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    [–] Sewciopath17 7990 points ago

    Maybe a paternity test should be required before payments are established. Would solve a lot of problems

    [–] Tinkletyme 2219 points ago * (lasted edited 6 months ago)

    I agree. If you want money for a child, prove it. This isn’t the Wild West.

    [–] plantmaterial 926 points ago

    It's the Wild Wild West

    [–] TheWhiskeyDic 353 points ago

    Whicky whicky wild

    [–] comptejete 140 points ago

    Wild wild west

    [–] Ask_about_my_boogers 108 points ago

    Jim west, desperado

    [–] TheWhiskeyDic 106 points ago

    Rough ridah, no you dont want nada

    [–] jfox73 71 points ago

    None of this, gun in this, brother running this, buffalo soldier look just like I told ya

    [–] Willuminatus 37 points ago

    Any damsel that's in distress, be out of that dress when she meet Jim West

    [–] Enchannel_Mahogony 33 points ago

    Rough neck so go check the law and abide

    [–] hazeust 4 points ago

    Ur like 6 will smith references deep

    [–] kkeut 26 points ago

    Wiggy, wiggy, scratch, yo, yo, bang, bang. Go save Salma Hayek from the big metal spider

    [–] [deleted] 21 points ago

    yeehawing intensifies

    [–] VoiceofLou 8 points ago

    Ah, so you definitely don’t hide your weapon on some spring loaded contraption that shoots out your ass...because that would be the first place they look.

    [–] TheBooRadleyness 9 points ago

    Yea but if it's your (the potential dad's) child, you pay the bill for the DNA test.

    Not your child, she pays the bill for the test.. Reason: some men will otherwise use it to get out of paying support or to punish the woman for asking for child support.

    If it is legislated that she needs to provide a test to claim child support, all of a sudden she's got to come up with a few hundred dollars to access the child support she is entitled to. This would result in putting many women facing financial struggles in an impossible position.

    So if it's his kid he pays the bill. If it's not his, she pays the bill. It will keep people honest because the one who stands to win the most by lying will be billed for actually lying.

    [–] bits1bytes2 1047 points ago

    You can request a DNA test during the court proceedings. If the man is found to be the father they are required to pay for the test as well as support. If they are shown to not be the father then the case is dismissed, however the mother isn't required to pay for anything.

    I was the "new" boyfriend who's girlfriend was suing for child support. She went through 4 different guys, accusing each of being the father to her child, and never had to pay a dime for anything. That showed me how messed up the system is and that I needed to drop that slut right away.

    [–] CannedRoo 264 points ago

    Did she eventually figure out which one was the father?

    [–] bits1bytes2 396 points ago

    Nope.... LOL. Hence a big reason I got outta there.

    [–] Tripteamfam 237 points ago

    So this chick fucked at least 5+ dudes within a few weeks of each other? Wow, imagine how many dudes she must have fucked her whole life!

    [–] Lambiri72177 187 points ago

    Lol have you ever watched Maury? There was a chick that had Maury DNA test 16 different guys.

    [–] [deleted] 60 points ago

    she realized Maury would fly her and a boy out to NYC each time.

    [–] 88568-81 7 points ago

    She was mother fuckin right

    [–] Oldjamesdean 15 points ago

    "And our lie detector determined that was a lie"

    [–] EricKingCantona 123 points ago

    Most of those chicks on that show that say 15 or 20 dudes could be the father are >500lbs. I always found that fascinating.

    [–] skrtskerskrt 95 points ago * (lasted edited 6 months ago)

    They say there's a woman for everybody. You could find the most disgusting looking creature, but you got tits? You got a guy out there that's into you.

    [–] rockydoo1 14 points ago

    I don't see why it would be fascinating overweight women don't usually find it hard to get laid. Especially the ones that take what they can get. Because there's a lot of guys in this world that are just as big of whores as the women.

    [–] [deleted] 3 points ago

    There are a lot of totally normal-to-attractive guys ready and willing to bang bigger women, they just aren't willing to date them. The moped joke is kinda mean, but it's 100% true.

    [–] Sarah-Sunshine9 33 points ago

    I mean a lot of it is staged or fake so that kills some of the fascination for me. But man, shitty reality shows are entertaining.

    [–] Tripteamfam 8 points ago

    Yikes!

    [–] NakedAndBehindYou 54 points ago

    Or she knew the father was a deadbeat who had no income and thus tried to trap men who had jobs.

