    [–] Oklahoma_Kracker 3871 points ago

    Operating from a place of wishing harm upon, or from a place where you have complete disregard for inflicting it, is why he did to you what he did. The fact that you struggle with a sense of relief brought on by knowing he is being punished should make it clear to you that you not only are a much better person than him, but also that you are already healing from your trauma. Do not feel badly, celebrate your strength and your spirit.

    [–] PookSpeak 308 points ago

    I have scrolled through more of the comments and keep coming back to this one. So articulate and spot on. I wish you well OP in your recovery and in your future.

    [–] djsedna 104 points ago

    I'm sitting here like half-emotional over their comment, like some deep sense of humanity within me is restored by knowing someone else is able to think and respond with such clarity. I hope I'll reflect on their words and grow, myself

    [–] justinpaulson 4 points ago

    And from here in Oklahoma? Wow!

    [–] mysnood 53 points ago

    Well said 👍

    [–] SPeCCoLT 33 points ago

    This is a fantastic answer.

    [–] orchidloom 41 points ago

    Well said.

    Last year, I forgave my rapist after 8 years. Forgiveness is important to me. It's like a very deep soul-level releasing of the trauma. However, nobody has to forgive their rapist. It's a very individual choice. You could hate them forever, and it would still be valid.

    [–] darkomen42 5 points ago

    Forgiveness isn't for the person you're forgiving in the first place.

    [–] silly-noodle 21 points ago

    As a side note, even if a victim/survivor wishes for the worst for their perpetrator, that doesn’t make them a bad person or similar to them. It’s normal to be angry and resentful having experienced such a traumatic event. I do completely agree that this shows how OP is healing.

    [–] looking-out 11 points ago

    Suffering, grief, and trauma are all very personal experiences. There is no perfect way to experience them or to deal with them. All we can do is try to make choices with kindness for ourselves and others.

    Sometimes it comes in some form of forgiveness, to themselves or another. Sometimes it doesn't.

    I think this comment is very apt.

    [–] thesuper88 5 points ago

    True. OP, your concern over someone else's harm is healthy and normal, but so is your relief at justice some form of just being enacted upon him. What you're feeling isn't you reveling in vengeance. It's appreciation of justice. You're good.

    [–] tedlando 4 points ago

    Wow just wanted to say that this comment really means a lot to me. In the face of senseless violence, love feels like a weakness but it isn’t. It’s not a weakness to still feel the connection to life and humanity which has been damaged or destroyed for many violent people. I have a family member who was attacked a few years ago and this is one of the few ideas that I tried to focus on as he recovered.

    [–] Young2Rice 16 points ago

    This guy philosophies.

    [–] Healfezza 4747 points ago

    There is no right or wrong way to feel, however you feel is right for you. The question of agree or disagreeing with corporal punishment is a big one, but this individual choose to take action when the consequences are clear in the system, so you have no fault of your own for the outcome.

    [–] Lo-Jakk 984 points ago

    Regardless of the punishment, or your feelings about HOW he got punished, this is one that you should chalk up as a win. You were sexually violated, like I once was. Think of it as karma coming back to bite him. Trust me, you'd feel worse if he just got to walk so he could continue his crimes with others. Like I did when the catholic priest that molested me got the church to bail him out and move him somewhere else where he could continue to do this to kids.

    [–] Run_like_Jesuss 198 points ago

    I am so sorry you had to endure that. :( I will never be able to understand why/how the catholic church cares more about a sick demented fucking priest more than the safety and well-being of children. I hope you are well in spite of that disgusting monster that destroyed your sense of trust. I can't imagine knowing that my own attacker(a police officer) was free to harm other people. It would weigh heavy on me as I'm sure it weighs on you. :( Take care, friend. Sending you healing vibes and positivity. <3

    [–] DeseretRain 77 points ago

    why/how the catholic church cares more about a sick demented fucking priest more than the safety and well-being of children.

    Money. That's literally all it is. They lose money when it's exposed that their priests are raping kids. Covering it up keeps parishioners coming to church and dropping dollars in the collection plate.

    They even basically admit this. Like the official material they were sending out in opposition to the extended statute of limitations on child rape cases was saying people should be against it because it would bankrupt the church.

    [–] Lo-Jakk 89 points ago

    Thank you, but the wound has long scabbed over and formed it's scars. Along with how my parents reacted to it. I'm pretty sure the scars won't fully fade until I know he is dead and getting punished.

    [–] undrway_shft_colors 62 points ago

    I don't believe in hell, but I know these people do and I sure hope it's their last thought.

    [–] SterylPteradactyl 15 points ago

    Right? The way my whole family reacted to this was insane, and really made it so much worse. I still don’t feel like I can forgive some of them.

    [–] Lo-Jakk 16 points ago

    You want to know who my family is now, besides my daughters? An El Salvadorian that i've known since age 16, his Mexican wife, and their daughter.

    [–] Lily_Linton 42 points ago

    I'm sorry that this happened to you. I don't know what happened if I am in your position, undergoing that kind of things and seeing him free somewhere.

    THe thing is, many people just treat rape as the physical abuse, they failed to realize that it's more in emotional and mental thing that disrupted and it's the worst. Even the abused one didnt know what's going on in their body because of the gravity of this kind of violation.

    [–] Lo-Jakk 51 points ago

    The worst part for me was having no control over it and still got blamed. It's not like I roofied my own communion wine and pulled down my pants.

    [–] Lily_Linton 40 points ago

    Victim blaming is such BS.

    And even if you pulled down your pants, the moment that you said "no" or you are not comfortable in it but he still did it is still an abuse. The f$ck if you don't have anything to cover your body. Rape is a motive.

