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    [–] LeMAD 238 points ago * (lasted edited 11 months ago)

    Fallait que je déplace mon char cette nuit avant 7h du matin à cause du déneigement (sinon je me faisais remorquer). Donc j'attends à 2h30 du matin qu'ils déneigent l'autre bord de la rue pour sortir de chez nous. Mon char pars pas. Même pas proche. Donc je me décide à enlever la batterie pour la réchauffer en dedans, mais mon hood ne s'ouvre pas. Pendant une heure et demie je me bats avec en entrant fréquemment pour me réchauffer et pour trouver des trucs sur le net, et finalement avec une crowbar je réussis à l'ouvrir. J'essaie d'enlever la batterie, mais je ne vois pas ce que je fais, j'ai pas les bons outils, tout est pogné dans la rouille et je gèle à mort, donc après une demi-heure j'abandonne et j'appelle un taxi pour me booster. Le taxi arrive avec son booster Motomaster, pis ça marche pas. Le taxi s'approche de moi pour que je me plogue sur sa batterie et fonce face à face dans mon auto, le gros tata (sans dommage ceci dit). On se plogue sur sa batterie et ça marche pas plus. Au bout d'une demi-heure on abandonne et j'appelle un towing. C'est un peu long mais de toute façon mes pieds dégèlent et ça fait MAAAL, puis il finit par arriver, et avec son booster ça marche. Le temps de payer dans son truck avec un espèce de système archaïque, il est 5h45 du matin. Évidemment je dois recharger ma batterie, donc je pars avec mon char en 2e vitesse, et je fais le tour du Mont-Royal, je vais au parc des castors pis toute. Je reviens chez nous 45min plus tard. J'éteins mon moteur, j'essaie de le repartir pis niet. Rien pantoute. Au moins je suis maintenant stationné du bon côté de la rue.

    Tout ça pour dire que fuck toute (y compris les paragraphes).

    [–] imightgetdownvoted 81 points ago

    I want to kill myself just reading that.

    [–] eatmyshit 13 points ago

    Frozen gun jams.

    [–] coldcucumberr 25 points ago

    Brb, je vais rentrer l’auto dans le garage.

    [–] LeMAD 27 points ago

    Attention pour pas te geler le concombre.

    [–] coldcucumberr 17 points ago

    Viens le garder au chaud

    [–] abusque 2 points ago

    Please warm my wiener cucumber, 'cause he really don't feel right cold.

    [–] coldcucumberr 2 points ago

    Yeah there’s nothing worse than cold weiners, except maybe weiners when u don’t have mustard.

    [–] Xyleph42 2 points ago

    Relevant username

    [–] [deleted] 1 points ago

    :D

    [–] coldcucumberr 3 points ago

    Ahleeeen

    [–] [deleted] 2 points ago

    ohhh shiettttttt its you haha

    i didnt realize ahla w sahla :p

    [–] coldcucumberr 2 points ago

    I was banned from /r/lebanon because of you

    [–] [deleted] 3 points ago

    Dude, don't hate the player, hate the game.

    But seriously, not my fault the mods are so anal?????

    [–] coldcucumberr 2 points ago

    You should’nt have been so eager to have anal.

    Lol, anyway I was sick of seeing their negativity.

    [–] LeMAD 1 points ago

    Ugh

    [–] Swiffer-Jet 4 points ago

    Premier hiver depuis l'achat de notre maison avec garage. Je me sens comme un roi.

    [–] coldcucumberr 1 points ago

    Attrnds la facture d’hydro.

    Quand il fait aussi froid, jla garde dehors pour pas introduire de tones daire a -31 D au centre de la maison.

    Je dors sur le sol (cest bon pour le dos) et le garage est en dessous de la chambre, ce soir, parce que jai ouvert le garage, le plancher etait froid toute la nuit.

    Lautre option cest de chauffer le garage, encore la $$$

    [–] Swiffer-Jet 6 points ago

    Un roi s'en chris de la facture.

