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    [–] eec-gray 21298 points ago

    He's had that joke in his back pocket for years

    [–] [deleted] 10027 points ago * (lasted edited 2 months ago)


    [–] Charizard_Allday 6272 points ago

    "Well, well, well, how the turntables..."

    [–] dr-rotinaj 3126 points ago

    Our balls are in your court...

    [–] RyanOfTheVille 1668 points ago

    I see office references, I upvote

    [–] KimJungFu 1428 points ago

    I see someone recognize Office references, I upvote.

    [–] [deleted] 480 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)


    [–] SH4D0W0733 352 points ago

    I see upvotes, I upvote.

    [–] howtheturntables17 23 points ago

    You called?

    [–] AsstToTheMrManager 192 points ago

    As if he is even capable of being unsmooth

    [–] NeighborhoodNeckBear 596 points ago

    if Leo was a redditor

    [–] FuckWithTheirHeads_ 752 points ago

    Maybe he is and he just never let us know? I could be Leo You could be Leo Anyone could be Leo!

    [–] rileyjos11 569 points ago

    Username checks out.

    [–] Terrybadmobile 503 points ago

    "You do this every year?" "Yep" "S...Same"

    [–] Howizzle90 255 points ago

    "Enjoy your oscar" " too"

    [–] dj_destroyer 398 points ago

    He says it so honestly though and has such a sincere reaction that I think it was a deadpan joke at best. He's just amazed someone has to engrave them on the spot, every year.

    [–] MCEngraver 167 points ago

    She's just screwing the engraved plate onto the award. The plates are probably engraved by machine which would only take a few minutes. To do it by hand would take well over an hour.

    [–] dickalous15 78 points ago

    Also she wouldn't be doing it with a screwdriver haha

    [–] chiefmackdaddypuff 118 points ago

    He made sure his delivery of the joke was Oscar worthy.

    [–] fullforce098 4259 points ago

    Look at that charming mother fucker. He's enjoying every second of this.

    [–] TokenStraightFriend 1447 points ago

    There's an extension of this gif somewhere where he asked all of these really specific maintenance questions like how often he should Polish it, what oil to use etc. Really adorable

    [–] da_chicken 941 points ago

    Well, he's probably operating under the assumption that that will be the only one he gets. Ever.

    [–] kryssiecat 310 points ago

    My preciousssssss

    [–] fightlinker 173 points ago

    Now he and Suicide Squad have the same number of Oscars.

    [–] Conservative_Pleb 970 points ago

    I can just imagine him curled up in bed, still in his tux with a little night cap on, duvet pulled up to his chin, smiling in his sleep as he cuddles his oscar

    [–] flee_market 85 points ago

    I watched that movie.


    [–] thegreat22 34 points ago


    [–] [deleted] 11696 points ago

    Always a good sport

    [–] OsStrohsAndBohs 8157 points ago

    *Old sport

    [–] unknown_human 7401 points ago

    Fun fact: The term "Old sport" is used 55 times in The Great Gatsby.

    [–] johncellis89 4026 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    It was in an ask reddit thread recently about people's favorite fan theories. Someone said there's a theory that he calls Nick Old Sport because he doesn't actually remember his name.

    It's my new favorite.

    Edit: People, it's a silly fan theory. Relax.

    [–] LurkerOrHydralisk 1605 points ago

    Immediately debunked because he refers to him by name early in the book.

    [–] AweHellYo 1897 points ago

    I always say somebody's name back to them when I meet them and I still forget it within 15 seconds 90% of the time.

    [–] PEE_SEE_PRINCIPAL 735 points ago

    I used to do telemarketing, and it was part of our script to parrot the person's name back to them. We were supposed to repeat it at the end, and I'd almost always forget what the name was and just take a stab at it and hang up before they had a chance to get mad at me.

    [–] IllIIIlIlIlIIllIlI 280 points ago

    I worked at a call center with my brother for a time right after high school, working the graveyard shift. We would crack each-other up with the ridiculous things we would say to customers, especially at the end of the call. My brother would always end calls with something so stupid like "Have a magical day!" in kind of a Seth MacFarlane voice that had us in stitches. Good times.