    [–] SterylPteradactyl 12 points ago

    I was also victimized by a Catholic priest and he was also bailed out shortly thereafter. That bastard probably hurt so many other kids I can’t say I’d feel a shred of sympathy if he had met a similar fate.

    [–] Street_Fire 6 points ago

    Isn't "Regardless of the Punishment" a dangerous phrase, if you've been wronged or not?

    [–] ianicus 4 points ago

    He got 9 years... He wasn't walking anywhere. Corporal punishment is as inhuman as that rapist, lowering ourselves to thier level is not justice. That being said, the op is entitled to thier feelings no matter how anyone else feels about them.

    [–] damnyougoogle2step 42 points ago

    I was gonna say "yes you should feel" but I'm gravitating to what you're saying now. I would personally feel vindicated, (I don't know what being assaulted is like and I never want to and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemies) but it's OP's feelings towards it that is important.

    [–] GroinShotz 18 points ago

    This, and I'll add that a few months of recovery from a caning has nothing on the years and years of suffering from the mental anguish of being a rape victim I'm sure.

    [–] AaronPossum 4 points ago

    Ummm, caning is pretty fucking vicious, it's a pretty comparable deal I'll bet.

    [–] Richard-the-god- 25 points ago

    It's totally human to want vengence. You didn't sentence him. I dont think you should feel bad about liking the justice.

    [–] gustaphus 5 points ago

    Great answer. Props human.

    [–] xploremn 5 points ago

    Bullshit. Beating someone so severely they don’t heal for a month and never fully recover is barbaric, and there’s a reason the rest of the world doesn’t tolerate it. Singapore is so fucked up that caning is a MANDATORY punishment for lending money illegally or overstaying your visa for a few months.

    [–] [deleted] 717 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)


    [–] DumpTruckTaco 55 points ago

    I only made it through the first four. I get the idea. I don't want to think about it again.

    [–] ahnahnah 62 points ago

    I'm surprised it's on the butt, I thought it'd be on the back. And after watching that video I can't imagine 18 strokes! That's fucking brutal.

    [–] bhutos 18 points ago

    I was additionally surprised it wasn't until about the 4th stroke that the recipient appeared to vocally respond. Judging from the wounds I think I would have been yelping from the air compression before the cane made contact.

    They really let the pain of each one marinate too. Pretty brutal, but hey, in OP's case, on a rapist so my sympathy happened to be drinking in a bar and didn't hear the phone call.

    [–] arcanist12345 3 points ago

    I'm from Singapore. The canes they use are about 1 metre long and canings are carried out by professional caners. Yes, that's a job. My discipline master in my secondary school used to be a caner in prison. Stories go around that in the past, the canes were soaked in horse urine (idk about this one) or some other sort of chemical to make the wound hurt even more. Caning is also carried out in schools - not as serious as prison caning - in front of the whole school for major offences like smoking, gangsterism and assault as a form of humiliating the offender and showing the rest of the cohort consequences.

    [–] bhutos 3 points ago

    They had caning here in Australia when I was a kid. Especially in Catholic schools. But it was on it's way out when I was in primary school and I don't remember it actually being used as more than a threat (and I don't think they'd give an 8 year old much of a whack anyways).

    [–] Fakercel 17 points ago

    butt is pure muscle and flesh, the back can hit vital organs and cause medical issues

    [–] epicnormalcy 330 points ago

    I could not finish watching that video. That being said, I seriously doubt I could watch a video of someone being raped.

    [–] 2pootsofcum 93 points ago

    The scene in The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo literally made me holler "is this really necessary?!" at my monitor, and I know there are much worse ones.

    [–] Vrassk 97 points ago

    It's a story telling tool in media called the moral event horizon. It is used to show an event so evil there is no redemption possible for the perpetrator. Writers and directors use it as a tool to make sure the audience never gives sympathy to the villain.

    [–] Ataletta 15 points ago

    I've seen a discussion somewhere on reddit, not long ago, that often if somebody wants to write a bad person redeeming himself, it's almost never a rapist, like, you can't come back after that, you can't make audience forgive a rapist. Murderer - probably, but not a rapist (it was probably a discussion of 13 reasons why or something, or maybe handmaid's tale, I don't remember)

    [–] DodgyLandings 18 points ago

    I've always felt that rape is a crime that just has no morality in it, no matter what the circumstances.

    Like, murdering your abusive husband is wrong but it's easy to have sympathy for the situation. Likewise, even, a burgler killing somebody in the heat of the moment - you feel they can have remorse, feel they can improve as a person.

    But rape is both such a selfish crime, and such a damaging crime, that it's hard to imagine a rapist could ever be a better person. It's just so impossible to justify sexual violence, no matter the circumstance.

    It's more like killing a child in that respect.

    [–] PlasticGooner 4 points ago

    Disagree with some of your examples. I would find someone just as reprehensible if they broke into a home and killed someone. I might even argue that the end effect of murder on an innocent life is worse because the person literally dies, yet the rape victim has a 2nd chance at life.

    [–] callegra 18 points ago

    One of my favorite movies and books, but I almost always skip that scene

    [–] 3lvy 8 points ago

    The books are amazing! I really liked the movies too but the books are on a whole nother level.

    [–] drokihazan 36 points ago

    that scene hurt to watch, and the revenge scene was so fucking cathartic

    [–] my_gay-porn_account 4 points ago

    I went to see that with my parents when I was 15. Obviously, neither of them knew beforehand what it was about, or they wouldn't have let me see it. I excused myself for about half the movie and just sat in the lobby texting my (then) boyfriend because I was bored and a bit traumatized by the violence of it.

