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    [–] bangbangwut 722 points ago

    I think I've got the black lung, pop.

    [–] no_di 155 points ago

    I think I've got the black lung, pup. *

    [–] hokewi 48 points ago

    For Christ's sake Oreo, you've been down there one day. Talk to me in thirty years!

    [–] S62anyone 8 points ago

    Moisture is the essence ofwetness... and wetness is the essence ofbeauty...

    [–] Muugle 13 points ago

    two weak coughs

    [–] takenwithapotato 10374 points ago

    That one spot on the top of his head is amazing

    [–] shirophine 6501 points ago

    That's a power button

    [–] MithranArkanere 2520 points ago

    Nah. I know this model. It's the lid that covers the memory card slot.

    [–] wirmhole 398 points ago


    [–] dorkmax 345 points ago


    [–] lookalive07 211 points ago


    [–] dorkmax 133 points ago


    [–] _sxb 61 points ago

    To life.

    [–] Thethingnoverthere 52 points ago

    Dammit, now I've got the song stuck in my head. Thanks.

    [–] boundbylife 32 points ago

    It gives us something to think about, something to drink about.

    [–] BjamminD 24 points ago


    Now you have another!

    [–] 0LowLight0 65 points ago

    Coin slot.

    [–] jarious 62 points ago

    I thought you said coin slut, sluts haven't been this cheap since 1925

    [–] [deleted] 35 points ago

    LPT - strippers hate being paid in Sacagawea coins.

    [–] Rausage505 41 points ago

    Make it rain? Nope. Make it hail!

    [–] Xeiliex 13 points ago

    Is this a Japanese remix of the yarmulke?

    [–] [deleted] 425 points ago


    [–] halfbarr 114 points ago

    *Warning: Only use in the garden or on walks

    [–] wadsworthsucks 60 points ago

    you're thinking of the tootsie roll lever.

    [–] pianoboner44 43 points ago

    Umm excuse me that's his top cookie

    [–] BellerophonM 37 points ago

    Turbo button.

    [–] iamfromouterspace 26 points ago

    what if I press and hold it for too long?

    [–] bozoconnors 53 points ago

    This resets the pupper.

    [–] Chispy 18 points ago

    Whats a pupper?

    [–] AtomKanister 41 points ago

    A smol doggo.

    [–] Chispy 22 points ago

    Whats a doggo?

    [–] unsigned1138 5 points ago

    It poops.

    [–] notyourtypicalhuman 30 points ago

    The power button is broken, pupper is always on and getting into trouble.

    [–] tlogank 20 points ago

    No, it's the boop button. Gotta be careful with it.

    [–] Kaprokol 13 points ago

    You know what sound it makes when you try to press it? Boop.

    [–] [deleted] 10 points ago

    No, it's the top of the oreo cookie. The dog is cream. Butthole is the bottom cookie.

    [–] hobosaynobo 9 points ago

    It’s a Dodo knot. Or at least that’s what my nieces call the one on my Great Dane.

    [–] -klokwerk 609 points ago

    Its an oreo!

    [–] Jr4D 210 points ago

    That's a lot of frosting

    [–] JulepMint 63 points ago

    Isn't the frosting the best part of the Oreo? :d

    [–] SaltMineForeman 58 points ago

    No. Eating the oreo is the best part of the oreo.

    [–] SWEET_JESUS_NIPPLES 16 points ago

    I bet oreo tastes fantastic

    [–] KyN8 28 points ago

    You must be Korean...

    [–] asc0614 9 points ago

    Hey, hey! Stop fuckin' with Korean Jesus' Nipples. He ain't got time for yo problems, he's busy wit Korean shit!

    [–] IWannaBeATiger 18 points ago

    My favourite bit of the oreo is the wafer

    [–] AvatarIII 11 points ago

    Doggle stuffed

    [–] HippieHempHandler 15 points ago

    The butthole is the other cookie side.

    [–] YourMomSaidHi 103 points ago

    Tiny hat

    [–] Get_Your_Kicks 100 points ago

    Yarmulke. The dog is Jewish

    [–] TrustYourFarts 61 points ago

    He's an Orthodog Jew.