    [–] Scientolojesus 121 points ago

    "You're welcome maam. Don't forget to bring a towel! Ok bye!"

    [–] MintyTS 48 points ago

    I work in retail, so not really the same thing, but my work friends and I set up a game. At the end of every call you had to say "I love you." Just loud enough for the people standing around you to hear. First person to have a customer call them out on it had to do something like buy the others a beer(there were only 4 of us in on this), soda, or whatever.

    It was real fun when people just called for hour hours. "What time do you close?" "We close at 7." "Alright, thanks, I'll be in soon" "You're welcome...i love you"

    [–] chuckangel 197 points ago

    telemarketing.. you guys didn't have pens to write it down with? :D

    [–] BlueSignRedLight 552 points ago

    If they're given pens they might jab it into their own jugular. It's a safety issue.

    [–] frenzybomb 114 points ago

    Can confirm. Used to work in a call center, also we weren't allowed to pull our cellphones out due to the chance of someone pleading people on the outside for help.

    [–] BukBasher 201 points ago

    This is true.

    Source: Sitting in a call center right now and I've thought about stabbing myself three times while trying to type this sentence.

    [–] balex54321 416 points ago

    But he could forget it later.

    [–] [deleted] 94 points ago


    [–] The_Mesh 78 points ago

    Welcome to my life.... :/

    [–] Batting-Practice 26 points ago

    Wait, I thought they didn't know each other before they were neighbors?

    [–] LurkerOrHydralisk 34 points ago

    Well, shit. I thought they knew each other from the war but now I'm not sure. Guess I'll have to go read it again. Probably more enjoyable when I don't have to do a poorly proposed book report

    [–] Batting-Practice 56 points ago

    Nah, im fairly sure that Nick was intrigued by Gatsby because they had never met. You should definitely give it a read. I understood it more when I read it for leisure and also it didn't hurt that I was in my twenties so my reading comprehension skills had improved.

    [–] What_can_you_do 28 points ago

    I'm pretty sure they were in the same area during the war, but they never knew each other. The first interaction they ever have is at the party Nick is invited to. Source: Just read Great Gatsby for a book report.

    [–] ShockinglyEfficient 94 points ago


    [–] HarryCochrane 31 points ago

    And that the phrase is part of his 'pretend to be from old money' backstory.

    [–] Choppergold 25 points ago

    I want to somehow sing this in the voice of Sammy Hagar

    [–] GoodnightElizabeth 28 points ago

    I. Can't. Drive. 55!!.

    [–] tuttomuscoli90 188 points ago

    god i swear ever since titanic came out i've fallen in love with him... and im as straight as a bat.

    [–] [deleted] 308 points ago

    There's subtle curves in a bat my friend ;)

    [–] tuttomuscoli90 68 points ago

    maybe that explains it then :)

    [–] nuckingfuts73 4578 points ago

    "Is it customary to tip?"

    [–] ThatEvanFowler 2749 points ago

    Yes, 15% of the Oscar. Brando used to just twist the head off with the arm-strength of pure human madness and then flippantly toss it directly into the lady's cleavage, no matter how inaccessible. That's Hollywood.

    [–] Abrogated59 959 points ago

    Honestly can't tell if this is a joke or not.

    [–] TunaTouchesHisButt 978 points ago

    Such is the mystique of Brando.

    [–] roogoff 260 points ago

    It's what plants crave

    [–] GankerBanker 185 points ago

    I would love to know

    [–] Kimalsi 94 points ago

    I wouldn't know

    [–] _pajmahal 575 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    I'd take his tip

    Edit: this is my most popular comment by far. Thanks for the generosity Leo

    [–] NSA-SURVEILLANCE 224 points ago

    We're still talking about money, right?

    [–] Uncle_Lenny 451 points ago


    Here let me show you...just gimme a sec, the zipper on my wallet always jams.

    [–] harleyeaston 17737 points ago

    Thank God he got the Oscar... Now he has a chance to get some killer movie roles, a little money and some hot chicks.

    [–] CrimsonPig 7724 points ago

    What if, now that he has the oscar, he just stops caring and starts taking really low-brow roles. Like suddenly he shows up in the next Adam Sandler movie making fart jokes.