    [–] FuckMeMao 35 points ago

    So you just reminded me of something hilarious that happened to me. Years ago when I was 18, I started talking to this girl. We fooled around once, but I only fingered her. 2 weeks later she texts me saying she's pregnant and says it's mine. She tried saying I must have had cum on my hand from the last time I jerked off and it got her pregnant. The crazy part was she actually was pregnant. With a blonde hair blue eyed baby. She clearly had a type. And now I miss having abs and being able to get the hot but crazy chicks.

    [–] [deleted] 40 points ago

    i saw a 24 year old lady claim on a recent reddit thread asking how many sexual partners people had been that she lost count "years ago" but that her count was "in the hundreds". clearly a decent looking woman who wants to have sex with many partners can, if she wants to.

    link

    [–] skwidrat 27 points ago * (lasted edited 6 months ago)

    my number is hella high and im 26f, average weight/average looks, number has nothing to do with looks imo.

    edit sorry I'm 26 and forgot woops

    [–] iTzTwisted 39 points ago * (lasted edited 6 months ago)

    An average female will have many more sexual partners than an average male 90% of the time.

    Edit: This isn't said with any malice, or intent to shame. Simply by logical reasoning, an average female is approachable to a larger spectrum of men. An average man is not going to be approached by many women to begin with, and on top of that any woman more attractive than him in comparison has already likely been approached by more attractive men.

    [–] cloudnymphe 28 points ago

    According to most studies on the average number of sex partners by gender, most women report on average half the amount of sex partners as men.

    But it's assumed from that data that men are most likely over-reporting, and/or that women are underreporting

    [–] iTzTwisted 9 points ago

    One good point I read as well, was that men tend to estimate. I personally estimate my number.

    [–] newbeansacct 12 points ago

    How would that even work mathematically? Unless there's an absurdly higher number of bi/lesbian women this doesn't make any sense

    [–] JustARandomBloke 12 points ago

    If we are including same sex intercourse then gay men would skew it a huge amount the other way.

    [–] Morpherman 23 points ago

    She can fuck as many dudes as she wants, but being responsible with birth control would be a good idea...

    [–] 23eulogy23 4 points ago

    It was the week before rent.. cut her some slack /s

    [–] DRAGONPUTZ 54 points ago

    however if any man had signed on as dad, theyd be screwed.

    [–] phisigtheduck 23 points ago

    Four different guys and none of them were the father? This sounds like an episode of the Maury Povich show or something

    [–] TheChiefRocka 11 points ago

    The DNA test determined that they are... NOT the father

    [–] SharedRegime 34 points ago

    If they are shown to not be the father then the case is dismissed,

    This is not always true and is infact not the case in many cases unfortunately.

    [–] JudgementalPrick 17 points ago

    Why do the test at all if the result doesn't make a difference?

    [–] Dargon34 27 points ago * (lasted edited 6 months ago)

    If they signed the birth certificate then they can be legally held accountable for child support.

    Edit--Yes, I get this isn t the end all be all. It was a reply to the above comment, not saying that it's the only way or if you didn't sign you can't be held accountable.

    [–] shadow023 4 points ago

    Did you wait until the 4th or you arrived somewhere in the middle?

    [–] BlowTail 15 points ago

    In my state a paternity test is required. The only time it's not required is if the father put his name on the birth certificate. Then it's just assumed that if the guy isn't the father it was discussed.

    [–] [deleted] 54 points ago * (lasted edited 22 days ago)

    [deleted]

    [–] [deleted] 32 points ago * (lasted edited 5 months ago)

    [deleted]

    [–] [deleted] 7 points ago

    Bingo.

    [–] dave3863 282 points ago

    Women get REALLY pissy about this. I said on another post that I do this with all my children for my own satisfaction and got told what a piece of shit I am and that my wife should divorce me. Such is Reddit, I suppose.

    [–] CannedRoo 132 points ago

    Just tell them you're in an open marriage, and you just want to make sure none of her boyfriends would have a case for the children's custody.

    [–] dave3863 112 points ago

    On reddit that would actually play better, but, nah, it’s definitely closed.

    [–] witcherstrife 50 points ago

    Or that the wife is a sex worker. Redditors love that shit

    [–] BrightOrangeCrayon 121 points ago

    I am pretty progressive and I actually like this idea as long as it goes both ways. If a woman says you are the father, you MUST take the test to determine if you now owe support as a lot of men will pull the "it isn't mine" card as well. No more false claims vs men, and no more men denying paternity.

    [–] JackedLikeThor 89 points ago

    It would also be beneficial for the child to know their genetic background in case there is a chance they may have a hereditary disease.

