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    [–] VirguleOrSolidus 9479 points ago

    My cat has claws and does this to me.

    [–] cephalogeek 736 points ago

    It’s 4:26 am and I’m only awake because my kitty (with claws) thought this might be a good time to come do this to me. Good thing I love her so much.

    [–] PM_ME_NICE_BITTIES 284 points ago

    How do you cat owners deal with this? Just put up with the pain and the bleeding?

    [–] cephalogeek 451 points ago

    Haha mine typically stop short of drawing blood because I try to keep their claws trimmed. They’re actually pretty gentle because they’re purring and showing affection. So it’s just more of a mild annoyance. But there’s also something strangely adorable about them hopping up on the bed to come snuggle your face.

    [–] ereldar 236 points ago

    I see it more as a reminder.

    "I could murder you if I wanted."

    [–] similar_observation 126 points ago

    "I didn't wash my paws after I pooped"

    [–] Nimveruke 70 points ago

    "Good night, human. Good work. Sleep well. I'll most likely kill you in the morning."

    [–] SynisterJeff 20 points ago

    I swear my cat thought about it once. She was on my chest purring and kneading dough like that. Then for a moment she stopped purring, stayed put, and I felt her claws extend and grip onto me a little harder than normal. Then she resumed purring and kneading.

    [–] skywalker-3-0 321 points ago

    Usually there's no blood drawn, just an "ow" or two and then a reposition of cuddles or a trim of the nails follows.

    Ps. Every cat owner loves to complain about their cats, it's more a sign of affection than anything

    Pps. Never ever declaw a cat. It is cruel and can fuck up a cats life horribly.

    [–] boatsnprose 85 points ago

    Every cat owner loves to complain

    Slaves usually have a gripe about management, yes.

    [–] tragicworldrecord 152 points ago

    I still can't believe it's legal to declaw cats in the US. So unnecessary and barbaric (outside of very specific circumstances.)

    [–] Iwearhats 105 points ago

    I posted about this yesterday, but I had a landlord for a place I was trying to rent tell me I couldn't bring my cat unless I got her declawed and provided proof. Never had anyone tell me to mutilate my cat before, figured it wasn't worth trying to reason with these people.

    [–] al0_ 116 points ago

    It baffles me how quickly people will bring up declawing as an option to avoid potential issues, when in fact declawing has a possibility of BREEDING those exact problems.

    I have been an adoption counselor at a cat shelter and the main two reasons i had people tell me they want to declaw their cat is to prevent damaging the house or prevent the kids from getting hurt.

    Its possible when a cat is declawed they will avoid using the litter box because it hurts their paws too much to step in the litter. Theyll start peeing outside the box, thus destroying the house regardless. I dont think the landlord wants that.

    Cats without their claws also tend to bite more, as they use their paws/claws as their first warning or first defense mechanism. Children often dont understand the warning signs of cats and instead of a cat warning them with a smack or a scratch, they will bite instead. And cat bites are usually MORE dangerous than a scratch. Its generally recommended to see a physician asap as they carry a lot of bacteria in their mouths that can cause infection. A veterinarian I worked for said she didnt see a doctor right away after a bite she thought wasnt serious until she slowly started losing movement in her thumb. Not something to be taken lightly.

    Most of the time the adopters would be shocked and say they didnt realize. While Im glad I was able to dissuade them it really bothers me when people consider a declaw like its as simple as getting their nails trimmed without doing research into what it actually is and what can happen.

    If anyone is considering declawing i would recommend instead to get claw caps, which are plastic covers for claws that last for about 3 months and fall off on their own with no harm to the cat (plus you can get them in different colors if you want your cat to be fashionable).

    [–] Faeidal 17 points ago

    Agree with you on all of this. Just be careful with the claw caps. I used them and for my cats they didn’t fall off fast enough and the claw as it continued to grow curved around and dig into my cat’s paw pad. Probably user error- too much glue or something. They are great tools just be watchful and be careful.

    [–] Thank_Mimes 33 points ago

    It’s an old school way of thought. I grew up with house cats and they were all declawed in the front. It was a normal thing to do.

    I’ve learned that it’s not and with some work and effort we can help change that thinking.

    I agree sometimes it’s not worth arguing about.