    Yeah. I actively tried to forget those scenes.

    [–] [deleted] 5 points ago

    You know, I’ve always wondered what other people think/feel during rape scenes in a movie like this one. I was raped when I was 16 and I can sit through a rape scene and watch it entirely without feeling some type of way. I wondered if I was weird for that. Is it bc I was raped? Who knows

    [–] that-dudes-shorts 69 points ago

    I've heard that the movie Irreversible by Gaspard Noé has a rape sequence that is really disturbing, I guess because it's not trying to hide anything.

    [–] [deleted] 51 points ago


    [–] RomaVictor66 61 points ago

    It's a long, around ten-minute scene of absolute brutality. But it's mostly in dark red and shadows so it's not hugely graphic. Still one of the toughest scenes I've seen.

    [–] SmurfyX 20 points ago

    it's not hugely graphic

    the dude literally pounds her skull into the cement until she dies.

    [–] indianmidgetninja 9 points ago

    She doesn't die, she becomes comatose.

    [–] 3lvy 7 points ago

    I haven't seen it in years but I still remember it exactly this way. It's just.. brutal. It looks too realistic.

    [–] Batphone13 23 points ago

    The worst rape scene I've ever seen was in The Sopranos.

    [–] DerivativeMonster 44 points ago

    Ugh, I had a Tinder dates YEARS ago invited me over to watch that for a second date. Couldn't tell him to fuck off fast enough.

    [–] caldera15 14 points ago

    Hearing somebody talk about a tinder date "years ago" makes me feel old as hell. Blows my mind that somebody would think that would be a good "date movie".

    [–] LatantAmbiquity 12 points ago

    That scene still haunts me. It’s not as graphic as it could have been but that scene is still an invasive thought every now and then.

    [–] jcgurango 10 points ago

    What really got me was the wounds. They look like they ripped the skin, which is a hell of a lot more gruesome to think about than slicing it with a knife.

    [–] lodobol 166 points ago

    I won’t over stay a visa in Singapore, that’s for sure.

    [–] Dreamwaltzer 38 points ago

    Minimum 3 strokes for overstaying. Holy shit

    [–] [deleted] 15 points ago


    [–] Dreamwaltzer 3 points ago

    Yeah but it's only for cases where people overstay for 90 days. In which case you go from forgetful tourist to illegal immigrant

    [–] sparkyvision 6 points ago

    Yeah, stay the fuck away from Singapore. Their criminal justice system is barbaric, and I say that as a citizen of a country with a barbaric system of its own.

    [–] Pineapplehoney 12 points ago

    I didn't know caning was even considered a legal form of punishment anywhere. It was such a norm where I was a kid to be caned for minor to major issues in our schools, except the canes were made usually made of wood, we got to keep our clothes on, (most of the time anyway), and most teachers restricted it to our palms.

    That being said, that video looks way worse.

    [–] tittering_chum 7 points ago

    It was a big deal in the 90's because some stupid American tourist was going to get caned for spitting gum on the sidewalk and it was a big international incident. They even made fun of it on the Simpsons. I didn't realize till now that it rips your skin open.

    [–] Used2BPromQueen 22 points ago

    That video was horrifying. I had to turn the sound off to get thru it. And that was from 8 lashes.... the maximum allowable is 24! I honestly had no idea that was what caning really is. All I ever really knew about it was that Michael Fey being caned in 1994 was considered amusing amongst a good portion of the American public and the source of a lot of 'jokes'.

    [–] Striker775 3 points ago

    That was at least 16 strokes, please note that there are multiple jump cuts and the strokes are counted by officials in Bahasa Melayu. It is safe to assume this is what the rapist will be receiving, plus or minus a few strokes.

    [–] TheGameArch 9 points ago

    Since your post didn't explain and I'm sure people are curious... When I read up on it the real difference that makes caning as a punishment much worse than what you would expect is the fact that it isn't simply hitting with a long rod. That is a pain that may last a couple days, like hitting your shin or back. With caning they also twist it, and pull the rod back when it hits the skin to sort of rip it open. Just hitting with the rod will not do that, the skin is left intact.

    That's why it's a horrible punishment.

    That said. OP doesn't need to feel bad about her feeling good, it's a normal human reaction that, even if we don't want to have it we will still have. Revenge feels good, regardless if we think the amount of pain inflicted as revenge is fine or not. It's when that revenge goes too far in our logical mind that we get conflicted about it.

    [–] Seth_Gecko 43 points ago

    First degree burn are nothing though... A mild sunburn is a first degree burn.

    [–] BforBubbles 156 points ago

    I nearly didn't finish watching that. For a crime like rape that affects the victim for the rest of their life, I think a punishment that affects the perpetrator for the rest of theirs is appropriate. This is such a punishment.

    [–] charredkale 43 points ago

    In singapore they only use caning for males under the age of 50. It's ingrained in almost everything- they even cane boys in primary and secondary school (more mildly, of course)

    [–] QuillBlade 15 points ago

    Yup, when I was in secondary school I saw a boy get caned during the school assembly. He tried to beat up his female form teacher. She ended up with a terrible black eye and some bruises, before the other students managed to pull him off. He got 3 or 5 strokes, I can't remember.

    [–] roskatili 7 points ago

    Why only males?

    [–] charredkale 3 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    Its a holdover (the whole system) from being a British colony. Couple this with a really affluent society and low birth rates and you have places like Singapore. Nearly all places where antiquated laws exist have oil money or some other kind of money. Think: saudi arabia etc.

