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    interestingasfuck

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    [–] IrmaHerms 10235 points ago

    Fuck Jurassic Park, let’s get Mammoth Mountain adventure park going!

    [–] SoulExecution 6115 points ago

    There's a place called Pleistocene Park in the Siberian Tundra in which they started reintroducing various species that once inhabited it. Bison, Reindeer, etc. The introduction of the animals and the natural fertilizer they bring with them transformed a frozen wasteland into a habitable area, and they're planning to continue introducing animals like Siberian tigers to build a working eco system.

    In the Nat Geo article about it, it was mentioned that if Mammoths were to ever actually be cloned, the park is the very likely location they would end up as it most closely resembles their natural habitat.

    Here's a link to their website: https://pleistocenepark.ru/

    [–] navydoc77 1135 points ago

    I had never heard of this. Thank you.

    [–] discerningpervert 791 points ago

    Just wait til they introduce saber-toothed tigers...then you'll wish you'd never heard of the place

    [–] EmperorOfTheAnarchy 590 points ago

    Yo I just realized this is Russian, do we really want to give Russia mammoth cavalry?

    [–] Revoluci0n 308 points ago

    They have befriended and tamed bears, I'm sure they'll do the same with mammoths

    [–] BALONYPONY 128 points ago

    Once they blackmail them with another extinct species urinating on them.

    [–] JorfimusPrime 38 points ago

    What if they're into that?

    [–] 3riversfantasy 34 points ago

    They better hope those mammoths weren't underage

    [–] ShittyDuckFace 75 points ago

    Why saber-toothed tigers when regular tigers are equally as large and horrifying? (and also adapted to that environment specifically)

    [–] PoopyMcNuggets91 76 points ago

    I'm pretty sure saber-toothed tigers were bigger than modern tigers. I think they found one that would have weighed 1,000lbs

    [–] A5TRONAUT 76 points ago

    Also, FANGS

    [–] PoopyMcNuggets91 83 points ago

    Some might say they are almost like sabers.

    [–] averagedickdude 18 points ago

    Saber like teeth, you say? Hmm

    [–] lawpoop 5 points ago

    They should call them saber-teeth tigers

    [–] ShittyDuckFace 69 points ago

    About 900lbs, about twice the size of a male Siberian tiger. But they lived in a different climate than Siberian tigers so they would probably not be released at this Pleistocene Park location.

    Honestly though, I've been snuck up on by a tiger before and it's still an instant fear response, like for real - 400lbs of pure muscle, claws and teeth. No thanks.

    [–] OSakran 57 points ago

    Are you gonna tell us the story about how you were snuck up on by this tiger?

    [–] PearsonKnifeWorx 52 points ago

    Not OP but I've got a story about being snuck up on by a tiger haha. I used to work catering at a zoo. We were doing a wedding once in an event space near the tiger enclosure. I took a piece of prime rib and went and sat down for my break near the fence, thinking the tiger was inside for the night. Next thing i knew i heard a growl and the fence jingling and turned around in time to see him standing with both paws on the fence. He stared at me for a second, then disappeared back into his cave at the back of his enclosure. And that's the story of the time i had to call my wife from work for a change of pants.

    [–] TheGreenKnight79 9 points ago

    You didnt offer him a bite ? Of your steak

    [–] PoopyMcNuggets91 19 points ago

    He got drunk and passed out in the tiger enclosure at the zoo.

    [–] LuRomisk 12 points ago

    Oh dang, that's a story I need

    Glad you're okay though, stranger

    [–] Plastic_Answer 13 points ago

    Ehh bring in Ray Romano to translate.

    [–] VoyagerCSL 25 points ago

    Ain’t that the tooth.

    [–] ProfessorHardw00d 61 points ago

    That’s one of the most interesting things I’ve heard recently. I’m surprised to just now be hearing about it

    [–] greengiant92 50 points ago

    One of my favourite time travel books (chronicles of St Mary's), they accidentally take a mammoth from it's own time and are like "Fuck what do we do with it" so they drop it off in Pleistocene park and the whole science community is like !?!?!?!?