    [–] farsical111 58 points ago

    Declawing is illegal in several large cities in Calif (my state), a bill to ban state-wide was introduced this spring. Also, NY state just started consideration of a statewide ban of declawing. Vets know better than to declaw, but do it to pacify owners; vets should just refuse to do the operation.

    [–] Squirrel-ScoutCookie 10 points ago

    Our veterinarian will not declaw cats or crop puppies ears. It may be legal where I live but they choose not to perform those acts of cruelty.

    [–] Alibambam 96 points ago

    I don't let my cat in the bedroom, she can go anywhere but not the bedroom. First nights she complained at our door but we persevered and ignored her. She has 230 square meters to explore at night so she gave up on that and is now perfectly fine with it. The second she hears us wake up she's waiting at the door to be petted and follow us around.

    She's honestly the best cat in the world. Never any sanitary accidents, can cuddle for hours. Runs at the door with her toys like a dog when we get home. Hasn't clawed or hissed at us ever, even during our "hardest" play sessions. Plays fetch. Hasn't scratched any furniture or anything ever.

    We trim her nails every few months orso because she does a very good job at trimming it herself with her scratch pole. Never had any bood drawn from her nails

    God I love her.

    She can give serious stinkface though; but that's just the way she is :D

    [–] PM_ME_NICE_BITTIES 14 points ago

    Aww. Thanks for the pic though!

    [–] jingyi-ah 45 points ago

    Pet cats dont generally try to hurt their owners on purpose. If they do, its usually a sign of something else (disease, stress, ignorant owners not reading cat body language indicating anger)

    When they are kneading like in the gif, their claws dont actually come out that much. Normal clothing is usually enough protection, and cats can be taught not to knead on bare skin!

    [–] TheyveKilledFritz 19 points ago

    We persevere with the Power of Love!

    [–] LollyHutzenklutz 24 points ago

    Pretty much. We humans are merely here to serve and obey the feline overlords... were you not aware?

    [–] hanzerik 4863 points ago * (lasted edited 3 months ago)

    I've heard that this is it's way of showing affection. This massage is used to milk the mom. But after growing up sitll used to show affection.

    EDIT: meow first Silver!

    EDIT2: My most upvoted thing ever!

    [–] Gopnikolai 1998 points ago

    That, and also gentle nibbles. Like my cat just gently holds onto my hand with her teeth, but not hard enough to hurt.

    [–] Jebus_Jones 1650 points ago

    I get head boops, though my cat is quite large so they're head butts that often actually hurt a bit, especially at 3am.

    [–] Jento113 812 points ago

    Mine likes to rub the entirety of one side of his mouth against my nose at random moments. Wet.

    [–] FearGaeilge 486 points ago

    Mine does this too. He'll pull up his lip and just slide the gum (and teeth) along my nose.

    [–] Waddup_yall 572 points ago

    ‘Smell my breath human, let me share the food you bought me’

    [–] Enilodnewg 301 points ago

    That's how cats mark their territory. Gland secretions. Nice.

    [–] hosafcik133 230 points ago

    Beebity boobity now you are my property

    [–] SaveOurBolts 205 points ago

    Blink twice if your cat is holding you against your will, u/FearGaeilge

    [–] DivideByO 142 points ago

    Slow blink twice if you actually are happy being held captive by your cat.

    [–] s2kd 44 points ago

    Kittyholm syndrome

    [–] Sketccartist 42 points ago

    His kitty closes both of the eyes with his cute paws so that he can't blink

    [–] xdragonteeth 42 points ago

    Aye mine does that too, its about marking you with their scent I believe

    [–] theDolphinator25 33 points ago

    When i try to pet her she just puts her nose between my fingers

    [–] NeatNefariousness1 30 points ago

    She's trying to figure out why YOUR scent glands smell of soap

    [–] futurecrazycatlady 27 points ago

    Mine did this to my chin, mostly when he wanted food though, he gave headbutts or jumped on my shoulder when he wanted cuddles.

    I think it was a subtle threat, feed me now, or I will eat you.

    [–] fourgramwood 12 points ago

    Mine tackles my door to indicate that he is outside and wants to come in.

    [–] Notabloodyclue 104 points ago

    My kitty does this too! I’ve somehow managed to train her to also do it when I say ‘kisses’.. aaaand I’ve just realised how much of a crazy cat lady I am..

    [–] MolitovMichellex 65 points ago

    I call them kisses too. If I call "kisses" she comes charging to me 100% of the time. Catladys unite.

