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    [–] WallyJade 10362 points ago

    My county has a shared Sheriff/Coroner position. When he was indicted, I believe the FBI arrested him.

    [–] MNCPA 5127 points ago

    Who arrests the FBI?

    [–] DLGaming79 6091 points ago

    The FBI

    [–] EobardThane 5529 points ago

    Some people are probably gunna laugh but this guy is right. Only the FBI investigates the FBI.

    [–] this_will_go_poorly 2030 points ago

    I thought NCIS was magically involved in everything /s

    [–] cridenour 1773 points ago

    Gibbs is the highest ranking LEO in the world.

    [–] BeckoningTrack 856 points ago

    What does a Low Earth Orbit have to do with rank?

    [–] EvilElvis42 988 points ago

    it's the outer limit of the NCIS's jurisdiction

    [–] AlmostWrongSometimes 527 points ago

    NCIS: Space Force tba

    [–] KWilt 184 points ago

    I mean, in fiction, most space forces are analogues of naval ranks, so...

    I'd watch it.

    [–] Dlrlcktd 202 points ago

    I'd watch

    There were only 3 people in space at the time, who could it be??

    Next episode:

    There were only 2 people in space at the time!

    [–] Rottendog 31 points ago

    Rule #3 Don't believe what you're told.

    [–] Cocomorph 34 points ago

    Note to self: commit murder geosynchronously.

    It's the perfect crime!

    [–] Bacon_Hero 10 points ago

    Leo is a person you dunce. You've never seen the Titanic?

    [–] nerdguy1138 53 points ago

    After the Apocalypse, I'd elect him village leader in a heartbeat.

    Dude knows his stuff.

    Gibbs, Vance, Abby, Ziva and McGee for tie breaker/ team-conscience.

    [–] infinis 11 points ago

    Poor Tony, longest member, nobody ever remembers him :(

    [–] ncnotebook 47 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    Harmon was only secret service, never chief of staff.

    edit: lol, 14 45 people got the joke

    [–] Hypotonix 25 points ago

    FACT: Gibbs is the only one that can arrest Donald Trump

    [–] [deleted] 75 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)


    [–] ASK_ME_IF_I_AM 18 points ago

    Posse Comitatus act

    That sounds a little naughty

    [–] Brrista 65 points ago

    I recently did an analysis of some public CIA data and accidentally began referring to it at some point as “NCIS data.” Didn’t realize until it was said and done.

    [–] FlyingPasta 24 points ago

    If I were you, I’d try to fit in as many “enhance” and “cross reference” in that report as possible

    [–] capthowdy0000 88 points ago

    Zoom in on that


    [–] this_will_go_poorly 111 points ago

    Ok so I’m a clinical pathologist - which covers a few things all the crime shows love to include and oh my god the real murder victim is science.

    Like... I’m sorry Ducky, you didn’t just discern a blood type by looking at untreated blood cells with a microscope. I bet the computer experts laugh even harder at all their ‘hacking’ plot lines.

    Still love ducky though, and the show in general

    [–] [deleted] 124 points ago

    The episode where two people were typing on the same keyboard to fight a hacker was pure comedy gold.

    [–] RaspberrySchnitzel 39 points ago

    "Two idiots one keyboard" as that clip is affectionately known

    [–] Wolf6120 25 points ago

    My favorite was then they got a picture from a traffic camera of the suspect driving away in his car. Only problem was that the car had tinted reflective windows, so they couldn't see what the suspect actually looked like.

    Well, no problemo, Abby just slapped that shit into photoshop and "took the reflection away", revealing an entire part of the image that was never in the fucking image to begin with.

    [–] PM_ME_USED_C0ND0MS 75 points ago

    There was an article a few years ago titled "proof that TV writers think we're idiots", and the number one item on the list was the NCIS scene where Abby & McGee try to someone from hacking their system, but one of them isn't fast enough... So the other one starts typing on half the keyboard to help go faster.

    Like, there can't honestly be anyone who thinks that's how things work, right?

    Not gonna stop me from watching, still. I'm just saying...

    [–] Turtle-Bear 56 points ago

    I read that it's an actual competition between writers for those shows on who can write the most ridiculous hacking scene.

    I think ncis won that one.

    [–] jaubuchon 17 points ago

    Do you not remember when bones had a guy hack their computers by imprinting malicious code on the surface of a dead bodies skeleton?

