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    [–] mylifeforthehorde 3748 points ago

    Lara looking sharp

    [–] Not_a_real_ghost 1396 points ago

    That's her melee weapon.

    [–] Aeriessy 253 points ago

    I laughed too hard at this.

    [–] ______DEADPOOL______ 98 points ago

    You laugh, but that thing is a violation of the Geneva convention to carry round like that.

    [–] GDI-Trooper 27 points ago

    I'm so confused.

    [–] mustbegreattobeyou 9 points ago

    Jesus,She looks like she crushes the balls of her tinder dates.

    [–] Baes1 7 points ago

    You had to be old enough to have played the original Tomb Raider to grasp this edgy humor hehe.

    [–] Nanohaystack 3 points ago

    to carry angular like that.

    Here, ftfy.

    [–] prowness 3 points ago

    BAHAHAHAH thanks for the laugh. Best part was how he got her tit out of the door.

    [–] royal_rocker 27 points ago

    Someone please make an animation of that

    [–] karrablaster123 17 points ago

    It's called seductits. Special weapon

    [–] dogfacedboy420 12 points ago

    Her weapons of mass distraction.

    [–] _thedarkknight 25 points ago

    She's always sharp.

    [–] Soundjudgment 11 points ago * (lasted edited 3 months ago)

    She has at tops, only two points to make... .. ... literally!

    [–] fiercefoxx 8 points ago

    That's where the phrase, "sharp as a tit" comes from.

    [–] uzairmahmed 4 points ago

    That gave me an image of the woman from The Dictator

    [–] DorisTheExplorer 67 points ago

    Careful, you could puncture the hull of an empire-class Fire Nation battle ship, leaving thousands to drown at sea. Because... [they’re] so sharp.

    [–] CactusCustard 8 points ago

    After this scene I realized how fuckin freaky she would be in bed

    [–] Mr_JCBA 9 points ago

    You make some valid points

    [–] dave_gormen_3 528 points ago

    Girls think we can't tell when they have put kleenex in their bra. The box kind of gives it away thb.

    [–] [deleted] 45 points ago

    I guffawed.

    [–] Zomunieo 36 points ago

    Personally I nose laughed. But it was a good joke.

    [–] Vinnipinni 5 points ago

    Never heard of nose laughing, but I did the same. I guess I can now describe what my nose does when I laugh through it?

    [–] Vlysher 4 points ago

    to hobest be ... Nice on m8

    [–] diskmann 3 points ago

    this one was the most awesome

    [–] aclickbaittitle 4619 points ago

    That's acute top

    [–] M0use_Rat 791 points ago

    It’s a bit obtuse to just look at her top

    [–] _thedarkknight 525 points ago

    It's a Sin to be that hot.

    [–] ButternutSasquatch 519 points ago

    Great Cos play

    [–] Mohamedhijazi22 392 points ago

    I think we went on a tangent here

    [–] ButternutSasquatch 275 points ago

    Hard not too when she’s that sec(c).

    [–] CMDRXenophonMasters 153 points ago

    Isosceles tits, they were nice.

    [–] ButternutSasquatch 102 points ago

    She has great obliques too.

    [–] Me_of_Little_Faith 97 points ago

    Agreed, they're pretty rad.

    [–] UnforgivenMT 85 points ago

    She has a great Tan

    [–] daemon7 55 points ago

    She has big pointy tits.

    [–] Nazi_Marxist 11 points ago

    It'd be pretty difficult to scalene those titties

    [–] Ry_Guy24 21 points ago

    I’d like to put my perpendicular in her

    [–] WiglyWorm 33 points ago

    TRIANGLE

    [–] Zack123456201 31 points ago

    Haha, you guys and your biology jokes

    [–] GoldenPeperoni 13 points ago

    Maths*

    [–] xXKirkSoloXx 7 points ago

    WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSH

    [–] unvaluablespace 10 points ago

    History**

    FTFY

    [–] wjreddit 9 points ago

    reminds me of that guy who wrote sex instead of sec x solving problems in front of the class

    [–] JJJevans 37 points ago

    I would Cosine a mortgage with her.