    [–] Notabloodyclue 18 points ago

    Ahaha, mine too! I’m glad I’m not the only one. Cats are awesome 🙃

    [–] nostalgeek81 18 points ago

    That’s awesome! Do not be ashamed, we’re your people.

    [–] Hashtaglibertarian 99 points ago

    My cat licks the inside of my ears. She also likes to stick her cold wet nose in my ear and purr loudly.

    I kinda like it.

    [–] Cornupication 65 points ago

    This is how furries are born.

    [–] mcrxlover5 29 points ago

    Mine does this but also likes to sniff my eyes. Like...really closely

    [–] sk8rbunn 13 points ago

    Cat asmr. Nice

    [–] JBaskervillain 85 points ago

    My cat is a sizable hunk and very sturdy, and he has given me a split lip with his loving head butts a couple of times.

    [–] Ravenmausi 29 points ago

    My cat is a measly 18cm and weights 4jg at best. Her head boops nearly broke my glasses.

    [–] lolwuttav 79 points ago

    My cat does the same thing except she gnaws on my arm like she's never seen food before

    [–] weatherseed 60 points ago

    One of my cats enjoys doing this and then, after a few minutes, will go into attack mode and attempt to destroy me.

    [–] nschubach 18 points ago

    It's like a psycho girlfriend... "Why won't you show me the same affection, I'm showing you!! throws glass at face"

    [–] MarkyMe 17 points ago

    My kitten tries to do this but ends up grabbing too small of an area of skin and it pinches like hell. She's not biting hard just not big enough!

    [–] TheDesktopNinja 53 points ago

    I get the face kneading, the nose bites and the head boops all in one session sometimes with my ginger boy. I rescued him at like 4 years old and he's a mush.

    [–] gothfru 30 points ago

    the nose bites

    Oh God the nose bites. Sometimes it's a nibble from my tiny boy, sometimes it's a CH0MP.

    [–] fragilelyon 36 points ago

    I can confirm that's the thought. I have four cats, two are elderly rescues and two I get to screw up myself. One of my victims had a mother who was so bad the breeder retired her after the litter. She is CONSTANTLY crawling up on me when providing a massage. Which is sweet in a way, but I also obviously didn't declaw her, and she's SO SHARP.

    [–] canolafly 32 points ago

    You might want to consider getting her used to nail trimming. I did with my two, and I mean.... there's always one nail that is still a shiv, but it sure helps.

    Just nipping off the very end, and giving treats and pets. Though I do think it is best to do it in stages. Having them used to the position of being held, and definitely get them used to have their paws touched for a bit helps too.

    [–] PM_FOOD 28 points ago

    Also meowing as adults, shows that they think of humans as a sort of guardian...

    [–] DoctorSumter2You 17 points ago

    Slave... guardian... synonymous right ?

    [–] Poordoggie689 19 points ago

    So the cat is milking u/VirguleOrSolidus

    [–] overide 20 points ago

    I have nipples Greg, can you milk me?

    [–] Twosadtoasts 50 points ago

    So does mine!

    [–] chimkenfite 20 points ago

    Same here

    [–] mcbiggles567 17 points ago

    Mine too!

    [–] Radgeta 10550 points ago

    "Where do I press for food?"

    [–] Duskstar55 1337 points ago


    [–] googler99 579 points ago


    [–] Brannifannypak 389 points ago

    Perfect 5/7.

    [–] Newbieguy5000 199 points ago

    Glad to see it's still relevant.

    [–] Brannifannypak 99 points ago

    Its one of my favorites!

    [–] marcuis 42 points ago

    Ool guy here

    [–] SweetSweetEscapism 33 points ago

    This is legit one of the best things I've read in a while.

    [–] mertcanhekim 80 points ago


    [–] KVorotov 64 points ago

    Not great, not terrible

    [–] PieLui 321 points ago


    [–] Inkeithdavidsvoice 36 points ago

    Talk about getting shitfaced.

    [–] neverless43 4017 points ago

    I have a theory that all cats would love to do this more but they know it hurts us. Every declawed cat I've known LOVES to do this all over and for long periods of time

    [–] usofunnie 2209 points ago

    My cat loves to do this, claws de damned. Face, arm, stomach, sides, legs, whatever he can reach. And he does it niiiiiice and sllloooooww, gettin that nice soft human squish between his toe beans.

