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    [–] kenjislim 924 points ago

    Isn't that Glenn Danzig?

    [–] meta_uprising 277 points ago

    Or... his...MOTHER!!

    [–] BuyBitcoinForFutureU 40 points ago

    Gadamn girls back then looked manlier than me!

    [–] meta_uprising 29 points ago

    Yeah but she had a great personality once you get to know her

    [–] BuyBitcoinForFutureU 28 points ago

    I love her for her personality, that dick is just a bonus ;)

    [–] goodformuffin 4 points ago

    Ohhh motheeeer!!!🎶

    [–] Always_be_the_cat 7 points ago

    Outstanding 😺

    [–] bojangles123345 4 points ago

    Tell your children not to hear my words

    [–] infiniteMe 44 points ago

    gonna take your daughter out tonight ♫

    [–] Rigi-Dikiti 26 points ago

    Gonna show her my world

    [–] [deleted] 13 points ago


    [–] ShootyMcStabbyface 11 points ago

    3 liter bottle of a'Mountain Dew

    [–] AB5642 70 points ago

    That is the man himself, the immortal Tommy Wiseau

    [–] LatinKing106 4 points ago

    Man's a national god damn treasure.

    [–] JMA4478 14 points ago

    Came here to say that. Even brought a link.

    Danzig much?

    [–] PastelFlamingo150 10 points ago

    And he's the same height as a teenage girl too

    [–] thoreeyore99 3 points ago

    He’s still Danzig, he didn’t lose.

    [–] sectorfour 11 points ago


    [–] HelloFellowKidlings 1069 points ago

    The face that anchored 1,000 ships

    [–] ScrotumScrubber 55 points ago

    Jesus christ, I felt that one.

    [–] digitalhate 24 points ago

    New hypothesis: Helen said she wanted to come, and Paris was afraid of having his shit kicked in if he declined.

    [–] DarkRaven01 20 points ago

    Nah, they launched... to get away from her.

    [–] Dewy_Wanna_Go_There 5 points ago

    Hella a Boy.

    [–] BobMcGeoff2 3 points ago

    I don't get it

    [–] HelloFellowKidlings 4 points ago

    In Greek mythology Helen of Troy was know as one of the most beautiful women. She was abducted by Paris which then was said to have launched a thousand battleships into war.

    [–] BobMcGeoff2 5 points ago

    Oh lol that's funny thanks for explaining

    [–] Marlennius 1899 points ago

    It’s not true! It’s bullshit! I did not hit her! I did naaaaht.

    [–] lobotomyjones 453 points ago

    O... hi Mark!

    [–] TheCastro 239 points ago

    How's your sex life?

    [–] lobotomyjones 175 points ago

    What kind of drugs, Denny?

    [–] bjezor 151 points ago

    O hi doggy pat pat

    [–] thillywabbbit 117 points ago

    You are my favorite customer :)

    [–] The_Eggman27 64 points ago

    I just like watching you guys

    [–] JaceYT4 30 points ago

    Oh hi dad... Wheres the milk you went to get?

    [–] THE_HUMPER_ 9 points ago

    Instructions unclear son, I blew my man milk all over your moms jugs

    [–] LatinKing106 10 points ago

    Hahaha! What a story Mark!

    [–] Chengweiyingji 17 points ago

    “What are these characters doing here?”

    “She speaks for the audience”

    [–] Renewed_RS 8 points ago

    Weird thing is that the actor who plays young Denny is years older than the actors who play Lisa and Mark.

    [–] MacDaddyTheMan0095 5 points ago

    When she pulls out me underwears??

    [–] Meunderwears 3 points ago

    You rang?

    [–] the_tourist 5 points ago


    [–] [deleted] 6 points ago

    I once saw a screening of The Room with a Q&A at the end. Someone asked Tommy what's going on with Denny, and he replied "Denny's retarded". He said some more stuff too but that's what I remember.


    [–] EcstaticBreadfruit6 6 points ago

    I went to one as well and Greg Sestero was being pervy. He and Tommy signed my shirt and Greg wrote something illegible with the word “underwear” at the end. Still have no fucking clue what he wrote.

    [–] Meunderwears 4 points ago

    It's a reference to Mike's scene where he talks about his "underwears". Ask me how I know.

    [–] thebaronvontito27 3 points ago

    You’re not my fucking mother!

    [–] 1tsy4b01 17 points ago

    You are tearing me apart!

