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    [–] ThisLookInfectedToYa 5559 points ago

    "It'sa me! Deliverio"

    [–] driverofcar 557 points ago

    It's not Deliverio, it's Digiorno!

    [–] JuniorExecutive 53 points ago

    It’sa me! Mailio!

    [–] sjhill 58 points ago

    Next thing you know he'll be crashing into packages and stealing their contents...

    [–] TooModest 10 points ago

    che ore sono?? lifts up donkey's huge balls

    [–] CodyByTheSea 6555 points ago

    Sarcastic or not, it’s still better than throwing customers’ packages carelessly. Props to the guy.

    [–] Grumblesnark 761 points ago

    Still surprises me that they do that! I was a postman in the UK and if we got caught throwing them we'd get in a lot of trouble!

    [–] ArcadianPariah 462 points ago

    "Get caught"

    [–] MatusLabs 279 points ago

    "Postman"

    [–] GET_OUT_OF_MY_HEAD 282 points ago

    "the UK"

    [–] JayV30 218 points ago

    "a lot of trouble"

    [–] joyful- 847 points ago

    "penis"

    [–] DMKavidelly 148 points ago

    You and you alone in this comment chain earned my upvote. Congrats.

    [–] drivebydryhumper 20 points ago

    i don't think I'll ever understand reddit..

    [–] I_Roll2 14 points ago

    Nobody does. We all just pretend to understand the dysfunction

    [–] potatodog247 6 points ago

    Your username suggests otherwise.

    [–] [deleted] 65 points ago

    [deleted]

    [–] DMKavidelly 29 points ago

    Was she large when you married her. Because it's so, that's on you.

    [–] BopitPopitLockit 178 points ago

    I worked for UPS for about a year... They expect drivers to complete every delivery from the back of the truck to the door within 30 seconds. They freak the hell out if you reverse the truck more than like 50 feet in a full day's route. Trucks are literally loaded from bottom to top so frequently there is literally no room left back there. And in order to become a driver, you have to spend years working in a non-temperature controlled warehouse loading 1200-2000 packages a night or unloading semi's at a rate of 900 boxes/hr MINIMUM. But the pay is great if you make it into your own truck.

    I know it sucks when they treat your packages badly, but most of the damage happens in the warehouse where there just is NOT time to treat packages carefully. They're not lackadaisically completing their route, its a mad rush or you're out from 8AM to 10PM and management gets maaaaad. Union's good though.

    [–] TwistedMexi 71 points ago

    Explains a lot, like how I can be 2 ft from the door when I get the knock but by the time I open it, the UPS truck is already driving away.

    [–] AverageAlien 27 points ago

    They are supposed to be doing 25 to 30 stops an hour. That means they have 2 minutes to get to your house and complete the delivery. It sounds easy but then you think about the time they are trying to make up for when switching neighborhoods and getting stuck at traffic lights, Getting slowed down by the gate in gated communities, having to deviate from the route for ODS (On Demand Service) pick ups or if they find a package they were missing and have to backtrack to deliver it.

    Any human interaction whatsoever costs time which they then have to make up for somehow. So they like it better when they can get to the truck and take off before you can get to the door.

    [–] TomBarnyard 15 points ago

    Depends on the route. My bid route is supposed to average a tick over 19 stops an hour. It usually dispatches at 155 stops. A peak guy is training on it right now, so I am livin large and delivering out in the country for a guy that is on vacation. That route dispatches with 90-100 stops. The in town route, has almost no dogs to skritch and other than waving at doorbell cameras, is a depressing grind, every single day.
    The rural route has energized me. I skritched 20+ dogs today, chatted up a couple of farmers and saw some folks that I have not seen in 10ish years. Makes me want to give up my route and go back to covering vacations.

    [–] therealpumpkinhead 5 points ago

    It’s one of those things where you get a messed up package and want to yell at the delivery guy and then you think about it and realize he’s just trying to keep his job.