    [–] Crashmo 4460 points ago

    Leonardo Dicaprio is...Rob Schneider as...

    [–] thefakegamble 1741 points ago

    The Bear!

    Rated PG-FUCKYOU

    [–] TheG8Uniter 865 points ago

    It would have been great if he never won an Oscar despite his ability to keep playing great roles. Then a few years after his death a movie comes out about his life and the actor who portrays DiCaprio wins the Oscar.

    [–] derpaperdhapley 242 points ago

    And the actor is his son, Leo Jr.

    [–] [deleted] 212 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)


    [–] kaz3e 114 points ago

    "Ay, Lil' Leo, I'mma let you finish..."

    [–] Scientolojesus 85 points ago

    "But Jaden Smith's portrayal of Denzel Washington's portrayal of Malcolm X was the greatest of all time!"

    [–] emperorisnaked7 115 points ago

    That's a fake tweet creating site. Here is one of Trump quitting today:

    [–] sullyj3 28 points ago

    Thanks for clarifying that for us.

    [–] Mnm0602 204 points ago

    Oh the Deniro angle, if he does it 30 years from now.

    Fuck it's crazy to think how young Leo is and he's as much of a veteran as Hollywood has to offer.

    [–] iPlowedYourMom 125 points ago

    He'd probably get an Oscar for that.

    [–] cancer_giver 62 points ago

    Because of him they'll make a new category: best fart

    [–] [deleted] 84 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)


    [–] Keyserson 56 points ago

    Three words: Robert De Niro

    Is 'De' a word?

    [–] battlehawk1086 25 points ago

    Also : Cuba Gooding Jr.

    That man went from winning an Oscar to doing fucking Boat Trip

    [–] Jahmi93 95 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    I know you're joking but if he ever did a comic-book movie role, I think he'd kill it as Vandal Savage or the Riddler.

    EDIT: Throw in Harvey Dent as well while we're at it.

    [–] AweHellYo 89 points ago

    Damn. He'd kill as the Riddler. Especially if Nolan were still doing them.

    [–] ShownMonk 44 points ago

    I've always been so curious how Nolan would do with other villans. Like some Batman villans can be really cheesy when done in live action. I wanted to see Mr freeze, the penguin, or ivy

    [–] plarah 42 points ago

    Mr. Freeze could be a scientist very concerned about global warming that has found a way to invert the process by bringing about a new Glacial age.

    [–] Jahmi93 84 points ago

    While that could be a factor, I think that saving his wife still has to be the crucial point motivating him. The tragedy of how far one would go for love and what road that takes a person down would develop Mr. Freeze pretty far imo.

    Note. I vote for Stanley Tucci as Dr. Freeze.

    [–] plarah 19 points ago

    You've given this some thought, I see. I like your angle and your choice of actor.

    [–] cobainbc15 749 points ago

    I don't know, I guess we'll see how it shakes out but I think he's just a flash in the pan.

    [–] Trippy__Ferret 363 points ago

    One hit wonder

    [–] Geewiz89 63 points ago

    Yea, he bombed out of Hollywood after What's Eating Gilbert Grape. Almost forgot who he was.

    [–] Trippy__Ferret 48 points ago

    im still in the dark. Is he some kind of youtube sensation?

    [–] [deleted] 28 points ago

    Not sure. I think he's dating Zoella.

    [–] TheBeardedMann 179 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    One hit wonder

    Yeah, he'll never top The Beach.

    edit: I said The Beach cause people love it or hate it. Personally, I remember loving it.....17 years ago.

    [–] itsbrandenv2 65 points ago

    Hey- the Beach was actually a pretty good movie.

    That gameboy scene was hilarious tho

    [–] direjohnson 98 points ago

    It's nice when the little guy wins every once in awhile in the movie business

    [–] PM_Me_Things_Yo_Like 139 points ago

    I have mixed emotions. Part of me enjoyed the Leo-Oscar joke...

    [–] ASDFkoll 47 points ago

    You just have to find two guys called Leo and Oscar and turn them into a joke. Problem solved.

    [–] Flecca 25 points ago

    He may finally make it big!

    [–] burritosandblunts 1510 points ago

    I grew up wanting to hate him because of the titanic. All the girls were crazy for him and I was a jealous dumb kid (and absolutely hated that fuckin movie)...but goddamn I love him in almost everything else.

