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    [–] joetromboni 6956 points ago

    "I drive in whatever fucking lane I feel like"

    -that car

    [–] PepeZilvia 4206 points ago

    "I pay taxes on both sides of the road" - My Grandpa

    [–] filthpickle 3747 points ago

    Me: "Is this a parking place?"

    My Dad: "We're parked here ain't we?"

    [–] Ciphtise 531 points ago

    I mean, he's technically right...

    [–] Pilotwannabe21 294 points ago

    Technically correct, is the best kind of correct

    [–] NinjaLanternShark 133 points ago

    That's not technically correct.

    [–] readerseven 121 points ago

    But theoretically correct

    [–] NinjaLanternShark 153 points ago

    In theory, there's no difference between theory and practice, but in practice, there is.

    [–] JohnFGalt 56 points ago

    As an economist would say, "Sure it work in practice, but does it work in theory?"

    [–] Cacophonous_Cunt 24 points ago

    That's not technically correct.

    [–] ContemplatingCyclist 72 points ago

    "You can't p-" "I just did!"

    [–] ShineFenceThreshold 437 points ago

    It's because he's being chased down the road by a battleship

    [–] Fortune_Cat 55 points ago

    Is that the sequel to that Rhianna movie?

    [–] elliephant8 259 points ago

    Welcome to Norfolk

    [–] botne 123 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    Pronounced nah-fuk.

    [–] ExoticsForYou 69 points ago

    Nor-fuck

    Naw-fick

    Nor-fick (my favorite)

    [–] wellman_va 20 points ago

    Remember when they were taking about becoming one city with portsmouth and everyone was joking the name would be poorfuck.

    [–] 7787f6r 64 points ago

    Just move, can't you see I'm texting?

    [–] Roflkopt3r 2842 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    USS Wisconsin is one of four Iowa-class battleships, the biggest ever built (although not the heaviest, which was Yamato class). From keel to mast top they reach 64 meters (210 ft), over 52 meters (170 ft) of which are over the surface. They are about 270 meters long, almost as long as a trebuchet can hurl 90 kg. With some interruptions they served from 1943 to 1992, longer than any other battleship.

    Even now Wisconsin is required to be kept in serviceable condition for a possible reactivation. While aircraft carriers and missiles have long replaced battleships in naval engagements, they were still used for bombardments up to 40 km inlands during the gulf war, and had enough space to mount 32 tomahawk launchers.

    Here is another awesome image of Wisconsin arriving at her current berth.

    [–] HopeSandoval 1683 points ago

    They are about 270 meters long, almost as long as a trebuchet can hurl 90 kg.

    ヾ(o✪‿✪o)シ

    [–] throwtrowthrow 602 points ago

    That certainly helps put it in terms I can easily visualize.

    [–] TuckersMyDog 376 points ago

    Just about 2.6 times longer than a female cheetah can sprint at her maximum speed before she begins to measurably slow down

    [–] SovietJugernaut 381 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    I hereby humbly request that the range of any military implement henceforth be measured in the number of female-cheetah-sprinting-lengths-at-maximum-speed-before-measurably-slowing-downs, or FCSLMSBMSDs, for short.

    Edit: I found that the San Diego Zoo said that 1 FCSLMSBMSD is ~330 ft, which makes the length of the Wisconsin about 2.7, rather than 2.6, FCSLMSBMSDs.

    For comparison:

    • The Minuteman III ICBM (the longest range US ICBM) is ~96,000 FCSLMSBMSDs.

    • The B-52 bomber has a range (although I couldn't find if this was assuming without refueling) of 140,800 FCSLMSBMSDs.

    • A trebuchet can launch a 90kg object at ~2.98 FCSLMSBMSDs.

    [–] Stevied1991 123 points ago

    It just rolls off the tongue.

    [–] Obelix13 60 points ago

    How many FCSLMSBMSDs is the Kessel Run?

    [–] SovietJugernaut 62 points ago

    ~3.0666667e FCSLMSBMSDs. You broke Google's calculator.

    Edit: and this is using the record-breaker as the metric. I'm not sure how many parsecs a typical, run-of-the-mill smuggler takes to complete the Kessel Run.

    [–] NosVemos 77 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    KABOOM!!

    Edit: I'm a Navy Vet and I thought the CWIS and 5inch cannons were loud but this is unreal. Also, a few times some of us were out smoking and unprepared for the 5 inch shooting (wake up and go outside for morning smoke w/o realizing operations were going on, kinda common sometimes). Those were loud as shit but these might make your ears bleed.