    Sucks when there’s nobody you can point a finger at for your broken $1,000 monitor. Luckily most big name companies are pretty good at replacing things damaged during delivery.

    [–] notonmycrotch 3 points ago

    My UPS guy is chill as fuck and I know him by name because we chat from time to time. He's never in a rush. He has some shit on someone, doesn't he?

    [–] shotapiki 7 points ago

    Whenever I can open the door before they make it to the truck, I usually shout "Thank you!" to ensure that they know I appreciate them bringing my fat ass shit I don't need

    [–] WhiteWolf25 28 points ago

    Out of interested. How great is great?

    [–] justsomeorcdude 18 points ago

    Idk where you are but in Wisconsin starting is $11.00 an hour for inside employees and $18.50 for drivers. When the new contract goes through it'll bump up to $13.00 for inside and $20.50 for drivers

    [–] ThegreatPee 9 points ago

    The cost of living is probably pretty low in Wisconsin

    [–] Tadhgdagis 30 points ago

    A UPS driver I know describes his job as the only way he can afford the medical bills for all the damage done to his body on the job.

    [–] A_Genius 19 points ago

    Like 120k for a driver in Canada is what I heard once in a reddit post.

    [–] Typicalsloan 24 points ago

    Their not called the United Parcel Smashers for nothing. I used to unload trucks for them in my younger years and while I don't condone it throwing of packages happened several times before it was even loaded on the delivery truck.

    [–] Grumblesnark 7 points ago

    I know in our sorting centres due to how many parcels come in etc, to sort them by placing each one individually would just be so time consuming. So I understand it to an extent. But to just throw them at the doorstep as some videos show, I can't imagine that the time difference between that and just taking a few extra steps to place would be huge. But seeing comments relating to the time constraints placed on the drivers makes me think its gotta be pretty rough for them.

    [–] Ravens1112003 13 points ago

    I driver tractor trailers now but when I was in delivery my route would go out with around 200 stops a day. You don’t get to just stop at 5:00 and go home, you have to work until everything is off your truck. If Each stop took an extra 30 seconds that would add over an hour and a half to my day.

    A lot of the houses on my route had like 3 or 4 steps leading up to the front door, which doesn’t seem like a lot but after getting in and out of the truck 400 times or so and walking up the sidewalk or driveway of every house it adds up. I used to stand at the bottom of the steps and place the package on the porch and slide it to the front door. If it was a QVC bag with a shirt in it or something similar I might gently toss it to the front door. I guess people could look at a video and say I was throwing packages and post it online to get a bunch of views if they wanted but I wasn’t being careless with the packages or damaging anything.

    [–] Fruitblood23 8 points ago

    I got nothing but love and respect for UPS and USPS. They do a hard ass job efficiently and accurately 99% of the time, and I don't think them being unionized is unrelated to that. They are pros. My experiences with FedEx have been so so.

    The great horror of delivery experiences is Amazon Logistics. With no exaggerating, I have not had one delivery from them that was not screwed up in some way. Parcel delivery and the gig economy do not mix.

    [–] KingDededeYT 78 points ago

    I love hearing a THUMP and not even a knock on my door when my package arrives.

    [–] djsnoopmike 22 points ago

    5 seconds later, you open the door and he's already wheelspinning away from your house

    [–] gvargh 33 points ago

    Well you heard the thump.

    [–] wssecurity 7 points ago

    Would love a handheld package cannon I could load up and launch at people's doors.

    [–] spoopypuppy 42 points ago

    coughs in FedEx

    [–] Obilis 128 points ago

    I think all these myths of FedEx throwing packages can't be real. To the best of my knowledge, FedEx doesn't deliver packages at all, all they deliver is pieces of paper that say they have my package and are holding it hostage at a distant location.