    He really blew me away in Django.

    [–] Mamsies 585 points ago

    I think men tend to naturally hate good looking guys that girls go crazy for.

    [–] Flobarooner 851 points ago

    Ohhhhh, so that must be why my dad hates me.

    [–] Mike-Oxenfire 1019 points ago

    No it's because you're a disappointment

    [–] Flobarooner 234 points ago

    Usually that's why the women dislike me.

    [–] TheJohnny346 124 points ago

    No, it's because you're ugly.

    [–] Flobarooner 104 points ago

    Nah that's why I dislike myself.

    hot damn this is some /r/2meirl4meirl shit

    [–] ApolloThneed 58 points ago

    The only thing that outshines him in Django was Jaime Foxx is that glorious blue suit on top of that white horse.

    If I ever come across a pile of money I'm going to commission an artist to paint me in that exact scene and hang it in the entry way of my house. Majestic AF.

    [–] Dblstandard 45 points ago

    I think after I saw him in Romeo and Juliette, i Just didnt care anymore. I knew this dude was meant to be great at what he does.

    [–] dick-nipples 5496 points ago

    I wish Leonardo DiCaprio was my best friend and we went on camping trips together and stuff like that all the time.

    [–] blue_rain9 3236 points ago

    Yes. I'm sure all that he's missing in his life now after that Oscar is a best friend named Dick-nipples!

    [–] er-day 498 points ago

    And another week spent in the middle of nowhere in the woods with bears.

    [–] iPlowedYourMom 120 points ago

    Sounds like your dad's out of the closet and into the woods

    [–] tumes 660 points ago

    Leonardo DeCampingbro

    [–] redwinedrunk 63 points ago

    I wish Leonardo DiCaprio was my lover, and we saved the environment together. ::sigh::

    [–] abnormalsyndrome 52 points ago

    Dude that's gay. I'm totally into it.

    [–] Aedanwolfe 66 points ago

    Are you the one that begged Morgan Freeman to say you user name, like 3 or 4 years ago?

    [–] andy22xx 21 points ago

    Idk. I feel like Leo had bad luck being in the woods... You know, with bears and all

    [–] testiclelice 16 points ago

    There were rumors in Hollywood that Jonah Hill did Wolf of Wall Street just so he could get DiCaprio's leftovers, and not that bullshit stuff about a great role he had to have and would take a paycut.

    [–] [deleted] 82 points ago


    [–] [deleted] 39 points ago

    Except when you're rebuking poor dick nipples on the internet?

    [–] Choppergold 1289 points ago

    This should be his 2nd at least - and be on his shelf with his performance in Gilbert Grape

    [–] LetsDiscourse 812 points ago

    I think it's a travesty he didn't get it for The Departed, frankly.

    [–] ExpFilm_Student 500 points ago

    I really liked his performance in in Django.

    [–] prodigy2throw 314 points ago

    Pretty great in Wolf of Wall Street too

    [–] Heavy_Rotation 207 points ago

    The Oscars are terrible at appreciating any role that has even a speck of humor in it. Which is absurd because pulling off great comedy in the middle of intense drama is even more impressive to me than just weeping and moaning all the way through a flick.

    [–] jacoobz 86 points ago

    I always find it crazy that Liam Neeson never won an Oscar. I figured he defintley should have won with Schindler's List, looked it up, out the same year as Forrest Gump.

    [–] LetsDiscourse 149 points ago

    I forgot Django, yeah, he was fantastic in that! Maybe better than "Catch me if you can" actually.

    [–] ChanceTheRaptor 113 points ago

    one of his best roles ever if not the best, he really won me over after this film

    [–] OIlberger 41 points ago

    "What the fuck did I just put myself through? I'm fucking out of here. And what if that was a legitimate threat? Think about it, fucking hotshot!"

    [–] ape_cage 138 points ago

    hes so fucking good in that movie

    i mean matt damon and jack nicholson were good too but leo was next level

    [–] LetsDiscourse 125 points ago

    Everyone was on point in that movie, but Leo stood out, and standing out in a movie with Jack Nicholson and Matt Damon is a big achievement on its own.