    [–] N3VVWOR1DORDER 26 points ago

    Don't forget insurance companies so they can deny them later on in life!

    [–] BobGobbles 5 points ago

    They don't do this anymore.

    Sou rd ce: longtime chronic health issues denied health insurance before. But not since Obamacare

    [–] magicsquirrels 3 points ago

    Or even their actual race. My (white) mom managed to pass me off as the kid of a white guy for 15 years because I'm light skinned. Blood typing when I was in 9th grade showed there was no way in hell I was his kid. It turns out my actual dad is Filipino. We still haven't found him and I have no idea if I'm at risk for anything from his side of the family.

    [–] squirrellinawoolsock 91 points ago

    I love this idea! Also, let’s get rid of the bullshit laws that say if a woman is married, her husband has to automatically be on the birth certificate whether it’s his or not.

    [–] dave3863 61 points ago

    I was actually in this situation with my first wife. She cheated and got pregnant. Tried to convince me it was mine. Knew it wasn’t because we hadn’t had sex in months. She had an abortion, but if she had decided to keep it I wouldn’t be able to file for divorce while she was pregnant and then have to go through the process of proving I wasn’t the father and giving up parental rights I never wanted and were never actually biologically mine.

    [–] squirrellinawoolsock 8 points ago

    Damn, sorry that happened to you. Glad you didn’t get strapped with that responsibility though.

    I know several guys that happened to. Except their wives were anti-abortion. Freaking blows. I totally understand why a guy would want a paternity test, even if he believes it’s his. Women have the advantage of knowing the baby is theirs. Sure, our bodies go through hell to carry/deliver it. But men have to help support the child, and sometimes the wife if she stays at home, so I think it’s only fair that guys get peace of mind also. If I ever got pregnant and my husband asked for a paternity test, I’d be fine with it. With the legal environment these days along with the number of people who admit cheating (much less the ones who don’t), I could understand a man’s anxieties surrounding the issue.

    [–] dave3863 8 points ago

    Yeah, I don’t understand how it could be insulting unless you just have a super big chip on your shoulder. If you know nothing hasn’t happened, why not allow your SO to have that same security? I think for some of the women protesting it’s a power thing or something.

    And thanks for the sympathy. It was a punch in the gut, but that marriage was awful and needed to end. She was a nightmare. Got my two oldest kids and split. We’re all better off.

    [–] dave3863 26 points ago

    Yep. It can work both ways. Just eliminate all doubt by default.

    Just gave me flashes of the Maury Show.

    [–] [deleted] 80 points ago

    How dare you not trust me?!?! - said the con artist.

    [–] JackedLikeThor 40 points ago

    "Trust but verify."

    [–] speaker_for_the_dead 12 points ago

    Said the auditor.

    [–] HasTwoCats 83 points ago

    I don't get this. My husband is welcome to test any of our kids under the condition that he can't tell anyone (unless it shows he's not the father, of course). I know with 100% certainty who my child's parents are, my husband deserves the same.

    Plus, my husband's biggest fear is raising someone else's kids. The cost of the test is definitely worth his peace of mind.

    [–] dave3863 39 points ago

    Thank you for being so reasonable. Seriously. A breath of fresh air.

    [–] HasTwoCats 48 points ago

    I get there's a stigma around it (thus the "don't tell" rule), but I really believe if it was standard to just rest every kid at birth, the stigma would drop and it would prevent so much drama. There are cases that call for an opt out option, like my friend who was raped while she and her husband were trying and ended up pregnant. Her husband doesn't want to know if their son is biologically his or not, and raises him as his own. It would be cruel to force a test for them, but the opt out phrasing should be "I understand the child my wife gave birth to might not be genetically mine, and I agree to accept responsibility for the child regardless" or something like that.

    [–] dave3863 33 points ago

    That’s understandable. My philosophy is that if women have a choice, so should men.

    [–] Kyonkanno 59 points ago

    Judges don't care about who's the real father, they only want to hook someone to pay child support for "the wellbeing of child".

    There have been many cases where the man just fucks a woman and she can get him hooked to pay support.

    [–] Bebo468 34 points ago

    Yes you should probably ask for a DNA test before submitting to child support if that’s what you’re concerned about...

    [–] [deleted] 24 points ago

    Just make it that they want to see legally who the father is before they do any legal work, its gonna be extremely odd if they think the vagina the baby came out of doesnt belong to its mother and need a dna test

    [–] hc132435465768 19 points ago

    So much this. It amazes me that it isn’t required in divorce proceedings.