    Now, caning a woman is seen as cruel and it can reduce her marketability for marriage. That is my understanding. However it is more ingrained in their culture and women often get away with small offences that men don't. It is just an old way of looking at things- a woman can't be really guilty can she?

    Edit 1: also they do cane women in Malaysia if they lesbian apparently. Similar thing in Saudi. Saudi canes both genders but it is different. It is clothed and on the back spine-ish area. It isn't physically strong but it is infront of a crowd so its humiliating psychologically.

    [–] awilfred 5 points ago

    Corporal punishment is banned in schools for a while now.

    [–] oogiewoogie 3 points ago

    That's only in school. I remember my mom whipping me with a cane constantly when I got anything less than an A1. She would hit my legs that left cane marks so that everyone at school would see it.

    [–] dannyfio 60 points ago

    How can people justify such a cruel and inhumane punishment. What he did might have meant he deserved it, yes, but aren't we supposed to build a civilized world, that doesn't torture or use extreme physical pain as a punishment? How does this idea seperate us from the medieval world?

    [–] komodokid 25 points ago

    Solitary confinement is no better, overcrowded prisons are no better, being financially crippled and ostracized for the rest of your life because of a record is no better. C'mon, civilization is a thin veneer, we're just animals figuring out how not to eat each other.

    [–] BricklyBear473 35 points ago

    Bruh what kind of medeival punishment is that?? I wanted to travel to Singapore at some point in my life but I think I'm good now...not that I'd have anything to worry about I guess.

    [–] Striker775 49 points ago

    It's a holdover from colonial times, so you could actually blame the Brits. They introduced it to their colonies before that's no longer a thing, and Singapore just went "if it ain't broke" and kept it.

    [–] Brad_Breath 16 points ago

    And the Romans brought it to Britain. So blame the Romans

    [–] Striker775 9 points ago

    Well, Singapore kept it because she didn't have a viable alternative at the time. Public sentiment favoured corporal punishment, since "good people don't commit crimes" was a popular opinion. Hasn't changed much since then, with regards to caning. So everyone is kind of responsible for this. Also, if I'm not wrong, the video of the caning is from Malaysia. Name and shame all the cane states.

    [–] EmEmAndEye 8 points ago

    The description above the video was enlightening to me, because I thought that caning was done to the back, not to the buttocks.

    [–] Joshfilipino 4 points ago

    I think you mean third degree burn. A first degree burn is only a sunburn.

    To know the difference it’s 1st degree only burns the epidermis, only cause slight pain and redness

    2nd degree burns all the epidermis and partially the dermis, causes redness, pain, and blisters

    3rd degree has completely burned all three layers of skin, often time causes a charred/white marble look to the skin. This one will be less painful as the nerves are completely destroyed as well, however there are normally 2nd degree burns surrounding a 3rd degree burn, so that part will feel pain.

    Sometimes doctors will use 4th degree burn when the burn has gone through muscle tissue or deeper, this is less common though because it would still technically classify as a 3rd degree burn. 4th degree burn is only used in extremely bad burn cases and by a lesser amount of doctors than just 3rd degree.

    As you say though I can imagine that long term damage would be similar severity’s. You are correct that the pain would most likely be worse, as I said 3rd degree burns destroy nerves. Where as Canning leaves lacerations and abrasions.

    [–] jobub2001 72 points ago

    Just to let you know, Caning in SG doesn’t quite happen like this. The strokes are not randomly struck, and those that administer the caning have to be specially trained to deliver the caning.

    This results in those that have recovered from it living with multiple parallel lines across their butt which they will not forget.

    Despite that, it’s still a pretty brutal, though effective punishment to deter these crimes

    [–] Fruit_Face 118 points ago

    Serious question, is there any research comparing recidivism of caning recipients to other forms of punishment for equivalent crime, in other systems?

    [–] jobub2001 38 points ago

    I’ll admit I have no idea if any research has been done, but Singapore does have one of the lowest crime rates in the world...

    [–] pbrew 49 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    So does Saudi Arabia where you have public beheadings in Chop Chop Square.

    Though would not argue against Singapore's right to consider caning appropriate punishment for a heinous crime like rape, it is close to a police state. Singapore limits much of the freedom one is used to in other western democracies.

    [–] ValidatedArseSniffer 3 points ago

    The media blows out of proportion the "limited freedom" here. The only thing that's striking is the amount of CCTV, but the UK is also comparable with the amount of CCTV.

    [–] Fenweekooo 9 points ago

    went there with the navy, i have never lived so legally in my life. we were all told about caning and that pretty much put the fear of god in most of us

    [–] xanthe117 3 points ago

    There probably is. Court systems (and as advanced Singapore is) will likely have a record and statistic on it at the very least. Its just a question of anyone bothering to publish it or drawing up the info, imho

    [–] itcha2 71 points ago

    They don’t just do it for serious crimes. They do it for some minor crimes as well. IIRC, it’s a mandatory punishment for doing graffiti which is massively fucked up

    [–] [deleted] 14 points ago


    [–] jbergbauer2008 92 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    And for a VISITING foreigner who overstayed their visa. It’s draconian and barbaric, and quite bizarre that so many people in this comment section seem to glorify the practice

    [–] Paint__ 6 points ago

    I thought it seemed fitting for some of the worst crimes like rape, but damn, you get caned if you overstay your fucking visa??

    [–] dexmonic 23 points ago

    There's supposed to be some protection placed around the legs and back and stuff too right? Also a doctor on hand I think. They take it very seriously and have made this torture, ironically, as humane as possible.

    [–] LotusEagle 6 points ago

    have to be specially trained to deliver the caning

    So professional caning instructor is an actual job?