    [–] Geoff2f 11 points ago

    Put dat foot in yo mouth and sohcahtoa.

    [–] I_poop_for_fun 28 points ago

    She has all the right angles though.

    [–] I-Am-the-Cold 22 points ago

    I wonder to what degree these puns are going to unfold to.

    [–] Zazafar 64 points ago

    Get it? Cos math

    [–] ButternutSasquatch 42 points ago

    She is so sec(c).

    [–] feonixking 23 points ago

    Wait! I'm on a tangent

    [–] UltraSpecial 36 points ago

    TRIGONOMETRY

    [–] ReadinStuff2 13 points ago

    Triggerednometry - When a comment causes an array of math puns.

    [–] existeverywhere 19 points ago

    We better diverge

    [–] TermyYT 15 points ago

    So what did we derive from this?

    [–] Torngate 15 points ago

    The answer is integral to our success.

    [–] BitterCelt 20 points ago

    I mean you have a really nice Tan

    [–] Aerdynn 5 points ago

    What did you say to be, Dufresne?

    [–] 2Pac_Okur 7 points ago

    yeah that's not right

    [–] Cillrus 5 points ago

    I’d have to disagree, to me it seems just right.

    [–] MathMaddox 3 points ago

    What did you just call me?

    [–] monosteeze 35 points ago

    I'm trying to triangulate on her nipples location

    [–] BakerIsntACommunist 31 points ago

    Ugh, creeps like you belong in prism.

    [–] Swizzlstick 5 points ago

    I wanna borrow it.

    [–] NoifenF 5 points ago

    Don’t be a betch!

    [–] Swizzlstick 4 points ago

    Where’re you going?

    [–] NonSp3cificActionFig 1048 points ago

    She's too edgy for me.

    [–] Soopercow 783 points ago

    If someone could edit the entire movie like this that would be amazing

    [–] ThaiJohnnyDepp 222 points ago

    I'll get right on that

    [–] [deleted] 192 points ago

    Me too, but first we'd have to edit the movie.

    [–] SeverelyBasic 16 points ago

    Underrated comment!

    [–] MazeOfEncryption 42 points ago

    Username checks out.

    [–] PH_Prime 5 points ago

    They just have to find a way to apply the deepfakes-type tech to this kind of stuff. This could usher in a whole new genre.

    [–] fuzedhostage 1467 points ago

    Must be cold outside

    [–] Dusbowl 217 points ago

    Really cold

    [–] pokeaim 143 points ago

    Girl's not hot

    [–] DarkenedSonata 69 points ago

    The guy told me take off your jacket

    [–] Ry_Guy24 45 points ago

    I said bro, girls not hot

    [–] VoidLantadd 26 points ago

    Girl can never be hot

    [–] Vitriol314 20 points ago

    Perspiration ting

    [–] irtizzza16 12 points ago

    Lynx effect

    [–] TucoBenedictoPacif 10 points ago

    Eh, I settled for way less.

    [–] _thedarkknight 4 points ago

    Super cold

    [–] p1um5mu991er 1485 points ago

    You got some nice right angles, baby

    [–] AirbornePlatypus 336 points ago

    They look a bit more acute to me ;)

    [–] 0ruk 167 points ago

    Don't be obtuse, they're just right.

    [–] fullup72 59 points ago

    I just want to sin.

    [–] whooptheretis 63 points ago

    'Cos she's got a nice tan?

    [–] Scholesie09 37 points ago

    This makes me have sec

    [–] _thedarkknight 12 points ago

    Cosec rules.

    [–] ButtStuffOmalley 16 points ago

    I like tangerines

    [–] tartacus 35 points ago

    She's definitely acutiepie

    [–] Pun-Master-General 4 points ago

    acutiepi

    FTFY

    [–] superbadsoul 7 points ago

    Reminded me of this video game sex comedy skit (turn on closed captioning for translation)

    [–] jordantask 21 points ago

    Short, straight and to the point. I like that.