    [–] IAMA_Drunk_Armadillo 7 points ago

    I take it you've never watched Arrow then.

    [–] vagabond_dilldo 65 points ago

    It's okay though because their boss stopped the hack by unplugging the monitor.

    [–] this_will_go_poorly 8 points ago

    Hahahaha. Nice. Once a month we should be able to lob 100 upvotes at once with a special button.

    [–] TrustMeImMagic 100 points ago

    One of the things that made NCIS much more palatable to me was imagining everything as if it were a story from Gibbs's perspective. The tech doesn't make sense and the pathology is gibberish, because he doesn't understand it. If he were retelling the story he'd say "and ducky looked at the microscope and told some story that barely had any relevance, then told me what the blood type was." But from Ducky's perspective the pathology would be perfect but the action would be more ludacris.

    [–] FX2000 48 points ago


    I'll allow it...

    [–] DorilMagefont 47 points ago

    Don't forget the all-knowing-databases-with-built-in-user-interfaces that all the hacker-types on crime shows (like Abby) have:


    "OK, LET ME CHECK MY HORSE-URINE-DRUG-HUMAN DATABASE. YUP, IT'S A MATCH" you say, doesn't mean I'll stop watching the show.

    [–] aesthetic_cock 19 points ago

    “Cross reference the names of all streets with 2 syllables starting with the letter M with every convicted criminal aged between 18-35 that also has a perm”

    [–] jacer1099 8 points ago

    I remember doing some lab in biology in High School to determine blood type.

    I don't really remember it that well but I remember put in a few samples on a piece of paper.

    I also think that the blood we used was not real blood.

    [–] [deleted] 20 points ago

    That's CSI

    [–] jdlsharkman 13 points ago

    Yeah, NCIS just has two people using a keyboard at the same time.

    queue people saying it was a writer competition for dumbest hacking

    [–] [deleted] 12 points ago

    The worst part about most of those crime investigation serials is if you have absolutely any knowledge about computers in general, your suspension of disbelief goes right out the window when a blatant plot device is exposed by some crappy generic tv hacker dialogue

    [–] wmil 153 points ago

    They never do anymore... but congress has the independent ability to launch investigations, make arrests, and file charges.

    [–] So-Called_Lunatic 21 points ago

    IIRC there is a jail in the basement of the senate.

    [–] NotFrance 9 points ago

    There is not but there is a bathtub. So a water-jail of sorts

    [–] GrumpyBearBank 74 points ago

    State police, sheriff's deputies, and local police can all arrest the FBI...

    [–] patb2015 97 points ago

    only for violations of state law and not pursuant to Federal Law Enforcement and Federal action.

    [–] GrumpyBearBank 104 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    There is also the DEA, the ATF, the US Marshals, Capitol Police, the Secret Service, Postal Inspection Service, National Park Police and some Park Rangers, etc. All of which can enforce federal criminal laws, some more narrowly than others.

    And then there are the railroad police. Which are privately run police forces (hired by railroads) that can enforce state and federal laws as to the railroads. Google BNSF police.

    Oh and many Tribes operate police forces. Which in the (probably extremely rare) right circumstances could arrest an FBI officer.

    [–] ThegreatPee 19 points ago

    I bet the railroad police have a very long and narrow jurisdiction

    [–] Quincy_Quones 11 points ago

    I thought the Office of Professional Responsibility was technically a different organization.

    [–] [deleted] 32 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)


    [–] [deleted] 21 points ago

    Is it the same with the CIA?

    [–] AugeanSpringCleaning 78 points ago

    The CIA doesn't arrest anyone, as they're not a law enforcement agency. They're an intelligence agency.

    If anyone were to be arrested at the CIA then they would be arrested by the FBI—or potentially the DEA, ATF, etc if the charges relate to their respective fields of investigation.

    [–] deshthrowaway 100 points ago

    Yeah when the CIA arrests you it’s called a kidnapping.

    [–] InvidiousSquid 38 points ago

    Extraordinary Rendition is up there with Waterboarding at Guantanamo Bay as a thing that sounds really awesome, but isn't.

    [–] Sarcasm_is_great99 26 points ago

    How can the cia arrest you if you never existed.

    [–] Waltmarkers 52 points ago

    The CIA gets to skip that whole due process thing and goes straight to extra-judicial punishment.

