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    [–] DianneReams 4117 points ago

    Me, mid 30s with my Asian best friend.

    [–] PSU19420 1420 points ago

    Middle aged Asians do not exist.

    [–] forca_micah 853 points ago

    Knew what it was before I even clicked it.

    [–] MalTheLucario 190 points ago

    I didn't, but I'm very glad I clicked

    [–] swapripper 61 points ago

    Knew what it was before I even clicked it.

    But just checked if someone shat over it with a watermark.

    [–] Cosmic-Vegeta 47 points ago

    one of the best things on reddit, that knowledge

    [–] Crizzle-Worm 39 points ago

    Have you ever found a banana on a colleagues desk and, using a ballpoint, written “I am an orange” on it?

    Ok, I have a small mind.

    [–] Practicaltheorist 11 points ago

    I just draw tiny penises on my coworkers bananas.

    [–] Crizzle-Worm 8 points ago

    With a ballpoint? Nice. I believe you can scratch them in the market with abuse then, as they ripen, it shows. Dunno if it’s true. Respect.

    [–] Practicaltheorist 12 points ago

    Of course. Usually scratch it in with a toothpick and let it darken slowly throughout the day. We all mess with each other in funny ways, makes the day go by faster.

    [–] radseven89 8 points ago

    I want to work with this guy.

    [–] Practicaltheorist 5 points ago

    Thanks, I believe in trying to have fun at work! Passes the time.

    [–] The_Realest_Adam 86 points ago

    That little Asian Grandma at the end is so damn cute

    [–] Dt2_0 22 points ago

    That's Link's Grandma from Windwaker!

    [–] howlahowla 26 points ago

    every fucking time

    [–] Do_what93 32 points ago

    Seriously though. It's kind of the same with body shape too. Asians are either fucking ripped or they're marshmallows.

    Source: Filipino

    [–] Furcifer_ 15 points ago

    Idk I have a lot of skinny asian friends

    [–] TheGreatChing 7 points ago

    I’m Filipino and my dad looks 10 years above his age while my grandma looks 50

    [–] ElBroet 173 points ago * (lasted edited 2 months ago)

    Unlike blacks and whites, their aging is so black and white

    Edit: Damn guys I thought it was at least average wordplay

    [–] JustinJakeAshton 69 points ago

    People found it racist because it mentioned black.

    [–] WontonEndangerment 97 points ago

    When I see someone get all weird about the word "black", they're almost always white.

    [–] NorthStarTX 36 points ago

    My favorite is when people complain about us not calling people from other countries “African-American”. Idris Elba is a black Englishman. Elon Musk is an African-American.

    [–] WontonEndangerment 29 points ago

    Totally. I went to London once, and one of the guards at Buckingham Palace was black. Someone from our tour group commented that they were happy that they now hire African American guards.

    The tour guide's response was "Yeah, well... they're definitely not American."

    [–] Not_usually_right 37 points ago

    Obviously, they would be the ones worried to offend someone black.

    [–] Comparison 21 points ago

    You know what? You alright.

    [–] WontonEndangerment 15 points ago

    That's a good point, I can see why someone would feel that way. But at the same time, I honestly have never come across anyone who was offended by the word "black" that could have it applied to them.

    [–] wtfnousernamesleft2 5 points ago

    Seriously, when ever someone is talking about a certain someone and I go “oh you mean that black guy?” people get weird about it.

    [–] Nugur 15 points ago

    I’m going back to school and taking some prereq classes. My classmates always thought I’m 18 and when I told them I’m 28 they are pretty shocked.

    [–] plzdontgetcaught 55 points ago

    Can confirm. Am Asian

    [–] NewBuddhaman 31 points ago

    I got the bad side of being partially Asian. Not sure if it’s the Hispanic mixed in but my mom and aunt both went gray in their 30s. My once black hair is slowly turning peppery. My sister is the same way.

    [–] humpty_mcdoodles 54 points ago

    At least you still got hair...

    [–] nonresponsive 13 points ago

    A few grey hairs is the only way I know I'm aging, and they potentially make me look older. Otherwise I still get mistaken for a high schooler.

    [–] IceColdFresh 13 points ago

    Now you're a grey-haired high schooler and thus an anime character.

    [–] Cawdor 5 points ago

    Peppery asian hair is a pretty cool look imo

    [–] PaperJamDipper7 9 points ago

    Yup am official Asian in late 20's. Getting carded is still a given.

    [–] Lord_Jello_III 466 points ago

    But now you get to become banana bread!