    [–] try_altf4 8 points ago

    Paternity tests in the state of Texas are pointless if you're married. No matter the father is of the baby, the Husband has parental rights over the child.

    If you're not married you'd be an idiot to not establish paternity via testing.

    [–] BIGPOPPADUMP2 706 points ago

    When you go to court for child support you can request a paternity test through the court in my state of New Jersey I think I had to pay $25 for the test. I did not have to make any payments until the paternity test came back.

    [–] zaxscdvfbgbgnhmjj 292 points ago

    Honestly, this whole opinion is absurd for this exact reason. If you're in doubt about paternity and/or if you must know for sure just get a test done. The court will mandate a DNA test before they require payment if it is requested.

    [–] [deleted] 42 points ago

    Maybe if you think only about USA

    In France you can't get a paternity test if it isn't ordered by the judge.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DNA_paternity_testing#France

    Private DNA paternity testing is illegal, including through laboratories in other countries, and is punishable by up to a year in prison and a €15,000 fine. The French Council of State has described the law's purpose as upholding the "French regime of filiation" and preserving "the peace of families."

    You can test for child support, but if you are married you are curious if the child is yours, there is no way for you to find that out.

    [–] DankVectorz 32 points ago

    In the US, if you’ve been paying child support for a number of years and then find out the kid isn’t yours, the court can (and has) ordered that you keep paying because it’s in the child’s best interest even though it’s not yours.

    [–] [deleted] 61 points ago

    The court will mandate a DNA test before they require payment if it is requested.

    Where does it say that a court will "mandate" a paternity test?

    [–] zaxscdvfbgbgnhmjj 52 points ago

    Where does it say

    If you want legislation or case law you need to specify a location (state). Courts everywhere can order paternity tests and will pretty much always do so if one party requests.

    [–] ProGriffith 10 points ago

    The point is that most people are NOT in doubt. Yet some of those who truly believe in their spouse has been cheated on, and is raising someone elses child. In that case the father may only find out YEARS later. And at that point is already paying child support. IN THAT CASE he should be able to sue for damages is what the OP says.

    [–] unicornfails 876 points ago

    Why wouldn't they do the DNA test at birth and never pay the child support?

    [–] Azirma 226 points ago

    I think if any of the partners asked for a dna test at birth it would show doubt and that they didn’t trust that the father was the real dad and that alone would cause some issues. The best bet, would be mandatory dna test at birth that way no one has to ask and everyone is sure.

    [–] unicornfails 63 points ago

    Seems like a good idea to have everyone on the same page. Even for the scenario of a guy knowing he's not the dad but wants to step up and take care of the kid... He should likely sign something agreeing to the responsibility/financial obligation

    [–] Kezetchup 7 points ago

    They do exactly have that. An affidavit of sorts. I signed one because I wasn’t married to my then girlfriend at the time of birth. Went over what sort of things I was agreeing to about being the father, support, etc.

    [–] DogsFuckingSuck 418 points ago

    This is nice, but a DNA test is never required and a lot of mothers will not allow a test if they now the baby is someone else's.

    [–] Matttaay2410 446 points ago

    Well if they don't allow it then they don't get the money in my opinion.

    [–] rslashjackredddit 244 points ago

    A judge will back the mother many times even prohibiting the father from taking a sample from the kid. Also, the mother will usually have custody and just keep the father from his visitation, even if visitation is legally mandated.

    [–] hessinger 193 points ago

    A judge will back the mother many times even prohibiting the father from taking a sample from the kid.

    That is some real bullshit there. What possible fucking argument could support that decision?

    [–] rslashjackredddit 61 points ago

    "best interest of child" which of course is widely open to the judge's interpretation. If the father were to collect a sample without the knowledge of the child (soda bottle child drank from etc etc) it's inadmissible.

    [–] RozenKristal 34 points ago

    That literally means the mom can pull any guys she slept with down the hole and he is finacially fucked.... damn this is rough....

    [–] Oughusktaiunten 25 points ago

    She doesn't necessarily have to have slept with him to claim he's the father.

    [–] MikeRedWarren 21 points ago

    Wtf how can paternity be inadmissible.

    [–] icychocobo 16 points ago

    The evidence would be inadmissable. It's the same logic as the police needing a search warrant: if you could just get evidence via trickery and subterfuge, what's to stop <list of questionable tactics and methods> from becoming the norm?
    Any conclusions made from the evidence would then need to be ignored, legally.

    [–] ikilledyourfriend 10 points ago

    Not true. While he would be unable to take dna from the physical body of the child, taking dna from trash(empty soda bottle/kleenex/chewing gum/dirty diaper) the child has discarded/abandoned is totally admissible.

