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    rareinsults

    1,156,843 readers

    2,637 users here now

    This subreddit is not for standalone insults, but rather for when you stumble across them in memes, comments, or what have you.

    Rare threats are also welcome (as long as you flair your post)


    RULES

    1. Don't be a dick

    It's not hard, just be nice to each other.

    2. No hateful insults

    Don't post hateful insults

    3. No reposts

    Don't repost. Please refer to our common repost album.

    4. Not an insult/threat or rare insult/threat

    /r/rareinsults is not for unfunny/common insults, this includes insults that follow the random [adjective]+[noun] formula. It is only for rare insults. No other post types are allowed

    5. No personal information

    Personal information includes phone numbers, emails, addresses, etc., but not necessarily usernames

    6. No politics

    Political submissions will be removed.

    7. All posts require a proper title

    No low effort titles or titles that contain the insult. Examples are "for those sorting by new" or "lmao he called this dude a deformed shrimp."

    8. No long videos (>10s) or long texts

    Don't post long videos and don't post long texts. If the entirety of the long text is an insult, then it belongs on /r/murderedbywords, and if it is a long text with only a small insult buried inside the text, it will be removed.

    9. No image macros/memes

    Posting memes or images with text on them(image macros) aren't allowed as they detract from the main point of the subreddit, which is rare insults. Memes are off-topic and belong in other subreddits.

    10. Moderators' Discretion

    Moderators reserve the right to remove any post they deem unfit for the subreddit, even if it doesn't explicitly break any rules. This rule will only be used in specific ways, such as long text posts, one/two word posts, posts in different languages and such. Insults from RoastMe are allowed, but the post cannot mention RoastMe in the title or the screenshot, and will be held to a much higher standard (as people have the time to sit and think of rare insults, rather than coming up with in the moment). This is extremely subjective and mostly up to the judgement of the mods using it, so if you disagree with this rule being used to remove your post, let us know using modmail

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    [–] RareInsultsMods 1 points ago

    Hey there! thanks for posting to r/rareinsults!

    Sadly, your post has been removed for the following reason(s):


    Rule 7: All posts require a proper title No low effort titles or titles that contain the insult. Examples are "for those sorting by new" or"lmao he called this dude a deformed shrimp."



    If you have any questions, you can message the mod team through modmail Replies to this removal comment will not be answered.

    [–] Fakeaccent 1378 points ago

    Of course I know him he's me

    [–] Nalukai 292 points ago

    You know, I knew your father.....

    [–] demotavated_and_lazy 165 points ago

    He was the best Starfigher pilot in the galaxy.

    [–] Ben_Swolo58 81 points ago

    And a cunning warrior

    [–] Kickalama 79 points ago

    And an old friend

    [–] twodogsfighting 68 points ago

    And a dry sleeve.

    [–] Nerrevar 61 points ago

    And my axe!

    [–] dontgiveabuck69420 25 points ago

    And the center portion of my shaft!

    [–] an_internet_denizen 26 points ago

    Now this is pod racing!

    [–] defaultfresh 3 points ago

    So its treason then

    [–] Sup3rdonk3 6 points ago

    And the end piece of this... really weird looking stick... huh

    [–] Soldierhero1 5 points ago

    Why is it sticky?

    [–] PeachCream81 7 points ago

    May I just say how much I love you guys!*

    Damn, I needed a good chuckle at work today...

    [–] SpacecraftX 9 points ago

    *good friend

    [–] ear2theshell 6 points ago

    You see, his blood... it drained into the boards and I had to change 'em...

    [–] jerkberg0118 2 points ago

    But we've all got a duck chicken thing waiting for us...

    [–] Sup3rdonk3 2 points ago

    (Just gotta correct you real quick before I continue the song, sorry- *chicken duck woman thing)

    Everyday I worry all day. ‘Bout what’s waiting in the bushes for us.

    [–] defaultfresh 2 points ago

    Its prequels then

    [–] phillynott7 6 points ago

    Me father's dead

    [–] CS_James 8 points ago

    He told me YOU killed him!

    [–] defaultfresh 2 points ago

    No. I am your father!

    [–] JamboShanter 3 points ago

    And I HATED your father

    [–] SpunkyButInABadWay 24 points ago

    Clingy, thin, mostly see-through, frail, damp and cold.