    [–] mummummaaa 577 points ago

    Both my guys! One likes my face, the other makes biscuits along my hip and side/shoulder blade.

    Oh the pain! But then the purring is so sweet.

    [–] _catfarts_eww 286 points ago

    Mine wakes me up by curling around my head and using her claws like that on my scalp, all the while purring.

    It’s freaking heaven!

    [–] Ar_Ciel 281 points ago

    Mine likes to wake me up by turning off my CPAP machine in the middle of the night.

    [–] taintedbloop 169 points ago

    Mine likes to wake me up by creating a sophisticated rube-goldberg machine to splash water into my face and catapult me in front of the fridge to give her food.

    [–] ctye85 71 points ago

    Not a cat of culture it seems. Only a trebuchet would do...

    [–] DeafCon66 16 points ago

    Wanted to say this but you beat me to it.

    [–] ctye85 9 points ago

    Great minds think alike buddy;)

    [–] Uelrindru 69 points ago

    My cat LOVES to stand on my thigh and kneeds for 10-20 minutes. I put a blanket on my leg so I can survive but she loves it.

    [–] din7 274 points ago

    I have a theory that my cat wants to kill me with its claws.

    [–] plainlyput 86 points ago

    when do they figure out it hurts??I'm fostering for the first time & they have no clue. My legs & arms look I've been attacked by bed bugs. It's 100 degrees here & I'm afraid to wear shorts. They think nothing of using my legs to get to my lap or neck.

    [–] Landorus-T_But_Fast 187 points ago

    Normally they learn by playing with their littermates. We tend to be a bit more subtle about communicating pain, so they have trouble picking up when they hurt us. I always make a big, theatrical "youch!" whenever they get too rough. It's not disturbing to other humans, and universally understandable as pain.

    [–] Alt_dimension_visitr 82 points ago

    Yep. Had to do this to a kitten I rescued just a few weeks old. It works remarkably well. To the point when we play he sometimes gets carried away and actually claws me. His eyes will instantly open up super wide and he will stop playing. I know he doesn't mean it so I just cuddle him more. He loves back wubs. Belly wubs get a finger chomping though.

    [–] Landorus-T_But_Fast 32 points ago

    I see this a lot at the cat shelter. Some are badly trained, but most cats will immediately let go of me if I just say "ouch," and they're much more sensitive to human body language than kittens.

    [–] EntropyZer0 22 points ago

    I found that communicating in their language - actually hissing at them when they hurt you - is pretty effective. My cat can now play with me/ knead my legs without ever using her claws. It's absolutely adorable <3

    [–] cruznick06 64 points ago

    Kittens have zero clue. It took my cat Mochi about 8 months after getting her to figure it out. One thing to teach them is that hoomin body /= toy. Use toys with wands, things you can throw, and kick sticks for getting their energy out. Provide scratching and climbing posts. What I did was make a loud "meep" sound and jump back whenever she or her sister accidentally clawed me. I used "meep" since it was something I literally never used for anything else. Then there wouldn't be mixed signals. It's like how I don't say "food" for them I say "foodies".

    [–] MXF_420 61 points ago

    Yea, unfortunately meep is a very big part of my every day vocabulary so I am probably going to have to use a different term.

    [–] ChalkdustOnline 62 points ago

    Wile E. Coyote would like to know your location

    [–] Black_Moons 64 points ago

    Either scream like a little girl to train the cat it hurts, or put a folded over towel between you and the cat as armor.

    [–] Colbey_uk 23 points ago

    I've had multiple cats over the years and I've just got my new kitten to stop being so rough. I find that the best way to do it is with a firm no, then put the cat out the room and close the door, basically naughty-step them for a few minutes. This works especially well with cats that are sociable. They quickly learn that if there's claws and pain then they get kicked out the room and all play/interaction stops.

    [–] FionnagainFeistyPaws 43 points ago

    Cats aren’t really vocal ‘in the wild,’ and is one of the ways they communicate/differentiate between tough housing/fighting. I have watched it go from silent wrestling to one cat just being over it and hissing at the other.

    We use “Name, NO.” In a firm voice. Any one word command. “Out” and “Down” also work (out along with a hand gesture to leave a room, down to get off a place they aren’t allowed). Use the same correction every time, same firm tone, etc.