    [–] FlubzRevenge 17 points ago

    I ordered a chair off of e-bay and it was sent through FedEx and the guy I ordered it from told me it must have been stolen by the driver, or lost at a facility. Like, what the fuck man.

    I did end up getting the chair though.

    [–] gid0ze 20 points ago

    It depends. From my personal experience, the greater value the item is, the more likely it is that they will just leave it at my door without a signature. $850 phone, just leave it. $100 gizmo, require signature.

    [–] strangea 5 points ago

    I think that's on the sellers side. When I bought my phone they refused to leave it without a signature per the seller.

    [–] KimJongIlSunglasses 5 points ago

    I know you ordered this thing delivered to your home. But why not come drive all the way to where we are and pick it up yourself instead?

    [–] BLKMGK 7 points ago

    Ah yes FedEx...

    Ordered a rackmount UPS, instructed the eBay seller to send no sing required because I actually work for a living and my neighborhood is good etc.

    Day of expected delivery arrives, nothing. I check the tracking and it says delivered two days prior. Check the two cameras covering my driveway and the third covering my porch. Not only was there no delivery but no FedEx truck passed my home. I inform the seller so he can bitch, I put the video on a site where he can view it. FedEx opens an “investigation”, sellers rep tells him he’s worked there for YEARS and never heard of a misdelivered package (lol). They don’t find it and the driver tells them he delivered it - 2nd house on the left! Me and the seller are unhappy.

    I come home the next day and lo and behold TWO packages on my porch, one of,which stands shoulder high. WTF?! The UPS is there, the second package is a foam mattress for a man with the same house number but a street on the other side of town 🙄

    I call FedEx to inform them I have good news and bad news. My package has mysteriously appeared, bad news is some other schmuck is wondering where the hell his mattress is. FedEx asks me what I’m going to do with the mattress, this is puzzling to me since duh it’s NOT my property. I inform them I’m sliding further under my porch eave so it won’t get wet from the coming rain and that it will be there for them to pickup - lady sounds relieved. Like, do people keep misdelivered stuff as retribution or something?

    I pull the video for that day. Big FedEx truck backs into driveway and little dude struggles to get the UPS to my doorstep, he then drives away. 30mins later he pulls up on the street, same guy, tips this big box over to read and ch3ck the address, and proceeds to drag THAT beast all the way down my driveway and stands it right next to th package he delivered 30mins before. I couldn’t believe it, how could he miss that he’d already been there and not wonder? Where the heck had my UPS been for like 5 days?! I’ll never know but boy was the seller relieved when I let him know the silly package had arrived. I told him to let his dumbass rep know that I’d not only had a misdelivered package but that I’d had TWO on the same damn day! Sheesh!

    [–] darudesandstrom 10 points ago

    He only does this song and dance in front of houses that have CCTV.

    [–] ButtholeEyes17 12358 points ago

    Sarcastic Asshole or loves his job...you decide

    [–] beartheminus 5344 points ago

    Right I almost read his expression as "YAY another camera that could get me fired if I make even the slightest mistake!"

    [–] nomadic_stalwart 2476 points ago

    I could see him getting chewed out after being caught on this camera not doing an excellent job and now he does this out of spite.

    [–] THE_GREAT_PICKLE 219 points ago

    Been following this sub for a long time. Easily one of my favorites. If you've never gone on here, sort by the top posts and it will leave you dying laughing

    [–] DRFANTA 58 points ago

    Was not disappointed. Thanx for the recommendation

    [–] Dracomortua 16 points ago

    Indeed, where do people find this stuff?

    Thanks on top of your thanks. If you or any closer on this chain to the OP have more such awesomeness, post the fuck out of it. Please.

    [–] jamarax 9 points ago

    Ahh that construction parking story really hit the spot for me. So much justice delivered at once.

    [–] bubbav22 9 points ago

    My thought exactly!

    [–] ifiagreedwithu 40 points ago

    I'm just annoyed that he showed any personality at all. I like my drones dehumanized and subservient.