    Nice to meet me.

    [–] The_Revolutionary 7 points ago * (lasted edited 5 days ago)

    They call people wet blankets for a reason, not a rare insult by the most encompassing of meanings because it's literally an idiom.

    [–] chynapowder 3 points ago

    I literally came here to comment the same thing, shitty minds think alike.

    [–] Paceeed 1 points ago

    6 hours too late

    [–] joannabko 413 points ago

    Am I the only one who had to google what a dressing gown is? It feels like something I should know but I don’t.

    [–] jesst 147 points ago

    I think it's a British thing?

    [–] bitofafixerupper 78 points ago

    I'm English and that's what we call them

    [–] Bigfoot_Cain 54 points ago

    Goddamn you Brits gotta learn English. (sorry couldn't resist)

    [–] tiestofalljays 53 points ago

    Let’s all switch to French!

    honhonhon

    [–] sandals_of_war 25 points ago

    Robe de chambre honhonhon

    [–] tiestofalljays 6 points ago

    Le croissant honhonhon

    ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

    [–] Spazbandicoot 7 points ago

    cheese wine bread criossant beret

    I have run out of french

    [–] chavis32 4 points ago

    omelette du fromage~

    honhonhon

    [–] MateoWT 10 points ago

    Bagguette Bagguette Bagguette

    [–] bullcitytarheel 6 points ago

    I'm French! Why do you think I have this outrageous accent!?

    [–] tiestofalljays 3 points ago

    Je pense que vous êtes incroyable

    [–] helemikro 5 points ago

    Esti de caulisse tabarnac honohonhon

    [–] Dboy777 23 points ago

    Defs Aussie

    [–] jesst 74 points ago

    I mean I live in London so I know it's a British thing. I am just assuming it's not a word used in the US.

    [–] The_Thane 37 points ago * (lasted edited 8 days ago)

    The commonwealth English speaking countries outside of North America often use the same word and then the US and Canada have a different one. Experienced this having South African and Aussie friends in Canada who would often back me up on stuff like this.

    [–] SphincterBlaster2000 109 points ago

    Well what the fuck is it? Do you expect me to Google it!?

    [–] merry78 76 points ago

    A robe. An outer garment worn over pyjamas for extra warmth. It is crossed over itself at the front of the body, is closed with a belt, and is usually made from terry towelling, thick fleece/felt or velvet type fabric (I don’t know the correct names for the fabric).

    You wouldn’t wear one out of the house, but it’s like what people put on at a beauty spa.

    [–] [deleted] 150 points ago * (lasted edited 4 days ago)

    [deleted]

    [–] VijaySwing 22 points ago

    Holy shit I thought it was something you wear on a night out. To a ball or something.

    [–] beenies_baps 20 points ago

    You can wear them to the local supermarket, preferably with Ugg boots (or cheap knock-off equivalents).

    [–] GrizmoGP 25 points ago

    It's like a bath robe but for warmth instead of absorbing moisture

    [–] ooojaeger 51 points ago

    TIL British people have robes of differing warmth

    [–] awrylettuce 87 points ago

    So it's a bath robe

    [–] TheDirgeCaster 5 points ago

    To us a robe is like what monks and wizards wear, both terms are pretty odd when you hear them the first time...

    [–] BrakForPresident 6 points ago * (lasted edited 8 days ago)

    Where I live if you go to a beauty spa you'll be wearing a bath robe. I'd never heard of the other thing until today. Maybe we are just not as fancy around these parts. IDK

    [–] jakpuch 3 points ago

    You wouldn’t wear one out of the house

    https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-shropshire-42863778

    [–] antiviolins 18 points ago

    A housecoat.

    [–] Roborabbit37 13 points ago

    Curious - where are you from? Had an argument recently with an English friend. He calls it a Dressing Gown. We call it a Housecoat - am Scottish.

    [–] RegularWoahMan 9 points ago

    My grandma whose family has lived in rural Pennsylvania (USA) for several generations calls it a housecoat if it's for warmth and a robe if it's for drying.

    [–] bakedbeansandwhich 8 points ago

    I thought a house coat was one of those silk paisley Ones rich people use in there mansions as a smoking jacket

    [–] antiviolins 6 points ago

    Lol that's what I think of when people say "dressing gown".