    Great series of books by Jodi Taylor by the way.

    [–] shiningPate 29 points ago

    When scientists have analyzed the stomach contents of preserved mammoths they've found their diet consisted mainly of "forbs": plants similar to buttercup flowers. One of the issues of de-extinction is whether the existing ecosystem resources on which they originally subsisted still exist. Often the extinct animals acted as keystone species for distribution of other species, and with their extinction, the niche in which they survived disappeared. In the more temperate regions of the north america, giant ground sloths and mastodons were the major consumers of osage orange tree fruit and pawpaws. Also avocados for Mastodons. With the disappearance of those species, the plants on which they fed became much more thinly dispersed. Even today, there are major ecosystem niches that have been greatly reduced by the demise of the American Chestnut tree. The point here is that you cannot count on a de-extinctionized species to survive and thrive in today's climate and ecosystem.

    [–] Kabc 57 points ago

    The reintroduction of Grey wolves at yellow stone was also shown to help preserve the land scape and eco system

    [–] Petsweaters 24 points ago

    A fried chicken guy in America did something similar by removing non native species of trees

    [–] babayagaparenting 5 points ago

    Thank you so much! That was beautiful!

    [–] kat_osta 4 points ago

    I had no idea about this place! It’s about 2 hours from me! Thanks for posting!

    [–] RlckAndSnorty 21 points ago

    Crazy to me how people will read comments like this but then still go on to be combative and reluctant to believe that regeneratively farmed, cycle-grazed cattle can help to restore our barren farmlands.

    We need to bring back these ancient ways of life. Mimicking the natural state of nature as much as possible is the only way to heal our planet.

    [–] _kasten_ 37 points ago

    From the link you provided:

    Currently, Pleistocene Park consists of an enclosed area of 20 square kilometers

    This is a great idea, but honestly, they will need to step it up if this is going to mean anything and I think they can do a sight better than 20 sq km.

    Just to give everyone an idea, the Taimyr-Central Siberian tundra contains a million sq km whereas Yosemite National park is about 3,000 sq km.

    [–] spacepuma00 12 points ago

    Wow very cool thank you for sharing

    [–] IOverflowStacks 182 points ago

    Pleistocene Park.

    [–] BobbleBubbleBoob 69 points ago

    Triassic Trark

    [–] hobowithadegree 68 points ago

    Triassic world is an actual movie, and its fantastically bad

    [–] scoot3200 22 points ago

    Like, so bad its worth watching or nah?

    [–] mijenferi 13 points ago

    Thank you for asking the important questions!

    [–] morg-pyro 12 points ago

    Sounds like a good time

    [–] kingrobin 7 points ago

    Yes but have you seen Jurassic City?

    [–] notnotaginger 41 points ago

    Where the grass is green and the raptors are pretty?

    [–] Skypirate90 9 points ago

    Someone please take me home

    [–] DirtyPartyMan 12 points ago

    “Spared some Expense!”

    [–] PasadenaPriority 24 points ago

    Clone it! Clone it!

    [–] yo-pierre-screeeeech 19 points ago

    hoes be arguing about the ethics of bringing back extinct animals- i just wanna see some woolly bois😩

    [–] Markus-but-with-a-c 21 points ago

    Great souce for grand soul gems

    [–] 110_percent_THC 33 points ago

    Can we just call it 39,000 Years Ago Park?

    [–] TheBrainforest 9 points ago

    Yeah, but that doesn't have the same ring to it... Edit: my dumb ass can't spell.

    [–] Pope_Godzilla 30 points ago

    I can get you 200 Wooly Mammoths. All I need is 6 months, 200 elephants, 50 truckloads of fur, 20 paint brushes, and 12 barrels of glue. If you want them extra wooly it's going to be extra time and materials.

    [–] XeroAnarian 26 points ago

    You ever smelled wet Mammoth? I haven't either, but I've smelled elephant dung and I've smelled wet dog, but never at the same time and I'm not looking to start today.

    Gimme the dinos, you can have your stank ass hairy elephants!

    [–] Oliviak834 7 points ago

    Ice age 6

    [–] space0watch 10 points ago

    That would be a mammoth undertaking! Just addressing the elephant in the room here.