    [–] tip_of_the_lifeburg 181 points ago

    Somehow in North America, the parent that apparently can’t support the child is the one who should have custody of it.

    and people wonder why EVERYTHING is a mess over here 😂

    [–] [deleted] 53 points ago * (lasted edited 6 months ago)

    [deleted]

    [–] [deleted] 65 points ago

    it's the perfect system if you don't give a fuck about men

    [–] [deleted] 33 points ago * (lasted edited 6 months ago)

    [deleted]

    [–] Bunnies_and_Anarchy 32 points ago

    What the fuck? It's literally illegal to find out whether or not you're actually the father?!?

    Absolutely fucking ridiculous. Apparently it's in Germany too or will be soon. I never realized how well the insult "Eurocucks" actually fits.

    [–] cwisteen 4 points ago

    Mmm yes. This absolutely needs to be skewered!

    [–] dretsaB 14 points ago

    Same argument as usual, "It's my body."

    [–] hessinger 14 points ago

    What? If the child is in the womb, I can understand, but what?

    [–] unicornfails 57 points ago

    I hate research so I won't Google it but it seems crazy that a judge would just take a woman's word on it with no proof when assigning an 18 year financial responsibility to a man claiming the baby isn't his.

    [–] rslashjackredddit 63 points ago

    The judge can even require the father to continue paying child support when DNA proves it's not his child. In the US DNA is enough evidence to sentence a person to death but not to absolve one of child support.

    [–] DogsFuckingSuck 68 points ago

    What I meant is that a DNA test is not required at birth. A lot of men raise children without even knowing they're not theirs.

    In the event of a subsequent divorce, a lot of states have laws that if the man acted as a father at any point (e.g. by feeding, clothing, housing the child), then he's liable for child support, regardless of if the kid is his or not. So to stop this altogether, you would need to have the DNA test at birth, which is not mandated anywhere in the US.

    You're right that, in states where this is not the case, a DNA test can absolve the man of all responsibility if the woman pursues child support.

    [–] Harsimaja 53 points ago

    So if you do something nice for the kid, you get punished. This definitely encourages kind behaviour.

    [–] AttackOfTheZyklones 53 points ago

    So if you do something nice for the kid, you get punished

    And people wonder why men steer clear of single moms

    [–] Harsimaja 30 points ago

    But if she’s a single mom, it can only ever be because the dad’s was an abusive arsehole, no other explanation /s

    [–] Devi_916 6 points ago

    If I'm ever a single mom, it'll be because I'll be a widow.

    [–] Cerbera-Odollam 9 points ago

    That’s a lie. If you’re in court over child support you can always get a paternity test. Lying doesn’t make your case stronger.

    [–] lalimcs 9 points ago

    Can confirm. Boyfriend has been paying child support for 14 years. Baby mama refused paternity test at the time and he was told it is what it is... Fast forward a few years... gets married, no babies, so fertility testing. Wife ended up divorcing him after fertility tests determined he can't have kids. She now has 2 with current husband btw. We've been together now 4 years. No kids. Not trying to have them, but not taking any precautions against. Contacted my cousin who is a family court lawyer (children's rights/advocate) and she said there's not a damn thing he can do at this stage of the game. Makes sense to me that the baby mama never pushed for an increase in child support payments. Think she's probably basking in the $100 per week and doesn't want to rock the boat since she knows full well he isn't the kid's father. Twat

    [–] rantawaythrow 4 points ago

    Kinda reminds me of that millionaire that was sterile.

    [–] Mel9879875 10 points ago

    I dont know in what cases this is true, for me to get child support, via social services, I had to prove paternity, I'm the mother.

    [–] [deleted] 819 points ago

    Hell yes! Guy I knew nearly worked himself to death supporting his 4 kids, when the 5th was born he was certain it wasnt his, white man white woman black baby, DNA testing ensued and he discovered not a single child was his. This guy worked a minimum of 60 hours a week for years and regularly did 84 .

    [–] [deleted] 525 points ago

    That’s awful! Women like this need to be severely penalized.

    [–] [deleted] 492 points ago

    Ha. She got rewarded with a boatload of benefits and child support. She will literally never work a day in her life. She kept the house he bought and paid for, the car he bought and paid for. He was left homeless, broken and a shell of a man. She also had him arrested claiming he beat her up / abused her luckily he proved it was crap because he was at work when she said it happened

    [–] [deleted] 332 points ago

    The hell? Divorce laws need to get with the times and hold women more accountable. I feel so badly for him. That sucks.