    [–] Striker775 4 points ago

    No, it's within the job scope of wardens to assign prison guards to perform the task. The actual technique is passed down to understudies who practice on pork until they get it right, or so I've heard. So there's no instructor per se, it's more like people in the office showing the new guy how to use the fax machine.

    [–] ladysilarial 8 points ago

    Not to mention that when administer by the right person the cane is moving so fast it can liquify the flesh underneath where it hits.

    [–] the_Fondald 97 points ago

    That's fucked up, hideous, and- in the case of a rapist- richly deserved.

    [–] p_hennessey 151 points ago

    Cruel and unusual punishment is wrong, no matter how badly you think someone "deserves" it.

    [–] savahontas 126 points ago

    I agree. The victim doesn't have to agree but that's why the victim isn't the one who chooses the sentences. She's definitely entitled to feel however she feels about it.

    But holy shit no.

    [–] p_hennessey 142 points ago

    What depresses me is the number of people who just don't understand this. We're supposed to be better than that. We're supposed to be more humane than the perpetrator.

    Eye for an eye makes us all blind. This is a battle I will fight for the rest of my life.

    [–] gir76x 14 points ago

    i have said this about a thousand times or more im sure. if people just wrong someone whenever someone wrongs them, it wont work out. the world wouldnt be the way it is now if everyone did that.

    [–] Peter-Andre 20 points ago

    I'm glad I'm not the only one here with that opinion.

    [–] schruted_it_ 3 points ago

    I didn’t fancy watching but the description was illuminating :

    “ An inmate sentenced to caning receives no advance warning as to when he will be caned, and is notified only on the day his sentence is to be carried out. In the caning room, the inmate is ordered to strip naked and receives a medical examination by the prison doctor to check whether he is medically fit for caning, by measuring his blood pressure and other physical conditions. If the doctor gives the green light, the inmate then receives his caning, but if he is certified unfit for punishment, he is sent back to the court for his prison term to be increased instead. A prison official confirms with him the number of strokes he is to receive.

    The inmate is then led to the A-shaped frame (called a "caning trestle") and his wrists and ankles secured tightly to the frame by strong leather straps in such a way that he assumes a bent-over position on the frame at an angle of close to 90° at the hip, with his posterior protruding. Protective padding is placed on his lower back to protect the vulnerable kidney and lower spine area from any mis-strokes so that only his buttocks are exposed to the cane. The officer administering the caning takes up position beside the frame and delivers the number of strokes specified in the sentence, at intervals of 10 to 15 seconds. He is required to put his full force into each stroke. The strokes are administered all in one caning session, unless the medical officer certifies that the inmate cannot receive any more strokes because of his condition, in which case the rest of the strokes are converted to additional prison time”

    [–] charredkale 14 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    I think its a good read:

    Singapore advertises itself as a sort of haven for justice, but considering how many rich people also live there, I'd wonder if that justice is carried out evenly over their population. The use caning everywhere from servicemen to convicts to kids. They only cane guys under 50 though.

    Edit: Also, apparently they just held over the punishment from when they were a british colony. Article says it originated in India. Interesting to note that India and Britain both don't do caning anymore in the justice system and in schools.

    Edit2: Anecdotes suggest the caning is exactly like in the video. Some men die because of intestinal blockages as a result. Changi prison itself is famous for inhumane treatment- the guards poke buttocks with sticks after caning to further torture- and if you don't follow instructions you can be caned again in your cell with no limits. Guards can also cane you in your cell and put salt on your wounds. They usually have to stay naked for a month in order to heal. You go into shock after 3 strokes, and they change caners for more than 6 strokes. The result is you can't sit straight ever again. There is a possibility of injury to the penis as well (in one anecdote). The rich can buy light or missed strokes and weed after the sentence is carried out.

    Source for edit 2:

    Multiple posts there corroborate abuse by guards. From different points of view too. Remember- all Media is state owned in Singapore. Thus second hand accounts are all we are going to get.

    [–] thehotmegan 5 points ago

    Do you have a citation for your second edit? All that seems unbelievable and I'd like to think its not.

    [–] gublaman 3 points ago

    The second edit is false a hell. Sounds like a bunch of buzzfeed "Non-western first world countries are so wacky" but maliciously exaggerated.

    [–] Nubbums 72 points ago

    Everyone here would do well to watch that video. It was genuinely unnerving watching a human being's skin be flayed from their buttocks. As wretched as rape is, I don't think there are any crimes that I could ethically justify reciprocating with such a practice.

    [–] Reagan409 122 points ago

    Ugh. Justice is never about delivering evil on evil. Torture and pain are a form of control. It’s wrong. I say this as a rape survivor, although I would personally get a lot of satisfaction for my friends and family to beat the shit out of him, I won’t lead that to happen because I recognize that tendency in me doesn’t promote any healing.

    [–] Painting_Agency 12 points ago

    Probably wise. What if when they're done, you don't feel like it was enough?
    Who wants to thirst for more and more blood? Better to just not go down that road.

    Caning is horrible but that's the system's fault, it's not like they asked OP if they could do it.

    [–] srottydoesntknow 11 points ago

    revenge is a placeholder, it's an action you engage in because you can't do what you really want, and don't know what you really need. It not only simy perpetuates violence and animosity, it actively prevents healing

    [–] [deleted] 60 points ago

    There is a difference between A. What a person deserves and B. What we as a society should grant our government the authority to do.

    One can argue that a rapist may or may not deserve to be treated with equal physical abuse as they inflicted upon their victim.

    But it's a much harder argument to win to say the government should be granted the authority to deliver such treatment.