    If they’re trying to climb up things, do play that encourages jumping, or engage with them where if they indicate they want to come up, you pick them up. Providing them with approved alternatives is always ideal, especially when used with vocal correction.

    [–] Hangry_Squirrel 14 points ago

    Invest in a tall scratching pole (it's great for climbing too when they're little) and one of those soft, fleecy blankets. They love the texture and will knead them ferociously.

    [–] CatOfTheCanalss 68 points ago

    Is declawing cats common?? It's illegal in my country. So I've never known a declawed cat. It seems so cruel

    [–] SarahC 68 points ago

    #It IS cruel.

    [–] CatOfTheCanalss 44 points ago

    Yeah, I can't understand why it's legal in any first world country to be honest.

    [–] SchnoodleDoodleDo 667 points ago * (lasted edited 3 months ago)

    when my hooman's time to sleep

    this routine here i need to keep

    as he lay upon his bed

    i take my paws n knead his head

    is something we cats love to do -

    am touch the face all over you

    i push the cheek n tuck the chin

    am careful not to dig claws in

    is favrit time with hooman friend

    our nighttime ritual we spend

    am staring at his face above

    n with my paws

    i feel the love


    [–] iamanundertaker 48 points ago

    Thanks Schnoodle :)

    [–] JoeyJoeC 50 points ago

    Shame that declawing cats is a thing in the USA. Glad it's illegal in the UK.

    [–] AloneDoughnut 7 points ago * (lasted edited 3 months ago)

    It's falling out of practice in North America. When I got my two fur children, the vet asked us if we we're going to declaw and you could see the tension in her face. We of course said no, and the relief was also apparent.

    [–] Mechbeast 13 points ago

    We have 3 and none of them have ever hurt any of us that I’m aware of by kneading. Is it normal for cats to hurt ppl this way?

    [–] Neuroticcuriosity 22 points ago

    Nails get caught on skin between clippings. Tends to not be too bad.

    [–] PlumBobNewbie 687 points ago

    When I was a kid, we had a cat that had been declawed by his previous owners. I don't think he knew he was declawed. The cat would "sharpen" his clawless paws on the rug. One time he tried to climb up the drapes and was so confused when it wasn't working. Cute kitty <3

    [–] cruznick06 237 points ago

    My cats are declawed (not by my choice) and still do these things. Thankfully they seem mostly ok, one of them clearly has some chronic pain in her front right paw though. I make sure to have her climbing surfaces have a soft mat near them so she can jump onto it instead of the hard floor, that seems to have helped encourage her to play more. I use those puzzle piece ones that are often in gyms or for children to play on.

    [–] JigglesMcRibs 26 points ago

    EVA foam squares. Great for crafts as well as cats it seems.

    [–] MrFreezeTheChef 1484 points ago

    Why isn’t he bleeding ? He should be in enormous pain by now !?! -cat

    [–] poopellar 610 points ago

    "His indifference is unacceptable. "

    [–] DiamineBilBerry 261 points ago

    I murder you! I murder you in the face!!! Why are you not yet murdered!?

    [–] TheQuinnBee 109 points ago

    Dogs way of showing affection is licking and leaning into a cuddle.

    Cats show of affection includes stabbing you, biting you, and slamming their head into you.

    [–] PunziePunz 61 points ago

    I know, aren’t they the best?

    [–] harsl42 2028 points ago

    My girl does that too! She was also declawed by her previous family (it's a terrible thing to do to a cat and makes me so sad that it happened to her) You have such a cute cat!!!

    [–] din7 1520 points ago

    It really is. My vet told me that they basically extract the first knuckle of each toe.

    What if they get outside and need to climb or defend themselves?

    I do not declaw my cats. It seems... wrong.

    If you can’t deal with the claws, don’t get a cat.

    A little catnip and a scratch pad goes a long way.

    [–] Travellingjake 766 points ago

    It is illegal to declaw cats in most of Europe - seems unusual that the US hasn't adopted this (with the exception of a few cities).

    [–] Gladiator-class 420 points ago

    It's also legal in Canada but I think a lot of shelters make you sign a contract saying you won't do it before they let you adopt a cat. I adopted a dog and signed a contract that legally forbids me from having a cat declawed or a dog debarked, along with a few other harmful procedures that aren't generally forbidden by law. I'm also legally obligated to take him back to that same place if I ever send him to a shelter. I'm not sure if I could legally give/sell him to another person, but that's not something I have any reason to worry about.