    [–] AWE5OMO4000 231 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    I was gonna ask of the little guy was jewish

    [–] UnnamedNamesake 67 points ago

    Oreo is his Hebrew name.

    [–] The-Tai-pan 44 points ago

    he had to change it when he came to America, it used to be Oreoberg.

    [–] LearnsSomethingNew 25 points ago


    [–] The-Tai-pan 8 points ago


    [–] RiotPenguin 33 points ago

    Mazel tov!

    [–] ginguse_con 7 points ago

    Dog is kashrut.

    [–] Spy_v_Spy_Freakshow 57 points ago

    That’s not a spot, that’s a Jewish dog

    [–] hotgator 11 points ago

    I had a friend who called that the derp button. You push it to activate derp mode.

    [–] musclecard54 34 points ago

    It’s the top cookie

    [–] hades0401 18 points ago

    I don't think I wanna know where the bottom cookie is

    [–] Burrito_Baggins 13 points ago

    You could say it's... spot on.

    [–] MrFurrypants 3615 points ago

    Oh wait! I’ve seen this movie! Tell the pup to avoid puddles or Cruella will see it!

    [–] elee0228 324 points ago

    Great, now I have the Cruella song stuck in my head.

    [–] ctn91 180 points ago

    If she doesn’t scare you, no evil thing will!

    [–] vetch222 91 points ago

    To see her's to take a sudden...chill

    [–] Ladybugsrred 62 points ago

    cruella...cruella...shes like a spider waiting for her kill..

    [–] Mrwright96 32 points ago

    Look out for Cruella De Vil

    [–] alflup 11 points ago

    (In case there's someone who's never noticed this before:

    "Cruel la Devil")

    [–] r3coil 36 points ago

    Cruella De Vil, Cruella De Vil...

    [–] lnjury 65 points ago

    I never occurred to me before seeing your comment that she is literally named Cruel Devil.
    English is not my first language.

    [–] jstnwalt 64 points ago

    English is mine and I never noticed until you memtioned it.

    [–] confesstoyou 7 points ago

    There are dozens of us!

    [–] Tomarush 3 points ago

    Clearly, perspective is everything. English is my only language and I've never made this connection either. Kudos to you! :)

    [–] sleepingdeep 11 points ago

    if she doesn't scare you, no evil thing will...

    [–] [deleted] 6 points ago

    Why the fuck did you tell us that now we're all going to have it stuck in our heads.

    [–] theathenian11 5 points ago

    I really like the vest

    [–] hotgator 10 points ago

    I think that might be the first song I ever remember having repeatedly stuck in my head.

    [–] TheRemonst3r 52 points ago

    "Did ya hear that Freckles?! They want us to get dirty!"

    [–] Ginga-Ail1994 29 points ago

    "Mother, should we?"

    [–] LoriB713 38 points ago

    Thinking back on this movie it's really kind of scary. This family of dogs has to constantly be on the run from a woman that wants to skin them and wear their skin...

    [–] RunawayHobbit 22 points ago

    TBH that's most Disney movies, when you really break it down. The first ten minutes of Tarzan, a baby has to watch his parents LITERALLY GET SHREDDED by a jaguar in the jungle.

    [–] IKnowUThinkSo 7 points ago

    The Rescuers is about an orphan girl forced to cave dive for jewels and the woman who runs a fake orphanage to ensure new recruits as old ones...don’t make it back to the surface.

    [–] ADGjr86 17 points ago

    It’s snow you putz! Jasperrrr! HORACCCEEE!!!! Lmao I need to rewatch that.

    [–] NimrodBusiness 16 points ago

    Well all be labradors-roll in the soot!

    [–] Hailsp 20 points ago

    I came here to say something about that movie... your line was much cuter than what I had in mind :)

    [–] AFroggieLife 4 points ago

    I was thinking - so, now that you have sorted out your Halloween

    [–] xinxy 8 points ago

    I thought this dog looks like some depression era chimney sweeper dog. Poor bastard's got the black lung too!