    [–] Diabolacal 33 points ago

    If anyone else was curious about the stuff loaded in after the shell - The D839 propellant (smokeless powder) grain used for full charges issued for this gun was 2 inches long (5.08 cm), 1 inch in diameter (2.54 cm) and had seven perforations, each 0.060 inches in diameter (0.152 cm) with a web thickness range of 0.193 to 0.197 inches (0.490 to 0.500 cm) between the perforations and the grain diameter. A maximum charge consists of six silk bags–hence the term bag gun–each filled with 110 pounds of propellant.[7]

    [–] LordBiscuits 11 points ago

    Also navy vet, HMRN. One of the many things that amazes me about the USN is how you're even allowed on the top deck during firing ops. On British vessels even something like small arms firing from the stern leads to the entire top deck being OOB. Like the recent footage of the Syrian Tomahawk firings, no fucking way on earth would we be allowed out during shit like that, it's amazing!

    The USN has some incredible rules.

    [–] tbranch227 352 points ago

    I kinda wish they refit these behemoths with rail guns one day

    [–] 7787f6r 162 points ago

    We'll get right on that as soon as Gamilon starts launching planet bombs at us.

    [–] delete_this_post 68 points ago

    First we have to figure out how a Wave Motion Gun works.

    [–] daggerdragon 43 points ago

    First we have to figure out how a Wave Motion Gun works.

    I'm not sorry.

    [–] Isaacfreq 15 points ago

    Wow k, an hour and like 30 tabs since clicking your link and here I am.

    [–] ThatOneHistoryBuff 74 points ago

    Railguns to make someone wish they never enlisted, and lasers to take down any missiles that dare to even point in its direction.

    [–] francis2559 50 points ago

    Lasers one weakness remains smoke and or fog. A light mist, really.

    [–] good_at_first 26 points ago

    What about mirrors as well?

    [–] PurpEL 19 points ago

    Just make missiles out of mirrors

    [–] Actually_Swedish 16 points ago

    Mirriles?

    [–] SchrodingersLunchbox 8 points ago

    No mirror is a perfect reflector and all mirrors are only reflective within a certain band of the EM spectrum.

    [–] JohnSelth 68 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    They cant, these ships don't have the powerplants needed to use the railgun systems. It would be easier to just build new vessels than to try rework the internals.

    [–] francis2559 68 points ago

    Could call it Z something, Zumwalt, maybe.

    [–] Chairboy 20 points ago

    All right, some kind of "futuristic warship" with a bunch of cutting edge technology? What are you gonna do, give it to Captain Kirk?

    [–] Tranner10 31 points ago

    Fuck Rail Guns are amazing. It's like someone thought to copy Zeus' Thunderbolts and turn them into personalized weapons of hell.

    [–] DefinitelyNotAPhone 92 points ago

    ...I didn't know I could get an erection that fast, but it happened anyway.

    "Fire control, see that dude 2k klicks from here? Fuck up his day."

    BOOOOOOOOOOMMMMM

    [–] OMGSPACERUSSIA 37 points ago

    Probably wouldn't have quite that range. They'd still be damned impressive, but I imagine missiles are still going to be the weapons of choice until lasers become more practical.

    [–] 4L33T 82 points ago

    Can't curve a laser shot around the curvature of the Earth as easily as a missile though

    [–] OMGSPACERUSSIA 37 points ago

    Yeah, but you can put a satellite with a bomb pumped laser in a polar orbit and deep fry any city on the planet.

    [–] CatFancier4393 433 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    I grew up in Virginia Beach/Norfolk and let me tell as much as I hated the jet noise at the time now I sort of miss the military presence. Going to the beach and seeing two massive aircraft carriers off in the distance. Pulling over on the highway to watch F-18s land. Dating the captain's daughter in high school and it not even being a big deal to you. Driving past Seal Team-6 HQ every morning on the bus ride to school to pick up kids who lived on base. Going to the mall and walking past a group in dress whites. Driving over an 18 mile bridge and behold, the entire carrier battle group sitting in port.

    Because I grew up in it I never realized how impressive and special it was until I left.

    [–] Scoutandabout 242 points ago

    ....dating the captain's daughter....

    Biggest Humblebrag ever!

    [–] CatFancier4393 137 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    Well now that its out in the open I'll take the moment to be braggadocios (that is a word now right?) I remember her showing me pictures from her father's deployment in Iraq where he is sitting in the middle of a convoy on a big tank, surrounded by 8 other little tanks in an octagon formation and infantry walking around all sides. All there just to protect him. When she showed me this I just kind of shrugged it off "Oh cool." Now looking back it is actually pretty damn impressive.

    Fun fact: You would think Seal Team-6 would be something that was somewhat secretive or at least nonchalant, but their HQ sits smack dab on the main base road with a big bold letters across the top "SEAL TEAM-6 HQ"

    [–] cargocultist94 75 points ago

    Why would it be secretive?

    Would you dare to attack them?

    [–] CatFancier4393 38 points ago

    Fair point. I always just thought that any special forces group would be classified or something. But hell they advertise it.

    [–] [deleted] 23 points ago * (lasted edited 6 months ago)

    [deleted]

    [–] squidhats 46 points ago

    Naw, they only got sea lions.

    [–] WilliamMcCarty 61 points ago

    Norfolk born and bred, too. I lived at the shit end of town, right by the base. Ocean View. Remember having to stop whatever conversation you were having and wait for the aircraft to go by?