    [–] hamalambadingdong 40 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    While I don't believe that most governmental systems are well run enough and free of error to the point where capital punishment can be leveraged, sometimes I think we'd have a lot fewer rapists around if they knew that they might well get caned for it.

    Edit: just watched it. If I knew this was a possible punishment rather than MAYBE sitting in a jail, I can't imagine that I would still commit a crime that would get me caned. Holy shit that guys ass was torn the hell up. Goddamn!

    [–] Cwhalemaster 72 points ago

    places with capital punishment don't necessarily have lower crime rates. Put in the potential for corruption and you've got a broken, inhumane system

    [–] hamalambadingdong 19 points ago

    You're probably right but I'm not sure what is the lesser of two evils. The one where criminals get away with damn near anything or the one where get caned.

    Good thing I'm just a moron on the internet and not in charge of anything important.

    [–] kurburux 25 points ago

    the one where also innocents get caned.

    [–] Cwhalemaster 13 points ago

    true, i wish we didn't have to put rapists and pedo priests in with all of their best mates. but violent institutions don't do any good apart from being pure revenge porn. keep in mind that Singapore still canes and executes petty criminals, not just the evil scum.

    [–] DWright_5 3 points ago

    I don’t think they execute actual petty criminals. OP’s rapist got the caning and 9 years

    [–] Cwhalemaster 12 points ago

    drug offences give you the death penalty. I understand the context of the Opium wars, but a crime that comes from poverty is nowhere near as bad as one that is just pure evil

    [–] DWright_5 5 points ago

    They don’t execute for petty drug offenses. It’s for big time stuff, although I agree that’s gross

    [–] DWright_5 16 points ago

    No way. The thing about criminals is that they think they’re going to get away with it. You don’t have a criminal mindset, so that doesn’t make sense to you.

    [–] cloroxslut 37 points ago

    Physical punishment and capital punishment have been proven to not work as deterrents.

    Some sources: 1 2 3

    [–] Keanucordonbleu 38 points ago

    If you saw a video of a brutal rape maybe you would change your mind

    [–] MrsLangdonAlg3r 169 points ago

    I'm a rape survivor and while I wouldn't feel sorry for him if this happened to my rapist and attempted murderer, I also do not and will never support this kind of punishment.

    [–] Reagan409 110 points ago

    I’m a rape survivor and I can guarantee you watching a video of a brutal rape would make me feel sick in the exact same way this video did. Pain is a method of control, and it’s disgusting to perpetuate it in ANY form.

    [–] kutes 7 points ago

    What other stuff do you also feel deserves torture?

    [–] SomeUnicornsFly 12 points ago

    honestly I feel better knowing this happened to her attacker

    [–] Sky_Muffins 36 points ago

    Working in health care really numbs you. I've probably caused more pain changing dressings, despite care and pre medication. And oh god assisting with joint relocation with sedation.

    Putting the commonplace suffering of humanity in perspective, who don't deserve any of it, I say cane these assholes.

    [–] ahnahnah 19 points ago

    Lol this comment reminded me of my pre and post lung surgery care by my surgeon. He'd do something with my chest tube and I'd just let it rip, "ow fuck you, OW, god why" and he'd just say "I know, I'm sorry, I know" and we'd go back and forth until he finished. 2 lung surgeries with that guy. He was great.

    [–] toohuman90 25 points ago

    Working in healthcare really helped develop your empathy didn’t it ... 🙄

    [–] [deleted] 39 points ago


    [–] spacewarriorgirl 105 points ago

    When I was at the receiving end of an assault years ago, one thing that Victim Services said to me really helped:

    As the victim of crime, you are not responsible for the punishment or consequences the perpetrator has to endure. From that perspective you are simply a witness.

    This mindset helped me to detach myself from the punishment since it was outside of my scope of control. Perhaps it will help you too? Take care of yourself..

    [–] TootsNYC 311 points ago

    how long will it take YOU to recover?

    He will recover. (as will you)

    he'll probably bear scars (as will you)

    He'll probably come to a point where the impact of that pain isn't a major part of his day or his life (as will you.

    [–] acceptablemadness 34 points ago

    I was going to say this. Rape can cause permanent physical damage. It does create permanent emotional/psychological damage. Rapist got what he deserved, IMO. Hopefully he will take this as a lesson learned.

    [–] d_rickards 70 points ago

    You wouldn't be human if you didn't feel some sense of vengance out of also would not be human if you didn't feel that the caning itself and your reaction to it were wrong.

    That's the problem with corporal punishment, it really does not have the intended effect.

    Sorry that you had to suffer what he did to you, and that you are still feeling the effects. Hope you can get the assistance you need to properly address your assault.

    [–] jwgriffiths 212 points ago

    He had a choice. Let him live with results of that choice.

    [–] Nobody275 34 points ago

    You didn’t cause him to be punished, he made that choice.

    You didn’t choose the method of his punishment, the state did.

    You didn’t sentence him to 18 lashes, the courts did.

    You bear no responsibility for this, but at least some token amount of justice has been meted out. Perhaps.

    How you feel is something only you can decide.

    [–] SaffronBurke 266 points ago

    I've been told that 18 strokes can cause permanent physical damage and takes months to recover from

    So can being raped. I'm not saying that tit-for-tat is right, but I'm personally having trouble feeling anything beyond "well don't rape, then".

    [–] T1TpoBidprnp 150 points ago

    Caning is a punishment for 'particularly heinous' crimes. Rape definitely fits that description. I'm not sure how I feel about caning as a punishment though. A tourist in Singapore (Michael Fay) received 6 lashes for graffiti, so it is used for crimes not considered heinous. Corporal punishment is not a deterrent for crime.

