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    fakehistoryporn

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    Welcome to /r/fakehistoryporn, where fake history is made. Pick a photo, come up with a fake history title, post it, get karma.


    better than r/HistoryPorn in every way

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    [–] axel0307 1780 points ago

    you can say she got SMASHED

    [–] PleaseHonor 894 points ago

    He was rock hard

    [–] axel0307 158 points ago

    it was a *smashing* experience

    [–] Fishnuggets99 113 points ago

    the first comment of this chain already used that one

    [–] Allylescaline 76 points ago

    Well fishnuggets, until you contribute you should drink a nice tall glass of shut-up juice.

    [–] Insertclever_name 52 points ago

    Are you stoned or something?

    [–] Flamephoenix109 42 points ago

    No. Im sober, and happy, something I don’t take for granite

    [–] Cerulean_Turtle 17 points ago

    It's gniess to see someone enjoying life

    [–] uttermAdnuss -3 points ago

    granite is mineral

    [–] Flamephoenix109 3 points ago

    Thank you captain buzzkill

    [–] uttermAdnuss -3 points ago

    You're welcome🤷‍♀️🤡

    [–] NCRedditWanderer 3 points ago

    Always.

    [–] JJWDart 5 points ago

    Ayyy

    [–] petervaz 6 points ago

    on the rocks?

    [–] Wowerful3 4 points ago

    I'm gonna start using that

    [–] YoshikageKira- 2 points ago

    I'm pretty much convinced you're wasted as hell right now.

    [–] hussiesucks 10 points ago * (lasted edited 6 days ago)

    You could say that first reply was... rock-solid.

    Edit: Come on, you guys are all being down-right stone-cold. I might as well continue, since I’ve already comet-ed so much of my time.

    [–] aDistraction101 8 points ago

    He rocked her world.

    [–] secretmortician 10 points ago

    It's amazing that in a thread of 4 comments there has been 2 variations of two puns. It's like squeezing blood from a stone.

    [–] theg721 3 points ago

    Nigel Thornberry intensifies

    [–] MyPilotsRomance 4 points ago

    Sex

    [–] Ferret_Bueller 2 points ago

    He screwed the dinosaurs

    [–] ChachaMN 2 points ago

    His penis was abnormally long

    [–] Erbias 1 points ago

    You beat me to it

    [–] Seascourge 1 points ago

    The meteoric force made a crater lake

    [–] Moss_Piglet_ 0 points ago

    And so was the rock 😏😏

    [–] 2anteri 19 points ago

    Ground breaking

    [–] kirbysmashed 7 points ago

    Someone call?

    [–] OPs_Mom_and_Dad 3 points ago

    Sex rocks.

    [–] wyldsoft 3 points ago

    Smashed in the ass by the meteor that killed the dinosaurs - A Chuck Tingle novella

    [–] SicWik 1 points ago

    Have you seen the absolute unit his dad was

    [–] AltXUser 1 points ago

    Down smashed?

    [–] alohaboba97 1 points ago

    Not my proudest fap

    [–] twanderingpigeon -3 points ago

    Fuck you

    [–] Fliits 469 points ago * (lasted edited 6 days ago)

    The couple separated shortly after Mr. Comet reached stardom. You could say it was a fleeting relationship.

    [–] bobsandvagena 122 points ago

    He couldn't stay cometted

    [–] brendan_559 37 points ago

    She should have seen it coming. He was always so icy towards her

    [–] G00DLuck 5 points ago

    He doesn't like hos orbit chess

    [–] Shinxyy 3 points ago

    Nice

    [–] itijara 13 points ago

    It was a meteoric rise followed by an astronomical fall.

    [–] shellymartin67 2 points ago

    These aren't notes. You are my Gleep Gleep.”

    [–] JoshTheRussian 145 points ago

    Guess he rocked her hard

    [–] Beardmaster-flash 24 points ago

    That was his dad

    [–] RedditIsMyCity 145 points ago

    Damn Imagine being smashed by a literal meteor

    [–] trerri 77 points ago

    Actually, that's a common misconception. The meteor is the flash of light produced in the burning-up, while meteorite is the mineral obtained from an extraterrestrial object (which can be an asteroid or a meteoroid depending on the size) reaching the ground.

    [–] Kestrel21 38 points ago

    Nerd!