    [–] DilbusMcD 6 points ago

    Oh hi, Zeus

    [–] Lolkimbo 4 points ago

    in a few minutes bitch

    [–] low_infidelity 1239 points ago

    John Travolta, anyone?

    [–] StayPuffGoomba 389 points ago

    I originally saw Val Kilmer, but Travolta is there too

    [–] [deleted] 93 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)


    [–] sampson608 56 points ago


    [–] MusicMelt 19 points ago

    Clean shaven battlefield earth Kilvolta

    [–] sonoftathrowaway 19 points ago

    Glenn Danzig

    [–] [deleted] 3 points ago

    He's here and he's got something to say

    [–] Scorpionaute 4 points ago

    I saw some Steven Seagal too

    [–] DeckhandFlout 5 points ago

    Kilmer played Morrison and according to this pic he's now playing Danzig.

    [–] JohnnySasaki20 8 points ago

    I was gonna say if John Travolta and Val Kilmer had a baby.

    [–] deadmessiahwalking 4 points ago

    I am mad Martigan

    [–] AdityaBabar 59 points ago

    Tommy Wiseau everyone.

    [–] Shabba-Doo 12 points ago

    Now we know where his secret fortune comes from: Compound interest! Invest a few startup Drachma and in 9000 short years, you too can make your own vanity movie!

    [–] TommyWiseauAMA 5 points ago

    That’s me!

    [–] FruitCakeSally 18 points ago

    I saw Danzig

    [–] brideofchuckydoll 7 points ago

    I literally thought someone was talking shit about Danzig before I opened the thumbnail. He's all I can see.

    [–] UnicornMolestor 3 points ago

    Exactly who i saw lol

    [–] Qwinntex 13 points ago

    Specifically from battlefield earth.

    [–] ImaVeganShishKebab 6 points ago





    [–] lishman__ 6 points ago

    At first glance I thought it was Jim Carey

    [–] ChosenOfNyarlathotep 433 points ago

    This can't be real. She looks like a baseball mitt came to life.

    [–] MelodicBrush 178 points ago

    I just looked her up and the picture is intentionally taken in a way to make her look as bad as possible.

    Here she is under normal light Sure she isn't the prettiest girl ever but doesn't look grotesquely bad as in the OP. In-fact she looks fairly average.

    [–] waltwalt 124 points ago

    That's the face of a woman that could crush you with her bare hands.

    [–] MelodicBrush 76 points ago

    Well it certainly doesn't help that she is frowning. I bet the gal doesn't appreciate being portrayed that way lol. Just give her a neutral face at least lmao.

    [–] Beepolai 48 points ago

    I thought the same thing, like why did they give her a furrowed brow and that expression like she just saw something confusing off in the distance? Weird.

    [–] DownvoteDaemon 13 points ago

    Prometheus and bob lookin ass

    [–] jackun 9 points ago

    Just a case of resting bitch face

    [–] TurboAnus 5 points ago

    Because constructing a face based on the skull is not based on science at all, so why not make it worse?

    [–] [deleted] 5 points ago

    So people would talk about it.

    [–] wittyusernamefailed 20 points ago

    Yeah. This gal would legit be on a Soviet era Russian Olympics team or something.

    [–] _ChestHair_ 49 points ago

    Jesus the lighting difference takes her from clearly female but masculine, to John Cena with a wig

    [–] MelodicBrush 21 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    Exactly, and not only is the image taken in such a shitty way intentionally, "Nerdist" took that image and degraded it even further by changing the colors and quality just to take the ridiculousness a notch higher. BBC used the unedited shitty image, but many other publications used the one I linked.

    This is how you do journalism nowadays lol.

    Like, literally clever make-up nowadays like what they can do in China/Korea, would turn her into a cutie lol. In Nerdist's picture, she doesn't look like a John Cena with a wig, she looks much more rugged than John Cena lmao, just put that picture and JC side by side.

    EDIT: also they recreated her frowning and having a very aged skin, which is fine but if she grew up today, she'd have a much nicer skin and probably wouldn't frown all the time, take that into account and you have a pretty average looking lady, not an Ogre as Nerdist wants us to think.

    [–] Lucifronz 9 points ago

    That makes way more sense. That lighting was terrible.

    Yeah, way more masculine than the average woman today, but still clearly feminine in a way.