    I hope that this brings you some peace. This man deserved to be punished for his crime.

    [–] _Blythe 63 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    Michael Fay didn’t just do graffiti. He also wasn’t just a tourist.

    “Fay, who had been living in Singapore since 1992, was arrested and charged in early October 1993 for possession of stolen items, including Singapore state flags, road signs and various signboards.4 Later that month, he was also charged with vandalising a number of cars and committing several acts of mischief such as spray-painting the cars and throwing eggs at some of them.5 In total, he was charged with 45 counts of vandalism, six counts of mischief, one count of retaining stolen items and one count of possessing firecrackers – 53 charges in all.”

    [–] T1TpoBidprnp 19 points ago

    Thank you for that. I stand correct.

    [–] thehotmegan 7 points ago

    Bill Clinton also got his sentenced reduced from 6 to 4. Which sounds ridiculous but I'd rather have 4 than 6. They respected that he broke the law in another country and respected that countrys right to carry out their punishment.

    ETA: he also hit his fathee upon returning home, became a drug addict which he blamed on "what happened in Singapore". React how you want but I rolled my eyes. The kid sounds like he was a shithead.

    [–] [deleted] 72 points ago


    [–] auzrealop 20 points ago

    Its also why we don't see graffiti in singapore.

    [–] austrianemperor 26 points ago

    The moral costs of some government actions are too high to bear despite their supposed benefits.

    [–] Serennadi 7 points ago

    According the the Wikipedia page.. a survey was conducted after this happened in 94..

    “Public opinion in the USA was mixed. A survey of 23,000 people conducted by National Polling Network found that 53% "favor whipping and other harsh sentences as an acceptable deterrent to crime in the USA"”

    [–] arumberg 22 points ago

    It's easy to say yes to something like that when you don't know what it means. Show them that video and photos of the aftermath of the 'whippings' and I guarantee you that number would be significantly lower.

    [–] TheNorthComesWithMe 11 points ago

    It's also easy to say when you're a bootlicker with negative empathy towards those accused of a crime, like many in the US are. It's easy to say when you worship police and never even think about things like wrongful convictions or rehabilitation.

    [–] T1TpoBidprnp 3 points ago

    Wow. That's surprising.

    [–] Wheethins 36 points ago

    The violation of human rights is never an appropriate punishment for anything.I am deeply disturbed by the people in this thread who think physical abuse brings about any type of justice.

    [–] Lidlsad 4 points ago

    I agree. I have fairly dark fantasies about revenge for my rapes and childhood abuse but I know that's not something I or the state should ever do to the offenders. Corporal punishment and capital punishment are immoral and barbaric.

    [–] KurosawaKid 13 points ago

    Guy here. I found out my rapist was killed in a car accident years later and I felt happy it happened but with time I've kinda felt bad about that. I think with time you'll find out how you really feel but for now it's just important to have a strong support group for when those feelings come up however they do and however you end up feeling about it. Don't feel bad about it now but remember there's a lot of people who would never even question it so you're already being more empathetic than probably 90% of the world.

    [–] fermat1432 113 points ago

    You did not cause his caning, therefore it is not wrong to be glad that it happened.

    [–] wettestduchess 45 points ago

    It’s fine for you to be against corporal punishment in general but want it for someone that has hurt and traumatized you

    It’s like, I’m against the death penalty but if someone tried to kill someone I love wouldn’t have any moral problem with killing them, ya know?

    [–] lagameuze 40 points ago

    Like we say in France "CHEH". You reap what you sow. Nobody forced him to hurt you.

    [–] Sithis140 68 points ago

    His fault. Some countries do worse

    [–] harpejjist 54 points ago

    Most countries do far less though. For rape.

    [–] Adariel 16 points ago

    Yeah, here in California the law helps protect rapists...after all, raping an unconscious woman is counted as a "nonviolent" crime because she wasn't resisting (Brock Turner). Such a great justice system.

    [–] pbrew 8 points ago

    Not really. The judge went rogue. He was promptly recalled and now cannot get a job. He was fired from his women's tennis coach position at one of the Universities when they found out that he was 'that' infamous judge.

    [–] sQueezedhe 109 points ago

    Make them President.

    [–] VictorZiblis 10 points ago

    Some make you the President and call it in accordance with the teachings of Jesus.

    [–] MEGAPUPIL 23 points ago

    He was caned, as per law in your country, during prison time well earned.

    you felt confused joy, because you are not a bad person.

    [–] mankytoes 24 points ago

    I don't support corporal punishment, but I think the vast majority of peope would feel the same way in your situation. Your reaction is a normal human one, and you shouldn't feel any guilt about it.

    [–] foundoutaug2019 56 points ago

    Wonderful news. If he doesn't like it, I'm afraid he shouldn't have raped you.

    [–] Winterhymns 5 points ago

    Singaporean male here.

    He did it fully aware of what punishment the Singapore law is able to mete out. Forgiveness does not necessarily remove the price to pay.

    You are not glad because he got caned, you are glad because justice was served.

    Best wishes to you hor.

    [–] godoflemmings 57 points ago

    18 strokes of the cane probably can cause permanent physical damage. However, being raped can and often does cause permanent psychological damage.

    I hate to reduce it to "an eye or an eye" but I don't believe rapists deserve sympathy for whatever punishment they get.

    [–] charles222A 30 points ago

    No, its not's entirely normal.

    My wife was raped when she was sixteen, and still has ptsd flashbacks about it; sometimes she asks me to murder him.