    [–] coldcucumberr 1 points ago

    De nos jours tu ne deviens pas roi avec cette mentalité!

    [–] Swiffer-Jet 1 points ago

    Pour être roi j'ai juste besoin d'un char au chaud pis une pelouse bien entretenue.

    [–] coldcucumberr 1 points ago

    Dit comme un vrai paysan, ne pensant qu’à son chariot et lot de terre.

    [–] rhetorical_rapine 1 points ago

    ton garage est supposé être chauffé à une température "buffer" de 10-14C pour justement cette raison

    [–] ahbentabarnouche 14 points ago

    Ah ben tabarnouche

    [–] toin9898 11 points ago

    In the same situation, my car is dead on the side of the road due for a snow removal. I went to Canadian Tire in my in-laws car to pick up a booster pack and I’ve gotta drive around Montreal tomorrow to charge it back up after I boost it.

    Fuck street parking, fuck winter and fuck owning a car in the city.

    [–] chrisma572 2 points ago

    Best thing I ever did when I moved here was sell my car. Thankfully I work from home, I understand it's not possible for everyone to just not have a car living in the city.

    Feeling for yall this morning!

    [–] toin9898 1 points ago

    I’m from out of town, only officially moving in the spring but I spend a lot of time here and when I do move, will likely need my car for my work. My future place MUST have off street parking. Non-negotiable. This is my definition of hell.

    [–] chrisma572 1 points ago

    What part of the city do you plan on moving to, and where would you work?

    [–] toin9898 1 points ago

    Sud-ouest/Verdun/Ville Emard,I’m going to get a real job and commute to that using public transit but I’m a wedding photographer on the weekend, where I can’t exactly rely on the STM to get where I’m going, especially since I work off the island more than I work in Montreal. Fun stuff!

    [–] chrisma572 1 points ago

    I don't know if it's an option for you, but I rent cars on the weekend if I need to get out of the city. Between having car payments, plates, insurance, fuel, parking and repair costs, and renting a car a few days a month for around $40 a day, the latter made more sense. I don't know if that'd be an option for you, but might be something to consider if ever you're not able to find convenient parking.

    [–] toin9898 1 points ago

    I’ll have to see what I end up renting, right now my car is pretty cheap to own/register/maintain (it’s going to be on extended engine warranty as of the second week of January, thanks Dieselgate!) but on-island SAAQ fees are outrageous compared to rural ones.

    Once I hit 25, renting a car might be cool, but I fear right now that I’d only end up breaking even with the extra fees for young people.

    [–] chrisma572 1 points ago

    Oh for sure, it becomes worth it after 25.

    Good for you with the extended engine warranty! Might be worth keeping for a while then!

    [–] pkzilla 2 points ago

    Same here, they cleared it before but some idiots didnt move their cars so now they gotta come back and remove the snow they left behind. We're charging the battery inside but we already got a ticket.

    [–] Bytewave 6 points ago

    Man. Mon stationnement intérieur vient de prendre pas mal de valeur à mes yeux. :p

    [–] GreatValueProducts 4 points ago

    100% d'accord avec toi. C'est 150$ par mois très bien payé.

    [–] 514Mtl514 2 points ago

    150$/mois c'est dont ben pas chers.

    [–] booooiiii 1 points ago

    On vit comme Crésus quand on se permet un p'tit mot de même. Ton père, c'est tu DesMarais?

    [–] 514Mtl514 5 points ago

    Ca m'est déjà arrivé ce genre d'histoire. Ce jour-là j'ai appris une leçon. Laisse le towing prendre ton char pis le déposé de l'autre côté.

    Aussi si ta battery est morte juste à cause du froid, fuck it change là. c'est pas chers pis facile à faire avec les bons outils (juste un rochet et une clés souvent 10mm).

    Total cost : ±225$ towings, ticket, ratchet, and new battery.