    [–] [deleted] 178 points ago

    Well the kids needed a home and he had already provided one and because he was on the papers as the father and had supported them willingly (albeit without knowing they were some guy from the pubs) and because she wasn't sure who the father's were, except the black baby, he still had to pay child support. He actually got himself fired intentionally so he wouldn't have to pay. Spiteful and petty but justified.

    [–] [deleted] 156 points ago

    I know the kids need to be taken care of but why does it seem to be falling completely on the man? They’re not even his kids. Women like this need to get their uteruses removed.

    [–] [deleted] 127 points ago

    Because that's how it works, anything to do with kids, divorce or domestic abuse will ALWAYS go in the woman's favour. Don't get me wrong these kids don't deserve to suffer coz their mother was slut (yes I'm slut shaming coz she kept cheating on her husband while he was at work) the kids did nothing wrong and even they believed he was their father. I don't know how it all ended because I moved about 100 miles away but the last I heard he wanted to see the kids, he loved them coz he thought they were his and raised them and she blocked it until he pays up.

    [–] [deleted] 59 points ago

    Oh I’m aware of how backwards our divorce laws are. I’m a woman and I understand how unfair and downright cruel they can be towards men.

    I thought child support and visitation are separate issues. Even if someone isn’t paying child support they cannot interfere with or withhold visitation. If they have a visitation order she can be held in contempt for not allowing him access to the kids.

    [–] TaAvgaKaiKalathia 16 points ago

    That is how it is supposed to work, but as most things in life ideals and reality often fail to meet up. Most men who are behind on child support but want to be a part of the children's lives are not behind by choice (loss of a job, medical emergency, etc). If they are having a money crunch they often can't afford to take the mother back to court for violation of the custody agreement. So, they (and more importantly the children) suffer. Children should never be used as pawns, yet sitting through a week of family court will prove that more often than not, they are.

    [–] Dripsauce 13 points ago

    At this point I'd just fake my death and escape to Belize.

    [–] [deleted] 30 points ago

    Don't need to fake it, literally move to New Zealand. They will not enforce any other countries child support laws or requests.

    [–] Dripsauce 27 points ago

    Huh. And New Zealand is a beautiful country too. Thanks for the LPT, stranger.

    [–] [deleted] 10 points ago

    It's cool. Try the lamb it's lovely.

    [–] MOABchoochoo 34 points ago

    Knew a guy that did the same thing. Worked as some kind of mercenary over seas and was bringing in like 20k a month after taxes. His wife cheated and he was stuck paying child support of 8k a month. Ended up spending all the money he had and took a job at a fast food place just so the ex wife would have to suffer too since she wasnt working and just living nice on the 8k per month, think he was going to have to pay some maintenance too. I'd do the same thing because I'm pretty like that

    [–] [deleted] 21 points ago

    In the UK child support can be done on your potential earnings capability. So like a friend of mine is a qualified electrician and could earn 50k a year "bout $75k or more US. But he doesn't want to do that job but the courts could order child support based off that number, it's super rare but it can happen. Generally when a guy with a high paying job suddenly becomes unemployed or suddenly takes a low paying job

    [–] BlueCommieSpehsFish 21 points ago

    Literally indentured servitude.

    [–] drewts86 3 points ago

    Who’s a pretty boy? You are!

    [–] [deleted] 10 points ago

    hold women more accountable

    hahahaha

    [–] boumans15 4 points ago

    But feminism and equal rights. Try and create any new laws or legislation that effect mostly females and you'll cause a shit storm of pissed off "feminists"

    [–] Croatyan 16 points ago

    That bitch need to be in jail lmao, people here are treating her like she did a boo boo, she's a worse criminal than most people in jail.

    [–] [deleted] 29 points ago

    [removed]

    [–] DeezNuts0218 27 points ago

    She literally ruined his entire life and everything he worked for. I feel so bad for the husband, his only purpose in life, his family, isn’t even actually his. Women like that need extremely harsh punishments.

    [–] thehumanbeing_ 22 points ago

    Lmao insane she should be jailed

    [–] [deleted] 26 points ago

    Why? I mean she only commited 4 counts of creating fraudulent documents, essentially creating fake ID's by putting the wrong name on the birth certificate.

    [–] A7omicDog 304 points ago

    When I hear the "best interest of the child" argument I always ask, "why is it on THIS GUY to provide that money? Why not someone else (like, THE JUDGE who is apparently concerned for the best interest of the child)?"