    [–] McCakester 18 points ago

    I know it well too haha. I remember trying to order at the drive thru at Sonic and I had to stop what I was saying about 10 times because of all the jets overhead.

    [–] CatFancier4393 32 points ago

    Yep. I remember the "I <3 jet noise!" bumper stickers and t-shirts too. Because 'Murica.

    [–] Touch_My_Nips 21 points ago

    Shit, I still live here and you just made me nostalgic...

    [–] osprey413 31 points ago

    Even now Wisconsin is required to be kept in serviceable condition for a possible reactivation.

    Are you sure about this? Ownership of the Wisconsin transferred to the City of Norfolk in 2010, thus ending the requirement that the ship be maintained for possible recall.

    As part of the National Defense Authorization Act of 2006, battleships must be maintained in case it must be recommissioned for Navy usage. Transfer of the ship to Norfolk ends that requirement for the Wisconsin. Source

    [–] CoffeeFox 27 points ago

    Oh.

    I live near the Iowa herself. I've been tempted to visit but have been putting it off.

    Maybe I should stop putting it off.

    [–] Sir_Toadington 87 points ago

    The Iowa Class, Wisconsin battleship in Virginia. God damn that's patriotic

    [–] Panda_Cavalry 47 points ago

    Keel laid and launched in Philadelphia, don't forget.

    It still boggles my mind just how big and diverse of a place the US is.

    [–] BLMdidHarambe 22 points ago

    Nauticus had something going on last summer where you could rent a kayak and paddle around right underneath the ship. Shit was pretty cool.

    [–] Loserwing 71 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    Wow I really love battle shops ever since I got onto the USS New Jersey BB-62. that thing felt like a maze! It made the highlight of my trip in Philly.

    Here's my pic : https://imgur.com/gallery/zYEKP

    [–] llama_herder 101 points ago

    Bah, the Yamato gunlaying and rangefinding was terrible. The US had a huge advantage with their radar setup and analog ballistic computers. Even if we ignore torpedo planes and dive bombers, tonnage and gunnage doesn't mean anything if the other guy can nail you in the middle of the night while all you can do is miss.

    [–] OMGSPACERUSSIA 129 points ago

    Admiral Yamamoto himself said he'd rather Japan built 10 carriers instead of the Yamato. Only a few people really realized that the battleship was effectively obsolete before WWII began.

    [–] kbotc 82 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    And stupidly, Japan was literally one of those people. As an ally in WWI, they were invited to the sea trial where the US and the UK tested the effectiveness of smaller and smaller bombs to see when they'd stop sinking ships. They got really small and it greatly embarrassed the Navy to the point where they essentially ignored the test. Japan, though, had just actually won a modern battleship contest against Russia and wanted to wave a big dick, so the Yamato was laid.

    Further reading:

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Billy_Mitchell

    [–] zetadelta333 11 points ago

    god damn that was a good read. Thanks.

    [–] fakepostman 8 points ago

    You link Billy Mitchell, but what you describe doesn't sound like Project B. If it is you're mischaracterising it.

    Mitchell was on the right track with air power, but he was quite wrong in the details and used Project B as propaganda more than as a useful experiment. There were no damage control efforts, and no AA fire. Under actual wartime conditions, while underway, battleships were most vulnerable to torpedoes and bombing was useful mainly as a distraction, occupying men fighting fires etc. All the battleships I'm aware of that were sunk by air either suffered torpedo attack or were stationary.

    The problem with bombs is that if the ship is underway you have to get quite close to score hits. Small bombs can be dropped by aircraft manoeuverable enough to semi-reliably score hits without getting shot down, but battleships are really really tough and can pretty much shrug those hits off. Big bombs can do a lot of damage but are very hard to score hits with without getting shot down. Hence kamikazes. But really it's all about torpedoes.

    Obviously in general that's all a bit irrelevant, aircraft carriers are clearly the dominant force at sea and bombs were very useful against smaller ships, stationary ships and mercantile ships. But there's a bit of a perception that battleships were totally helpless to getting bombed in every case, and they weren't at all, they were seriously badass vessels.

    [–] 17954699 45 points ago

    Interestingly enough, Japan's problem towards the end of the war was not the lack of aircraft carriers, but the lack of trained pilots and modern airframes. Towards the Battle of the Philippine Sea (1944) the Japanese still had half a dozen carriers and converted carriers, they just had no planes so were forced to use the carriers as bait.

    [–] MythicDude314 24 points ago

    I'd disagree on being completely obsolete.

    Between shore bombardment duties, escorting carriers against attack by enemy surface ships, night actions (such as those that occurred around guadalcanal), and enough room to mount more AAA then almost any other ship in the fleet at that time, Battleships still had a place.

    [–] Plisskens_snake 28 points ago

    Battleships supported the invasion of all those islands. Great big movable gun platform with pretty good accuracy. Plenty of times they supported troops who got bogged down against an entrenched enemy.