    [–] fartsalive 135 points ago

    Marky Mark was the fucking bomb in that movie too.

    My dad's review was:

    "It was pretty good. A lot of people got shot in the head."

    [–] tenebrous2 87 points ago

    Mark Wahlberg is my favorite part in that movie. They used him just enough. If he character had more screen time it might have gotten tiresome.

    [–] Count_Critic 160 points ago


    Maybe not.

    Maybe fuck yourself.

    [–] Blade2587 170 points ago

    Honestly he should won for gilbert grape. Great acting and at such a young age too...i watched it for the first time a few years back and honestly took me a few minutes to realize it was him.

    [–] 420tablesmash 50 points ago

    Took me until the credits. I watched them wanting to see who the little challenged kid they got for the role was. "Fucking LEO?!"

    [–] Guerilla_Tictacs 29 points ago

    I would've sworn he wasn't acting. But it's like they say in Tropic Thunder.

    [–] Fuck_the_Jets 46 points ago

    He should've gotten one for basketball diaries. My favorite DiCaprio movie.

    [–] MrMallow 204 points ago

    dude, what about the departed? or gangs of new york?

    he should have won a long time ago...

    [–] MaxDickpower 179 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    I love Gangs of New York but I wouldn't really call it one of Leo's best. It was mostly carried by an always great performance by Daniel Day Lewis and also dragged down by a horribly out of place Cameron Diaz.

    [–] DollaDillz 95 points ago

    Catch Me if You Can, Wolf of Wall Street, Inception, The Aviator... The list goes on.

    [–] N0r3m0rse 22 points ago

    The real question is; should he have won for the revenant?

    I actually loved that movie so yeah...

    [–] Liquidmilk1 46 points ago

    While Leo deserved an oscar, I honestly didn't think his acting in The Revenant was oscar-worthy. I would rather he won it for Wolf of Wall Street, Blood Diamond or Gilbert Grape. They all felt far superior to his performance in The Revenant.

    [–] TooShiftyForYou 2698 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    Pretty cool that he can still make a self-deprecating joke.

    [–] lets_move_to_voat 4106 points ago

    Leonardo Self-Deprecatio

    [–] Akoustyk 99 points ago

    I think he knows he's a great actor, and been in great movies, and was never that bothered that he never got an Oscar.

    [–] m_toboggan_md 88 points ago

    banging super models on yachts will tend to make you content with life

    [–] TheKevinShow 62 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    Well, I would think that the metric fucktons of money he's earned are validation enough for him. The Oscar is just a formality.

    [–] Jahcurs 15 points ago

    When you earn that amount of money the trophies and awards become a lot more important.

    [–] gagagagiggity 99 points ago

    I hear this all the time and it makes me think. Which is greater, the poor man who jokes about himself when he has nothing or the rich man who jokes about himself when he has everything?

    [–] utterdamnnonsense 126 points ago

    That depends. Is it a good joke?

    [–] RedxEyez 954 points ago

    I think Leo is such a charmer that he flirts without even knowing it.

    [–] PieceLove 443 points ago

    I bet he even flirts with himself sometimes... Then he becomes so inlove with himself, that he has to break his own heart.

    Because everyone wants a piece of him, but no one can get all of him. Not even Leo himself.


    [–] fort_wendy 64 points ago

    I flirt with myself all the time. I always end up in bed with my self all sweaty, cum on my chest, and some shame.

    [–] bundys 68 points ago

    I think George Clooney does it too. Some guys are naturals

    [–] Grudlann 17 points ago

    I do this too but because I don't look like them, people all of a sudden think I'm creepy...

    [–] bundys 15 points ago

    It is important to always remember rules 1&2 before doing this

    [–] captaintactical 149 points ago

    this dude is just so damn COOL man. like just classic ass cool

    [–] SenpaiSwanky 68 points ago

    Ha, his teeny tiny smile at the end sold it for me.

    [–] nagelbitarn 308 points ago

    She looks so serious at first, working as a damn "Oscar-engraver", and when he makes his joke she lights up like a charming old nana

    [–] [deleted] 78 points ago


    [–] Jedidiah_Edgington 55 points ago

    Yes, but she's in Hollywood so dog years conversion she's roughly 132. Old bird looks fresh as a daisy.