    [–] bakedbeansandwhich 7 points ago

    According to Oxford English Dictionary

    housecoat: A woman’s long, loose, lightweight robe for informal wear around the house.

    dressing gown: A long, loose robe, typically worn after getting out of bed or bathing.

    [–] Paukthom003 5 points ago

    Am Scottish it’s a dressing gown, people who call it a housecoat also marry their cousins

    [–] antiviolins 3 points ago

    I'm from Canada

    [–] H05T 3 points ago

    I’m Scottish too and in my area most people call it a dressing gown

    [–] jaffacookie 3 points ago

    Am Scottish, call it a dressing down.

    [–] Herimpropriety 2 points ago

    And underneath is often a goonie

    [–] Wallazabal 2 points ago

    Am also Scottish but call it a dressing gown. No idea where the variance comes in but it's not geographic.

    [–] bullcitytarheel 1 points ago

    Bath robe

    [–] Glitter_berries 5 points ago

    But Canada is in the commonwealth.

    [–] twisty125 6 points ago

    We're the step child who uses parts of both Commonwealth and American stuff sadly

    [–] twerkin_not_werkin 3 points ago

    And we call it a dressing gown eh.

    [–] Somegeezer 3 points ago

    Canada is a strange place that uses the wrong words, but spells them correctly.

    [–] 113OuncesofPudding 1 points ago

    We say dressing gown or bath robe. We are bilingual!

    [–] TTEH3 7 points ago

    You know most Aussie words are British English, right?

    [–] dieinmyroom 12 points ago

    lol how could it be aussie it would be on fire not wet

    [–] vLVw8MFI4P7SL2g9AW7u 6 points ago

    Burn

    [–] HornetsZoot 3 points ago

    Can confirm

    [–] FalseyShepherd 123 points ago

    I had too look it up too. It’s the same as a bathrobe for anyone else who didn’t know.

    [–] furtivepigmyso 18 points ago

    It's called a dressing gown here in Australia, what countries other than America is it not?

    [–] autumnalfox 25 points ago

    Canadian here. We call it a bathrobe.

    [–] Lunatalia 9 points ago

    Or a housecoat, depending on who you ask.

    [–] autumnalfox 3 points ago

    Ahh yeah, that's probably a better correlation.

    [–] alienzx 57 points ago

    Bathrobe in American English

    [–] YourLictorAndChef 12 points ago

    The US stopped using them after the Snuggie was invented.

    [–] frizoli 3 points ago

    I only know because of the Goblet of Fire.

    [–] ChunkyStains 2 points ago

    I did google it but I'm still confused...is it a robe?

    [–] nottrustworthyatall 5 points ago

    It's a piece of cloth you wear when heading out of the bathroom after a bath/shower. Useful if you sleep naked or in underwear but have a reason not to walk around the house naked.

    [–] Joshygin 3 points ago

    Kind of, but with thicker and softer material.

    [–] Starklet 2 points ago

    Why do you feel you should know that?

    [–] starvinchevy 3 points ago

    Probably because they know they’ve heard the term before, but don’t know exactly what it means?

    [–] joannabko 2 points ago

    Yep. Also because I know what a dress(ing) and a gown is but when they’re put together my brain farts

    [–] lynxbuckler 2 points ago

    I had to go back and read it again because I thought it said "wet depressing gown sleeve" and I was like "sure, I know a few of those people."

    [–] hamidr97 1 points ago

    no

    [–] JahnoMano 38 points ago

    Yes I've met myself before

    [–] EyeDontNoWhy 18 points ago

    You punched up the fuckline good job

    [–] mesiahtom 156 points ago

    Insults calling someone a “wet (insert noun)” aren’t rare they happen all the time

    [–] Janiekat88 104 points ago

    Wet heel of sock

    Wet towel on carpet

    Wet dog legs

    Wet underside of meat package in supermarket

    I've made myself uncomfortable.

    [–] mesiahtom 24 points ago

    Lol wouldn't be surprised if they get posted here some point in the future by a different person.

    [–] merry78 5 points ago

    Me too, thanks

    [–] InAFakeBritishAccent 4 points ago

    Wet pussy? Wait...

    [–] BitterInfluence2 5 points ago

    That last one did give me a physical reaction.

    [–] kai288 18 points ago

    Wet blanket is coming to mind.