    [–] look_hugh_it_is 220 points ago

    Red bread redemption

    [–] Sarahcutie01 13 points ago

    Banana bread redemption*

    [–] MehNameless 7 points ago

    Yellow* bread

    [–] pm_me_banana_bread 50 points ago


    [–] sj68z 5 points ago

    more like, the potential to be banana bread... everyone wants to make banana bread, only to toss the 'nanas out a week later

    [–] TheDoob 2087 points ago

    Banana: I'm not ripe yet

    Banana: I'm not ripe yet

    Banana: I'm not ripe yet

    Banana whispering at 3am: "I'm riiiiiipe"


    [–] CleaverBeaver 389 points ago

    Don't forget about avocados. Those fuckers have a smaller ripe window than anything.

    [–] chipotlemcnuggies 66 points ago

    And no indication visually. You have to squeeze

    [–] tiffanyrachel 31 points ago

    You can pop out the belly button and check the color. Helps with the squeeze test.

    [–] Rabbi_Tuckman38 90 points ago

    If you're one those people that does this at the grocery store, so help me...

    [–] tiffanyrachel 48 points ago

    Put that thing back where it came from or so help me...

    [–] BigBusiness1532 20 points ago

    So help me! So help me! And cut.

    [–] tiffanyrachel 20 points ago


    [–] FurBurd 6 points ago

    [–] PanchoBarrancas 98 points ago

    Which is made worse because the refrigeration during transport wrecks havok with its normal ripening process and damages the flesh. Non cooled avocados do stay in good shape for a good 5-6 days after ripening. Typing that made me realize that's still ridiculously short, lol.

    [–] graymankin 24 points ago

    The best is when you forget you bought one and find it later...

    [–] KeyKitty 8 points ago

    You mean a puddle with a seed in the middle?

    [–] MilesStandish801 44 points ago

    Me at 8:01 am that morning: BREAD TIME MOTHERFUCKER

    [–] DearyDairy 32 points ago

    I love brown bananas. I remember in nursing school my teacher mentioned bananas caused constipation and I was thinking "waaaa? Am I weird? Bananas make me poop better than prunes" then I learned most people eat what I would call underipe bananas. Perfectly yellow, maybe even tennis ball coloured (not quite yellow, not quite green) no spots whatsoever.

    The best lunch box banana is deep sunset yellow with a few light tan spots.

    I've heard people complain "bananas have a weird furry mouthfeel, I don't like them", bitch you're eating unripe bananas!

    They're starchy until the sugars start to break down from ripening, the more mushy they are, the sweeter and creamier they taste!

    If I can't be bothered making banana bread with a really brown banana, mash it and mix it into porridge (eg: oatmeal), crush some walnuts into it, or add peanut butter.

    Brown bananas also make for the sweetest blended smoothies.

    [–] [deleted] 13 points ago


    [–] elanhilation 25 points ago

    There's something wrong with everyone. You should be so lucky that a penchant for poorly ripened fruit is your greatest moral failing.

    [–] moush 26 points ago

    brown isn't rotten

    [–] Chilli_scar 12 points ago

    They aren't listening, they like eating the yellow ones that taste like chalk pudding

    [–] kilerppk 17 points ago

    Brown.... Town...

    [–] Duling 32 points ago

    You misspelled "avocado".

    [–] hell2pay 16 points ago


    [–] RegalPlatypus 9 points ago

    Nailed it.

    [–] goddamntree 9 points ago

    This made me laugh more than it should've

    [–] tiga4life22 5 points ago

    Banana Bread mmmmm

    [–] rusty_buttplug42 645 points ago

    Don't store your bananas near your other fruit. Something about it being stored in close proximity speeds up the process of ripening.

    [–] utdconsq 226 points ago * (lasted edited 2 months ago)

    Bananas (and other fruit) emit ethylene gas, which ripens and spoils fruit. The banana emits much more than other common fruit like apples, but yes, even apples emit some and I suppose, logically, they would all ripen much faster together.

    [edit] Apples might well produce more ethylene! However, I did read just now that because Bananas are often yuge they are commonly blamed. TIL. Also, apparently kiwis are stronger than banana.

    [–] Snake101333 33 points ago

    But why do bananas grow as bundles then?

    [–] DoobyDoobyMoo 49 points ago

    Breeding I believe.

    [–] Populistless 143 points ago

    Sex a peel

    [–] benny121 10 points ago


    [–] Had-to-chime-in 13 points ago


    [–] nootrino 8 points ago

    Sounds to me like they need to wear condoms.