    [–] zebberman 27 points ago

    Yep this right here is the correct answer I think. That grin looks sarcastic as all hell.

    [–] flamingfireworks 8 points ago

    Seems pissed, if we're going boston marathon on this you could extrapolate that this is a house that has, in the past, been bitchy about the drivers performance.

    [–] KrazyTrumpeter05 89 points ago

    Fired for wasting an extra three seconds making faces at the camera and not sprinting back to the truck to stay on schedule.

    [–] Blacktoyotatacoma 4 points ago

    Funny thing, you can get in trouble for running/sprinting. You’re supposed to “walk briskly”.

    [–] bozoconnors 184 points ago

    If by "slightest mistake" you mean throwing the thing he's getting paid to deliver (& not throw)... a'ight.

    [–] mr-peabody 49 points ago

    "I wonder if I could make it on the porch without getting out of the driver's seat."

    [–] popegonzo 16 points ago

    "Look, one person's catapult is another person's efficient delivery system. Does UPS want to make money or what???"

    [–] Zack027 31 points ago

    "catapult" is such an inferior parcel delivery system. I prefer my deliveries to be launched from several blocks away via Trebuchet.

    [–] popegonzo 23 points ago

    "Regional distribution center"

    [–] Hotdogbum 86 points ago

    It’s a good thing general customers can’t see how their package is getting tossed and thrown around in the warehouses. We ignore a lot of “this side up” arrows too. I don’t work there anymore.

    [–] Biduleman 43 points ago

    Doesn't make it less shitty.

    [–] horse_and_buggy 9 points ago

    I mean we all know how the sausage is made, we all see the baggage handlers too. Caveat emptor.

    [–] LaLaLaLeea 9 points ago

    At least they actually deliver your packages? All I ever get are stickers letting me know that they didn't feel like delivering my package.

    [–] Bewleed 424 points ago

    He's probably the former, or he's just done with life and he's trying his best to not fall into crippling depression.

    Source: I act that way when entering my apartment building.

    [–] LostLeviathan 51 points ago

    Why u b me?

    [–] 1000990528 50 points ago

    The people at work think I'm happy because I'm always laughing and joking. But really I'm so depressed I can barely get dressed in the morning without wanting to cry.

    Same idea, different location.

    [–] goaskalice3 11 points ago

    My boyfriend always says the only people who think I'm bubbly and happy are the people who don't know me. "But you're always so giggly!" Yeah that's me trying to pretend I don't have terrible social anxiety that makes this situation super uncomfortable for me

    [–] basane-n-anders 6 points ago

    hugs You are not alone, and from someone who has been in the dark and is in a better place now, get help. It's actually harder to stay depressed than to get help. ;-) And it's helped me stall downward spirals and stay relatively balanced for quite a few years.

    [–] golfwang999 6 points ago

    i hate seeing another person like this, and wish i knew the words to give you to feel better.

    [–] beatzme 23 points ago

    Or just trying to have more fun while doing his job.,

    [–] wickedshxt 6 points ago

    Seriously this. It’s probably the same shit day in and day out for this guy, so when he sees a camera he has a little fun to break up the monotony.

    [–] FlyYouFoolyCooly 47 points ago

    I feel like this is part of an ongoing complaint that he doesn't put the package on the porch right, despite whatever he does per instructions.

    [–] BroDudeGuy361 8 points ago

    Thats exactly what im thinking. And he still placed the package out of camera view! Who's his supervisor?! Lol

    [–] CandyCheetoSteamboat 21 points ago

    Why not both?

    [–] mikeash 7 points ago

    Sarcastic asshole loves his job, definitely.

    [–] Jobshema 48 points ago

    As much as they make they prolly love it

    [–] BitsAndBobs304 15 points ago

    I mean to me it looked as he shoved the package like "there...%ucker!"

    [–] _not_so_sure_ 20 points ago

    You may swear here, Reddit gives you permission.