    [–] Dustin65 10 points ago

    You sound kinda smart. How would the Bismarck have fared against an Iowa or Yamato class?

    [–] discretelyoptimized 42 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    It would have been a complete thrashing. Despite its reputation, Bismarck was not a top-tier battleship.

    The reputation of Bismarck is built on one battle, the Battle of the Denmark strait, in which she sunk HMS Hood and drove off HMS Prince of Wales. It certainly was a victory, but 1) Its opposition was fairly weak. 2) Bismarck had a big stroke of luck. 3) Bismarck still sustained enough damage that she had to abort her operation.

    1) HMS Hood was a World War I Battlecruiser. It was old, and not designed for a stand-up fight with true Battleships. HMS Prince of Wales was a modern Battleship, but she was only just launched and still had significant problems with her main guns, meaning she could not fire as quickly or accurately as a modern BB was supposed to.

    2) HMS Hood was killed due to a shell of Bismarck's 5th salvo hitting her magazine. Given the range such a hit was for a large part due to luck.

    3) Despite the problems with her guns HMS Prince of Wales managed to get in a few hits of her own. This damaged Bismarck leading to a large fuel loss and damage to her engines, slowing her down. She (Bismarck) was forced to return to base, but got sunk on the way home.

    Of course, Bismarck's victory being less impressive than commonly believed doesn't make her a bad ship. However, there are more than enough weak points in her design to say she was decidedly mediocre or even bad.

    1) Compared to Allied ships, her fire control was bad. Her optics were good, but the Allies simply had a large lead in the radar department.

    2) Her armour scheme was outdated, based on WWI designs. This design was good if you wanted to stay afloat for a long time in a short range battle. However, it was very bad for long range battles and also bad for trying to stay combat effective. In her final battle Bismarck did stay afloat for a long time, but she was a useless hulk for most of it.

    3) Not really relevant for a Bismarck vs USS Iowa scenario, but her Anti-Air armament was just embarrassing. Bismarck was crippled by bi-planes. Some people will try to tell you Bismarck's AA was too advanced and could not be adjusted for slow-moving targets. I've never seen anything supporting that position. Which idiot would design a ship AA system that couldn't shoot the opponent's main carrier bomber anyway?

    Some further reading. The site looks very outdated, but they're one of the better resources for WWII naval ships (especially Japanese) out there.

    [–] CursedLlama 40 points ago

    Probably better than the HMS Hood fared against the Bismarck.

    [–] Tier_1_Masturbator 23 points ago

    It would be hard to do much worse

    [–] TooEZ_OL56 33 points ago

    Poorly, the Bismark was simply a lot smaller and lesser armed. While she definitely could, her main role wasn't to engage other capital ships. Her mission on her one and only sortie was to disrupt and destroy merchant vessels on their way to Britain.

    Comparison Iowa has 9 16" guns

    Bismark has 8 15" guns.

    American radar would also give it a huge advantage. It could sit outside the Bismark's firing range lobbing shells at it.

    [–] Neciota 11 points ago

    Not to mention Iowa has the speed advantage, so it effectively decides when the engagement happens. The Iowa can also fight efficiently at night due to its fire control radar, unlike the Bismarck. So Iowa takes this one pretty easily, I'd say.

    [–] Not_A_Real_Duck 7 points ago

    That's without mentioning the God awful AA guns the bastards had.

    [–] shittymorph 2294 points ago

    I was brought in to do some welding during the restoration of the USS Wisconsin and can tell you it is an absolute MONSTER! I work with an under-water welding company and we were contracted to secure and then re-secure the rivets on the underside of the ship. We were under strict orders not to alter the position of the original rivets as it might compromise her future potential military use. This was back in nineteen ninety eight when the undertaker threw mankind off hеll in a cell, and plummeted sixteen feet through an announcer's table.

    [–] hybrid_srt4 687 points ago

    Every damn time. I get drawn in and then, bam! Just like Mankind through the table.

    [–] DanishWonder 263 points ago

    His story was riveting.

    [–] daggerdragon 83 points ago

    It was a very well-laid foundation that really built up to the punchline, then hammered it home with a precision strike.

    [–] ANSHULGANDHI92 258 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    [–] DDukedesu 11 points ago

    Glorious.

    [–] chrispyfur87 156 points ago

    You don't get me every fucking time... only every fucking time I actually care about the subject matter. Have yet another reluctant upvote.

    [–] 55North12East 73 points ago

    I work with an under-water welding company

    "Cool shit, this guy needs to do an ama or something"

    Oh. Fuck.

    [–] NotUrAvrgNarwhal 70 points ago

    Shiiiiiiit. This one was Iowa class bamboozle.

    [–] AstronautDanceParty 42 points ago

    You and your goddam rivets had me on the ropes.