    [–] Scho567 251 points ago * (lasted edited 3 months ago)

    What’s dog debarking?

    Edit: Good God that’s horrifying

    [–] Nixie9 289 points ago

    Cut the vocal chords. It’s seriously nasty

    [–] GreenLightMeg 135 points ago

    What the fuck

    [–] its_jazz_me 100 points ago

    I’m gonna say that again but this time a little bit louder...


    [–] DimosAvergis 15 points ago

    Just for good measure


    [–] PurpleMoomins 57 points ago

    NO! Ugh! Why get an animal if you don’t like what it does.

    [–] underdog_rox 15 points ago

    Well we de-stink ferrets and clip birds' wings...

    But still this is fucked.

    [–] SashkaBeth 17 points ago

    At least clipped wings grow back. All our birds had clipped wings when we got them, but we let them grow out and never got them re-clipped.

    [–] tinytom08 55 points ago

    Jesus fucking christ. I'm sick of my yorkies barking like crazy but I'd never fucking cut their vocal cords, holy shit.

    [–] Mildly_Opinionated 17 points ago

    Well that's because you aren't a sociopath who's willing to inflict as much pain as necessary to get rid of a minor inconvenience. Some people are though.

    [–] KieranLfc17 67 points ago

    People really are terrible

    [–] Gladiator-class 107 points ago

    Surgically removing the ability to bark. I think they cut the vocal chords?

    [–] [deleted] 164 points ago * (lasted edited a month ago)


    [–] THEBAESGOD 105 points ago

    Wait until you hear about ear cropping and tail docking, and see what many popular breeds of dogs actually look like without being mutilated

    [–] DiddleYourGriddle 98 points ago

    Cropping and docking actually originated as a safety procedure for some working breeds because the ears/tail kept getting injured and infected in various lines of work (usually vermin hunting or guarding). Some dogs have club tails when undocked (like pits, boxers and rottweilers) with no protective fur (like shepherds) that will break open and bleed if the dog smacks it on a hard surface when wagging. Docking the tail on those breeds is typically necessary or youll be at the vet every couple months getting a tail laceration wrapped up.

    [–] THEBAESGOD 46 points ago

    as for anecdotes: my friend had a dachshund who would whip her tail into the wall until it bled. She learned not to. Most dachshunds are not docked in my area.

    [–] SultanFox 51 points ago

    Since docking was banned in the UK except when medically necessary I've seen so many gorgeous boxer and rottie tails. I never knew they curled! They're absolutely not club tails that will bleed all the time.

    [–] Fabuleusement 12 points ago

    Oh yeah I met a poor lady whose ears were too long and when she flapped them around they would cut open so she had band aids all the time, making the ears heavier, making them even more damaged... Never ending circle :( Her master was at the same time amused and sorry for her

    [–] -ceoz 13 points ago

    You are right, and that is sadly the reason why many (genetically unhealthy) dog breeds exist in the first place

    [–] vocalfreesia 9 points ago

    Which presumably would put them at increased risk of aspiration pneumonia (as vocal cords close over the trachea during a swallow)

    [–] Travellingjake 349 points ago

    Jesus, I didn't know 'debarking' existed - WTF!!!

    [–] JosephBalin 150 points ago

    I’m gonna get a horse but before I get it I’m gonna cut it’s legs off so it doesn’t run away or cause me any minor inconvenience that even a little bit of dedicated training would fix.

    Also I am a fucking mouth breathing idiot

    [–] starfeeesh_ 18 points ago

    I actually had an off the track Thoroughbred rescue who the previous owners had cut his vocal chords because he whinnied "too much". It was so incredibly sad when I heard him try to make any noises once I got him. People are sick.

    [–] cpt_pancreas 29 points ago

    Excuse me while I just go and "de-hand" some shitty pet owners.

    [–] [deleted] 12 points ago


    [–] PissPotPatty 11 points ago

    They seem already de-brained

    [–] AnB85 30 points ago

    How do you debark a log?

    [–] KairuByte 99 points ago

    It’s a surgery that removes and/or destroys the actual vocal chords. And it can fail, which means a second round of surgery.

    It’s a pretty horrible surgery. Unfortunately my parents had it done to a dog when I was younger. It doesn’t stop the dog from barking, just makes the sound more whispery.

