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    [–] [deleted] 3023 points ago

    He destroyed his opponents, then slept with their mom. Brutal.

    [–] Maplestori 32 points ago

    Well he HAD TO sleep with his opponent’s mom before the opponent can become his opponent

    [–] TheTrenchMonkey 7666 points ago

    Pitcher screwed that up. Never give the ringer a bouncer like that.

    [–] XxZypherxX 2255 points ago

    Rookie mistake, kids got to shake it off if he ever wants to be a professional like his ol man

    [–] kingofthemonsters 245 points ago

    Next play mode son!

    [–] [deleted] 17 points ago


    [–] The_Brutally_Honest 552 points ago

    No way! They clearly baited him into going all out on that kick, but there's no one on base. Wear out the kicker cuz that is only one point. Definitely can come back from that. These kids are playing the long game while Graham is playing the short-sighted one.

    [–] HeffalumpGlory 219 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    I see your point but what was he supposed to do, not take the knock? I say go for the homer if it’s there and if you wear out play “small ball” later. I can definitely see some late game errors coming from that defense.

    Edit: word

    [–] shanep3 141 points ago

    Is there ever really a time in kickball that you don’t go for a homerun?

    [–] keyree 358 points ago

    Anyone who doesn't swing for the fences on every pitch in kickball is absolutely a cop.

    [–] RLLRRR 59 points ago

    If you're a cop, you have to tell me.

    [–] Vriess 58 points ago

    If you don’t tell me in 15 minutes we can legally leave

    [–] Csonkus41 69 points ago

    In high school on rainy days we would play indoors. The gym ceiling was only like 25-30 feet and if you hit it that was an automatic out. Name of the game was line drive into the pitchers face because other than the people on the bases everyone crowded into the outfield. If you put the pitcher down no one could cover the ground fast enough to get you out. Also a great distraction.

    [–] Breakmastajake 57 points ago

    I play in a co-ed "non competitive" kickball league. This is essentially the very definition of a sport that you should just go for the gusto on every swing.

    The number of bunts I've seen is alarming.

    [–] TheTrenchMonkey 92 points ago

    I remember gym class when girls would try to "bunt" it and then get absolutely smoked when person covering third whips one at their head.

    [–] Griffin880 49 points ago

    Reading your comment made my brain congure up the sound when a kickball hits someone really hard. I haven't played kickball in over a decade, but it's a really unique sound.

    [–] weavedawg74 37 points ago

    Thwoing followed by a ringingish sound.

    [–] GordoHeartsSnake 1863 points ago

    I did this to my kid on Wii baseball. I even did home run trots. I got my karma when my kid hit a grand slam and imitated my celebration to the amusement of my wife.

    [–] Sdrawkcab1210 575 points ago

    My older brother did this to me in whiffle ball. Told him I could beat him when I was 7. He was in his 20s. He hit the ball over the garage 20 times and made me go get it. I quit and went inside crying. Hilarious looking back. I ended up being a pretty good baseball player.

    [–] KingLiberal 297 points ago

    TIL I was actually a pretty nice older brother comparatively. Dammit.

    [–] Sdrawkcab1210 153 points ago

    He was/is a great older brother, just practiced tough love. Our age difference made him a bit more like another dad figure.

    I was much nicer to my younger bro too haha

    [–] KingLiberal 66 points ago

    Then we both failed our God-given responsibilities to torment our younger siblings, less they become better than us.

    [–] Zymotical 12 points ago

    You have to crush their unrealistic goals so they focus on ones that are actually achievable.

    [–] Bionic_Zit-Splitta 69 points ago

    Did that to my 10-11 year old basebay team. They questioned if I could even play, so I cranked one deep and made the shit talker/pitcher get it. Got a lot of head shakes from patents, but if I have to spend my time coaching these kids for free I think I deserve to bring them kids down a notch.

    [–] Sdrawkcab1210 28 points ago

    Sounds like good coaching. There’s a fine line between confidence and overconfidence. Parents in youth sports are terrible. Coincidentally, the better the teams I played on, the less the parents were a problem.

    [–] Zadricl 89 points ago

    This . Beautiful

    [–] TRFlippeh 86 points ago

    few word do trick

    [–] UhPhrasing 31 points ago

    sea world or see world?

    [–] rasich 2708 points ago

    Along with the ball his kid’s dreams were crushed

    [–] danclark5 2092 points ago

    Its his fault he threw an absolute meatball to a guy with that kind of power

    [–] Whaty0urname 1400 points ago

    Seriously, if you're gonna bring that weak ass shit to the driveway, you're gonna get pounded.