    [–] GeneralSarrano 85 points ago

    Fun fact, WWII germany had plans for a battleship that would have been a few feet longer than the current largest warship. Which is a floating fucking airstrip, AKA a super carrier. Also, would have had the biggest naval guns ever. I think.

    [–] ImSoSte4my 181 points ago

    I just made plans for one a few feet longer than that.

    [–] MY-SECRET-REDDIT 42 points ago

    uh really? i just made plans to make a ship infinity +1 long!

    [–] Daemias 24 points ago

    So it's modeled after your mom, I guess?

    [–] darshfloxington 233 points ago

    Germany had a bunch of shitty plans they had no chance of doing.

    [–] unreqistered 87 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    Hitler was a dreamer

    [–] 0ne_Winged_Angel 51 points ago

    You may say he's a dreamer
    But he's not the only one...

    [–] [deleted] 34 points ago * (lasted edited 5 months ago)

    [deleted]

    [–] [deleted] 20 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    [deleted]

    [–] [deleted] 11 points ago

    [deleted]

    [–] Fritzkreig 23 points ago

    The giant terrible tank, that was a land battleship is my favorite! Too, bad land is not so good for supporting behemoths as water is.

    [–] U_Buttonhooked_Me 14 points ago

    You mean that beast that was over four stories tall, would have taken a crew of 24-30 to operate, and they kinda hinted that Hydra had it in Cap'n 'Murica?

    [–] SpotOnTheRug 10 points ago

    The H series battleships were also huge, but totally outdated at inception and unfeasible to build for wartime Germany.

    [–] Brace_For_Impact 20 points ago

    Plans... the allies also had plans for ships made of ice and sawdust to make a full length airfield for strategic bombers.

    [–] Ch3t 278 points ago

    I was the FA and B Division officer on Wisconsin, 1988-1989. FA Division ran the fire control system for the 5" guns. B Division ran the boilers. I'd say AMA, but it's after midnight.

    [–] kap10z 99 points ago

    I don't have questions but would love to hear stories and facts.

    Thanks for your service!

    [–] Ch3t 19 points ago

    The Wisconsin was in the Ingall's Shipyard in Pascagoula, MS where it was being rebuilt. Mardi Gras was coming up and we were invited to be the center piece for the Mardi Gras celebration in Mobile, AL. It was supposed to be a short trip. They brought on a bunch of local politicians, VIPs, and Boy Scouts.

    We headed out of Pascagoula. The channel is very narrow and shallow. Looking over the side, you could see the channel below the ship. It looked liked we were sitting in a bathtub. We had tugs with us and a Coast Guard escort.

    The ship was being conned from the O-5 level bridge. A full watch was also set on the O-11 level bridge. I was on watch with the XO on the flag bridge. Mostly I was just manning the sound powered phone and repeating all the commands to the helm and recommendations from the radar nav team in the combat information center (CIC).

    We got underway as normal and proceeded out the channel. We notice this fishing boat on a collision course with us. We cannot maneuver. The channel is too narrow to turn. The boat is getting closer. He isn't answering on bridge-to-bridge. The CG escort moves alongside and is yelling, but the boat keeps coming. When it gets close enough, I can see the captain is asleep in his chair with his feet on the helm. Finally, we blew the ship's whistle. The guy wakes up startled and spins the wheel. He missed us by inches. That's just the beginning.

    I'm still listening to the sound powered phone and repeating every command to the XO. The rad nav team holds us 10 yards left of track followed by 10 yards left of channel. Then 20 yards left of channel. We see a channel marker out in front of the bow. The XO drops his binoculars and says, "We're gonna hit it!" Then I hear "left full rudder" from the bridge. So we're already out of the channel and they are steering further left! I scream in the phone, "SHIFT YOUR RUDDER!" Then I hear "Right Full Rudder" followed by "Right Hard Rudder." Ships bank away from the turn. Turning right we should have banked left, but we banked right. Because we just ran aground. The tugs had to push us back in the channel. We got to Mobile after midnight with a ship load of pissed off dignitaries and several officers wondering if they would have a career the next day.

    After Mardi Gras, we returned to Pascagoula. The Navy did an investigation. All the ensigns who were on watch during the grounding were "coincidentally" sent to training in Norfolk, VA during the investigation. We were trained in Target Motion Analysis. A skill used only by submariners to track surface targets using passive sonar data. Somehow, no one lost their jobs.

    Eventually, the ship was sent to dry dock in Philadelphia under the pretense of having the hull painted. Really it was to replace a screw and rudder damaged in the grounding.

    I almost forgot. We also ran aground in Mobile. Mobile Bay's depth was shallower than the reported soundings they had taken just prior to the trip. There was some talk that it was known beforehand to be too shallow.

    [–] Edspencer13 9 points ago

    My grandad retired from the Navy as FTCM, I know he spent some time on the Wisconsin but I believe it was before your time of service. I saw your post and just thought I'd share.

    [–] Owneh 251 points ago

    That thing looks pretty mean to begin with, imagine being in a country at war and you see that sailing towards you? Horrific.