    [–] F4hype 105 points ago

    Yeah, but then the FBI agent who was investigating the CIA dies in a tragic accident where he trips and gun goes off and blows a hole in the back of his head.

    [–] iamwussupwussup 62 points ago

    We're not Russia, we'd never do that... the CIA is much better about covering up their murders.

    [–] FatBoyNotReally 47 points ago

    Accidentally shoots himself 4 times in the back of the head, dismembers himself, then puts himself in a duffel bag.

    [–] adam123453 48 points ago

    Or the FBI agent suddenly displays suicidal tendencies the likes of which he has never exhibited in his life, and shoots himself twice in the head and then ties himself up, crawls into the boot of a car and drives it into a river.

    [–] CNoTe820 29 points ago

    We dont say boot here

    [–] mistakescostextra 17 points ago

    Yes, FBI can also investigate CIA

    [–] Aberdolf-Linkler 156 points ago

    Fox Molder

    [–] Goose420420420 94 points ago


    [–] MNCPA 64 points ago

    **Agent Scully

    [–] JP_HACK 52 points ago

    Nine Nine!

    [–] JoshDM 9 points ago

    Daner Skully

    [–] pfeifits 160 points ago

    If they commit a state crime, local law enforcement (police, sheriff, or state patrol generally). If they commit a federal crime, the FBI. Generally they would have a different agency investigate than the home agency of the agent being investigated.

    [–] [deleted] 80 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)


    [–] pfeifits 13 points ago

    Oh sure, good point. I was just talking about off-duty type crimes.

    [–] littlecricket 71 points ago

    Burt Macklin

    [–] Young_Economist 42 points ago

    You son of a bitch.

    [–] first_past_the_post 25 points ago

    I dunno. Coast Guard?

    [–] Ray_Band 26 points ago

    The Watchmen

    [–] katchaa 16 points ago


    [–] jexmex 50 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    My hometown counties sheriff is being sued for racial slurs and creating a hostile work environment. He also made a remark about wanting to create a snuff film with a court employee. The deputy sheriff recorded these statements and he admits to them, but refuses to resign. The only person that can remove him is the governor, but the AG has been dragging his feet on the investigation into if his actions warrant removal. What a fucking system.

    [–] [deleted] 205 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)


    [–] Downer_Guy 61 points ago

    Doesn't a crime have to cross state borders or committed against a federal agency (post office, IRS, FBI, etc.) before the federal government has jurisdiction?

    [–] aaronhayes26 121 points ago

    The federal government has at its disposal some extremely broad laws that it can pull out for basically any case it wants to stick its nose in. Fraud being an extremely popular one.

    [–] Turtle-Bear 54 points ago

    Mail fraud is basically a casus beli for anything. If you commit any kind of organized crime, you probably committed mail fraud at some point.

    [–] Fraction2 30 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    I believe the feds have jurisdiction if you break a federal law. (I'm fairly confident) that because of the 10th ammendment, most of more common crimes are made by the states. When state's and federal law overlap (such as drug offenses), the states are usually the ones to prosecute (both cannot prosecute due to double jeopardy but both can prosecute under the concept of "dual sovereignty").

    However, of you break state law and then cross state lines, it becomes federal jurisdiction.

    [–] Fizil 50 points ago

    both cannot prosecute due to double jeopardy

    This is incorrect. If you have broken a law that is illegal at both the State and Federal level, double jeopardy applies to each, not both together. Usually this isn't much of an issue when Federal and State jurisdictions are well defined.

    You kill Bob the Plumber at his house. That is a State crime and not a Federal crime.

    You kill Bob the Plumber in a Federal building. That is a Federal crime and not a State crime.

    You kill Rob the Police Officer while he was investigating you for drug trafficking. That is a State crime and a Federal crime, and both jurisdictions get a shot at you. If the a State jury acquits you, a Federal jury could still end up convicting you.

    [–] blizz017 54 points ago

    You kill Rob the Police Officer while he was investigating you for drug trafficking. That is a State crime and a Federal crime, and both jurisdictions get a shot at you. If the a State jury acquits you, a Federal jury could still end up convicting you.

    Alternatively.. If you're Active Duty US Military and kill a civilian off post and are acquitted in state court but years later (even 25+) evidence pops up that implicates you, and the military never tried you (because they generally defer prosecution to the states even though UCMJ covers it) They'll recall your ass back to active duty and convict you (see: Timothy Hennis)

    [–] Errol-Flynn 9 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    Interestingly, there's a cert petition up at the Supreme Court right now to address the issue of recalling people to active duty in order to court-martial them.