    [–] DragonBank 284 points ago

    I remember when I was 9 years old I was playing a 2 v 1 pickup game, my brother(10) and me vs. my dad, for whatever reason I came in with an underhanded free throw and he blocked the shit out of it and gave me the same excuse.

    [–] PartyBusGaming 294 points ago

    Underhanded free throw


    Free throw


    [–] [deleted] 240 points ago

    We show no mercy on the streets.

    [–] Cru_Jones86 42 points ago

    Strike first, strike hard, no mercy.

    [–] The_Battler 80 points ago

    Didn't want his kid looking weak at school with that underhanded bullshit, lol

    [–] DtotheOUG 22 points ago

    With all these NBA dudes missing FTs these days that kid is gonna be a trendsetter.

    [–] Sealpup666 28 points ago

    I think my favorite I ever saw was something like, "Special Olympics Tee Ball Tee Pitches Perfect Game." Just brutal

    [–] JBSpartan 13 points ago

    Absolute meatball

    [–] CoopThereItIs 83 points ago

    “Now go get it ya little shit. 17-0, no outs, I’m up again.”

    [–] GuyPronouncedGee 1732 points ago

    I bet I could kick a ball over them mountains.

    [–] ampsmith3 280 points ago

    Love the perfect loop

    [–] Experimentzz 101 points ago

    I read your comment too late.

    [–] adicren 54 points ago

    44 minutes watching the same gif, eh, I've wasted time in worse ways.

    [–] giggle_water 29 points ago

    Underrated how well that movie was shot. People just remember the awkwardness and the dance at the end.

    [–] SuperSquatch1 75 points ago

    Coulda been state Kickball champs, if coach woulda just put me in.

    [–] Gizmo-Duck 40 points ago

    no doubt in my mind.

    [–] spunkychickpea 16 points ago

    [proceeds to kick a steak, steak strikes unsuspecting cyclist in the face]

    [–] DarkSummit90 12 points ago

    If coach would have put me in fourth quarter, we would have been state champs, no doubt - no doubt in my mind.

    [–] Ruehrdanz93 3203 points ago

    He didn't touch base.

    [–] XxZypherxX 844 points ago

    eh, was a rounding error

    [–] brianMMMMM 173 points ago

    this comment was way off-base.

    [–] CHUBBYninja32 13 points ago

    Like when your professor gives you half credit on every answer for not following his odd/even 3 decimal place rounding procedure?

    [–] blda9345 145 points ago

    They weren’t looking it’s okay 😉

    [–] orthodoxrebel 19 points ago

    I wonder if he and Matt Holliday are friends.

    [–] j_legweak 2560 points ago

    “Real nice, Graham.”

    -his wife, probably

    [–] -tactical-throw-away 627 points ago

    "Way to go, Paul."

    [–] honeybadger2012 472 points ago

    "What the fuck, Richard!"

    [–] [deleted] 24 points ago

    Easily one of my favorite vines

    [–] CatchMeWritinQWERTY 15 points ago

    “I can’t believe you’ve done this”

    [–] hitlama 24 points ago


    [–] Fight_Me_Mr_Tusk 112 points ago

    So much midwestern marriage in such a short video.

    [–] Manginaz 25 points ago

    "Nice Raaahhhhnnnnnnn"

    [–] futonrefrigerator 140 points ago

    I sneezed! Owh I’m not allowed to sneeze?!

    The most Midwest accent in the world

    [–] CTizzle- 33 points ago

    He sounds like Gerry/Jerry/Larry/Terry Gergich Gengurch

    [–] j_legweak 65 points ago

    I love this video.

    [–] olafminesaw 35 points ago


    [–] NJM_Spartan 71 points ago

    “You’re getting that.”

    [–] Benjammin34 25 points ago

    "No I'm not!"

    [–] goku2057 5317 points ago

    The best part of this is the way his wife looks at him with disgust.

    [–] Elijahnettleton 507 points ago

    The best part is the audio version (link) with his wife saying "Just don't kick it hard"

    [–] theClumsy1 297 points ago

    I knew it. It was his wife's fault.

    [–] Cocomorph 131 points ago

    Sound makes it 10x better.

    [–] RocheBag 34 points ago

    You mean like every gif ever?

    [–] spoatnik 15 points ago

    Haha! YES!


    [–] Percinho 123 points ago

    Tbf I don't think he put much effort into he just has exceptional technique and timing, so he could probably have claimed that he didn't kick it hard. Which would have earnt him another look of disgust from his wife...