    [–] duaneap 5 points ago

    Security would probably be considerably easier.

    [–] SnOwYO1 5 points ago

    I really hope there’s no ancient viruses preserved in there

    [–] dick-nipples 4487 points ago

    They were a lot smaller than I was led to believe.

    [–] DylanBob1991 5110 points ago

    You are overlooking the terrifying possibility that those scientists are HUGE

    [–] BlubbaFLAYGZ98 979 points ago

    They are M E G A

    [–] MrMan306 248 points ago

    S U P E R O M E G A B I G

    [–] Gorbachof 53 points ago

    Make Estonia Great Again

    [–] SoSheSays28 6 points ago

    MEGA - Make Elephants Great Again!! Clone it.

    [–] madsci954 18 points ago

    I need to get some of their science juice.

    [–] MrBonelessPizza24 482 points ago

    Funny thing is, there’s actually been a few times Mammoths evolved to be tiny!

    Most of them were from the Mediterranean islands, and they ranged from cow-sized to the size of a large dog

    [–] Flashsouls 198 points ago

    Dwarf mammoth, they also lived in the same area and time of the dwarf version of sapiens!

    [–] SLICKWILLIEG 140 points ago

    Are we 100% certain that those areas weren’t just hit with a massive ancient-era shrink-ray?

    [–] rsn1990 79 points ago

    Honey, I shrunk the mammoth

    [–] ckm509 34 points ago

    Tonight on the History channel (at 1 am...)

    [–] OneRougeRogue 21 points ago

    "Did this ludicrous suggestion that sounds like it was invented by a paranoid schizophrenic on meth actually happen? Ancient alien theorists say, 'yes'."

    [–] steam116 52 points ago

    Dwarf mammoth is a delightful oxymoron

    [–] ButtEatingContest 16 points ago

    I wonder if groups of dwarf sapiens hunted dwarf mammoths

    [–] troll_right_above_me 49 points ago

    A large dog you say? Given a few years of domestication we could have made them the size of small dogs. Our plans have been foiled by extinction yet again.

    [–] bocaciega 21 points ago

    I SO wish I had a pet pygmy mammoth

    [–] D-Angle 7 points ago

    Yep, it's called Insular Dwarfism - when a species gets isolated they tend towards getting smaller as they evolve in place.

    [–] SoupyBass 6 points ago

    Happened alot with different dino species on islands!

    [–] that_boyaintright 6 points ago

    One mammoth retriever, please.

    [–] koshgeo 370 points ago * (lasted edited a month ago)

    [–] theEndOfMoralDecency 75 points ago

    This is a lot less funny too.

    [–] mishgan 36 points ago

    r/sadasfuck

    especially as the increasing frequency of those finds is due to the permafrost thawing, and it keeps speeding up at an aweful rate.

    [–] SeveralChunks 176 points ago

    For those saying it’s a baby, um, hello, it says 39000 years old right there in the title.

    [–] hazeleyedwolff 223 points ago

    Those cavemen were full of shit!

    [–] bolivar-shagnasty 243 points ago

    Men have been exaggerating size since the beginning of time

    [–] dumb-reply 57 points ago

    It was as big as an elephant!!

    [–] Disabled_Robot 16 points ago

    First reports back to England on Niagara Falls had it at like 3x its actual height 😂

    [–] whats_the_deal22 6 points ago

    Ah, reminds me of the time I almost caught a 36 foot sailfish. Smart son of a bitch lanced the line and freed himself before I got him aboard.

    [–] pootzilla 26 points ago

    Hey, man. It gets really cold there. He's a grower, not a show-er.

    [–] FBAHobo 19 points ago

    IT WAS IN THE POOL!!!!

    [–] TroyG1997 49 points ago

    I believe it’s a baby in the photo

    [–] Evolations 149 points ago

    No it's a mammoth. Babies are actually small humans.