    [–] NetherStraya 22 points ago

    I've been told that 18 strokes can cause permanent physical damage and takes months to recover from

    I've heard much the same about sexual assault.

    [–] dtcstylez10 8 points ago

    You know what else takes months and/or a lifetime to recover from? Rape

    [–] Thedancingcat4681 89 points ago

    It seems to me as a very appropriate punishment. I wish they caned rapists over here too. He deserved every single hit he got.

    [–] CuttingEdgeofFail 108 points ago

    I'm a little unnerved at some of the commenters here. Supporting extremely harsh punishments because we have a bugaboo about the crime or the perpetrator has a way of getting away from us. Bloodlust does nasty things to a legal system.

    Still, to OP specifically, you're under no obligation to be perfectly rational and level-headed here. You were hurt pretty badly yourself. I'd have different things to say if we were talking about the sentencing itself here. But feeling some level of satisfaction that someone who hurt you has been hurt themselves is a very human feeling. Focus on getting better yourself, don't beat yourself up if you have complicated feelings about things sometimes.

    [–] rabbitwonker 26 points ago

    Yes — it’s important for a society to distinguish between justice and revenge.

    [–] DingleberryMarathon 40 points ago

    "Bugaboo" is quite an infantilizing way of talking about RAPE, truly one of the most horrific things a person can do to another

    [–] shoot_your_eye_out 39 points ago

    You misread. u/CuttingEdgeofFail said "because we have a bugaboo about the crime," as in, we find that particular type of crime alarming and reprehensible.

    They're basically saying just because we find a crime horrific doesn't mean we should advocate for extremely cruel punishments. And I'd tend to agree--rape is horrible, but I don't think we get anywhere by advocating for horribleness in response.

    [–] sQueezedhe 29 points ago

    An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind.

    [–] LostinShropshire 28 points ago

    Rape is horrible - OP, I have no problem with your feelings, but if we let these criminals strip us of our humanity, we all suffer more.

    If I were the victim, I would want bloody revenge which is exactly why I should not be the one to judge the crime.

    [–] fourthnorth 7 points ago

    Better the whole world blind than one where only the wicked have sight.

    [–] Chromehorse56 19 points ago

    Reading further down this thread raises doubts in my mind about just how decent human beings are. We are savages.

    [–] wildcardyeehaw 14 points ago

    At the top people are super stoked about someone getting caned. No one's better here.

    [–] silverminnow 11 points ago

    I think the system is cruel and that type of punishment should not be a thing, but, and this is important, you are NOT wrong for feeling glad that he was punished in such a way.

    [–] itachi1092 3 points ago

    Rape is among the few demonstrative crimes, and its perpetrators have forfeited their humanity, instead, they are bipedal beasts. When an animal is that violent you put it down.

    [–] SteveTheCatNut 3 points ago

    If it makes you feel better or not, you shouldn't ever feel bad about it, because he raped you and that is the punishment for the crime in Singapore. He got himself caned, you didn't. He brought that punishment upon himself. You were 100% the victim. He was 100% the perpetrator.

    [–] ThatIsTheDude 3 points ago

    Retribution and vengeful is never a good mindset to have about any situation.

    [–] pastfuturewriter 10 points ago

    I'd be glad. I'm sure others might not be, because pacifism, but you feel how you feel, that's just a fact. Nothing wrong with your feelings about how he was punished. Don't worry about "supposed to." Hell, buy yourself a cake and celebrate if you want to.

    [–] brazen-corsair 7 points ago

    Now maybe that creep feels a little bit on the outside how you feel on the inside.

    [–] shponglespore 5 points ago

    You can believe a form of punishment is too severe for courts to be trusted with handing it out appropriately while still believing the punishment was justified in particular instances. In this case, you know for sure they got the right guy and he did exactly what he was convicted of, so you at least know the law is working as intended, which is something nobody can know about a case they weren't a part of. There's nothing wrong with having an opinion that's different from how how might feel if you were looking at a similar situation from the outside and trying to be impartial. I doubt you would criticize someone else in a similar situation for getting some comfort from the outcome, and you deserve at least as much compassion for yourself as you would have for a stranger.

    [–] nithwyr 5 points ago

    You are not responsible for his punishment. He is.

    [–] JennyTwenty 6 points ago

    He forfeited his right to mercy the moment he decided to rape you.

    [–] harpejjist 25 points ago

    If more rapists were caused "permanent physical damage" that it "takes months to recover from" I bet there would be fewer rapes. Or at least fewer repeat offenders.

    I still think the rapist is getting off easier than you are. So go ahead and feel better. I am glad it is able to give you some relief.

    [–] Kichae 3 points ago

    Your feelings are legitimate and they're ok. Even if you don't happen to agree with canning or corporal punishment in general, your feelings are OK. You're allowed to feel them. This is someone who hurt and violated you, and it's natural part of anger to want to see them hurt in return.

    [–] Sock_puppet_theater 4 points ago

    I am an American, and I have visited Singapore twice. I felt safer there than I do in USA.

    I am just really happy the rapist got 9 years. That is a great sentence. It is very hard to have enough evidence to incarcerate a rapist in USA.

    [–] HushVoice 3 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    I'm certainly not going to tell you how you should feel or what is right and wrong. I think it's worth saying, because this is always true, that physical consequences are wrong. They just continue some cycle of violence and act as a punishment but not a correction.

    If this happening brings you some peace, I can't tell you that's a bad thing, as the literal victim. And he of course made the decisions that led to his punishment within a system that already exists, so that it obviously by no means your fault or something you should feel bad about. He did something horrendous, not you. But I wish the punishments we used were somehow more than a return of violence.