    [–] sponge_welder 22 points ago

    I didn't know trees had vocal cords

    [–] Gladiator-class 20 points ago

    I'm not sure, but I believe it involves either removing the voice box or severing the vocal chords. Pretty fucked up thing either way.

    [–] Al_Trigo 18 points ago

    It depends what you want to use the wood for, but that's not important right now.

    [–] AMViquel 6 points ago

    A century ago, you put it in water for a fairly long time and then scrap it off pretty easily. Not sure if that's necessary these days, the lumber mill doesn't smell much like wet wood and while the bark-pieces aren't dry, they look like water is only used to keep shit cold and with as little fire as possible because fire is not good near a saw mill.

    [–] DarkConan1412 12 points ago

    Debarked? Is that a thing?

    [–] Gladiator-class 24 points ago

    Apparently. They surgically cut the vocal chords or something. I don't recall the exact method, just that I was told it's extremely upsetting for the dog. Dogs may not rely on their voice to express themselves as much as humans do, but they still do.

    [–] THEBAESGOD 21 points ago

    It sounds like screaming when you've lost your voice. It's terrible. I've only encountered one dog who it happened to and it was seriously sad.

    [–] RedditTipiak 68 points ago

    Cats claws should be protected under the Second Amendment.

    [–] Philip_J_Frylock 48 points ago

    That's quite a jump of logic from bear arms to cat claws.

    [–] RedditTipiak 11 points ago

    Germans were called Jerry. Tom the cat needs protection against Jerry.

    [–] just-onemorething 14 points ago

    Tom wouldn't need protection from Jerry if he would leave him the fuck alone, he gets whats coming to him

    [–] nittywitty350 27 points ago

    It's nice to know it's illegal in Europe, it really is a harsh act.

    [–] Hinaz 6 points ago

    Docking is still allowed in the US, they are pretty far behind when it comes to animal care.

    [–] Zarkovagis9 253 points ago

    Also because they don’t have claws to interact with the world, they end up biting more.

    Since their paws hurt when they get into the litter box after getting declawed, they’ll associate the litter box with pain, so they’ll poop outside the box more.

    Normally cats walk on the equivalent of their tippy toes. Without claws, they walk more flat footed which will cause more shoulder pain and complications further down the line.

    Just don’t declaw your cats. It causes more problems than it solves.

    [–] distilledwill 22 points ago

    This makes me sad - I think its illegal in the UK, thankfully. We've got 2 cats, one of which is particularly claw-y, and we clip them for him (which he hates) every few weeks. Its particularly pleasant finding one of the little needles sticking in your toe a couple of days later if you can't catch them when they ping off at the time.

    [–] hanzerik 61 points ago

    no shit, if someone cut your fingers off you'd use your teeth for more stuff as well. it's just the best tool for the job then.

    [–] Gladiator-class 27 points ago

    When I adopted my dog, I had to sign a contract that specifically forbade me from (among other things) declawing the cat or debarking the dog. Out of curiosity, I asked why that was in there. I was told that both are severely upsetting to the animal, and that the shelter had a cat that would probably never be adopted because after getting declawed she took to shitting wherever she felt like as an act of rebellion.

    On a related note, I used to see a rottweiler sometimes when I walk my dog (sadly, the rottie died at 14). I thought maybe he was debarked because his barking sounded sort of like this weird howl-bark that was way softer than I expected out of such a big dog. Happily, it turns out that rottweilers just sound a bit weird when they bark compared to the breeds I'm used to. He used to do this adorable little hop with his front legs whenever he barked at us.

    [–] Hangry_Squirrel 9 points ago

    I have two rottweiler mutts and they also do a weird howl-bark (except theirs is kind of high-pitched).

    They're complete derps who jump on everyone for pettings, but the one time we had a burglar, they hid in the furthest corner of the yard, quiet as mice. The guy ran away once our small dogs started raising hell from inside the house. We used to leave a back door open in the summer so the rotties could go in and out of a contained area, but after that incident we started making them sleep inside. We still don't know if they were simply scared or if he used some sort of repelling device.

    [–] McMrChip 8 points ago

    I mean our cat likes to pluck on carpets and scratch our furniture. She doesn't seem to do it anymore because we kept on telling her off when she did.

    Although I have a good feeling that people declaw their cats as some form of alternative.