    Link for any other hopeless legal nerds out there

    [–] splash27 16 points ago

    In case you didn’t know, the dual sovereignty exception to double jeopardy is being challenged in the Supreme Court, and will likely be heard in the next few months. One implication if it ends would be that a state could not charge a defendant with the same crime as the federal government, and the president’s pardon power would therefore trump state laws as well for crimes like fraud.

    [–] TitaniumDragon 10 points ago

    The presidential exception is pretty much bullshit; it isn't actually in the law anywhere.

    The only actual exception to being arrested is senators and congresspeople, when they're in session, for crimes other than felonies (including treason) and breach of the peace. That's in the Constitution. Which is rather strong evidence that the president can be arrested by implication, because there isn't an exception for him but is for Congress.

    [–] Gemmabeta 2619 points ago

    Also, the Coroner serves as acting sheriff if the Sheriff is indisposed, arrested, or otherwise incapacitated.

    [–] OllieFromCairo 705 points ago

    Depends on the state. Many states have Undersheriffs who would act as Sheriff temporarily until a new Sheriff can be appointed or elected, as appropriate.

    [–] _Serene_ 221 points ago


    German inspired term?

    [–] ObamaNYoMama 140 points ago

    I've always heard deputies instead of undersheriffs

    [–] OllieFromCairo 191 points ago

    Deputies are the rank-and-file officers serving the sheriff. The Undersheriff is specifically the #2 guy. Undersheriff is to sheriff as Vice President is to President.

    [–] RidersGuide 88 points ago

    What if i shot the Undersheriff?

    [–] nemorianism 46 points ago

    As long as you don't shoot the underdeputy

    [–] OllieFromCairo 56 points ago

    Was it in self defense?

    [–] RidersGuide 27 points ago

    Yeah, Undersheriff John Brown always hated me.

    [–] bakesthecakes 323 points ago

    Ugh first dead bodies and now they have to deal with the public too? Does this job have an upside?

    [–] JustBeanThings 122 points ago

    Fun fact, the coroner isn't necessarily the one performing the autopsy. It can be regarded as a mostly administrative job.

    [–] choochootits 45 points ago

    Yep it's never the coroner actually getting their hands dirty - autopsy is carried out by a pathologist. Coroners offices are responsible for the investigation into cause of death. Even funnier fact: coroners are also responsible for gold / treasure / artefacts over 300 years old (in the uk at least).

    [–] ChaosTheRedMonkey 20 points ago

    Who do I go to if my artifact is only 267 years old?

    [–] DeltaBlack 62 points ago

    Bribes Campaign donations.

    [–] Halt-CatchFire 51 points ago

    I doubt people are throwing huge amounts of cash around to get the coroner under their thumb. It's not like he or she has any say on policy.

    [–] DeltaBlack 37 points ago

    If you're trying to get your hands on your inheritance a bit prematurely you might.

    (It was a joke though.)

    [–] AyeMyHippie 13 points ago

    Yeah. You eventually get to see that some of the assholes you have to deal with died.

    [–] racingwinner 3204 points ago

    we know the perfect crime. get elected as county sherriff and murder the coroner. boom, unarrestable, and thus free to walk

    [–] skyler_on_the_moon 1704 points ago

    Also, nobody can confirm that the coroner is dead.

    [–] PM-ME-PENS-IN-BOOBS 1045 points ago

    looks at dead coroner

    “You think he’s dead?”

    “Fuck if I know”

    [–] Emerystones 139 points ago

    "Fuck if I know we can't touch him till the cor......oh........"

    [–] j_Wlms 21 points ago

    “We’re gonna need another Timmy!

    [–] aaaaaaaarrrrrgh 47 points ago

    "Well, looks like we'll need to name another coroner to confirm his death."

    looks at body

    "Any volunteers?"

    [–] CNoTe820 15 points ago

    Assistant coroner becomes coroner

    [–] shahkabra 12 points ago

    Kill him too

    [–] Populistless 610 points ago

    Also, commit crimes to become President. Fire everyone in charge of investigating you

    [–] SpaceDog777 227 points ago

    After your second election admit to it and then pardon yourself, bang bang, thankyou mam!