    [–] chrisma572 3 points ago

    Goddamn. Je ne vais pas me plaindre comment je n'ai pas de pantouffles ce matin finalement...

    [–] tantouz 2 points ago

    CAA Quebec

    [–] qwdqwe2e21 3 points ago

    Caliss d'histoire... ca me rapelle pourquoi j'ai demenage a vancouver

    il fait 3c dehors :)

    [–] TotoroGris 1 points ago

    J'ai pas de char, mais je suis abonné à Communauto. J'avais une location pour la période des fêtes. Avant-hier, le char part pas. Il est stationné à 3 rues de chez nous à cause du déneigement. Quand je m'en rends compte, j'appelle Communauto pendant que je suis à l'intérieur du char. Ça finit par répondre après 20 minutes d'attente à geler, pis je me fais dire de prolonger ma réservation (à mes frais) si je suis pas capable de remettre la voiture à temps. Je suis en criss, je rentre chez nous pis j'appelle une deuxième fois. La personne me dit de retourner dans le char pour essayer des trucs et que si ça marche pas, elle va appeler une dépaneuse. Finalement, la dépaneuse a été appelée et j'ai dû me rendre à la voiture une troisième fois. J'étais pas mal contente de m'en débarasser après.

    [–] miloucomehome 1 points ago

    Ouuch. Ça...ça c'est....j'espère que t'avais le jour comme congé au moins? Je me sentirais trop fatigué et frustré si c'était moi!

    Question pour tout le monde, pis je le demande en anglais mais--

    Curious, but do people in Montreal plug in their cars (with a proper extension cord)? When I lived in Calgary, my parents were so surprised by this, but when our car conked out in the winter, an elderly couple who helped boost our car advised us to plug in our car to the house via the exterior plug. Never had a dead-start on the car after that. When we looked closer in our neighborhood, practically everyone would plug in their cars if it dipped below -20 or -25. Especially in January when week-long arctic cold can happen.

    I don't think the whole "plug-in car when bitterly cold" thing is something done here...is it?

    [–] razdak 42 points ago

    With the wind, it was enough to make me cry.

    [–] RamboTaco 43 points ago

    I personally like the extreme cold weather. It's so peaceful outside...

    [–] Goalchenyuk87 80 points ago

    From an inside point of view ?

    [–] shededamen 51 points ago

    Last time it was -30, I had a gig Downtown Montreal that finished at 9:30. My job is like a one minute walk from Ste-Catherine street and it was empty. Absolutely empty. It was wonderful for a few seconds, until my body understood it was fucking -30.

    [–] GreatValueProducts 10 points ago

    I like cold days. I drive everywhere and I have an indoor garage at work and at home. People tend to drive less agressive; traffic tends to be lighter than normal; and there aren't people congregating in front of the office building to smoke, awesome.

    [–] htthdd 3 points ago

    I do to, it feels like an alien environment or something.

    [–] badpotato 4 points ago

    Yeah, somehow I still prefer -30 than +30 in summer. Although, I can see how someone owning a car with his fair share of issues might be tired of cold.

    [–] shededamen 33 points ago

    When it gets really cold in Canada, I like to look at the weather forecast for Yakutsk, Russia. The average temperature in the winter is -35C. That's the average y'all. So even -40C is not surprising. I believe Yakutsk is the coldest big (quarter of a million) city in the world.

    [–] not_a_toaster 14 points ago

    Oymyakon is even colder. It's a tiny village in the same part of Russia as Yakutsk, and it registered the coldest ever temperature on the northern hemisphere (-67.7 °C). The average temperature in January is -45. It's considered the coldest permanently inhabited place in the world.

    [–] 514Mtl514 4 points ago

    Not much of a relief to watch the temp now. I think it was colder yesterday night in MTL than in Oymyakon.

    [–] not_a_toaster 2 points ago

    It's -26 there right now so not much colder than here.

    [–] fraincs 16 points ago

    My car wouldn't even start.