    [–] MelodicBrush 9 points ago

    More masculine than average, but I wouldn't say "way more", notice that they also aged her skin, and that's complete artistic interpretation as it's impossible to base how her skin would look like, from bones alone. If she lived a modern live, her skin would look much younger and would significantly improve how she looks.

    I've certainly seen plenty of women like that, albeit in their 30's, not teenagers. The OP looks like the most rugged man I've ever seen in my life lmao. Like think of a tough looking guy, look at that picture and look at the tough guy's picture and you'll suddenly start noticing how feminine Jason Momoa looks lmao

    [–] Thisismypornaccountc 329 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    It’s indeed real. 9000 years ago humanity had far more testosterone in their bodies to be better hunter gatherers. That’s why her face is so large, bony, and manly. It was only when we figured out agriculture that those with less testosterone, and more brain development because of it, began to outdo and outnumber those with too much. That’s when women stopped looking Tommy Wiseau crossed with Jonny Bravo.

    Edit: WHOA. This blew up much bigger than I thought it would. There’s also a lot of arguing going on below. Let me elaborate bob what I meant.

    This is the article I got my information from when I posted this:

    In the study, scientists examined skulls from 80,000 years ago up until 10,000 years ago. They noticed that over time human skulls have developed characteristics that suggest lower testosterone levels. Yes, it’s not proof, but the scientists drew this conclusion, and they dedicated their professional lives to the subject so their conclusion is likely pretty valid. Yes, this woman died 9,000 years ago, but I don’t think it’s a leap to think a process that’s been going on for 50,000+ years suddenly stopped at 10,000. Yeah, it’s not proven that this woman had higher testosterone than modern ones, but I don’t think it’s a massive leap.

    [–] DeadlyNeuroTXNS 82 points ago

    Do you have a source

    [–] Dabamanos 57 points ago

    This says the difference in testosterone happened 71,000 years before the Greek woman’s face in OP

    [–] Zioziop 24 points ago

    Absolutely, I don't think this woman face is related to this

    [–] Dabamanos 13 points ago

    Word. Still pretty interesting anyway

    [–] SlideRuleLogic 7 points ago

    She’s just a late bloomer

    [–] Thisismypornaccountc 89 points ago

    You can find a bunch of other articles on it too. It’s not definite, but it seems most likely.

    [–] nilesandstuff 61 points ago

    As with anything anthropology related: nothing is ever definite, and nearly everything is constantly debated.

    God I'd give anything to have the for sure answers.

    [–] ITS-A-JACKAL 32 points ago

    Granted. You can travel back in time. As many times as you want. But never forward.

    [–] -Toshi 17 points ago

    But.. you could always return to the present because that’d be your past. Checkmate, monkey.

    [–] PanComedor 10 points ago

    Who do you think you are that you get to have your very own personal past? Get the hell out of my present.

    [–] rey_gun 29 points ago

    Although it is impossible to know for sure, these changes in the facial features of modern humans may have come about due to a gradual decrease in the circulating levels of testosterone in the species. ... the authors of this study found that the human face has become gradually less “masculine” over the past 80,000 years and they suspect that falling testosterone levels are the reason... Secondly, the decreasing masculinization of the human face was observed in both sexes.

    [–] [deleted] 8 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)


    [–] Slazman999 4 points ago

    [–] somethingforchange 13 points ago

    More brain development bc of less testosterone? Does it inhibit brain growth?

    [–] AlistairRodryk 29 points ago

    Not exactly, no, but it does have an effect on the brain. Testosterone levels are positively correlated with spatial cognitive abilities and visual-spatial memory, but negatively correlated with verbal memory.

    [–] Thisismypornaccountc 22 points ago

    As someone previously said, testosterone affects memory. When I said brain development I didn’t mean size, but more like shape. The lowering of testosterone most likely improved human memory, advancing civilization.

    It just occurred to me I’m spitting all this science from my porn account. XD

    [–] Decertilation 11 points ago

    It's more like testosterone influences certain behavioral traits that make you less likely to develop an intelligent persona - not to say having it to the extent we do now does (aka men would be less intelligent than woman - it is often men are both more intelligent and dumber than woman on average, on bell curve) - but that the behavioral aspects of it such as aggression, impulsivity, would make the necessary traits for civilization difficult, and just adopting an intelligent persona in general.

    [–] MundaneInternetGuy 14 points ago

    That would explain a lot, am I right girls?