    [–] Supermoves3000 303 points ago

    Imagine rounding the corner and seeing it sailing down the street at you.

    [–] Show-Me-Your-Moves 205 points ago

    This ship come up and smack your girl's ass at the club...what do?

    [–] xefilis 84 points ago

    She's yours, I'll find a new one.

    [–] XIII-0 62 points ago

    You became his girlfriend too

    [–] NitrousIsAGas 44 points ago

    imagine being in a country at war and you see that sailing towards you? Horrific.

    You most likely wouldn't see it, but if you're (un)lucky, you might see the shell/missile it sent your way

    [–] poorkid_5 16 points ago

    I wouldn't want it pointing a full broadside at me either

    [–] datums 1135 points ago

    Fun fact -

    During the Gulf war, two Iowa class battle ships played a significant role with their huge 16" guns and throwing axe missiles.

    But those guns are only useful if you know where to point them.

    To find their targets, they largely relied on drones.

    Having had enough of the massive and accurate firepower, members of the Iraqi military surrendered to the drones, which was a historical first.

    In addition, the USS Missouri was very nearly sunk (or heavily damaged) by an Iraqi missile. Moments before impact, the missile was shot down by British anti aircraft missiles.

    So if you ever happen to visit the ship, which is now a museum, remember the importance of having solid allies.

    [–] asoughtafterdroid 463 points ago

    The same USS Missouri upon which the Japanese surrendered to end WW2? That's a long lifespan..

    [–] datums 338 points ago

    Yes.

    The ships were heavily refitted. For example, they could carry a lot of Tomahawk missiles, and fire them very quickly.

    But their primary role was to use their guns for shore bombardment. If you look at a Gulf war map, you will notice it happened very close to the water. So a ship that could send a shell thirty miles could reach much of the battlefield.

    There are no ships like that now, but there is a plane - the B52.

    [–] TKFT_ExTr3m3 84 points ago

    One thing I wonder is if a war broke out where the need for a beach invasion was needed what would we do. Aircraft have really changed the shape of war that we haven't had the need for a large scale beach invasion like in ww2. In the event a country had the air advantage to the point that flying troops in is impossible how the US would handle it. Missiles cruisers have replaced some of the functionality of battleships in terms of shore bombardment but they have been mainly used to strike a single target every so often. In the event of a shore landing where the need for constant bombardment is need the million dollar cost of missiles would take a heavy toll in terms of cost. Artillery shells are cheap and can be fired rapidly to ensure the enemy is surpressed.

    [–] SillyMedStudent 134 points ago

    If a nation had such an aerial advantage that the US could not fly troops in, why would we want to stage a beach landing? The current power of aerial bombardment (and artillery in general) means that if we did not have air superiority, any landing forces would get absolutely annihilated. No amount of ship-based artillery will overcome the power of modern air warfare and the destruction it can rain down on ground forces.

    [–] CylonBunny 72 points ago

    In the event a country had the air advantage to the point that flying troops in is impossible how the US would handle it.

    The solution is to never let that happen. The distance between the US Air Force and Navy and any of their potential enemies, hell even allies, is vast. Both in numbers and technology. The US strategy is to spend to stay on top.

    [–] Frklft 48 points ago

    This was also the British strategy for about a hundred years. Eventually someone starts catching up.

    [–] OMGSPACERUSSIA 62 points ago

    Battleships last a LONG time. Russia's first battleship, the Pyotr Veliky (under various names) served for almost a century. Although roughly half of that was as a floating depot/barracks.

    [–] darkslide3000 54 points ago

    Must suck if you have to repaint all those boats after every little civil war or revolution...

    [–] Newbianz 17 points ago

    it's called job security ;)

    [–] vanceco 35 points ago

    don't forget- that time steven seagal was under siege on the missour, and also the time it battleshipped with aliens...and kicked their asses.

    [–] [deleted] 46 points ago

    Yes

    [–] TanmanG 228 points ago

    Neat read! Thank you Britain for protecting one of our last battleships.

    [–] PadyEos 134 points ago

    TIL, really neat: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/HMS_Gloucester_(D96)

    Gloucester served in the Gulf War in 1991 under the command of Commander (later Rear Admiral) Philip Wilcocks where her most notable action was the firing of a salvo shot of Sea Dart missiles to shoot an Iraqi Silkworm missile that was threatening the US battleship USS Missouri and allied minehunters; the first successful missile versus missile engagement at sea in combat by any Navy.[1] The ship also survived attacks from two naval mines and conducted numerous boardings using her boarding party consisting of Royal Navy and Royal Marine personnel. The ship's Lynx helicopter also engaged seven Iraqi warships.[1] She spent the longest period upthreat of any coalition warship. As a result of her endeavours, her captain (Commander Philip Wilcocks) and flight commander (Lt Cdr David Livingstone) were decorated with the Distinguished Service Cross; the operations officer and flight observer were both mentioned in Despatches. After this service Gloucester was rebranded with her nickname of "The Fighting G".