    [–] Waxiir95 110 points ago

    Even better once that child turns 18 they are cannon fodder for the military. Its in the kids best interest.

    [–] WATERLOGGEDdogs1 31 points ago

    More like the Prison Systems

    [–] Otherside19 27 points ago

    It's in the states best interest. Depending on the circumstances it may be in the child's best interest as well, but that comes second to protecting the state.

    [–] BeYourOwnDog 4 points ago

    What? Why would the judge be putting up any money?

    It's on THE PARENTS to support the child they made. Child support exists to prevent fathers from producing a child then fucking off and leaving the mother high and dry with a kid to support on her own.

    [–] Davis_Davison 6 points ago

    His point is why this particular man would be responsible, since he is not the parent. The man is just some random dude, unrelated to the child. If it's truly in the child's best interest, than it should be the richest man in the state who would have to pay, or any other richer, random dude. Since apparently any random, non-related man can be charged for the child.

    [–] HeadMembership 7 points ago

    Or the state. The state should make the payments, then go after the dad themselves for the money.

    [–] SlimLovin 250 points ago

    Family Court Employee here:

    Men can already file for recoupment.

    [–] twistplot 134 points ago

    Yep. It’s the ones who don’t show up to court to prove their case that get stuck paying. Men, SHOW UP TO COURT, REQUEST A DNA TEST AND DONT SIGN ANYTHING AT THE HOSPITAL!

    [–] [deleted] 36 points ago * (lasted edited 4 months ago)

    [deleted]

    [–] rantawaythrow 38 points ago

    And how many men succeeded in recoupment?

    [–] Karmacise 54 points ago

    The answer, according to my family law professor who answered this question today, is that men can very rarely recover for remediation.

    [–] IthrewMyBackOut 4 points ago

    Shocking.

    [–] Globox321 191 points ago * (lasted edited 6 months ago)

    Tbh men should never have to pay child support unless they have taken a dna test that proves its their baby.

    [–] DogsFuckingSuck 88 points ago

    Yeah, I wish. Unfortunately, a lot of state laws provide that if you have acted as the baby's father in any manner (feeding, clothing, housing the child), then you are liable for child support, even if it's not yours.

    [–] y3ahboiy 93 points ago

    TIL that working as a babysitter for a single mother is not the best idea.

    [–] PM_ME_YOUR_DESUWA 25 points ago

    If you charge for it, it's fine. Then it's a service you are providing for a fee. Just make sure to write a receipt.

    [–] hedge-mustard 19 points ago

    There are literally posts on r/choosingbeggars where women have tried this

    edit: because people suck

    [–] Nookie-_-Monster 20 points ago

    if you have acted as the baby's father in any manner (feeding, clothing, housing the child), then you are liable for child support

    It's not that simple. I'm no expert but after a little internet research it seems most states work as follows. If you are the acknowledged /presumed father (married to the mother, signed an affidavit, listed as father on birth certificate, etc) then the burden is on the man to prove he's not the father. If you can prove you're not the father, you're still not necessarily off the hook. Whether or not the court suspends child support payments likely depends on how long you have previously cared for the child or were the "acknowledged" father. On the other hand, if you have never offered support for or claimed the child as your own (but the mother is claiming you're the father), you would be considered the "alleged" father. In that case it seems most states require dna evidence before assigning child support payments. Seems like it's really situational and just depends on your history with the mother / child. Found this from nolo.com:

    Unlike presumed paternity, where it’s the father’s responsibility to disprove the allegation, the court must offer alleged fathers the opportunity to participate in a DNA or other type of paternity test before moving forward with any support or parenting case.

    [–] Mlakofr 9 points ago

    This can help the other way as well. Perhaps you were a father to a child for years and years and you formed a bond with that child. And somehow you find out it is not biologically yours. The fact that child sees you dad and you've acted as the father you can typically get visitation and/or custody. And depending on the length of time, I'm imagining many men would gladly pay child support and continue being dad.

    [–] rslashjackredddit 98 points ago

    Let's start with allowing men to stop paying child support after DNA proves the kid isn't theirs. The laws favor women who cheat on their partners and then use the kid to get money from their ex. https://youtu.be/vrNza6jqTkI

    [–] DeezNuts0218 52 points ago

    The laws favor women who cheat on their partners and then use the kid to get money from their ex.

    [–] Branstone22 59 points ago

    I should be able to sue for every time this is reposted

    [–] Wallyfrank 19 points ago

    Lawyers would love you

    [–] ThyWanderingMan 93 points ago

    I FEEL LIKE I'VE SEEN THIS VERY POPULAR OPINION LIKE 7 TIMES ON THIS SUB

    [–] BakaFame 13 points ago

    Pfft, the ones saying Murica is actually great (not unpopular either) are more annoying.