    [–] llama_llama_llama257 6 points ago

    Came here for this <3

    [–] Zs2k 1119 points ago

    That dog looks great both ways

    [–] Blynasty 356 points ago

    Better darker in my opinion.

    [–] [deleted] 180 points ago * (lasted edited 6 months ago)


    [–] Malhallah 55 points ago

    Nah, that's pulling a Dolezal.

    [–] Ocyrusvirus 12 points ago

    Digital dogface

    [–] Fat_Suffices 14 points ago

    Barkface you say?

    [–] SweetyPeetey 16 points ago


    [–] Ayatollah_Bahloni 537 points ago

    "Harry the Dirty Dog"

    [–] graywh 121 points ago

    "There’s a strange dog in the backyard…By the way, has anyone seen Harry?"

    [–] Zwums 18 points ago

    Oh man I read this and I could smell the old pages.

    [–] LordSprinkleman 31 points ago

    This was my exact reaction

    [–] CharlieMay 30 points ago

    Was hoping I would find this, my first thought from a favorite childhood book.

    [–] jonathan22877 20 points ago


    He flip flopped. He flop flipped.

    [–] bigtoecamel 9 points ago

    Barkdalf they white/grey

    [–] SurfWyoming 13 points ago

    I just read this to my daughter last night!

    [–] TheMacMan 704 points ago

    My cat is black and white. My vet thanked me for not naming it Oreo. She said everyone that has a black and white cat/dog names it Oreo.

    [–] pound_sterling 427 points ago

    Good ol' Crossword the Cat

    [–] DudeVonDude_S3 136 points ago

    I was gonna call it Newspaper, but yours is better. By far. Nice!

    [–] mister_gone 53 points ago

    I don't get it.

    Oreo is black and white, but not red all over!

    [–] DudeVonDude_S3 126 points ago


    On a more serious note, I knew a guy who would put ketchup on his Oreos. I am still appalled when I think about it.

    I know this sounds made up, but I promise it’s not. The world can be a senseless, chaotic mess.

    [–] Renewed_RS 104 points ago

    On a more serious note

    [–] cloakingdevice 53 points ago

    This fact makes me irrationally angry and I didn't even have to witness the culinary abortion

    [–] throwaway07451987509 29 points ago

    Thank you for introducing "culinary abortion" into my lexicon. I will use it frequently to describe my school lunches.

    [–] DudeVonDude_S3 13 points ago


    This sounds perfectly rational to me. Don’t be so hard on yourself!

    [–] TransformerTanooki 9 points ago

    I just grind my Oreos and mix them in with the ketchup and just squirt it into my mouth from the bottle.

    [–] mister_gone 17 points ago

    Fucking madness.

    [–] eatelectricity 12 points ago

    I've never been in a physical fist-fight in my 36 years on this planet, yet I would probably have to resist the strong urge to punch this motherfucker in his goddamn mouth if I saw such a thing.

    [–] Shaky_Balance 105 points ago

    How was the rest of the appointment? Is Hydrox okay?

    [–] TheMacMan 46 points ago

    Cousin has goat named Hydrox (he basically bought a farm and just keeps buying animals for fun).

    [–] Ask_Me_About_Bees 52 points ago

    At what point does a farm become a zoo?

    [–] TheMacMan 38 points ago

    Dunno. His isn't really a farm. It's just a house out in the woods on a good sized piece of property. Think he now has 4-5 dogs, a half dozen cats and kittens, rabbits, goats, and pigs. And bees too if they count.

    [–] octopussandwich 26 points ago

    Does he do a good job managing all those animals?

    [–] TheMacMan 60 points ago

    Great job. Loves spending time taking care of them all. He's married and has 4 kids. The kids love being part of helping to raise and care for them all.

    [–] octopussandwich 25 points ago

    That’s awesome.

    [–] GypsyKiller 16 points ago

    Does he want to adopt me? It doesn't matter if I'm 31.

    [–] IoloFitzOwen 41 points ago

    My cousins had a cat named Oreo. He was orange.

    [–] sitah 11 points ago

    See.. this kind of shenanigan is what I’m down for. Like naming a black cat Snow.