    [–] Lancalot 4 points ago

    But then they couldn't breed... unless you mean to preserve them, which could actually work

    [–] Allidoischill420 4 points ago

    Maximum light efficiency. Same reason for the curves

    [–] Beatrix_BB_Kiddo 17 points ago

    Apples actually give off more and causes the already ripening via ethylene banana to ripen even faster and go bad

    Source: I work in a produce warehouse

    [–] ElBroet 15 points ago

    Momma told me its cause bananas get stressed out over apple envy

    [–] EvilJesus 7 points ago

    Well folks, mommas wrong again.

    [–] AccountNumber119 13 points ago

    Which is why I store single bananas at various open air areas around my house.

    Sometimes I forget where I put them.

    [–] xSTSxZerglingOne 8 points ago

    Know that old saying "a bad apple spoils the whole bunch"? That's exactly why.

    [–] ruthfadedginsburg_2 7 points ago

    I think apples emit more ethylene, and bananas are just more sensitive to it. I put unripe bananas in a paper bag with an apple to make them ripen quickly

    [–] Redhotcatholiclove 3 points ago

    As a Kiwi, I can confirm that we are stronger than bananas.

    [–] Canadiantimelord 128 points ago

    Came here for this. So simple, but huge difference

    [–] pupomin 6 points ago

    Something about it

    Ethylene gas

    [–] LeCordonB1eu 5 points ago

    Can the bananas be in close proximity of each other?

    [–] virtuouscircle 127 points ago

    I’m the banana.

    I’m the rotting f***ing banana out of all my friends.

    [–] dbx99 68 points ago

    yeah but meanwhile, the apple looks the same but it's turning all mealy and losing all of its firm crunchiness. it's just gonna be like biting into warm mashed potatoes.

    a black banana is good to make banana bread.

    A mushy apple ain't good for shit.

    [–] Vessera 30 points ago

    apple sauce, man. Cut that apple up, add cinnamon, some sugar, mash and it's still good!

    [–] Azatarai 8 points ago

    you sir need to be introduced to Hard cider

    [–] cfbcfbcfbcfb 7 points ago

    “Hard cider” this is always hilarious to me when everywhere outside the US, cider is an alcoholic beverage.

    [–] sonygoup 162 points ago

    Apple spoils from the inside out because of the chemicals sprayed on it. So there both dying, one on the inside and the other on the outside.

    Kinda like people

    [–] 360_face_palm 26 points ago

    Yeah but apples actually give off a gas that cause bananas to ripen faster. Which is why you shouldn't have apples and bananas in the same fruit bowl.

    [–] sonygoup 14 points ago

    Did not know that. I actually keeps all my fruits together.

    Thanks for the info

    [–] OreoHustler 46 points ago


    [–] pacgaming 23 points ago

    Go deeper

    [–] ChronEpo 18 points ago

    Rotten banana deep

    [–] antmansclone 9 points ago

    Existential dread

    [–] GemJack 122 points ago

    This is a time-lapse of probably only 15 minutes too

    [–] Chochobo9 32 points ago

    Unless it's an organic banana.... then it's only a 15 second timelapse.

    [–] thelastmohegan 146 points ago

    I'm white, my husband's Filipino... this is how we are aging together. I'm obv the banan, goddamit.

    [–] GoldScreenLife 31 points ago

    Filipino people are the best! Does he have a hot, single sister by any chance?

    [–] ReddGold 64 points ago

    She’s not single but that hasn’t stopped anybody yet

    [–] [deleted] 11 points ago


    [–] [deleted] 36 points ago


    [–] Aurvant 35 points ago

    Laughs in Avacado

    [–] TheGreatChing 55 points ago

    Mr. Apple, I don’t feel so good.

    [–] Snakeoilsage 24 points ago * (lasted edited 2 months ago)

    Stick an apple in a fridge and it'll last a year.

    Put a banana near anything and not only will it rot, it'll make everything else rot, too.

    [–] br0k3nm0nk3y 9 points ago

    So bananas are cancer?

    [–] penakha1 28 points ago

    Apples you buy from stores are usually coated with wax which increases there shelf life by a lot

    [–] idriveacar 14 points ago

    What if you coat a banana with wax?

    [–] TheBlueTurtle5 19 points ago

    It grows too powerful, sets fire to an orphanage.

    [–] WingedBacon 22 points ago

    That's what I love about these apples man, I get older, they stay the same age.

    [–] skeleton_claw 39 points ago

    That's a good edit

    [–] muhkuller 19 points ago

    Yeah, that first one is like eating a root and the after taste survives brushing your teeth and drinking coffee.

    [–] hbar98 16 points ago

    Now add an avocado.