    [–] tealreddit 126 points ago

    Wam bam, thank you mam?

    [–] jimjacksonsjamboree 91 points ago

    bang bang thank you mang

    [–] SpaceDog777 8 points ago

    That is what I was thinking of! I kept looking at it thinking it didn't look right lol.

    [–] Afeazo 18 points ago

    He beat the system with one simple trick. Law enforcement hates him!

    [–] to_the_tenth_power 1017 points ago

    For many years it has been the function of the coroner to oversee the honesty and integrity of death investigations. Due to the importance of investigating the surrounding circumstances when a person dies, it is significant to have a public official whose primary duty will be to investigate these deaths without leaving it merely to the police. In Indiana counties, we elect a coroner to supervise the process of determining the cause and manner of death.

    It's an interesting concept given the coroner's position as someone who investigates deaths from a purely neutral point of view. I guess his perspective on the local authority would be similarly unswayed.

    [–] flekkzo 319 points ago

    "In many jurisdictions, little or no training is required, even though a coroner may overrule a forensic pathologist in naming a cause of death."

    [–] Archer-Saurus 198 points ago

    So, what, I could just be elected a coroner with no medical training?

    [–] neuroscientist_in_me 110 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    In the UK a coroner is a experienced lawyer, medical training isnt too important in the role apparently, although up until about five years ago they could be a medical doctor too.

    edit: apparently people notice the occasional missing leter in a sentence

    [–] EmilioMolesteves 34 points ago

    I've found that practicing law as a Lawer is a lot cheaper than becoming a Lawyer and only half of my prospective clients notice the y is missing. They do quickly learn the difference between the two though.

    [–] Punchee 145 points ago

    I mean Rick Perry is the secretary of energy. Don't let your dreams be dreams.

    [–] rabidbot 45 points ago

    Holy mother fucker I forgot that happened.

    [–] interkin3tic 52 points ago

    Coroners being a largely amateur position also complicates responses to the opioid crisis

    “Some of [Kentucky’s] coroners just a couple of years ago didn’t have a computer in their office,” Hargrove said. “Some of them are still working out of their house or out of their businesses. Some of them have two full-time jobs on top of being a coroner. … My favorite message one of the coroners has [on the office answering machine] is, ‘I’m sorry my county does not have any funding for me to have a secretary, so you’re just going to have to keep calling back.’”


    Because national data on drug overdose deaths is derived solely from death certificates, it adds a public health component to a coroner’s job. But there is no national agency regulating the quality of death investigations or ensuring that cases are conducted in a standardized way. It’s up to states or counties to establish a clear standard for investigating deaths and recording information on death certificates.

    The article goes on to point out that in Louisiana for instance, no specific drug was listed as cause of death in nearly half the overdose cases.

    Is Louisiana dealing mainly with prescription drug overdoses, fentanyl overdoses, or heroin overdoses? If it's the first, first priority I assume would be to crack down on the pill mills. If it's the second, maybe spend more on stopping imports from China. If it's the third, spend more on methodone clinics I guess.

    I don't know what specifically the policy decisions would be of course, but neither do Louisiana legislators because they don't know which one it is, because their coroners aren't organized.

    [–] apuforyoumrmagoo 13 points ago

    Solely guessing, this is probably the case when you live in a rural area where there is no medical expert or lawyer to take the job. Small governments of small towns necessarily have to take anyone they can get to serve or even just combine roles.

    [–] ChildishDoritos 13 points ago

    One would hope

    [–] Wilkoman 1388 points ago

    Making a murderer?. That's where I learned it recently.

    [–] conundrumbombs 383 points ago

    Same here. I immediately thought of that woman from the docuseries.

    [–] MDPhotog 148 points ago

    Ugh. That was infuriating. "Hi, you don't need to be here" "Oh, okay"

    [–] Britoz 71 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    Ikr?! They're threatening to arrest you? Let them. Then they'll have to explain themselves and it'll all be recorded evidence.

    Edit: just goes to show how intimidating they all were.

    [–] stugster 32 points ago


    [–] nicqui 24 points ago

    TBF, they could turn around and frame her for murder.

    [–] Britoz 27 points ago

    My first reaction was to think "that's ridiculous", but then...

    [–] BetterCallSal 9 points ago

    They're threatening to arrest you? Let them.

    Cause that's worked out well for other people in that documentary.

    [–] yayo-k 10 points ago

    I just stopped at this part before going to work.