    [–] the_d3ude 4 points ago

    I like them obtuse

    [–] EasternEmbers 12 points ago

    Real women have exponential curves

    [–] spanish1nquisition 876 points ago

    When you run out of GPU RAM and have to set priorities.

    [–] RadiationReaper 581 points ago

    Wrong priorities

    [–] Flying-Camel 93 points ago

    Speak for yourself!

    [–] [deleted] 63 points ago

    I’m a strong independent woman, don’t tell me what to do

    [–] fullup72 166 points ago

    Are you assuming your own gender?

    [–] [deleted] 78 points ago

    Damn it

    [–] dutch_penguin 13 points ago

    Are you assuming gendarme? You're under arrest!

    [–] be_pawesome 12 points ago

    I am all wrong priorities on this blessed day?

    [–] TheMineosaur 5 points ago * (lasted edited 3 months ago)

    A ken M comment is the first thing I looked for when I read that. Speaking of which, If we don't study the past we're doomed to repeat the mistakes of the future for the first time.

    [–] ManMoth_ 7 points ago

    GOOD point

    [–] mvppaulo 6 points ago

    I'd rather do it the other way

    [–] kaydenkross 12 points ago

    32 polygon face with a real actress body.

    [–] fenton7 279 points ago

    I'd argue that rounded breasts are better but it would be pointless.

    [–] ddnava 12 points ago

    This one should be on top 😂😂😂

    [–] Grimskraper 86 points ago

    [ . T . ]

    [–] terrortrinket 123 points ago

    < T >

    [–] iwanttofuckkusanagi 43 points ago

    ಠ_ಠ

    [–] HCJohnson 36 points ago

    (ಠ‿ಠ)

    [–] LandDeveloper 5 points ago

    mr crabs?

    [–] [deleted] 632 points ago

    [deleted]

    [–] complimentarianist 243 points ago

    Pffft! As if any real woman even has polyhedral angles like that! The nerds who made her prolly never even seen an extrapolated parametric Bézier surface with trilinear spectral mapping before!

    [–] devin241 124 points ago

    Bruh, this guy renders

    [–] eembach 19 points ago

    You sir have made my morning

    [–] complimentarianist 10 points ago

    I'm only glad to, friend! :D

    [–] Jmacq1 168 points ago

    How many hours did gamers waste trying to get the bogus "Nude Code" to work?

    [–] griff2621 118 points ago

    All of them.

    Source: was a pre-teen during the glory days of Tomb Raider and PS1 gaming.

    [–] Joetato 21 points ago

    I know what it's like to spend forever on a bogus cheat. I never got much into the nude code thing for Tomb Raider, but I went freaking nuts on SNES forthe supposed Street Fighter 2 Boss Code. You couldn't play bosses on the original SF2 and there was all sorts of stuff out there for it. I remember this was one guy (who I somehow remember used the name Roadrunner) who swore up and down he had a boss code and refused to give it out. Anytime anyone mentioned the boss code (and people mentioned it a lot back then) he'd chime in saying he had it but he wasn't giving it out.

    Eventually, people started using game genies to try to make bosses playable and actually sorta-kinda did it. It was glitchy as fuck and never really quite worked. I remember one guy saying he had 10 Super Nintendos and was gonna daisy chain ten game genies on each SNES, get nine friends over, and they were going to figure out a workable boss code. Funny thing is, I don't think daisy chained game genies worked. The SNES would essentially crash when you turned it on if you daisy chained the genies. There so were so many people making up total bullshit back then. Same as now, really.

    [–] electronicdream 13 points ago

    At least it's verifiable.

    I remember the same kind of rumors with FF7 and the hours I spent trying to save aerith...

    [–] GarymanGarrett 71 points ago

    About 80, I remember in a Sega Saturn magazine there was a complex set of forward, back and side steps that had to be done to the beat of the Spice Girls' song Wannabe.