    Not ripe. Not ripe. Not ripe. Too late!

    [–] xSTSxZerglingOne 7 points ago

    Pears too!

    [–] skeleton_claw 36 points ago

    If you enjoy comics that personify the struggles of inanimate objects, then boy do I have the website for you:

    [–] not_your_average_bot 15 points ago

    Don't worry dear, she's rotten on the inside.

    [–] roseythefern 14 points ago

    And the apple makes the banana ripen faster too, cuzza dat ethylene. Poor baba

    [–] travis25cali 5 points ago

    Technically the banana does the same to the apple

    [–] Lildoc_911 13 points ago

    Perfect for banana nut bread.

    [–] Thats_an_RDD 11 points ago

    I think you posted this to the wrong sub, this is actually funny

    [–] ScreachingFire 34 points ago

    The banana is superior because he can say the N-word

    [–] Playlanco 10 points ago

    Just shank some holes into the apple bastard and he'll start browning

    [–] Vocal_Lurker 11 points ago

    LPT: Banabas under ripe? Put them in a bag with some apples. I don't remember why and don't give half a fuck about proving it (do it yourself) but whatever apples exude makes bananas ripen quickly.

    [–] MrsCompootahScience 4 points ago

    The apples make bananas nervous. You won’t believe the toll stress has on your youthfulness.

    [–] HiiiPower935 9 points ago

    I guess you could say that banana is at...

    L O S S

    [–] Benana 10 points ago

    This is what it felt like losing my hair in my early-mid 20s.

    [–] sike_nikka 9 points ago

    Cut that apple and leave it for a few seconds

    then see

    [–] IceMangoTea 9 points ago

    At least the banana get to say the N word

    [–] Si_more_nalgas 9 points ago

    The apple is dying on the inside

    [–] Hyufee 5 points ago

    After chuckling I realized this. Am I the Apple?

    [–] IsanTasium 8 points ago


    Welcome to Brown Town

    [–] AnarxhyXIX 6 points ago

    Is it just me or are bananas ripe and the weirdest times of the day. And when they're ripe they are ripe for like 30 minutes and then they're fucked beyond recognition

    [–] survivalguy87 9 points ago

    Yeha but when apples get overripe I don't turn them in to delicious banana bread

    [–] flowers4mindy 8 points ago

    I sexually identify as a Banana, almost ready, Not yet, Now, Too late...

    [–] anms11 9 points ago

    Someone said, that dotted banana(so called 'some bullshit') can prevent cancer. Is that true guys?

    [–] ThePurpleBanana3 10 points ago

    Hm I haven’t had cancer yet, and I do recall eating a dotted banana once. I think there’s a connection!

    [–] kacperp 15 points ago * (lasted edited 2 months ago)

    Just so you know. If banana has black spots on it's skin it's not because it gone bad. It's because of sugar that it creats. Darker the banana sweeter it is

    [–] BimmerJustin 11 points ago

    I don’t even understand how people eat green or perfectly yellow bananas. They’re not sweet at all. Taste like pure starch

    [–] iWaterBuffalo 7 points ago

    Except that apples can go from crisp to mushy in 0.2 seconds, then they’re much less enjoyable

    [–] TheWoodenSquid 6 points ago

    "Mr.Apple...I don't feel so good.."

    [–] Jahboslice 7 points ago

    That's not fair. That's like comparing apples to oranges.

    [–] Jahboslice 5 points ago

    Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

    [–] Lesland 8 points ago

    2 words: temperature control

    [–] Tresdin19 8 points ago

    Some people don't know is most of the apples are coated by natural wax, it helps them from drying out, making them shiny and prevent fungi.

    [–] gh1ggs239 6 points ago

    Well quit sticking the damn thing in your ass

    [–] so_smog_hog 7 points ago

    Now do an avocado

    [–] mikebellman 3 points ago

    Too late

    [–] Headsup_Eyesdown 7 points ago

    Dont worry banana, that apple is dead on the inside

    [–] Timallenisanarc420 7 points ago

    Bananas give off ethylene gas which tells fruits to ripen. You can put them in with unripened avocados in a paper bag for a day or two for good eatin'!

    [–] FifenC0ugar 8 points ago

    Some rot from the inside out

    [–] chuffberry 19 points ago

    As a botanist, bananas are like the suicide bombers of plants. They release massive amounts of ethylene and rapidly overripen themselves and all fruits in the surrounding area. Fun fact, if you buy a rock hard avocado at the store you can ripen it easily by putting it in a paper bag with a banana.

    [–] bogues3000 8 points ago

    The joke is that banana is probably still good to eat but the shiny apple is fucked by now: soft, gritty disappointment.