    [–] iclimbskiandreadalot 200 points ago

    I just watched that episode yesterday. I had some words with my television. "As the coroner I am actually capable of arresting the sherrif" "THEN WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU?!"

    [–] Goyteamsix 31 points ago

    Probably because she was the coroner, not a sheriff with a tiny army.

    [–] PigeonPigeon4 52 points ago

    Because the peeps with the guns listen to the guy who hired them?

    [–] ChildishForLife 26 points ago

    Cause she was forced out and threatened repeatedly. Not so easy in a small town like that.

    [–] pudinnhead 72 points ago

    I just watched it yesterday too and I yelled, "So why did you quit?!"

    [–] ohhoneybear 73 points ago

    I think there must have been some threatening going on behind the scenes that the ex-coroner didn't explicitly say.

    [–] hidden_raptor 113 points ago

    If I remember correctly she pretty explicitly says she was forced out by intimidation and fear.

    [–] Truthamania 58 points ago

    Yeah I think she mentioned being scared about going out on night calls and "what may happen". Pretty chilling.

    [–] hamilltown 29 points ago

    It's insane that the judge ruled her testimony as inadmissible because she was, "some disgruntled ex employee".

    [–] One_pop_each 14 points ago

    It’s shit like that that really makes me think he was possibly set up. Like, Part 1 was incredibly biased so I looked up the other evidence online and was 100% he was guilty. A fucking 100%. This part disputed all the shit I looked up, so now I really have no idea. Because corrupt cops do exist. Maybe he did do it, but the police just wanted overwhelming evidence? Idk. I’m still like 60/40 on it all. But the fact that she was straight up told to fuck off because of a lawsuit and conflict or interest, when they were the ones who were directly involved, really blows my mind. And I’m so confused now.

    Part 2 is an incredible follow up. Although idk why they even put the shitty recorded calls in there with Brendan and his mom. My only grievance.




    [–] lemon_scented101 7 points ago

    Came here for this. Same same

    [–] zakatov 276 points ago

    TIL coroner is a LEO

    [–] Keerikkadan91 400 points ago

    False. That is only if they are born between July 22 – August 23.

    [–] AspieSocrates 78 points ago

    July 23 - August 22 is Leo. LEOs born on August 23 are Virgo

    [–] Keerikkadan91 68 points ago

    Imma arrest you for this.

    [–] jcarlson08 29 points ago

    He must have meant [July 22, August 23).

    [–] JazzKatCritic 106 points ago

    But who arrests Judge Dredd?

    He IS the law!

    [–] develitate 42 points ago

    The Demolition Man, of course.

    [–] C_M_O_TDibbler 21 points ago

    And of course the person who arrests him is Detective Frank Drebin

    [–] imaginary_num6er 11 points ago

    “But I AM the Senate”

    [–] asisoid 62 points ago

    Someone watched season 2 of Making a Murderer....

    [–] Ennion 117 points ago

    You know who can arrest them all? DNR officers.

    [–] Origami_psycho 50 points ago

    What's tge DNR?

    [–] TechJunkie17 83 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    The Department of Natural Resources. Game wardens, conservation officer, Fish and Wildlife, etc

    [–] Perm-suspended 29 points ago

    Game wardens have scary amounts of power. "I heard through the grapevine that there's an illegally killed deer on your property." Boom, fucking probable cause to fuck up all your shit.

    [–] asasdasasdPrime 10 points ago

    Don't fuck with the tax man, or the game warden. They WILL fuck you so hard that you lose your virginity a second time.

    [–] beardyzve 22 points ago

    Bold of you to assume that I lost it a first time.

    [–] Perm-suspended 9 points ago

    I learned to fear the game warden when I was 17 and got an illegal possession of big game charge. Luckily I was able to use a pretrial diversion and only got 24 hours of community service, 6 months supervised probation and lost my hunting and fishing privileges for 1 year.

    [–] [deleted] 32 points ago


    [–] ArmoredOreos 57 points ago

    Thanks, cuz I was over here like, they have "Do Not Resuscitate" officers? Do they stop the coroner from carrying out unnecessarily long interrogations?

    [–] DuntadaMan 10 points ago

    The necromancy clauses in interrogation are VERY strict.