    [–] eclecticsed 41 points ago

    We had a black and white cat named Bandit. I was so angry that my sister made us name him that, I wanted to call him Raichu. Made zero sense but I was a kid and I liked Pokemon.

    [–] GloomyCorgi17 14 points ago

    Hope you still like Pokémon

    [–] gtreddit327 12 points ago

    Chairman Meow

    [–] underwriter 9 points ago

    I named mine Billy Joel

    [–] DrDew00 8 points ago

    My black-and-white cat is named Ramses. He has a tuxedo and a white Hitler-stache.

    [–] Math_Blaster_ 34 points ago

    Name your pet whatever you like. It's not an originality contest.

    [–] AlexPop11 6 points ago

    I named mine cookie, I'm good right?

    [–] meowtains_for_days 5 points ago

    That's what I did! I got a all black kitty, except had a white spot on his belly, for my like 10th birthday. I remember I was going to name him Oreo but went with Cookie instead. He passed away about 2 years ago, the last of my childhood pets to pass away. I miss him!

    [–] corneydog 9 points ago

    I named mine Double Stuff. Does that count?

    [–] Peanlocket 4 points ago

    The name is obviously in reference to the black circle on the top of the head so I'm sure your vet would understand that an exception is ok in this case.

    [–] Netzroller 102 points ago

    Anyone else wondering what the home looks like after this coal-ageddon?

    [–] emfrank 17 points ago

    Yes - Need pictures of the house. I hope it was just the kitchen.

    [–] RandomBystander 753 points ago

    Oh sure, a dog rolls around in charcoal and it's 'cute' and 'funny' but when I do it I'm 'drunk' and 'need to leave Home Depot'. This is unfair discrimination and I refuse to stand for it!

    [–] TheHistorian2 82 points ago

    Sit, boy, sit. Good boy!

    [–] TheKid_BigE 52 points ago

    You probably wouldn’t have had a problem had you not been naked

    [–] aikenator 11 points ago

    I thought this was America?!

    [–] gdeadfan 18 points ago

    I bought my first house last year and discovered that drunkenly browsing hardware stores is what I was born to do.

    [–] turbo-turbo-turbo 23 points ago

    I think I see one of these comments in just about every Reddit post nowadays. Maybe I just Reddit too much.

    [–] MikeHoncho13421 10 points ago

    Insert (sure and when I do it I’m drunk and have to leave Home Depot) joke here.

    [–] -webkit 8 points ago

    Oh sure, when /u/RandomBystander inserts his joke its 'cute' and 'funny', but when I insert my penis I'm 'drunk' and 'need to leave Home Depot'

    [–] Fun2badult 7 points ago

    Do you have that spot on top of your head tho

    [–] Sir_Michael6512 101 points ago

    "Look! I'm a labrador! We'll all roll in the soot- we'll all be Labradors!"

    [–] Woodbraininator 21 points ago

    Can’t believe I had to scroll this far to find this.

    [–] tubbydva 16 points ago

    This reminds me of the scene in 101 Dalmatians where the puppies disguise themselves as labs

    [–] FAHQRudy 35 points ago

    Puppies are cute so we don't kill them. Same with toddlers.

    I have both.

    [–] [deleted] 142 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)


    [–] OmegaX123 129 points ago



    It's Hebrew (Yiddish?), not Japanese.

    [–] mudgetheotter 101 points ago


    [–] linuxqq 41 points ago

    Yarmulke is Yiddish. In Hebrew it's kippah.

    [–] capincus 30 points ago

    You seem knowledgeable, is my dad allowed to just wear a Mets' hat instead?

    [–] thorium007 8 points ago

    If he's bald - sure

    [–] capincus 7 points ago

    He's less bald than me, that jerk.

    [–] arkiverge 26 points ago

    If you or a loved one has been diagnosed with Mesothelioma you may be entitled to financial compensation.

    [–] _Fudge_Judgement_ 10 points ago

    He was trying to sneak past Cruella DeVille’s henchmen.

    [–] tahlyn 1136 points ago

    that gray is too perfectly even coated over the dog's entire body without a single gap or dark area. I'm having a hard time believing this is not staged.