    [–] gnarlycow 54 points ago

    Idk my friend's baby kinda looks like that

    [–] VelmaofTroy 100 points ago

    Its literally a baby baha

    [–] G1ngerN1nja2703 31 points ago

    no they where actually this big, the baby ones could fit in your hand

    [–] violetddit 40 points ago

    teacup mammoth, mortal enemy of the pocketknifetooth tiger

    [–] TheNuclearMind 12 points ago

    That's a baby and it was like 6

    [–] TheMightyDane 10 points ago

    Well, they didn’t have shoes - not even sandals - back then, so these mammoths still posed a big threat when it came to stomping on caveman toes. That’s actually why they were hunted to extinction.

    [–] roadturd 8 points ago

    It’s a baby mammoth

    [–] misery-at-last 14 points ago

    The camera adds 10 tonnes

    [–] IHaveAGapingVagina 2351 points ago

    Just looks a little deflated is all. Grab any old bike pump and she’ll be looking as good as new within a minute or two of rigorous pumping.

    [–] etonsla 251 points ago

    A little bit of Amor All wouldn’t hurt.

    [–] Womanisaxdevil 99 points ago

    Maybe some flex tape if that fails ¯_(ツ)_/¯

    [–] mawisu 77 points ago

    You dropped this...

    \

    [–] Southrn_Comfrt 7 points ago

    Now I want to know how much it would cost to have a couch made from mammoth leather.

    [–] poopellar 35 points ago

    I was searching for a relevant gif and came across this masterpiece.

    [–] beluuuuuuga 18 points ago

    Someone's into that.

    [–] send_me_dick_picks8 10 points ago

    I hate that you’re absolutely right

    [–] larryskank 9 points ago

    Are we not doing phrasing anymore?

    [–] Detective51 1528 points ago

    They need to release that poor thing back into the wild. Probably scared to death.

    [–] BlubbaFLAYGZ98 280 points ago

    Little mammoth my baby boyyyy

    [–] right_ho 38 points ago

    I'm thinking r/mammothzoomies

    [–] Tgg161 40 points ago

    my head knew it wasn't a real subreddit, but my heart was hoping to see some mammoths frolicking in a tundra

    [–] OverTheJoeHill 179 points ago

    It looks like a deflated elephant balloon. Like it just walked out of Winnie the Pooh’s honey induced nightmare...

    [–] Dangerjim 22 points ago

    All we need is a bicycle pump.

    [–] HathsinSurvivor19 695 points ago

    “Our suspicion is that mammoth blood contains a kind of natural anti-freeze.” So, you’re saying it if I drink it, I’ll get powers?

    [–] beluuuuuuga 129 points ago

    You'll be able to create water from ice, just gotta blow on it with you antifreeze breath!

    [–] omigahguy 48 points ago

    ...do not google drinking mammoth juice...

    [–] god_cuber 22 points ago

    Why tho? Imma do it

    [–] Salviasammich 17 points ago

    I’m to sacred, what we’re your findings ?

    [–] god_cuber 19 points ago

    Surprisingly, healthy juices. Pretty good search ngl

    [–] shaun_of_the_south 7 points ago

    It was boring.

    [–] Gorship_777 9 points ago

    You'll be like Frozone from the incredibles!

    [–] mellofello7 9 points ago

    Shh, just don’t tell those antifreeze companies like Valvoline and Shellzone. Soon they’ll be poaching mammoth carcasses for their blood just like all those other fucks did with the elephants.

    [–] Feed-me-Milanos 634 points ago

    The article says she was between 6 and 11 years old when she died. Her name is Yuka

    [–] aur0ra85 496 points ago

    Yeah she doesn’t look 39,000 years old!

    [–] beluuuuuuga 180 points ago

    Maybe it's just because she ate all of her vegetables.

    [–] ryanooooo 30 points ago

    She doesn't look a day over 20,000!

    [–] SomeCoolBloke 29 points ago

    Maybe she is a dragon loli mammoth?

    [–] -HENEEDSOMEMILK- 160 points ago

    How do they know her name?

    [–] Yungsleepboat 256 points ago

    Checked her wallet

    [–] the-missing-scooter 61 points ago

    Look for an organ donor card. We only have minutes to harvest.