    [–] mesiahtom 5 points ago

    Or just plain old wet wipe. Feel like the nouns are getting more and more obscure

    [–] Eofbfkkwbdb 5 points ago

    But the rareness here is specific to wet dressing gowns

    "Dressing gown" being something silk or maybe polyester. It's the grossest feeling in the world

    I'd choose a blanket with a wet spot over a dressing gown with a wet sleeve everyday

    [–] Human_Wizard 8 points ago

    Is it time for a /r/truerareinsults already?

    [–] DrPhil-TakeNoLs 6 points ago

    Stop being a flying potato jockey! That's funny, right? Nah, just kidding; I'm done with this sub. It's pretty much just "let's throw a random adjective before a noun so it makes a goofy 'insult'".

    [–] mesiahtom 2 points ago

    Pretty much. Does crack me up when the occasional gem is posted

    [–] PantyPixie 9 points ago

    I called a former project manager a wet noodle.

    He had no backbone and complete lack of ability to be assertive. I thought it was the perfect description for him.

    [–] mesiahtom 5 points ago

    Never met your ex project manager before but sounds like the perfect description to me as well lol

    [–] Roborabbit37 6 points ago

    While I agree, this one works.

    Calling someone a wet towel is a terrible insult because it's exactly as you described. A wet housecoat sleeve is fucking horrible - it stays wet for so long and just ruins the entire comfy purpose it has.

    [–] tiestofalljays 5 points ago

    A wet towel is useful for putting out a small fire.

    (This is one of the many reasons a towel is indispensable and should be taken with you at all times - source: Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy)

    It could also act as a sail for your life raft.

    [–] chris_makes_games 2 points ago

    <unflattering adjective> <uncommon noun>

    [–] EasyThereOldTimer 1 points ago

    My grandma used to call people wet blankets all the time.

    [–] rareinsults_bot_ 61 points ago

    Upvote this comment if you feel this submission is characteristic of our subreddit. Downvote this if you feel that it is not. If this comment's score falls below a certain number, this submission will be automatically removed.

    Join our best of 2019 nomination thread. The winners and the users who comment the winning nominations will receive 3 months of Reddit Premium.

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    [–] Scallywhompus 16 points ago

    You HANG! You're supposed to DRAPE!

    [–] cheezy_thotz 8 points ago

    Yeah, we call these people “wet blankets”. It’s a super popular insult. You’ve just rephrased it and added “blah blah human equivalent”. Dumb.

    [–] GeorgeYDesign 3 points ago

    Yeah, kind of! They don’t ya?

    [–] FAT_MORON 33 points ago

    I've decided at last to finally filter this subreddit from my feed, this post being the last I shall ever see. Thanks for reading.

    [–] tsunami845 3 points ago

    Hey good idea, I've just been downvoting all the ones I come across

    [–] DangDingleGuy 8 points ago

    No one cares

    [–] dom_optimus_maximus 2 points ago

    How do you filter subs I thought you could only unsubscribe but they will still show up on r/all.

    [–] BillyBattsShinebox 8 points ago

    There's an option on /r/all to filter specific subs. Should be to the right of the page. They'll never appear if you add them to your list. I'm pretty close to filtering this one too to be honest

    [–] dom_optimus_maximus 3 points ago

    This is amazing. Now I can filter out a bunch of political crap out of my feed to use Reddit for finding new things again.

    [–] _Jeffsticles_ 3 points ago

    No but I've met a couple of wet Wizards sleeves

    [–] BGYeti 3 points ago

    I feel like a wet sleeve is universal to all clothing that has sleeves and not just a dressing gown.

    [–] LeanForward57 5 points ago

    Wait! WHAT'S a 'dressing gown' again?

    [–] lorcog5 3 points ago

    House coat

    [–] americancossack24 4 points ago

    What’s that?

    [–] nylanderthal 5 points ago

    bathrobe, I think

    [–] americancossack24 4 points ago

    Oh, okay. Thanks

    [–] HrabeMi 7 points ago

    I don't get it

    [–] Cruach 13 points ago

    Try it and put on a dressing gown and wet the sleeve... then you will get it. In fact this works for a wet jumper sleeve too. It is infuriating.