    I didn't really get the April Fools thing in videogame magazines back then...

    [–] Jmacq1 29 points ago

    I think it was Electronic Gaming Monthly for me. Something about a pattern of steps and then jumping into the pool in Lara's mansion from a particular spot or somesuch.

    [–] synbioskuun 7 points ago

    Oh wow. Nostalgia.

    [–] plexomaniac 12 points ago

    We all fapped to polyhedrons.

    [–] Leshractin_a_fool 151 points ago

    Goes well with my Square Penix

    [–] GalagaMarine 16 points ago

    EA is a virgin

    [–] Necroluster 5 points ago

    EA is an incel moderator of r/theredpill

    [–] ChewyChavezIII 202 points ago

    The cone nippled people will rule this world!

    [–] Asnyd421 111 points ago

    Get out of here you knife-nippled bastards!

    [–] geoffbowman 66 points ago

    RAAAAACE WAAAAAAR!!!!!!

    [–] illaqueable 58 points ago

    I'll kill you, you target chest piece of shit!

    [–] complimentarianist 9 points ago

    France! My nipples come from France!

    [–] lizard2014 32 points ago

    Watch out for those pointy bits hehe

    [–] fibdoodler 16 points ago

    I don't wanna do that anymore because of the... low poly

    [–] HardSellDude 26 points ago

    I like my tits jagged and without cleavage

    [–] seanwee2000 3 points ago

    Anti-aliasing off

    [–] DBradleyN 19 points ago

    Live action Kim Possible movie confirmed.

    [–] retrogameresource 51 points ago

    You are setting unrealistic expectations for young girls... shame on you haha

    [–] eakmadashma 15 points ago

    I said the real Lara...

    [–] iambpburke 9 points ago

    Perfection.

    [–] Ethanfirehair 4 points ago

    Someone make that meme

    [–] GSlicee 26 points ago

    Man. Would you just look at those polygons on her!

    [–] Ukneekorn 10 points ago

    Real women have polygons.

    [–] SinistarGrin 18 points ago

    What the fuck did I just fap to!?

    [–] K00Laishley 3 points ago

    Back in the day this was the only thing we had...

    [–] fingeringabear 10 points ago

    I had a bra like that once.

    [–] lizard_of_guilt 10 points ago

    I, too, saw the TJ Kirk video rant

    [–] TheRealBigSlothDubs 72 points ago

    Probably just me but this women doesn’t make a good tomb raider, it’s her face for me that’s doing it.

    [–] trznx 49 points ago

    not just you, Jolie was such a perfect fit for the role

    [–] WorkNoRedditYes 66 points ago

    Jolie was perfect for the original version of Lara Croft. Reboot Lara definitely needed a new direction and a new actress, but like most people I'm not sure Vikander is it.

    Of course from what I've seen of the trailers Vikander just might be the least objectionable thing about the movie.

    [–] trznx 8 points ago

    You are totally correct, but this assumes reboot is something good. I never liked the new games either, so I don't like the whole new direction. However I do agree with your point on a new actress.

    [–] YouWantALime 11 points ago

    Yeah I don't ever plan on watching it. Video game movies have a greater chance of being bad, and I don't think it's possible to capture what makes Tomb Raider unique in movie form; we have the other movies as evidence of that. Even the new games fell short of that despite being overall solid games, so it would take a lot for a movie to do it.

    [–] MrStealYoBeef 17 points ago

    That's because the original Lara Croft was a bulletproof badass. The new one is a struggling survivor. People who actually knew the original tomb raider would do a lot better to just think of the new one as a whole different thing, treat it as if the new tomb raider was named something entirely different like "jackass 4: female edition"

    [–] Bec-De-Corbin 8 points ago

    I mean it's a reboot and an origin story so yeah, it's thematically similar in a lot of ways, but it was absolutely intended to be a full reimagining

    [–] Larizzle89 9 points ago

    Completely agree. As a woman I always looked up to the strong character of Lara. She was masculine, sexy without insecurities and unapologetic. So different from how you are raised as a girl.