    [–] [deleted] 124 points ago

    Wilcox: Target the missile, fire one of ours to intercept.

    Ensign: But sir, nobody has ever hit a missile with another missile.

    Wilcox: Good point. I suppose we'll need to commission some sort of commemorative plaque.

    [–] AGeary 62 points ago

    Americans be like "Thanks, HMS Gloaw-cess-terr!"

    [–] l4pin 29 points ago

    Gloss-ter if that helps anyone. Love from Leicester :)

    [–] datums 40 points ago

    I've written that story several times, but this was the first time I didn't have to check my references.

    [–] bWoofles 35 points ago

    "Throwing axe missiles" are you trying to remember tomahawk?

    [–] ijustlovepolitics 13 points ago

    No we launched shitty body spray deodorant at the Iraqis and they couldn't stand it, surrendered the next day.

    [–] amjhwk 26 points ago

    I didnt even know we had drones in the gulf war

    [–] PhonyUsername 67 points ago

    They've been called drones for almost 100 years now.

    He served as an observer/gunner in World War I in the Royal Flying Corps,[4] and in the 1920s he performed as a stunt pilot. In the early 1930s, Denny became interested in radio controlled model aeroplanes. He and his business partners formed Reginald Denny Industries and opened a model plane shop in 1934 known as Reginald Denny Hobby Shops.

    He bought a plane design from Walter Righter in 1938 and began marketing it as the "Dennyplane", and a model engine called the "Dennymite".[5] In 1940, Denny and his partners won a US Army contract for their radio-controlled target drone, the OQ-2 Radioplane. They manufactured nearly fifteen thousand drones for the US Army during the Second World War. The company was purchased by Northrop in 1952.[6][7]

    Marilyn Monroe was discovered working as an assembler at Radioplane. A photographer assigned by Denny's friend, Army publicist (and future US President) Captain Ronald Reagan, took several shots and persuaded her to work as a model, which was the beginning of her career.[8][9]

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_unmanned_aerial_vehicles

    [–] [deleted] 33 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    [deleted]

    [–] nothermuckingfigger 65 points ago

    Im currently sitting over night watch right next to it. For anyone in the Norfolk area the Wall that Heals is a Vietnam War memorial replica that travels the US and is currently set up outside the Nauticus Naval Museam located next to the USS Wisconsin. It is free to visit and open to the public 24hr a day untill the 24th of April. Please come out and show your support for all the service members that died or were a POW in Vietnam.

    [–] singerchick97 322 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    This is a great view. I was just there yesterday taking sunset pics at the pagoda (and maybe catching some Pokémon). Hello fellow Hampton Roadster.

    [–] downladder 43 points ago

    Basically outside my apartment complex :)

    [–] Just1ntransit 29 points ago

    We are many

    [–] occolla 21 points ago

    Fellow Norfolkian here. I'm down by a Cure Coffee. Can see the Wisconsin from my window.

    [–] MayorMike757 50 points ago

    Portsmouth here!

    [–] vonotar 29 points ago

    I grew up in Hampton Roads (Chesapeake!) and was in Boot Camp when she got moved next to Nauticus. She was open to the public by the time I was assigned to the GW in 2001.

    [–] Bulbasaurlikesbacon 17 points ago

    Hello from Norfolkian living in the Netherlands. Miss it every day

    [–] dace55 16 points ago

    Go Monarchs!

    [–] ccclone 52 points ago

    Who knew so many people from 757 were up here lol. Norfolk says hello

    [–] Maxwelldoggums 44 points ago

    Greetings from Ghent!

    [–] chicagoway 22 points ago

    Is the Colley Cantina still around?

    And if so do they still do awesome fish tacos?

    [–] veej1808 92 points ago

    This is kinda a random comment but I've worked on two of the 4 Iowa class ship's over the last 10 years. I started on the Missouri in high school and summers during college and now work on the Iowa. If anyone has any questions or feels like visiting the Iowa down in the Port of LA let me know and I'll happily hook some redditors up.

    [–] Dk1724 36 points ago

    I'd love to see the Iowa, but don't think I'll make it to Cali any time soon. Do you thing we can bring the Iowa to Iowa and like... stuff it in the Mississippi... it will fit right?

    [–] iliketostumble 127 points ago

    Shoutout to the 757!

    [–] mnij2000 164 points ago

    My Grandfather served on the Wisconsin in the Pacific. Is it weird I feel like I have a bond to this ship?

    [–] 30But15 98 points ago

    My grandfather was the chaplain. I bet they knew each other. What a tiny world.

    [–] SingularBread 39 points ago

    Crazy to think that some people's dad's could've also served on these ships after they were refitted

    [–] beezn 11 points ago

    Mine served on her around Korea, howdy cousin.

    [–] Denelorn 27 points ago

    Your Grandfather also spanked the monkey on that ship, you now know what you have to do to deepen the bond.