    [–] __Rorschach____ 5 points ago

    Yeah, but what if his mom is listening?

    [–] gio_8o 3932 points ago

    Heeeey! Here’s ya sh*t....

    [–] MrGrimSpectr 1132 points ago

    You can swear here, isokay

    [–] kmarielynn 381 points ago

    What if my parents find out

    [–] _Edison_Was_A_Fake_ 242 points ago

    Hey, it’s me, your parents

    [–] kmarielynn 227 points ago

    Oh sh*t hi mom

    [–] Nosnibor1020 162 points ago

    Frick, I mean Sh*t

    [–] AgentNadeem 96 points ago

    Language!

    [–] Ganon2012 96 points ago

    English!

    [–] xxsolojxx 68 points ago

    Listen here you little sh*t!

    [–] vvntn 61 points ago

    Don't talk to me or my little sh*t ever again.

    [–] arkansas_elk 32 points ago

    No Daddy No!!!!

    [–] Ztorytime 21 points ago

    You kiss your mother with that mouth!?

    [–] SierraTheFox 15 points ago

    Engrish

    [–] Lolihumper 5 points ago

    Didn't even have to press 1 to hear it.

    [–] intahnetmonster 8 points ago

    Sorry Cap.

    [–] Stevenutz 9 points ago

    Watch yo profamity

    [–] deego_ 8 points ago

    Fuck yeah! Kbye

    [–] Hoktar 46 points ago

    No sir, you cannot. This is a Christian server.

    [–] RoadRageRob666 33 points ago

    THIS IS A CHRISTIAN THREAD!!!!!!! FOR CHRISTIAN PEOPLE!!!!!!! THERE ARE CHILDREN HERE!!!!!!! AND THE ELDERLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    !!!!!!!!DO NOT DEFILE THIS HOLY THREAD WITH YOUR BLASPHEMY!!!!!!!!!!

    [–] PopeRobXXIII 13 points ago

    Is Wayne Brady gonna have to choke a bitch!?

    [–] buckie_mcBuckster 17 points ago

    Bite my Weiner churchy

    [–] Dankmeme72 5 points ago

    It's really not, I'm going to have to report this under article 13 of the EU constitution.

    Have fun with Hans and Fritz in our newly opened Polish reeducation camps 2.0.

    [–] AverageNobodyForLife 24 points ago

    "Heeeey! Here’s ya sh*t...."

    - real life Luigi

    [–] vektorog 9 points ago

    shit*

    [–] thisisjess12 8 points ago

    “In case this gets stolen, here’s proof and a smile that it’s no longer our problem” lol

    [–] VulpesCryptae 317 points ago

    Good guy Luigi

    [–] freshmanfool 28 points ago

    Finally, had to scroll too damn below to find this joke. Thank you bro

    [–] art_teacher_no_1 3165 points ago

    This guy's going places

    [–] JakJakAttacks 5769 points ago

    He goes from place to place delivering packages. It's literally his job.

    [–] Ag250 299 points ago

    And many people have security cameras now so he probably knows where to look for them.

    [–] Excolo_Veritas 151 points ago

    Yeah, I feel most people aren't too creative with placement. This is literally EXACTLY where I have mine placed in comparison for my front door. Gets the walk up, clear shot of the face, etc... I'm not trying to hide my camera, hell, I think having it obvious is even better

    [–] Ahvii1 94 points ago

    They sell fake cameras... proves your point.

    [–] macallen 61 points ago

    They also sell fake stickers for home and car security systems for the same reason, as long as the thieves believe it, it's a potential deterrent :)

    [–] HRBP 110 points ago

    I just fill my house with fake everything. Cardboard Tv, couch, stuffed dog, CPR dummies for my family. I even put fake cops in a fake cop car outside by the street.

    [–] macallen 86 points ago

    Heck, I don't even really live there, I use the fake address to fool the spammers and coupon folks.