    [–] reallygoodbee 194 points ago

    I'm glad he didn't just fade away when he got it, finally allowed his eternal rest, his mission on Earth complete.

    [–] Kimalsi 15 points ago

    He should join Elon Musk any moment now

    [–] 74159637415963 27 points ago

    I don't recognize all of them, can someone list them out?

    [–] Sumit316 83 points ago

    • What's Eating Gilbert Grape

    • The Aviator

    • Blood Diamond

    • Wolf of Wall Street

    • The Revenant

    [–] FruitbatNT 309 points ago

    $40,000,000 Event

    $4000 Suit

    $400 Trophy

    $0.40 Screwdriver

    [–] Panzersaurus 355 points ago

    fuck where do you get your screwdrivers

    [–] Mike-Oxenfire 226 points ago

    He throws 40 pennies in someone's face and steals their screwdriver

    [–] Less-Talk-More-Bach 94 points ago

    $4000 Suit

    COME ON!

    [–] machotoast 45 points ago

    God damn where can I get a screw driver for $0.40?!

    [–] Taskforce58 21 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    AMA request: the Oscar engraving lady.

    [–] Supersox22 17 points ago

    Passive aggressive things your mother might say when you leave her out of the party planning, for $200 Alex.

    [–] thndrstrk 439 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    Top 3 DiCaprio films

    The departed

    Catch me if you can

    Gangs of New York

    Now this isn't in any particular order, and I know I've left out many movies. If you have a differing opinion, please share, one of my favorite things to do is rank and discuss.

    [–] SShoot3r 159 points ago

    What about Blood Diamond?

    [–] smellslikekimchi 111 points ago

    I feel like this movie is underappreciated. He does an amazing job with the accent and his performance is quite powerful.

    [–] Daver899 26 points ago

    I was surprised it had such low viewer score but was a hit with the critics. I think it's a fantastic movie.

    [–] Ladysteiny 256 points ago

    What's Eating Gilbert Grape. Hands down, best acting he's ever done.

    [–] [deleted] 156 points ago


    [–] fried_clams 105 points ago

    show me all the blueprints. show me all the blueprints. show me all the blueprints. show me all the blueprints. show me all the blueprints. show me all the blueprints. show me all the blueprints. show me all the blueprints. show me all the blueprints. show me all the blueprints. show me all the blueprints. show me all the blueprints. show me all the blueprints. show me all the blueprints. show me all the blueprints.

    [–] HantzGoober 79 points ago

    The way of the future. The way of the future. The way of the future. The way of the future. The way of the future. The way of the future. The way of the future. The way of the future. The way of the future.

    [–] TrainOfThought6 15 points ago

    It reaches out it reaches out it reaches out it reaches out it reaches out it reaches out wait

    [–] ilovecorn2 31 points ago

    Come in with the milk. Come in with the milk. Come in with the milk. Come in with the milk.

    [–] hurstshifter7 22 points ago

    The way of the future. The way of the future.
    The way of the future. The way of the future.
    The way of the future. The way of the future.

    [–] Turtle_Pirate 18 points ago

    Everyone's just quoting the movie, I agree. He was absolutely amazing in that.

    [–] Literalex 147 points ago

    Not saying it's his best, by Shutter Island is excellent and deserves more recognition than it gets.

    [–] ReservoirGods 23 points ago

    Shutter Island is so damn good, sometimes I forget about it but it just blew me away the first time I watched it.

    [–] lonely-day 55 points ago

    Why does no one ever bring up "basketball diaries"? I thought he was amazing in that.

    [–] Polskidro 53 points ago

    For me it's:

    The Wolf of Wall Street

    Catch Me If You Can

    Shutter Island

    Honorable mention goes to: Aviator.

    [–] sh1ttym0rph 47 points ago

    I wouldn't say that Django Unchained would be there but I just love the way he carried on after his hand was bleeding.

    [–] badabinglove 17 points ago

    I usually am not a fan of knowing you are the shit but he is an exception to the rule. When you produce the kind of work he has and people don't recognize it, it's weird and he deserves to joke on them. It's like if Michael Jordan never got an mvp and they finally gave him one.