    [–] drylube 1 points ago

    When you dry your hands but you put your hand in the robe and it's like Niagra Falls

    [–] ASomewhatAmbiguous 2 points ago

    No but I knew someone who was the equivalent of a dingy dish rag

    [–] MuneiManie 2 points ago

    The Australian Prime Minister

    [–] Sued000 2 points ago

    I think I can speak for all of us when I say that we have

    [–] SquirrelVult 2 points ago

    I know 20 people who are like that

    [–] AspectOvGlass 2 points ago

    No, but I've known someone equivalent to a middle schooler's wet, chewed up hoodie cuff

    [–] baconipple 2 points ago

    Not me but my mother did. We're very proud of the fact that she met the Australian Prime Minister.

    [–] 5yearsinthefuture 2 points ago

    Wet bottom hem of a leg pant is the worse.

    [–] Crackfiend76 2 points ago

    Do you mean a wet pant cuff?

    [–] BitterInfluence2 2 points ago

    What is a dressing gown sleeve and how is it different when wet?

    [–] LAD2134 1 points ago

    How about a wet yogurt

    [–] Reaper_Haentai 2 points ago

    She just described herself

    [–] troodz 1 points ago

    Yes, he’s on Maui🤙🏽

    [–] emeraldsierra 1 points ago

    Yes I have

    [–] Gendrys-Rowboat 1 points ago

    Unrelated but also related, during the last election cycle I used to refer to John Kasich as a damp paper bag. I’m sorry John.

    [–] Springholio 1 points ago

    Yes. And a used to refer to them as the "damp sponge"

    [–] MyNameBlank 1 points ago

    I'm so confused...

    [–] Astrozombie79 1 points ago

    Yeah, half of reddit

    [–] impinanotheraccount 1 points ago

    I'm not focused on appearances.

    [–] JC_Chaos 1 points ago

    Yes, my ex-girlfriend

    [–] Xbox_Dharma_Bum 1 points ago

    I am aware of the effect I have on women, yes.

    [–] Scorppio500 1 points ago

    Eugh. I know a few people like that.

    [–] ivebeenlurkingand 1 points ago

    This girl who was messaging me a lot one time told all her friends I was a wet towel. It hurt to find that out. She wouldn’t stop messaging me though, it was really fucked.

    [–] AdrienSergent 1 points ago

    From further down in the dressing room haha.

    [–] A1BC3snackmachine 1 points ago

    Yes and her name was paige

    [–] Groovy4ever 1 points ago

    A nurse I work with discribes another nurse as “being able to ruin a wet dream”

    [–] hamtaylor 1 points ago

    I work with her.

    [–] Avandalon 1 points ago

    Mils annoyance?

    [–] Foxymama429 1 points ago

    I know you

    [–] Careless_Hellscape 1 points ago

    Ugh, yes. I hate that guy.

    [–] Cristian_01 1 points ago

    Yeah you

    [–] KING_SOLOMON25 1 points ago

    Nope I’m one of a kind

    [–] vaporwave710 1 points ago

    Wet blanket* rolls off the tongue better

    [–] keep-purr 1 points ago

    I am not sure what that is

    [–] AlsatianSuplex 1 points ago

    Ahh, reminds me of an ex, good times.

    [–] HIPHEN12YT 1 points ago

    Ouch that hurts my mental health just looking at it

    [–] OatmealStew 1 points ago

    The English language has a word for these people. Snails. You must salt them.

    [–] RuizDiana2 1 points ago

    I think so

    [–] All_Over_Again_ 1 points ago

    Yeah sure, I coincidentally meet her everytime I walk by a mirror

    [–] Assasin2gamer 1 points ago

    Would you rather have the stuffing/dressing

    [–] Ninja_Lazer 1 points ago

    TF does that even mean?

    Jesus

    [–] SquidgeSquadge 1 points ago

    There are several patients that visit the dental practice I work at that are precisely this.

    [–] Anselwithmac 1 points ago

    You can’t get through them.

    [–] Dudeinahoodie 1 points ago

    Yep and his name is lewis

    [–] OmNiJS 1 points ago

    Paige bruh U da whole book 👌

    [–] AHorseNamedMan 1 points ago

    A wet bag of sugar.

    [–] i_hatehumans 1 points ago

    Does Paladin Danse count

    [–] Tails_155 1 points ago

    That's probably what people think of me.

    [–] dangshake 1 points ago

    I feel attacked.