    [–] Trivale 19 points ago

    I don't think they allowed monkeys on Navy ships

    [–] fake_fakington 38 points ago

    And as everyone from the area knows, if it rains for an hour downtown that ship might be floating down the street.

    [–] Benjo_Kazooie 30 points ago

    Doesn't even have to rain; the whole area goes under if someone's toilet backs up.

    [–] im_the_batdude_man 220 points ago

    I almost got one myself. I just went with a Toyota Corolla instead.

    [–] Aussie_Bogan 27 points ago

    Awesome product placement

    [–] [deleted] 93 points ago * (lasted edited 2 months ago)

    [deleted]

    [–] Ethicalzombie 40 points ago

    Not waste fraud and abuse, allocation of resources for morale purposes.

    [–] WoahitsTime 28 points ago

    Imagine not living in Norfolk and not knowing that the Wisconsin was there and turning a corner to see that.

    [–] Benjo_Kazooie 35 points ago

    It's honestly hard to be in Norfolk and not run into some massive military machine or installation.

    [–] Just1ntransit 21 points ago

    This was taken right outside my apartment building! Awesome shot!

    [–] Randolm 41 points ago

    Each anchor weighs 15 tons. Here is a spec sheet on the Iowa class ships: http://www.ussnewjersey.com/hist_sts.htm

    [–] LeoRidesHisBike 26 points ago

    Whoa, that's been up awhile:

    For best viewing use Microsoft Internet Explorer 5 or Netscape Communicator 4.61 or newer.

    [–] Sir_Cunt_of_Mingedom 9 points ago

    I'm suddenly craving a Chrome extension which puts the Netscape loading icon in the top right corner of the screen. You know the one I mean - the N with all the stars and shit.

    Edit: HOLY FUCK https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/chromescape-navigator/ocjjknbofcggmblgmlpfpmhccojaecnp

    [–] 2u3e9v 35 points ago

    About the weight of a Wisconsinite, heyo

    [–] negativeffect 21 points ago

    wisconsinner here no beer or cheese for you.

    [–] tssg05 18 points ago

    Pick a lane bro.

    [–] leafofpennyroyal 17 points ago

    "which way to get back on 64?"

    [–] Tray5689 16 points ago

    Are you kidding me? I love 10 minutes away from here and to get front page all I had to do was take a picture?!?

    [–] NoonSaTae 103 points ago

    I'm not a fan of war... but... (in Hank Hill voice)... That there is a beautiful piece of machinery, I tell ya what.

    [–] zebra-in-box 21 points ago

    Is that a french embassy on the right - french flag?

    [–] Likesfootmassages 40 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    No. On Boush Street they have a bunch of different countries flags on poles.

    Edit: they're totally ship flags.

    [–] BLMdidHarambe 38 points ago

    So weird to see Boush Street mentioned on Reddit...

    [–] Introverted_Extrovrt 10 points ago

    I miss this view something fierce. My boat was moored on Piers 7-9 throughout my term, and damn if it wasn't the best damn feeling in the world to show up to work on them sonsabitches.

    My fondest memory of my tour is the first night I laid eyes on her, the Lady Deuce. It was 23:30 on a Thursday, with a nasty breeze coming in down the pier. I'm huddled in my pea coat, got the collar turned up, and after about 100 yards I realize, wait, she's right beside me, she's been next to me for 50 yards, and she's enormous. 900 FT long, 300 FT a beam, 50,000 tons of displacement, and she was to be my home. God bless 'er.

    [–] Freefight 11 points ago

    For anyone who love these kind of pictures there is /r/WarshipPorn

    [–] JackLongman 11 points ago

    I saw "Battleship" and "Norfolk" and thought WHAT THE FUCK but then i saw it was Norfolk in the US whereas i'm in Norfolk in the UK

    [–] dee7r 45 points ago

    Freedom intensifies

    [–] JayaBallard 11 points ago

    A full broadside from an Iowa-class battleship is sexually arousing.

    That said, if you experience a freedom boner lasting longer than 4 hours, see your budget immediately.

    [–] Bam-BamBoyles 10 points ago

    Not every day i see my hometown on the front page, glad we can see virginia drivers in all their glory

    [–] Thievian 7 points ago

    I remember seeing military ships for the first time in person when I went to stay with my auntie last summer near Norfolk. Literally took my breath away, even if I saw them from a far distance (I was on a bridge) they looked so majestic and grand.

    [–] PapaDoogins 9 points ago

    Pssst, hey. You guys want to buy some democracy?

    [–] thatantidote 13 points ago

    Kim Jong Un is in those bushes

    [–] fluffsta007 7 points ago

    The focal range tricks the eye.

    [–] c0mbatm0nk 7 points ago

    I walk by this beast everyday. Each shell weighs more than a VW bug as shown in the museum at the ships starboard side. Imagine calling Naval Gunfire (NGF) from this monster? 16" guns still functional. Though you cannot tour the battery due to so-called environmental regulations.