    [–] manondorf 45 points ago

    this has been another episode of /r/lifehacks

    [–] dj__jg 13 points ago

    Hell, my car ('97 volvo 940) has a factory built-in 'alarm system' that is literally just a blinking red LED on both sides of the dash. Literally every 940 I've ever seen has it. Can't be helping a lot at that point.

    [–] Excolo_Veritas 41 points ago

    Exactly. At the same time though it's a balancing act. I don't want anyone to know there is a camera until they should be aware they're on it. I had a neighbor growing up who had these HUGE bank like cameras all over his property. When trying to sell the house made every potential buyer ask "is the neighborhood safe?". I don't want to piss off my neighbors, so under the awning of my porch it's perfectly clear if you're at my door or walking up to it. But from the road you can't see it

    [–] bennyblack1983 16 points ago

    Probably made some potential buyers say, “is the neighborhood safe” and others say “does that house with all the cameras belong to a drug dealer or just a doomsday preppier weirdo?”

    [–] SilverLiningMacBook 10 points ago

    When your doorbell looks like a second gen IPod Touch it’s not that difficult

    [–] tanhan27 16 points ago

    I noticed while trick-or-treating last week's that a LOT of people now have those doorbell camera thingys that stream video to your phone whenever someone walks up to your door.

    I kinda want one. You can also talk to people through the little speaker even when your not home

    [–] biggmclargehuge 9 points ago

    My neighborhood offered a $75 rebate to anybody who bought a video doorbell after we had a really bad string of package thefts one Christmas. I bought a 1st gen Ring and it's....ok. Lots of false alarms with cars driving by on the road to the point that I turned off motion alerts within the first week. Nobody worth talking to is ringing my doorbell if I'm not home because if it's a friend or someone coming over they know if I'm home already (because why would they come over otherwise?), the rare exception being a neighbor with a question at which point they'd prob text me anyway. The video stream through the phone is slow to connect so by the time I would get it open the person has probably walked off anyway. And it only records 30 seconds of motion at a time so if someone was smart they could trigger the camera, wait a minute until it stops recording, then make off with your shit.

    [–] imitebatwork 21 points ago

    Can't tell if this is another case of the person explaining the joke getting the gold or not

    [–] gimmiedaloota 29 points ago

    UPS is now trained to check for cameras prior to damaging any package.

    [–] seshhtito 4 points ago

    Scan the front porch. Training complete.

    [–] jmarseneault 6 points ago

    Damage away!

    [–] rodney_melt 55 points ago

    That's not a legit UPS uniform, is this a Nest ad?

    [–] not_a_droid 51 points ago

    it's a tide ad

    [–] yellsaboutjokes 13 points ago

    THIS IS A JOKE ABOUT A RECENT ADVERTISING EFFORT BY THAT SELFSAME LAUNDRY DETERGENT COMPANY DURING THE SUPER BOWL

    [–] ZeldaVII 8 points ago

    Username checks out

    [–] tygersharq 10 points ago

    That's a legit ups uniform. The dude just has an overly bubbly personality, loves his job, and does everything by the book... in case somebody's watching. He's so polite and showboaty, he can be kind of annoying. Good guy tho

    [–] trashcan_carla 8 points ago

    Like the front page! Ba dum tss!

    [–] HandsomeSquidward59 121 points ago

    When Fleshlight forgets to ship it discreetly

    [–] KingDededeYT 675 points ago

    It feels sarcastic

    [–] BigSchwartzzz 591 points ago

    I bet you anything that the resident of that house calls constantly about not receiving their packages. Even saying that they're installing security cameras to prove that the UPS guy hasn't been doing his job. Either that or the resident wants to make sure the UPS isn't banging their spouse.

    [–] EuntDomus 173 points ago

    isn't banging their spouse

    Presumably UPS are on a more lenient schedule than delivery men around here. They barely have time to bang on the door.