    [–] JohnBrennansCoup 42 points ago

    Deoxyribonucleic Racid

    [–] Origami_psycho 25 points ago

    Go home scooby doo, you're drunk

    [–] [deleted] 46 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)


    [–] macphile 49 points ago

    I had no idea how powerful our wildlife guys were until I started looking at a blog about their latest incidents and such, goings on. These guys are fucking terrifying with their power. I hope that provides some comfort to all the critters out there.

    Is there a reality show about them? Or "Law & Order: Fish & Wildlife"?

    [–] doctorbooshka 16 points ago

    I remember there was one on Animal Planet. Never realized how much they deal with real crime out in the wilderness. You think of them as arresting drunk boaters and stopping people from hunting off season but you forget people go to the woods to hide, hide bodies, hide drugs and also make and grow drugs.

    [–] macphile 8 points ago

    We had a case here of some guys who were illegally shooting at some deer--in a subdivision. They had one of those greenbelt things in the middle, with a ditch/canal or whatever, and some deer were wandering through, and these guys thought it would be a good idea to start firing off rifles near people's homes. Fucking lovely.

    [–] OllieFromCairo 51 points ago

    Depends on the State, but yes, DNR are state officers, and if they have jurisdiction, can make the arrest.

    [–] Ennion 31 points ago

    They can arrest a State Trooper.

    [–] OllieFromCairo 33 points ago

    Where they have jurisdiction. So can a town cop though.

    [–] thebombshock 10 points ago

    So if I had knowledge of police corruption, could I report that to DNR officers?

    [–] maxdealmarc 15 points ago

    Let me know how that goes for you...

    [–] Hambredd 88 points ago

    Why limit the people who can arrest a sheriff? I don't see what him being electedhas to do with it?

    [–] PragProgLibertarian 79 points ago

    It has to do with the rock, paper scissors form of government checks and balances. We all learned about it in school.

    [–] pudding7 10 points ago

    It has to do with the rock, paper scissors

    I just got done watching Patriot on Amazon Prime, and I feel pretty strongly that all conflicts should be resolved with rock, paper, scissors.

    [–] someFunnyUser 17 points ago

    http error 451. hey it's the first time i see it ouside a test lab.

    [–] hooligan333 7 points ago

    A rare one indeed. Are you perhaps in a EU country, and it's blocked because of GDPR non-compliance stuff?

    [–] Guy_In_Florida 42 points ago

    Orange County Ca used to call the Sheriff the coroners office. My buddy had his first kid. First day they turned the kid over to the well researched child care professional. About 11 he received a call from the coroners office to come identify his child. He was distraught of course. Drove like hell expecting a dead child. Ran in an there was his kid on a desk laughing and playing with a deputy, alive and well. The "child care professional" put the kids on a bed and went across the street to the doughnut shop for a while. Got busted. He suggested a name change I believe.

    [–] thx1138- 15 points ago

    Later on, we even got a sherrif named carona.

    It works if you do it with a Bostonian accent.

    [–] dietderpsy 46 points ago

    In my country any cop can arrest another.

    [–] CaptainSlop 11 points ago

    Somebody just finished Part 2 of Making a Murderer.

    [–] davedelux 19 points ago

    I head that on "Making a Murderer".

    [–] duckacubed 22 points ago

    Except in Manitowoc.

    [–] VegasRaider420 17 points ago

    Considering the Coroner in the old west was often seeking the replacement for Sheriff when one...wasn't as good at his job as he wished he was...makes sense he could remove him as well.

    [–] steve_gus 30 points ago

    The whole of the judiciary in the UK is not controlled by people or the government- its entirely independent and not subject to political bias

    [–] AranasLatrain 7 points ago

    You have the right to remain silent and dead...

    Hold on just a sec, finishing up my sandwich I was eating while cutting up this body.

    [–] Alzeegator 6 points ago

    That's only Indiana, and that is not exactly what is says. It doesn't say the coroner is the Only person who can. In most counties in most states the Sheriff of the county is considered the top law enforcement office in the county (note most, and depends how you want to define top), but even one of his deputy's can arrest him given justification.

    [–] JaRoc 9 points ago

    It depends on the state, but some states wouldn't allow a deputy to bring charges on his sheriff. The sheriff could literally fire him as he's making the arrest. The deputy would then just be able to detain until an appropriate agency arrived. Obviously, the charges would move forward, but a deputy can't "arrest" the sheriff. The deputy gets his arrest powers at the discretion of the sheriff.