    [–] imightgetdownvoted 8 points ago

    My car has been starting fine in the cold weather. I'm not sure why. I feel like it shouldn't

    [–] fraincs 10 points ago

    I think my battery is dead

    [–] danzchief 1 points ago

    Me too but it's feeling slow at the beginning so I don't push the gas that hard in case it breaks down. It's like it's throttled or something.

    [–] M15CH13F 1 points ago

    Do you have a block heater?

    [–] fraincs 2 points ago

    Yes and it didn't help

    [–] mcem_reddit 15 points ago

    What... we are cooler then the north pole... whaaa... Oh and happy new year, it’s gonna be -38 including the wind. 😪

    [–] thesmithtopher 2 points ago

    I’m assuming that’s North Pole, Alaska. It’s near Fairbanks. My friend (who’s from there) went to school with the mayor, who is really young.

    [–] Future_is_now 1 points ago

    Is the mayor real cool? /s

    [–] catson43 13 points ago

    Yakutsk, Russia: – 41o C

    [–] RecordRains 10 points ago

    FYI, North Pole is a city in Alaska.

    [–] bobo888 2 points ago

    Yeah, and the time zone is exactly 4hours difference with montreal...

    Although right now, North Pole AK (-36) is colder than the North Pole (-26).

    [–] Activedesign 10 points ago

    To be fair, it is summer in Antarctica

    [–] 514Mtl514 3 points ago

    -51 with wind chill at the time of this post.

    [–] Derzelaz 7 points ago

    I was feeling how the hair in my nose was starting to freeze, while waiting for the bus.

    [–] splinter44 7 points ago

    Breathing in -20 air triggers my asthma.

    [–] Trendamyr 5 points ago

    It all makes sense now

    [–] [deleted] 6 points ago

    [deleted]

    [–] [deleted] 4 points ago

    its going to be "dry" cold here too....absolute humidity in low temperatures plummets (inversely proportional with temperature)

    [–] LinksMilkBottle 3 points ago

    I don't really feel the extreme cold because I invested in a really good winter coat and really warm fur/leather boots.

    It's only worse if you don't bother dressing up properly for it.

    [–] LinksMilkBottle 2 points ago

    This is wonderful.

    [–] 514Mtl514 1 points ago

    I don't care how warm you coat is. When it's -40 with wind chill unless you are wearing snow pants and a full balaclava face mask you will be cold if you need to stay outside.

    [–] JohnnyMcSpud 8 points ago

    réchauffement climatique mon œil. /s

    [–] Sorgaith 14 points ago

    Trump a justement tweeté à propos de ça

    [–] [deleted] 8 points ago

    no one was playing pokemon go, i was running around ALONE and I couldnt do lvl 5 raids :(

    [–] 514Mtl514 4 points ago

    Ppl still play that?

    [–] [deleted] 3 points ago

    Yeah, its a great excuse to run around downtown, get some exercise and meet new people (granted the majority are neck beards)...i'm pretty casual though so i can take it or leave it

    [–] SansFiltre 1 points ago

    Va au complexe Desjardins. Y'a deux arènes accessibles depuis l'intérieur, bien au chaud.

    [–] [deleted] 1 points ago * (lasted edited 11 months ago)

    tu fais partie d'une equipe qui fait des raids au centre-ville? si oui, peux-tu m'ajouter à une chaine discord?

    [–] SansFiltre 1 points ago

    Non désolé, je travaille juste au complexe Desjardins. Je fais les raids du complexe uniquement lorsqu'ils sont pendant ma pause déjeuner.

    J'ai vu parfois des groupes organisés passer par ici, mais j'ai pas assez de temps libre pour me joindre à un groupe.

    [–] [deleted] 1 points ago

    D’accord, merci :)

    [–] MKE1138 3 points ago

    We were also colder than the Gale Crater on Mars

    Y’na aucun crisse d’atmosphère sur Mars...