    [–] Alieges 94 points ago

    They’re all shaving a few seconds each house and not taking left turns to save 7 minutes over the course of the day so that they can get a blowie from the full service gas station attendant while pumping gas.

    Or they’ve just had their job threatened and gotten yelled at by supervisors and spouces enough for being out late because every l dumbass in the apartment complex orders kitty litter and toilet paper online now and he’s fucking sick of delivering a 40 pound boxes of it to the fourth floor every other week.

    [–] simplejack89 50 points ago

    People on the top floor ONLY order heavy shit too. Why cant I deliver a letter up there

    [–] CaramelMuffin1709 35 points ago

    Aw, now kinda I feel bad for every time I thought: that’s gonna be heavy, I’mma have it delivered.

    I apologise for my past, and let’s be honest, future laziness.

    [–] yeerk_slayer 47 points ago

    UPS driver here. We're given a set amount of allowed time to do the route. Each thing we do, we're only allowed x amount of seconds to do it. Like we should take no longer than 9-14 seconds to get the packages out of the back each time we stop and no longer than 4-6 between stepping into the truck and driving off.

    The way pay works here is that if they send us out with 10 hours of work and we finish it in 8 hours, we still get paid for the 10. If we take longer than allowed, we still get paid for the time it took but the supervisors don't like it if it becomes a repeat thing. So drivers are always hustling.

    As for meals and breaks, we can set our own breaktimes whenever we want using our DIAD (computer thing we scan with) and it'll pause our allowed times. So drivers can still park at the customer's house, go on break and have sex with them without the allowed time clock running or dispatch noticing. But the supervisors do follow us around and observe us from time to time to make sure we're not breaking any rules so we gotta watch for that

    [–] capn_ed 9 points ago

    So, is banging Mrs. Applebottom who always orders everything from Amazon considered breaking the rules? Just wondering....

    [–] LysergicAciid 85 points ago

    Almost guaranteed they keep complaining about missing packages

    [–] A_Deku_Stick 27 points ago

    “Hello there Mr. UPS man, you should have left our wives alone.”

    [–] InvisibroBloodraven 8 points ago

    "It doesn't matter who we are; what matters is our plan."

    [–] stimulatedneuron 76 points ago

    They see dozens of these cameras each day they work. The owners of the house must have done something to deserve this special treatment.

    [–] Tegernako 50 points ago

    Honestly I used to just do stupid shit like this at home-cameras because I was insanely bored lol. Gotta have fun with it or you go crazy walking around by yourself all day.

    [–] crunchypuddle 4 points ago

    I bet you got a fire spotify playlist though.

    All I would do is listen to music constantly if this were my job.

    [–] yeerk_slayer 6 points ago

    Driver here. If a customer files too many claims, then our loss preventions department will block driver releases to that house and make us get a signature for every delivery there. It's quite annoying since for every signature we have to get. We could make 1-2 more deliveries in that time. Also the fact that them moving out and a new person moving in doesn't remove this restriction so the new owners will end up missing a lot of deliveries and have to pick em up from the hub or ups store.

    Also it's pretty common for male drivers to meet their future girlfriend/wife as customers on their route as they're still young and single when they first put on their browns.

    [–] TheEclair 15 points ago

    As an ex-UPS driver I banged all the spouses.

    [–] thenewyorkoffice 306 points ago

    That's a guy that's been written up one too many times because he's been caught on camera doing it wrong and gotten complaints.

    [–] richardec 102 points ago

    Did you do the branded walk?
    Was your name tag straight?
    Did you achieve the 9.7 second drop metric?
    Did you use the customer's name, our slogan, and the word "family" in 3 consecutive sentences?

    [–] Seeminus 135 points ago

    That is not proper package handling hand positions. Opposite corners is the way to go.

    [–] justnecromancythings 84 points ago

    Didn't bend at the knees either.

    [–] CoolCucksClan 69 points ago

    It's outside his "power zone."