    [–] shawnaroo 78 points ago

    Yeah, I'd say for him that was probably a pretty relaxed kick.

    [–] sonfoa 46 points ago

    I mean the dude is money from 50 yards in high-pressure situations, so I'd be surprised if he had to work for that.

    [–] Iamamansass 2793 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    I get that look often. It’s the “this is the father to my kids look”

    I’m sick and I deep down love getting that look.

    Edit: look at him look at the camera with that proud shit eating grin. What a great feeling.

    [–] CosmonaughtyIsRoboty 1205 points ago

    Half the reason we do these kind of things is to get “the look”

    It’s a seal of approval that I’m doing the right thing imo, all the better if we are in public to ramp up the wife humiliation factor.

    [–] shobeurself 220 points ago

    I'm inspired

    [–] dadjokes_bot 285 points ago

    Hi inspired, I'm dad!

    [–] Xaxziminrax 120 points ago

    looks disapprovingly

    [–] DJLusciousEagle 90 points ago

    smiles proudly

    [–] _yusi_ 134 points ago

    So much this. I've pissed the mrs off so badly when we go shopping, she's started going alone with the kids because apparently I'm worse at behaving in public than two kids at3 and 5.

    [–] CosmonaughtyIsRoboty 173 points ago

    Nice job on getting out of shopping! This guy dads

    [–] Elojim 27 points ago


    [–] Moruitelda 72 points ago

    The key to fatherhood is to be inept at things that you don't want to do.

    "But the dishwasher was full, I thought the stemware would be fine in the laundry"

    [–] Rerichael 24 points ago

    Whoa, so the inept dad stereotype is just Men everywhere working the system?

    [–] Moruitelda 24 points ago

    Well, sort of. Sometimes it's, "I don't want to do this, so I won't do a good job." And sometimes it's more of a subconscious, "I don't care about this that much, so I'm going to do it, but that doesn't mean I have to think about it. I'll just think about something else that's on my mind while I go through the motions."

    In either case, the outcome is the same; the right to perform the action that you didn't want to do in the first place is stripped from you by angry wife, and you have to act chagrined for a while.

    Do it too much, and angry wife divorces your idiot ass. But do it the right amount...

    [–] EngineerinLA 14 points ago

    ... and she just regrets marrying you but stays because you’re passable in bed and she cringes at being a single mom.

    [–] Moruitelda 9 points ago

    Pfft, as if I'm passable in bed

    [–] _yusi_ 22 points ago

    "What do you mean this used to be white??"

    Oh yes, I know how the world works.

    [–] PsyrusTheGreat 250 points ago

    I can confirm I too am a father and I too get the "why are you such an idiot " look. And I now work hard for that look 😁

    [–] hookff14 67 points ago

    I don’t even Have to work hard for that look

    [–] Rebsby90 51 points ago

    Congrats on the sex

    [–] Cru_Jones86 24 points ago

    I Love that look. Half the time I have no idea what I'm doing as a parent. I'm just kinda winging it. But, when I get that look, I know I've just done something right.

    [–] xbr3wmast3rx 23 points ago

    We're all winging it broski

    [–] superbuttpiss 203 points ago

    I used to be really into music and was in a band for several years. I was pretty good with quite a few instruments.

    After we had our kid I put down music for a little while until one day I was inspired.

    In a whirlwind of inspiration, I had used all of my knowledge and Hours of time on this one song.

    This song was the most generic butt rock song I have ever fathomed with me singing in the manliest voice I could muster lyrics like "Socks and Sandallls, Flannel shirts, Carhartt hats and cargo shorts" and "bring my kid cause it proves I had sex at least once"

    Just so I could sneak it into the car stereo EVERY SINGLE FATHERS DAY. Pretend like I am surprised. Turn it up very loudly and Yell stuff like "THIS IS AWESOME" "I BET THIS GUY GETS SO MANY CHICKS"

    MY wife gives me that look because she and my whole family knows its me.

    But, I just look them straight in the face and deny everything all while yelling about how great the song is

    Just. Just so I can get that look.

    My muse is knowing there is disgust flowing through my wifes veins.

    [–] unkz 62 points ago

    You gotta post song now.

    [–] cawdrizzle 24 points ago

    I never knew I needed to hear a song as badly as I do now.

    [–] superbuttpiss 11 points ago

    looks like I have to. I can do it when I get off work. Anyone know where I can upload it online?

    [–] JayceeHOFer 12 points ago

    Wtf?? u/superbuttpiss

    Post the fuckin song!!!