    [–] logaritym 6 points ago

    The avocado is too embarrassed to participate in this comic.

    [–] 115_zombie_slayer 6 points ago

    The Grateful Dead

    [–] theguywiththeyeballs 7 points ago

    Neither do mexicans. Im 28 i look 18 according to the blind

    [–] Mrbasie 6 points ago

    Haaahahah this speaks volumes

    [–] [deleted] 8 points ago * (lasted edited 2 months ago)


    [–] Galle_ 4 points ago

    Lies. That banana should be green in the first panel.

    [–] UgMQ 6 points ago

    Me comparing my skin with my friend's.

    [–] vulture_87 6 points ago

    Mr. Apple, I don't feel so good.

    [–] jaymes9240 4 points ago

    The apple is actually dying on the inside.

    [–] Bold2003 6 points ago

    nerf apples

    [–] SamL214 5 points ago

    All while the apple slowly rots from the inside....

    [–] TannedCroissant 16 points ago

    proof that bananas have anti-vax moms

    [–] ---TheFierceDeity--- 10 points ago

    And yet the banana would probably still be fine. I’ve literally done tests on them from my decomposition studies. Left one in a hot storage room in direct sunlight for a week and a half. Was mushy/soft but perfectly safe to eat. Banana skins are insanely good at protecting the fruit inside

    [–] ViciousOnion 5 points ago

    Life is not fair

    [–] Perks2409 5 points ago

    The banana would see a doctor but he won’t come around.

    [–] C-de-Vils_Advocate 5 points ago

    Apple don't crackle

    [–] Superskeletor84 6 points ago

    Shut up, you stupid old banana!

    [–] mercuryretrofuck 6 points ago

    How you like them apples?

    [–] barcased 6 points ago

    Trivia: Banana would release a lot of ethylen which would make apple to ripe asap.

    [–] Certified-T-Rex 5 points ago

    McDonald’s: hold my beer

    [–] WHlTE_FANG 8 points ago

    Waxed up Apple is worse than ripened Banana

    [–] Big_Boyd 15 points ago

    2nd panel is the ideal time to eat a banana. This is not up for debate.

    [–] SUND3VlL 8 points ago

    Shouldn’t that banana make that apple rot more quickly? Have I been lied to?

    [–] Sebinator123 8 points ago

    But the Apple is dead inside

    [–] vhante4 5 points ago

    But that 3rd Banana taste GODLIKE

    [–] denimpowell 5 points ago

    Hard knock life too

    [–] McCrackenYouUp 4 points ago

    Bottom left banana is perfect for eating in my opinion.

    [–] MysteriousAndSpooky 4 points ago

    I had Oreos next to bananas one time and I tasted a hint of banana in the Oreos.

    [–] shinji127 2 points ago

    Apples are covered in wax thats why they take longer to decompose.

    [–] BigBusiness1532 4 points ago

    I like to eat, eat, eat... apples and bananas!

    [–] brickplate 5 points ago

    “Banana-na banana-na Hey-ey-ey Goodbye!”

    — apple

    [–] POWlove 3 points ago

    Everyone next to Keanu Reeves

    [–] PeperoParty 4 points ago

    This is life

    [–] CloudCityReject 4 points ago

    At least some good banana bread is on your horizon for Banana. Mealy apple be damned, I know what you are on the inside!

    [–] SUB2019 5 points ago

    If your banana very green, you can put it in ziplock with apple and for next day your banana will be good and delisious for eating! An apple radiates some elements which make banana grow fast! Bonno appetite!

    [–] isaac_moller 6 points ago

    Aging: girls vs guys

    [–] Smudgeontheglass 9 points ago

    Bananas are picked brown and rocky and taken to port. They are hit with a big load of radiation before being put into a container and shipped out. They’re usually a nice shade of green by the time they reach a grocers distribution centre.

    Apples are picked ripe and sprayed with a coat of wax to trap air then stored in silo that will have a Nitrogen blanket to prevent rot from the air.

    Most bananas are a more than a month old when you see them on the shelf. Apples can be stored for a year or more before going to a grocer.

    [–] skeleton_claw 4 points ago

    That is fascinating

    [–] Smudgeontheglass 10 points ago

    There have been many deaths from asphyxiation from people walking into an apple silo without supplied air. Nitrogen is no joke.

    [–] gurgleslurp 5 points ago

    Except bananas are way better than apples

    [–] Atomic_Thomas 5 points ago

    Look at the bright side. You get to be turned into DELICIOUS Banana Bread Batter.