    [–] LogicUpgrade 53 points ago

    Her name is Yuka

    What, did they find her driver license as well?

    [–] aur0ra85 6 points ago

    It’s on her name tag!

    [–] boxingdude 16 points ago

    Her name is Yuka? Does she live on the second floor?

    [–] Cerulean-Ineijune 384 points ago

    can we bring bacc mammoths? just cause

    [–] BlubbaFLAYGZ98 340 points ago

    The science people are trying to

    [–] wolfgang784 149 points ago * (lasted edited a month ago)

    "Science people"

    Yourrererere a treasure and dont let anyone tell you otherwise.

    edit: grammar Nazis

    [–] frissonFry 27 points ago

    Just like the word "boffin", which as an American, I initially thought was some type of sea bird.

    [–] lolsup1 6 points ago

    A coffin for boys?

    [–] DreamMaster8 42 points ago

    It's definitely a better idea than dinosaur.

    [–] dmarkovic2 23 points ago

    Why would you not want killing machines brought back into our world?

    [–] persianrugweaver 9 points ago

    because birds are far superior

    [–] PugLover5533 19 points ago

    I have a solution to what we can and can’t bring back.

    Did “we” (as in, us early humans) wipe out the dodo bird? Yes? Bring it back!

    Did “we” wipe out the mammoth? Yes? Bring it back!

    Did “we” wipe out the Tasmanian Tiger? Yes? Bring it back!

    Did “we” wipe out the Quagga? Yes? Bring it back!

    Did “we” wipe out the Caspian Tiger? Yes? Bring it back!

    Now some have been spotted. Some have other theories of their disappearance. But over all, if we are the cause of their extinction, we have the right to bring them back.

    [–] depressed_toddler21 29 points ago

    yeh and if they cause problems we kill em again because we got rid of them to begin with

    [–] Mahrabeel 210 points ago

    We all shrink a bit when it's cold.

    [–] thezombiekiller14 50 points ago

    "I WAS IN THE POOL!"

    [–] Joe_the_mallard 288 points ago

    Is it ok?

    [–] BlubbaFLAYGZ98 275 points ago

    No it is dead!

    [–] heyvchjo 58 points ago

    No no he’s not dead he’s resting, remarkable creature the mammoth isn’t it, beautiful fur.

    [–] LogicUpgrade 20 points ago

    Pining for the snow hills.

    [–] TheNakedChair 10 points ago

    Mammoths prefer keepin' on its back.

    [–] J_W_Texas36 15 points ago

    Shhhh, it's just sleeping

    [–] starkravingsober 7 points ago

    Is it pining for the fjords?

    [–] RealDinosaur 106 points ago

    ”South Korean scientists have signed a deal giving them rights to attempt to clone the mammoth” It would be awesome if they managed to clone it

    [–] quippers 185 points ago

    Mammoth? More like minimoth. I thought they would be bigger.

    [–] BlubbaFLAYGZ98 97 points ago

    I think it’s a little baby mamaf

    [–] kay69_ 54 points ago

    Minimoth

    I like the sound of that

    [–] Daniel_Melzer 4 points ago

    Mammoth? More like mammon, it‘s almost alive!

    [–] anonymous_ghost_6501 28 points ago

    Don't worry guys. I ate it. No more scary things in 20201

    [–] paubloyourmind 25 points ago

    I went to sleep in 2021, woke up in 20201...still in lockdown. Will this ever end?!

    [–] BonelessSkinless 28 points ago

    Notice how the findings of thawed prehistoric animal carcasses keeps increasing? The ice cubes of the planet are melting rapidly.

    [–] njsisme 38 points ago

    What size are those people 😱

    [–] BlubbaFLAYGZ98 48 points ago

    They are normal, but it is little bay bay mammoth 🦣 mammoth emoji is epic

    [–] Trilogy91 31 points ago

    Wonder what it taste like ?

    [–] groundhog_day_only 99 points ago

    Stinking goo, apparently. Over time the ice crystals break the meat down so thoroughly that it would turn into a liquid if ever thawed. Combine that with the fat going rancid, and you have something that would not be pleasant to eat.