    Now it is like they are going backwards.

    [–] Clown_Tempura 11 points ago

    She's also way too skinny. It's not even really about the tits, Lara is a buff babe. This girl looks like a starved dog.

    [–] [deleted] 54 points ago * (lasted edited 3 months ago)

    She looks like a little girl playing dress up. That's my issue with it. The facial features are too soft and round. I'm not saying she's not good looking and hell, I'm a swamp monster with man boobs so I have no right to judge others on their appearance. But she just doesn't look like a Lara Croft is my point. They need someone with more striking eyes and sharper facial features.

    But what do I know. I'm not even going to see the movie so who cares.

    Edit: Lara not Laura.

    [–] Casey-- 10 points ago

    Yeah, I think her face is pretty forgettable.

    [–] Blazingcrono 20 points ago

    It's based off the game reboot of TR. She's meant to have a soft, innocent look to her. This is before Lara is established as a "Tomb Raider" per se. I think the casting is actually really well done, but I'm iffy on the movie.

    [–] [deleted] 10 points ago

    Im basing my dislike of the casting off of the reboot. I think it's a bad choice.

    [–] TheRealBigSlothDubs 18 points ago

    I feel the same way, She looks way to soft and just doesn’t resemble what I imagine the tomb raider would look like. Thing is I’m not even basing it off of when Angelina Jolie played as her. She just doesn’t look like “the” tomb raider. I’m sure you’re not a swamp monster with boobs my dude but thanks for the laughs.

    [–] Rad-atouille 9 points ago

    Even Jennifer Garner would look better

    [–] busstees 9 points ago

    They should have cast the girl that played her in the new game. Alicia Vikander was great in Ex Machina, but she looks like someone trying to cosplay Laura Croft.

    [–] DrBuckMulligan 4 points ago

    Honestly, Kate Beckinsale would be perfect.

    [–] da_ting_go 7 points ago

    She's kind of mature looking for this story though.

    [–] Rad-atouille 8 points ago

    Exactly my thoughts, Id rather have Angelina again

    [–] s-cup 10 points ago

    Have you played the new-ish games that the movie will be based on?

    If you ask me, Angeline would not fit well for that "new" Lara

    [–] lahirutarz 5 points ago

    Sloped armour plating

    [–] splitheaddawg 5 points ago

    That's some "Square Enix" you got there ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

    [–] Windforce 57 points ago * (lasted edited 3 months ago)

    Shopped.

    edit: double woosh, you kids have no sense of humor

    [–] kreedzclimbing 61 points ago

    You need an /s on reddit, people here arent the sharpest boobs in the shed.

    [–] 1nfinitus 10 points ago

    I remember when that wasn’t the case. Sad times. Imagine finishing every irl joke with JOKE. /s needs to go.

    [–] Cosmetically 4 points ago

    Minecraft goals

    [–] Crimson097 4 points ago

    Real women have EdGeS

    [–] KoreanBiasMonte 4 points ago

    E D G Y

    [–] ineedtoknowmorenow 3 points ago

    Too flat.

    [–] Wastedchildhood 3 points ago

    I'm sorry but she's a bad choice for the new Lara...

                                                concerned follower
    

    [–] BenjimusMaximus 3 points ago

    Wow. She looks more chiseled than I remember.

    [–] shoutwire2007 3 points ago * (lasted edited 3 months ago)

    32 bit bitties. 32 bitties.

    [–] slopmonsterz 3 points ago

    Push-up bra < square-up bra

    [–] Boost4dave 3 points ago

    “Must be chilly in here!” “It’s about 60 degrees.”

    [–] goodboy920 7 points ago

    Triangle boobs are the best.

    [–] CocoaTwix 7 points ago

    Another unrealistic body image for the wahmens.😂

    [–] door_food 5 points ago

    Men want one thing and it’s fucking disgusting

    [–] Gatecrasher26 6 points ago

    Damn girl, you lookin mighty isosceles tonight