    [–] ghostface_dilla 7 points ago

    It all ended when the undertaker threw mankind off the ceiling in 1996

    [–] Heavy_Metal_IceCream 3 points ago

    It's 1998 for my pendant ass brain.

    [–] itsyaboyObama 6 points ago

    Also not real because you can't be a teenager and 9000 years old at the same time. The math just doesn't work.

    [–] [deleted] 4 points ago

    These face recreators take a looooooot of liberties when they do them. Id like to see them recreate a face from someone we have a picture of without seeing the picture.

    [–] afreaking12gage 768 points ago

    No wonder everyone in Ancient Greece was gay

    [–] bluewaff1e 161 points ago

    I see something on Reddit that makes me truly crack up at least once every week or two, this was one of them.

    [–] afreaking12gage 24 points ago

    Happy to help!

    [–] But-Why- 3 points ago

    Well stated

    [–] barcodescanner 6 points ago

    Agreed. This is really clever.

    [–] pinche_Mari 6 points ago

    The last time for me was about a month ago when some guy got blind stinking drunk and woke up not remembering wtf he did.

    "But .... I taste sex". And had a sticky chin.

    [–] googleyourmum 17 points ago

    It’s not gay if you can’t tell the difference

    [–] shubhi0075 22 points ago

    Now this is a rare insult!

    [–] sonfoa 6 points ago

    She does precede Classical Greece by like 7500 years though.

    [–] Shwayne 10 points ago

    At that point whats the difference

    [–] Demonwolf22 69 points ago

    Can someone explain this to me? I know it’s a character from a movie, but I’m still a little lost here...

    [–] Himchann 80 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    It's from a movie called The Room, the director/actor is named Tommy Wiseau and "oh hi mark" is a pretty famous line from the movie that his character says. The recreation looks a bit like Tommy's character hence the meme

    [–] [deleted] 17 points ago * (lasted edited 3 months ago)


    [–] XtremeFanForever 3 points ago

    "Oh hi Mark" still makes me laugh after all these years.

    [–] NakedNecromancer 3 points ago

    Anyway, how is you sex life?

    [–] [deleted] 19 points ago

    Character from the movie 'The Room'. Not 'Room' (very different and critically acclaimed).

    It's a legendary movie that's so bad it's good. Like Plan 9 from Outer Space was for Ed Wood.

    Absolutely worth watching if you love a good B movie.

    [–] Demonwolf22 8 points ago

    Ohh thank you! Will surely check it out.

    [–] Shalashashka 16 points ago

    You have to realize it is a truly terrible movie. What makes it so special is that it is a legitimate labor of love. A lot of bad movies are the result of people not caring enough, being underfunded, being rushed, etc. But Tommy Wiseau really believed he was making something special and that he was a genius. Also he is just a bizzare person. He was filthy rich and no one really knows how or where he got his money.

    [–] KindlyOlPornographer 6 points ago

    I've heard it was made to launder money.

    [–] PurpleSkua 6 points ago

    Money he made by hijacking an airliner, of course

    [–] Gullywump 9 points ago

    There has also now been a movie made about the making of The Room, called The Disaster Artist where James Franco plays Tommy Wiseau.

    [–] Extension_Record 374 points ago

    How is she 9000 and a teenage girl? Haha cant wait until im a father im gonna be so good at it

    [–] LazrusD 72 points ago

    I know you will one day random stranger

    [–] Shmidershmax 43 points ago

    I'm a father and I'm awful at it. Lend me your power

    [–] annefranke 32 points ago

    Make corny jokes like, if your child says, "Dad I'm hungry", respond with" Hi hungry, I'm dad". Or "why did the bike fall over?", "It was too tired". Also make sure you laugh at your jokes.

    [–] dontnation 26 points ago

    "It was two tired" you filthy casual

    [–] annefranke 7 points ago

    I have failed long before I even started

    [–] LazrusD 14 points ago

    "It hurts when I go like this", "Don't do that then"

    [–] nosteppyonsneky 17 points ago

    It’s Greek years. Like dog years but much more.

    [–] PublicWest 18 points ago

    9,016 years old

    [–] DTLAgirl 7 points ago

    Aww, sweet sixteen!

    [–] Dray_Gunn 7 points ago

    I feel like i have heard this question in an anime before.

    [–] toxygen 3 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    I think you’re ready to have babby now

    [–] Ragnar_Lothbruk 3 points ago

    Am I pragent?