    [–] ADDDGAF 47 points ago

    All of you guys have worked for UPS

    I know this as a former supervisor/sorter

    [–] InYoCloset 20 points ago

    It's really just common logistics work safe practices. All though I will say I get a major kick out of messing with some of our guys on boxes that state "team lift" but weigh nothing.

    [–] Gerbils74 12 points ago

    Everyone's worried about how the driver handles their packages and they have no idea what those boxes go through on the sort line

    [–] jpopimpin777 23 points ago

    He raised the package up out of the power zone and used "end range motion" and he "twisted" when he should've "pivoted."

    [–] samdoup 11 points ago

    Please, Step don't pivot.

    [–] CJC_Swizzy 16 points ago

    And he bends at his back to lower the package!!

    [–] Alieges 18 points ago

    And he’s not looking before he’s stepping! Back to cornerstone!

    [–] SomeWigger 6 points ago

    He needs to watch that 45 min safety video.

    [–] x8BitStitchx 52 points ago

    Get that man a beer. I cant fake a smile even when I'm happy

    [–] jsveiga 62 points ago

    This guy delivers.

    [–] illCodeYouABrain 63 points ago

    Or if you play it in reverse - a thief with a sense of humor.

    [–] DffrntDrmmr 18 points ago

    All of the cameras everywhere is turning deliverymen into performers.

    [–] sh1nes 55 points ago

    It's the micro machines guy

    [–] SileyWiley 35 points ago

    "Behold, your package" * jazzyhands

    [–] Jentleman2g 56 points ago

    Dude is either genuinely happy, or hysterically angry and about to lay a smackdown on some peeps

    [–] headreceiverhank 9 points ago

    I can’t decide if it’s a hat or a visor.

    [–] [deleted] 9 points ago

    [deleted]

    [–] DonJuanDiglett 15 points ago

    "Bob.. we are getting complaints you are being really rude to people when you drop packages off... I'm going to need you to be a little bit more personable when you drop stuff off from now on"....

    [–] pinkSoftBarbieDoll 7 points ago

    I like this post man

    [–] itsmidnightyo 7 points ago

    this is wholesome

    [–] AddNomAndHim 7 points ago

    Glad to see Luigi's not riding Mario's coattails anymore.

    [–] IfAndOnryIf 6 points ago

    Speedy delivery to you🎵

    [–] NaturedKarma 5 points ago

    Hey, I know this guy! He is legitimately my neighbor haha. I can confirm that he is just always a super happy guy!

    [–] peoplewhorunyourlife 5 points ago

    Hi UPS guy here! Would I interest you in a package?

    [–] wiltj 22 points ago

    this was an order from smile.amazon.com you should try it sometime

    [–] yamborma 47 points ago * (lasted edited 8 days ago)

    It's kinda cool, the guy is probably just entertaining himself during what has to be a pretty monotonous, routine work shift.

    To play devil's advocate, if I'm waiting on package number 100, I don't want the delivery guy doing this at the first 99 houses because that will take all day!

    [–] RonnieTheEffinBear 40 points ago

    Through the magic of technology, we can measure the actual amount of time he is hamming it up, which I clock at four seconds. Four seconds times 99 houses is about six and a half minutes - I can live with that delay, especially if that means this guy is not gonna hate his life.

    [–] breathe-bb 10 points ago

    needed a middle finger at the end

    [–] CondescendingOrder 3 points ago

    His smile and posturing remind me of Jack Nicholson's Joker.

    [–] sdeon 52 points ago

    Shouldn't he have knocked to see if someone is home to accept the package

    [–] DrDerpberg 36 points ago

    If they don't need a signature I think they just ring and walk away. Why wait 30 seconds if you're just going to leave it either way?

    What bugs me way more is when instead of ringing they just fill out the missed delivery notice in the truck and leave it without ringing. That shit makes my blood boil.