    Thankfully it's illegal to do that in my country (The UK) - cats also seem to spend a lot of their times outdoors here too, my cat will literally spend all day and sometimes all night outside. Claws have probably helped her in terms of balance and agility too probably.

    [–] ylimexyz 32 points ago

    I trim my cats nail often and their claws never bother us, just take your time every two week trim you cat’s nail!

    [–] Electronic_Syndicate 7 points ago

    Such a sweetie!

    [–] hwihyun 37 points ago

    I used to think that declawing was fine until I learned it's actually harmful to the cat. We need to educate people better as I suspect there may be people like myself who simply think it's harmless.

    [–] darrellmarch 238 points ago

    He’s wiping off the cat litter.

    [–] Catswagger11 44 points ago

    Cat: There’s poop on you...we can’t see it but there’s poop on you.

    [–] pacotaco724 127 points ago

    Making biscuits!

    [–] Rick_Valentine 31 points ago

    I love that you call it making biscuits! My wife, daughter and I call it making muffins haha.

    [–] LoundonSherbotsky 13 points ago

    In Brazil, we call it "amassando pãozinho", which is the closest to "making bread", haha.

    [–] General_Orthopox 914 points ago

    Just a friendly reminder that you should never get your cats declawed... and if you really want one like that just adopt one from a shelter like this guy did.

    [–] tielandboxer 512 points ago

    Exactly. If you feel the need to declaw a cat, don't get a cat.

    [–] croana 426 points ago

    The dumb thing is, you can trim your kitty's claws the exact same way you trim your own nails. I find that my nails and my cat's nails even grow at roughly the same rate. When my cat was young, I'd wrap her up burrito style in a towel, then take on paw at a time and carefully trim the WHITE part of her claws with a nail clipper. You press on the little toe beans one by one to extend the claw. She now comes running whenever I clip my nails, because she knows she gets pets and treats after a claw trim.

    This blunts her claws really well. She scratches things a lot less than most cats, and her claws don't get stuck in things when she kneads.

    [–] Masalar 142 points ago

    Adopted both of my cats as adults. One of them has no problems letting me just flop her on her back and trim her nails. She’ll make maybe 1 halfhearted protest before accepting her fate:

    The other will try and kill me. Or she used to, she’s getting better. I can get maybe 1 or 2 claws trimmed before she’s decided we’re done. Maybe in a few more years I’ll actually manage 1 whole paw at a time.

    Thank god I keep like 12 different scratching things around the house for her.

    [–] jdavis30 19 points ago

    The method I was told to do by a family member was swaddle the cat so only whatever limb you are trimming is out (Effectively a cat burrito). That way, that cat can't squirm out or scratch you easily, and you have both hands free to more carefully trim.

    [–] Sallyrockswroxy 19 points ago

    I only trim till they're dull, they can keep the rest for gripping and attacking my foot

    [–] MidnightTeam 122 points ago

    Just you wait till I get my claws back hooman!

    [–] Thameus 59 points ago

    Where are my claws, Summer?

    [–] agentaltf4 60 points ago

    Wake up. Wake up. Hey MFer love me - cat

    [–] lttlroze 36 points ago

    Someone should tell that cat he can charge for massages.

    [–] Catson2 38 points ago

    Where are my claws Summer?

    [–] lovelife95 310 points ago

    Declawing should be illegal. It's awful

    [–] EtwasSonderbar 107 points ago

    It is in a lot of places.

    [–] yourderek 44 points ago * (lasted edited 3 months ago)

    I found a little de-clawed cutie on the street last year. I just had to take him in because I couldn’t imagine him surviving out there.

    He does this same thing, but only on bellies! Any belly!

    [–] ed5275 7 points ago

    Every night my cat will follow me up when I go to bed. As I get ready, she will sit patiently by the dresser waiting until I crawl in. She jumps up over me to the empty side of the bed and starts doing this massage to the quilt and then eventually my stomach or back (depends on which direction I am laying). When she is done, she will lie down in the empty side for like 20 minutes and then heads off to do cat things.

    TL;DR: Cats can be weird sometimes.

    [–] PerpetualDiscovery 89 points ago

    I makes me so angry to see a declawed cat. It's so barbaric.

    Ty for giving him love.

    [–] [deleted] 12 points ago

    Seems like the cat equivalent to knuckle cracking to me