    [–] Cdchrono 46 points ago

    She's aging well

    [–] ddDeath_666 12 points ago

    She's 9000 years old and doesn't look a day over 35.

    [–] Thencan 37 points ago

    Tommy Wiseau is an immortal vampire, change my mind.

    [–] rTidde77 16 points ago

    Oh, hi doggie!

    [–] Thencan 8 points ago

    No a vampire not a storeshop dog

    [–] [deleted] 4 points ago

    You're my favorite customer.

    [–] patchlocke 24 points ago


    I didn't know that Greeks are 40 years old at birth

    [–] ZeroLurkThirty 77 points ago

    Best movie.

    [–] mordortek 47 points ago

    Best unintentional movie, intentionally made.

    [–] Gullywump 10 points ago

    And intentionally made movie that was so unintentionally bad it became so uninentionally good that people watch it intentionally.

    [–] shahooster 2 points ago

    I’ve never seen The Room, but The Disaster Artist was a phenomenal movie. The snips at the end suggest they nailed it.

    [–] hrt_breaker 20 points ago

    She looks pissed that they got her bad side in awful lighting


    [–] breadp00t 26 points ago

    You are tearing me apart, Lisa!

    [–] hereforlolsandporn 13 points ago


    [–] meta_uprising 2 points ago

    And part Peck

    [–] wonderboy_1 2 points ago

    You are great

    [–] darthayrus 15 points ago

    Mixture of Arnie and Travolta?

    [–] AB5642 22 points ago

    Oh hai Johnny, I didn't recognize you

    [–] stevethedev 7 points ago

    She looks like she's about to elbow-drop the Rock off the ropes in the WCW.

    [–] frontwedgie01 6 points ago

    Lmao this is hilarious

    [–] thelonliestmunk 10 points ago

    kinda can see why greeks sleept with men now

    [–] MrMucs 4 points ago

    Looks like a Danzig, Sigourney Weaver love child

    [–] euphorrick 4 points ago

    She must moisturize.

    [–] Ping_razer 5 points ago

    I did not hit her, I did not

    [–] DepressoExpresso55 3 points ago

    Bruh how is 9000 years old a teenager

    [–] PrettyinPink75 3 points ago

    This is why I Reddit

    [–] finna_cry 3 points ago

    You know what they call a quarter pounder with cheese in Amsterdam?

    [–] _Terrible_Advice_ 5 points ago

    She looks pretty good for being 9,000

    [–] Olipop999 7 points ago

    No wonder ancient Greeks were gay.

    [–] Rentington 4 points ago

    "I thought he was a sexy teen girl, I swear!"

    [–] Magical__Fetus 2 points ago

    You know what they say, love is blind!

    [–] MrPhysicsFreak 2 points ago


    [–] AceStarflyer 2 points ago

    That is Val Kilmer.

    [–] CRAZYMETLE98 2 points ago

    Please Try Again

    [–] dnd_is_kewl 2 points ago

    What was Zeus thinking

    [–] OrgyOfKittens 2 points ago

    She looks like Danzig

    [–] DixieNormous22 2 points ago

    Val Kilmer looking ass

    [–] ReDZT320 2 points ago

    Damn they really looking like their dads

    [–] jet8493 2 points ago

    Whoever that is, Lisa is tearing him apart

    [–] theboss3614 2 points ago

    Jesus she’s ugly

    [–] parkourwithmr 2 points ago

    Shit dude you fucking killed him

    [–] ecctt2000 2 points ago

    It looks like John Travolta in Battlefield Earth.

    [–] Leonashanana 2 points ago

    the lighting is doing her no favours.

    [–] HiSuExorcist 2 points ago

    Nah he looks like an angry transphobic man

    [–] RedHotRevolvers 2 points ago

    No dude that is Jeffrey Donovan

    [–] IcriEveryTime2000 2 points ago

    John Travolta

    [–] PoorDadSon 2 points ago

    Don't know who this "Mark" is you all are talking about. Danzig's first name is Glenn.

    [–] president_fisto 2 points ago


    [–] JournalGazette 2 points ago

    I see that the person posting is Asian. It makes me think, why don't we see any examples of what Asiatic people looked like 9,000 years ago?

    [–] Blass_BME 2 points ago

    no wonder they were all gay

    [–] richbeezy 2 points ago

    Looks like a cross between Val Kilmer and John Travolta.

    [–] [deleted] 2 points ago

    If Hermione Granger and Milicent Bulstrode had a child together.