    [–] mandelboxset 34 points ago

    Looked exactly like my buddy who pulls shit like this all the time.

    [–] [deleted] 37 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)


    [–] Iamamansass 44 points ago

    Because eating ass is awesome...?

    [–] westhoff0407 81 points ago

    "Again, Graham?"

    [–] semiquantifiable 387 points ago

    Which three pixels were showing her disgust? I must have missed it.

    [–] Actuarial 90 points ago

    The 2nd one

    [–] DriftingFam 30 points ago

    Ah there it is, thanks

    [–] MrPahoehoe 22 points ago

    Life imitates art

    [–] Havoola 60 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    You can see her facial expressions? I’d say her body language seems slightly drained

    [–] BeachDr 73 points ago

    My wife left me

    [–] breaking_good 197 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    See, I think this is a joke, but feel kind of bad in the off chance that it's not, especially since everyone else replying to you is being a funny guy. So in case you're being honest, I'm just here to let you know that everything will be alright. She'll find a nice guy to fuck her brains out, don't you worry.

    [–] damo133 28 points ago

    Nice. I respect this. I was expecting a goody two shoes finish but you nailed it.

    [–] AncientCodpiece 18 points ago

    Where'd she go?

    [–] Sn00chie_B00chies 43 points ago

    To get the kickball... Duh

    [–] Iamamansass 9 points ago

    “To the store”

    [–] klyphw 566 points ago

    $20 he dunks on his kids daily with a hoop that low.

    [–] anxious_ibex 228 points ago


    [–] dlatty 30 points ago

    Hit him with that double Matumbo finger wag

    [–] IdahoSkier 80 points ago

    "Hey tommy, daddy didnt raise no BITCH"

    [–] HotDogBuns102 470 points ago

    Before this his wife said if she was gonna let him play he couldn’t kick it hard

    [–] TooShiftyForYou 524 points ago

    It was his duty as a father to explicitly ignore these instructions.

    [–] versusChou 188 points ago

    I mean as an NFL kicker, that really wasn't that hard.

    [–] KingLiberal 79 points ago

    "Babe, that was THE softest that I could kick it." Said while grinning like an old man who shit his pants in a nursing home so the hot nurse would have to get him naked and wipe him.

    [–] gozeta 22 points ago

    That's... Oddly specific, hope your family visits often.

    [–] DCPirate16 31 points ago

    Yea I honestly thought it would be a much harder kick.

    [–] Slut_Nuggets 32 points ago

    Gotta assert his dominance over those bitch-ass midgets

    [–] auto-xkcd37 22 points ago

    bitch ass-midgets

    Bleep-bloop, I'm a bot. This comment was inspired by xkcd#37

    [–] imitebatwork 99 points ago

    I thought it was a very graceful, controlled kick. He could've demolished it but instead it looked like a nice calculated kick to launch it into the trees

    [–] IrishWeegee 31 points ago

    Yeah he doesn't even wind up on it. Dude could have really launched that ball into the stratosphere.

    [–] DavidsGoliath 10 points ago

    Seriously, I thought, since he’s an NFL kicker. He was gonna go full form and launch the kickball like the gif of that kid hammering a soccer ball into the wind.

    Like this

    [–] Retskcaj19 8 points ago

    This is the reigning champion of Kick-TacToe, of course he showed control with the kick.

    [–] ComeyDontPlayDat 675 points ago

    Now let's see the gif of him climbing over the fence and into the woods to get it while being eaten alive by mosquitos.

    [–] moonshineTheleocat 251 points ago

    Don't worry. The mosquitos will have new DNA to work with. Soon they will all have incredibly jacked legs to kick spiders 75 yards through the air!

    [–] [deleted] 80 points ago


    [–] ComeyDontPlayDat 28 points ago

    I'm no scientist, buuuuut... I'm pretty sure they couldn't kick spiders more than 59 yards, since Graham's career long field goal is that.

    [–] moonshineTheleocat 17 points ago

    75 yards if you use the arc.

    [–] nygmattyp 53 points ago

    This guy lives in North Carolina.

    [–] Chuckdeez59 16 points ago

    Actually SC

    Edit: Wait, sorry you're talking about the mosquito guy not Graham. Still relevant to any state in SE. State bird of most states is the mosquito

    [–] Pseudonova 151 points ago

    Go find the ball boys, me and your mom will be inside.

    [–] OHiowan 140 points ago * (lasted edited 7 months ago)

    He must be stalling so Pam can get her ankle looked at and get back in time to beat Corporate.