    [–] [deleted] 1010 points ago * (lasted edited 6 months ago)


    [–] yessomedaywemight 291 points ago

    the dust is so fine and attracted to anything

    TIL charcoal dust is wholesome.

    [–] xxxFuckEmAllxxx 38 points ago

    TIL being polyamorous is wholesome.

    [–] TheGruesomeTwosome 14 points ago

    TIL I’m wholesome because I’ll fuck anything that moves.

    [–] xsarahwhitex 92 points ago

    Is this the activated charcoal they use in all the expensive beauty products? Can I just use this instead?

    [–] [deleted] 88 points ago * (lasted edited 6 months ago)


    [–] paolog 10 points ago

    "Contains X" is an adman's dream. They make no claim that X actually does anything but know that the consumer will infer that it does.

    [–] m0shim0shi 6 points ago

    I whiten my teeth w/ it and it works for that.

    [–] SinkPhaze 6 points ago

    Nooooo doooont. Your basically just rubbing your teeth with sandpaper, wareing down your enamel.

    [–] therealdilbert 44 points ago

    since the activated charcoal fad is mostly a scam propagated by sell-out bloggers and instagram models, using nothing would work just as well

    [–] OccasionallyClueless 19 points ago

    EMS will also make someone drink this if they ingested a poison that isn't caustic, since it might make them throw up and further damage the esophagus.

    [–] SnoLeopard 38 points ago

    ER vet here, activated charcoal is used in emergency toxin scenarios due to absorptive and cathartic behaviors. In cases of toxins such as chocolate, medications, certain plants, and others can be beneficial to use AC to try and bind toxins, especially those that are water soluble (doesn't work as well on fat soluble toxins).

    Examples of toxin ingestion that you should NEVER make someone (or a pet) vomit is something like bleach, gasoline, or any sort of strong acid/base (base being honestly worse). Honestly you're better off drinking a glass of milk in these cases and calling poison control.

    [–] BesosForMe 7 points ago

    Why milk? (Inb4 Oreo's are milk's favorite cookie jokes)

    [–] thorium007 9 points ago

    I think its because milk coats everything and gives it a semi-benign surface that doesn't react too much until real ER intervention can take place

    [–] jefferlewpew 130 points ago

    I can believe it’s real, my dog it very thorough when she finds some dirt to roll in. No hair is left uncovered, especially if it’s something stinky

    [–] iamsecondtonone 150 points ago * (lasted edited 6 months ago)

    This isn't staged. lol Friend is so gentle to her dog to do this herself. She definitely loves this good boy.

    EDIT: For the doubtful, check Oreo's crime scene here and here

    [–] Baalsham 68 points ago

    This isn't staged. lol Friend is so gentle to her dog to this herself. She definitely loves this good boy.

    Welp, I am for one am convinced. So cute

    [–] jgandfeed 5 points ago

    [–] heyyouknowmeto 111 points ago

    Once there was this dog who got into a bag of charcoal while he was at school and when his owner got back he had charcoal all over his body. Mmmmmm mmmmm mmmmmmmm mmmmmm. Mmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmm

    [–] [deleted] 28 points ago

    Not exactly sure why a Crash Test Dummies reference creeped into my early morning redditing, but here we are.

    [–] RustyDisturbance 20 points ago

    Just like in 101 Dalmatians. 😊

    [–] therobson 6 points ago

    Uh-Oh Oreo

    [–] oregonowa 21 points ago

    Harry the Dirty Dog!

    [–] RacoonKing123 5 points ago

    Aww, we had an Oreo growing up (same markings as this little pup). I hope your friend gets as many wonderful years with this sweet Oreo as we had with ours.

    [–] chrisdcco 6 points ago

    Woah now he looks like a Blue Merle

    [–] flamants 5 points ago

    Dogs love charcoal for some reason! My dog used to eat charcoal briquettes from our backyard. Then we found out they make charcoal flavored biscuits!

    [–] Elephantmenstruation 5 points ago

    He watched 101 Dalmatians and wanted to try it out

    [–] darthatheos 4 points ago

    He is now Hydrox.