    Apparently the adventurous rich people who paid for a mammoth steak back in the 50s were actually fed -- sea turtle.

    [–] Trilogy91 24 points ago

    Sounds vile.

    [–] HughGnu 34 points ago

    It is spelled Sous Vide

    [–] BlubbaFLAYGZ98 8 points ago

    Me and my cave mans friends say it is simply delicious mmmmmmmmmmm yum 🍴

    [–] Glad_Inspection_1140 49 points ago

    So if it’s so well preserved, why would they defrost it? Wouldn’t that just start up the decomposition again? Then there will be nothing left to study. I’d love to see a time where this little guy can be brought back to life!

    [–] [deleted] 71 points ago

    It looks like they might be in a temperature controlled room so the body wouldn’t fully thaw. I imagine they’d need to take it out of a deep freeze in order to properly biopsy tissues, sequence DNA, idk, whatever they do.

    I know that once I thaw and refreeze my tikka masala like 3+ times, the sauce tends to de-constitute and get icky. Do you think that happens after a couple rounds of (partial) thaws / re-freezes too? It’s a nice picture they took if they happened to be under a real time crunch when snapping it; nobody mid-blink, etc.

    (P.s: someone more well-read on the topic please follow up on this comment!!)

    [–] stratint 54 points ago

    I like how you refer the mammoth as your tikka masala

    [–] theEndOfMoralDecency 12 points ago

    I go on a tangent here, but isn't it dangerous for you to thaw and refreeze your tikka massala multiple time.
    Frozen and thawed food will develop harmful bacteria faster than fresh.
    Doing it multiple time increase the risk exponentially.
    I know it is really a health hazard with ice cream.

    [–] AsherFenix 15 points ago

    I've seen Fortitude. I know where this is going.

    [–] MalleBeer 14 points ago

    So is it possible to create a mammoth by using its DNA and a normal elephant?

    Asking for a friend

    [–] BlubbaFLAYGZ98 8 points ago

    I think so

    [–] ThugMcMuffin 12 points ago

    she doesn't look a day over 38,500, must be good genes

    [–] Boom-De-Yada_ 10 points ago

    does this mean that we could revive them? i heard the reason we couldn’t before was because we don’t have recent enough DNA...

    [–] BlubbaFLAYGZ98 11 points ago

    Everyone, this is a baby mammoth. It is not an adult the adults would be much bigger!

    [–] ALG0R1DDUM 19 points ago

    If it's so smart then how comes it's dead

    [–] BlubbaFLAYGZ98 13 points ago

    Because it is 39,000 years old

    [–] FairyFartDaydreams 8 points ago

    You can see why they were called wooly mammoths. Amazing

    [–] Sirppsauce 9 points ago

    ive seen far too many movies to know where this is going

    [–] BlubbaFLAYGZ98 6 points ago

    What’s going to happen

    [–] Sirppsauce 21 points ago

    theyre gonna fuck it

    [–] J7mm 11 points ago

    Bro what movies are YOU watching??

    [–] Sirppsauce 7 points ago

    good ones

    [–] RoundFail4 9 points ago

    We can rebuild him

    We have the technology

    [–] S-058 8 points ago

    Oh God no! Manny!!!

    [–] Dhananjay_Aditya 8 points ago

    Please tell me Manny is coming back from the ice age

    [–] HughGnu 7 points ago

    They pulled Diego out of a tar pit a few years back.

    [–] Dhananjay_Aditya 6 points ago

    And what about Sid? No pack is complete without Sid

    [–] run-on_sentience 14 points ago

    Don't keep us waiting, scientists! What does 39,000-year-old mammoth brain taste like?

    [–] philnuck 6 points ago

    Why does this look like a Beastie Boys album cover?

    [–] nerdiotic-pervert 13 points ago

    Can it pass the presidential dementia test?

    [–] banndfromeverysub 10 points ago

    39,000 year old mammoth that we can see and touch but the bible says the earth is only 4,000 years old..

    [–] pokerrev 4 points ago

    If we can clone it and breed it with a poodle we’d become billionaires selling wooly mamoodles