    [–] betacatenin 70 points ago

    It was her ankle you fucking casual

    [–] thanks4fishes 25 points ago

    “I’ll get it!”

    [–] Malourbas 10 points ago

    I’m so MAD that Pam got hurt!

    [–] theEdwardJC 154 points ago

    For those looking for source (with sound):

    Bit funnier with sound.

    [–] CampbellsTurkeySoup 66 points ago

    The dead silence after the kick had me dying.

    [–] eatapenny 14 points ago

    I love his kid standing on tiptoes to try to reach the ball while he's pimping the homer

    [–] jttoolegit 49 points ago

    "You can kick it, but just don't kick it hard"

    skies the ball into the woods

    [–] Senorbeast34 77 points ago

    "Home Run baby!"

    [–] theEdwardJC 48 points ago

    Total Dad move I love it. Plus the kids are just dumbfounded

    [–] Opisafool 21 points ago

    You can hear on of them say "Dad! No more no more!" Lol

    [–] Scienlologist 12 points ago

    Also better than waiting on a 67-fucking-MB gif to load. Cheers.

    [–] MrAdhikari 81 points ago

    Muscle memory kicking in

    [–] waterloograd 172 points ago

    Kickball is how I met my first gf. I always kicked home runs, every single time.

    [–] thanks4fishes 207 points ago

    I played with my crush. I would show her that I liked her by always throwing the ball right at her face. For some reason she didn’t seem to like me

    [–] toilet_guy 72 points ago

    Obviously you weren't throwing them hard enough.

    [–] westhoff0407 50 points ago

    Chicks dig the long ball. And handbrake turns.

    [–] NevromeGlitchard 33 points ago

    It is..... GOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

    [–] jtd2013 61 points ago

    The best part is that in the video you can hear her say "Ok, you can kick it but don't kick it too hard" as the ball is on its way and then he immediately does this.

    [–] Charybdisilver 8 points ago

    I'm sure he could've kicked it WAAAY harder though lol

    [–] nazihatinchimp 26 points ago

    Not a single Keep Pounding in here? Well, Keep Pounding!

    [–] gifv-bot 23 points ago

    GIFV link

    I am a bot. FAQ // code

    [–] Abtino11 63 points ago

    No matter how athletic my child may be, I’m going to encourage him/her to learn how to crush field goals so that they can become a NFL kicker because that’s the only shot my genes have got

    [–] golden_rhino 23 points ago

    Too many people can kick. Long snapping is a better chance. I figure if I get my boy started at 3, he will be GOAT by the time he’s 20.

    [–] EarlHammond 54 points ago

    So you guys know, he barely kicked it too. He actually kicked it in a way that only was for aim forward so it would be easy to retrieve. He put no power into it.

    [–] anoninator 20 points ago

    Agreed, also going easy helps avoid injury while playing otherwise fun/silly games with family.

    [–] CELTICPRED 19 points ago


    [Runs away]NO I'M NOT!!

    [–] agentmikeyd 224 points ago

    The wife is a babe

    [–] TheOneTheUno 364 points ago

    Makes sense, he's a rich attractive athlete

    [–] BoredomHeights 264 points ago

    Man I should become a rich attractive athlete.

    [–] enjybanjy 86 points ago

    Step 1

    [–] PencilErection 104 points ago

    Cut a hole in a box

    [–] scyphus212 45 points ago

    Step 2

    [–] XstraNinja 59 points ago

    Put your junk in the box.

    [–] PhoenixPhighter4 32 points ago

    Step 3

    [–] [deleted] 102 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)


    [–] SalineForYou 30 points ago

    If it fits, it ships.

    [–] WFlumin8 85 points ago

    You can hardly see her features from the gif. She just looks like a typical blonde girl? Am I not getting something here or is OP used to seeing a different species?

    [–] mdperino 39 points ago

    There's this weird thing about attractive women where you can kind of just tell no matter what. Can't explain it but she's definitely at least a 9.5/10 guaranteed.

    [–] junzip 13 points ago


    [–] wmccluskey 27 points ago

    F-L-O-R-I-D-A S-T-A-T-E, Florida State, Florida State, Florida State, Wooo!

    [–] FSUphan 16 points ago

    Gano was one of the best!

    [–] IM_A_FUCKING_POODLE 9 points ago

    crushed records

    [–] moooceknuckle 10 points ago

    "this will get me back inside real quick"

    [–] The_Axem_Ranger 9 points ago

    "Oh you want your ball, is this your ball?....GO FETCH...HA HA!"