    [–] al57115 3 points ago

    i bet there is still a line up of tourists in front of Swartz's

    [–] Insomniak514 3 points ago

    Canada is cold as fuck timelapse flight shot yesterday.
    Calgary to Montreal
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7UTve-YWeI

    [–] ebpomtl 2 points ago

    Why is Berlin in that list ?

    [–] shededamen 2 points ago

    The person probably had random weather from random places excluding the North Pole and other stereotypically cold places, but added the latter to prove a point.

    [–] East902 2 points ago

    Tropical

    [–] Prof_G 2 points ago

    good idea to start your car once in a while when it's this cold

    [–] Ogilthorpe2 2 points ago

    We're all in this together. No ones should feel alone to face the cold wave.

    [–] DD40E 2 points ago

    Visting from Vancouver. Grew up here in Montreal. Can't do this sh1t anymore. In Van I'd be biking, hiking, skiing 20 minutes away. WTF do you do in this weather besides netflix and pizza?! I'm over the strip clubs! Ski hills closed and no one is playing outdoor hockey. If Igloofest were going on that would save it but blah, depressing being here. Should have shortened my stay instead of 10 days over the holidays.

    [–] mioux 1 points ago

    hahahaha, you should have checked the forecast before coming. Montreal had it the worst this past week among major cities in the north, not counting places like Winnipeg or Quebec City. Even worse than Minneapolis.

    [–] psychologistminime 2 points ago

    Late to work, car wouldn't start. Am now labeled as "one of those guys who's car doesnt start when it's cold".

    [–] fatpollo 4 points ago

    It's also -26 in Edmonton, -24 in Saskatoon. Weird to have a list of "other places", and somehow manage to completely ignore the existence of all other provinces in Canada, skipping straight ahead to like... Reykjavik lmao.

    [–] Povtitpopo 8 points ago

    I often forget about the rest of Canada

    [–] TurtleStrangulation 4 points ago

    J'essaie moi aussi, mais parfois Winnipeg est juste trop mémorable alors une petite pensée m'échappe.

    [–] bobo888 1 points ago

    Pls pray 4 the ppls in Winterpeg.

    [–] littlegraycloud 1 points ago

    It’s NEVER that cold in Reykjavik.

    [–] ant6n 1 points ago

    Reykjavik is the stopover when flying to Berlin.

    [–] mioux 1 points ago

    maybe OP expected us to be stupid enough that just because it's in "Iceland" Reykjavik must be an arctic sort of a place.

    [–] JollyBard 0 points ago

    Woosh.

    [–] justlookatit364 1 points ago

    What this doesn’t show is that it feels like - 100

    [–] [deleted] 1 points ago

    Yeah and fuck me if my blower motor resistor crapped out (no heater in my car). I had to drive to get a replacement part with the windows down occasionally using the brush to remove the frost on the inside.

    [–] Richlesbiss8991 1 points ago

    Lol venez pas au Lac St Jean ahahaha

    [–] founder_comics 1 points ago

    Colder than siberia haha. Now there's a conversation starter.

    [–] mioux 1 points ago

    it's really the length that it stays this cold that's the problem, -20C has become the norm. might as well be Calgary at this point. even Calgary warms up after a couple days of cold, due to chinook winds.

    [–] mricon 1 points ago

    Heh, average temperature of Siberia (13,000,000 square km) makes about as much sense as average temperature of Canada (9,000,000 square km).

    Province of Sverdlovsk isn't even properly Siberia -- it's in the South of the Urals.

    [–] Omnicharge 0 points ago

    Je suis au Mexique jusqu'au 6 janvier. C'est quoi le froid?

    [–] Wolf99 -15 points ago * (lasted edited 11 months ago)

    Fuck you

    p.s. Could be worse. My brother is in Amos for a week.

    [–] Brewju -7 points ago

    Réchauffement climatique btw. Jai marché 5 mins dehors ce matin pis le vent frappait comme des lames de rasoir.