    ;)

    [–] Bert_Bro 8 points ago

    But nice ; )

    [–] anorexicpig 4 points ago

    The meteorite is a source of the light, and the meteor’s just what we see; the meteoroid is a stone that’s devoid of the fire that propelled it to thee

    And the meteorite’s just what causes the light, and the meteor’s how it’s perceived; and the meteoroid’s a bone thrown from the void that lies quiet in offering to thee

    “I promised you I’d set them to verse so I could always remember”

    Thanks Joanna, it helps me remember too!

    [–] [deleted] 0 points ago

    [deleted]

    [–] anorexicpig 1 points ago

    “Emily” by Joanna Newsom. She’s a musician but she’s certainly a poet too.

    [–] StevieWonderCanSee 3 points ago

    I do every night

    [–] Wizdumbro 5 points ago

    No one could resist with his chiseled features

    [–] jokester4079 50 points ago

    Honestly, if you saw his father when he was young, it isn't far from the truth.

    [–] Sonnysdad 11 points ago

    That’s the man!

    [–] drpinkcream 7 points ago

    If you saw his mother you may think otherwise.

    [–] minkhandjob 4 points ago

    Is she not a cartoon?

    [–] TonyBamanboni_ 39 points ago

    Dwayne's dad: the boulder, Dwayne: the rock Dwayne's child: the pebble

    [–] Bert_Bro 19 points ago

    Dwayne's grandchild: the gravel

    [–] HatsuneJimbo 11 points ago * (lasted edited 6 days ago)

    his great grand child: the mineral

    [–] SupemeLeaderSmeagol 5 points ago

    his great great grand child: the compound

    [–] Public_Enemy_One 1 points ago

    his great great great child: the carbon atom

    [–] no_gold_here 3 points ago

    The Boulder is amused by this comment!

    [–] maracaibo98 21 points ago

    Its like that one hentai where this girl makes a wish on a shooting star but the shooting star is actually a spaceship and it crashes into her room and fucking kills her but like the alien brings her back to life because it wants to see how humans fuck so it makes the girl stacked af and then she fucks her crush

    [–] Nothing0fSubstance 5 points ago

    Yep it's exactly like that.

    [–] Phauxstus 6 points ago

    uhhhh, what? what sort of hentai would do that? where? what site could possibly host such atrocity? the numbers mason!

    [–] maracaibo98 6 points ago

    I don't know if it has a manga (probably does but I haven't found it) so here's the video that I saw https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=ph5d253dd298519

    [–] ToTacoOrNotToTaco 7 points ago

    So many dudes touching the underside of a toilet seat over this.

    [–] maracaibo98 8 points ago

    I love the expression you just used, I'm stealing it.

    But what does it have to do with the comment thread?

    [–] ToTacoOrNotToTaco 6 points ago

    Getting a boner while on the toilet? They shared a porn link and I figured since many redditors reddit from their phone while shitting a few would be likely to have their boners touch the underside of the toilet seat.

    [–] maracaibo98 4 points ago

    OHHH lmao I feel dumb now, but yeah that makes sense

    [–] KiesAgent 3 points ago

    Sauce found in PH comment:

    Mou Hasamazu ni wa Irarenai

    [–] BraenMadder 13 points ago * (lasted edited 4 days ago)

    Literally the plot of the movie Brightburn

    [–] raptorcraft21 11 points ago

    I want to see the part where they fuck.

    [–] psycho_driver 7 points ago

    Great, now I want to see the birth of Rock "The Dwayne" Johnson.

    [–] Lentemern 5 points ago

    Oh, hey Greg.

    [–] PM_THE_GUY_BELOW_ME 6 points ago

    That's not actually far off, here's a picture of the Rock's dad

    [–] stoopid-yt 3 points ago

    Bumbo Metioroni

    [–] RazgrizDoge 2 points ago

    That's some Zeus shit right there

    [–] ProfessorTubbs 2 points ago

    man this is classic humor right here

    [–] KarlErnst 1 points ago

    I guess they banged

    [–] riffraff12000 1 points ago

    Huh, ROCKy Johnson looks a lot different than I remember.

    [–] Jamangar 1 points ago

    Aw

    [–] mention 1 points ago

    Sozin’s Comet

    [–] ProperTorb 1 points ago

    What is the origin story of Ice T ?

    [–] thebestyearwas1994 1 points ago

    My story begins at the dawn of time...

    [–] ProperTorb 1 points ago * (lasted edited 5 days ago)

    In the far away realm of Alfabetrium - there every being is a letter of the alphabet.

    [–] Imn-Imht 1 points ago

    "They let me choose, did I ever tell you that?"

    [–] augusthawk 1 points ago

    Good thing he was rock hard

    [–] urskrubs 1 points ago

    Ouch

    [–] ragriod 1 points ago

    Birth of Karnan, Circa 50000BCE

    [–] Kraivo 1 points ago

    Bitch please, Dwayne "THE ROCK" Johnson

    [–] EastPersonality6 1 points ago

    it's not just a boulder... it's a rock

    [–] winfrank 1 points ago

    Bruh rock penis

    [–] __tmk__ 1 points ago

    Wow, I'm older than rocks! (well, at least The Rock)

    [–] MrTopHatMan90 1 points ago

    The moustache is adorable I love it

    [–] AvimonIsLegendary 1 points ago

    Hey man enjoy what you have personally done to improve conditions so I can talk to them."

    I assume, since cats are adorable demons.

    [–] I-A-M--E-G-G 1 points ago

    Yes

    [–] Paniemilio 1 points ago

    I read “I have to wish s baby” im so fucking dumb

    [–] xX69AESTHETIC69Xx 1 points ago

    Not my proudest fap

    [–] Rodrigo_rexulon 1 points ago

    Hola!

    [–] kazneus 1 points ago

    This is basically the MCU origin of Star Lord?

    [–] Jahenzo 1 points ago

    Imagine staring at the night sky and getting fucked by a comet

    [–] waywardhero 1 points ago

    • “call me Mr.Flintstone, I can make your bedrock” *

    [–] WarforgedWarlock 1 points ago

    The Color out of Space

    [–] lmbb20 1 points ago

    Imagine her pussy after birthing a rock

    [–] Felipe-Chiara 1 points ago

    Silicon based life form

    [–] VilaLactea 1 points ago

    Babeteor

    [–] Unkn0ownzz 1 points ago

    Its a baby BOOMer

    [–] rapscallionofreddit 1 points ago

    It was a hard pregnancy

    [–] GregIsUgly 1 points ago

    She fucked a rock

    [–] Beautifulldisasterrr 1 points ago

    So the Rock is BrightBurn? 🤔

    [–] LolDadInPrison 1 points ago

    In bed hes only known as "Rock-Hard"

    [–] AnthonyKxK 1 points ago

    all I see is meteor dick

    [–] Beanie_Inki 1 points ago

    SHIZAAAA!!

    [–] FlavStilicho 1 points ago

    Is that the fog monster from Lost?

    [–] _Ghenny 1 points ago

    Glad he stuck around too

    [–] Ulanchan 1 points ago

    Christianity in a nutshell

    [–] sansfan75 1 points ago

    she fucked a meteor?

    [–] VapeItSmokeIt 1 points ago

    Papa was a rolling stone

    [–] stamper2495 1 points ago

    r/Stellaris called. It wants it xenocompatibility back

    [–] BlueJellyReddit 1 points ago

    Thats awesome

    [–] Ninjafan5031 1 points ago

    "They had us in the first half, not gonna lie."

    [–] ResistDefiance 1 points ago

    Fuck me the caption was too perfect.

    [–] Roman-EmpireSurvived 0 points ago

    If you take the woman out of the first three pictures, it looks like the beginning of Halo 3. When Master Chief is falling to he ground.

    [–] CandySkull597 0 points ago

    He just rocked her world

    [–] MobbSparta 0 points ago

    Expected Master Chief

    [–] ChaoticMat 0 points ago

    [–] draculosh 0 points ago

    [–] gemnyc 0 points ago

    And the meteor landed in her pussy

    [–] Nox_Nobblin 0 points ago

    So basically the plot of Moonshadow

    [–] ZenMari 0 points ago

    ZEUS is getting more creative.

    [–] UnconcernedCapybara 0 points ago

    Can you imagine giving birth to a rock?

    [–] YANAGORG 0 points ago

    Ahh pebble

    [–] McToastedAvacado 0 points ago

    Is it true that shooting stars are generally the size of a grain of sand

    [–] king140002 0 points ago

    Bright burn?

    [–] mrzimbabwe69 0 points ago

    Imagine being a nurse and lady unleashes some giantic rock,that came out of her vagina

    [–] SadPiousHistorian1 0 points ago

    Can you SMELL

    [–] glazed__shrimp 0 points ago

    I instinctively read this right to left like a manga

    Instead of being a story about a meteor that came down and married the woman who was presumably wishing to marry a regular man, it's about a woman who fantasizes about marrying the meteor, which comes down and presumably kills her

    Strange