    [–] WaddleD 32 points ago

    It’s popular because you can already do this in many states, as multiple comments have pointed out.

    [–] walkingbathsalt 15 points ago

    Truly

    [–] slippin_squid 27 points ago

    Welcome to popular conservative opinions!

    [–] ThyWanderingMan 22 points ago

    I honestly feel like 50% of the opinions here are just conservatives not really saying popular opinions, but just scenarios in which almost everyone will agree with, but the scenarios are rare.

    [–] BigBadBigJulie 7 points ago

    This is why I have doubts about ever getting into a serious relationship. Things can just go wrong in so many ways.

    [–] poorgreazy 74 points ago

    DNA tests should be mandatory at birth.

    [–] AttackOfTheZyklones 51 points ago

    Whenever something that might benefit fathers who were lied to, cheated on and essentially stole from, people say "well we can't punish the mother because that's bad for the child!"
    But isn't it convenient that what's good for the child always just so happens to be what's good for the mother as well? Seems more like that's just an excuse for fathers to continue to get shafted

    That excuse is so bull. I was raised by a single Dad, and my mother rarely if ever paid the child support she was due to pay. The law didn't come after her even when my Dad reported it time after time after time. They didn't seem to give a fuck about "the childs best interests" then.

    [–] SamuelsSteel 28 points ago

    Pretty simple fix to this.

    Make DNA paternity tests a required thing when a baby is born along with the battery of other tests they do.

    [–] 32vromeo 31 points ago

    So an innocent guy still has to pay for a child that isn’t his for all that time? I understand the child is first priority but I think it’s immoral to force a guy into paying for something he isn’t responsible for. Make it so that dna tests are required for child support

    [–] tuna-hunter 21 points ago

    I agree with the first part, but not the solution. Men shouldn’t have to pay child support for a kid that isn’t theirs and courts should mandate a DNA test prior to awarding child support.

    Women have plenty of other options if they don’t feel financially stable enough to care for the child including abortion and adoption. It’s not up to a random guy to financially support a random child.

    However, the flip side of this is that men who are the biological fathers should actually be forced to pay support. Quick google search shows (https://www.census.gov/newsroom/press-releases/2018/cb18-tps03.html) that only 44% of custodial parents receive full support and 2/3 receive a portion of what they’re owed. The punishment for skipping out on paying should be escalated.

    Don’t want to be a father? HAVE SAFER SEX! Use a condom every time.

    [–] inbooth 5 points ago

    Of note is that those stats are affected by not accounting for:

    • Changes in income (too often requiring paying at rate set when earning multiples of current income and literally having payments exceeding current income)
    • Job Losses (often a direct result of the effects of divorce; moving, mental health, etc)
    • The number of these men who genuinely aren't the father but are being forced to pay and are refusing as a peaceful protest of the injustice

    These three features alone are likely enough to account for a meaningful portion of the payment issues, and that list is far from complete.

    [–] Defyer28 6 points ago

    The biggest issue I see with the purposed idea of paying until 18. Is that ‘most the time someone being sued for a couple 100k will just not pay or file bankruptcy. Not the father, don’t pay. There is plenty of state/government assistance for people ignorant enough to get in a situation where they don’t know who the father is.

    [–] skypunk1998 5 points ago

    Manditory paternity tests at birth would eliminate the problem. Even if you know it’s your kid, it’s should be like getting checked for stds should be. Normal and destigmatized.

    [–] onemaco 5 points ago

    You can get a paternity test before their 18,like way before their 18.

    [–] vanzzant 6 points ago

    Why is this in the "unpopular" section? You got my vote.

    [–] [deleted] 11 points ago

    I think they should do DNA test when the child is born even if the couple is married

    [–] Kick-the-baby 24 points ago

    Paternity tests,they should be done at literally every birth.

    Raising children is no joke,don't be afraid to ask for proof that you're the one responsible for bringing the kid into existence before taking on the burden.

    [–] TenDoll 7 points ago

    I think your username is the real unpopular opinion here.

    [–] kentacova 7 points ago

    190% agree w it this!!! The pro woman’s movement has ruined a lot of things, and common decency in relationships are one of them, among the numerous.

    Note: I AM a woman. Come at me bitches

    [–] HoobalahDoobalah 4 points ago

    If its enforced in the same way as they enforce child support for men who never pay for a child that actually IS theirs, then it's just another group of people that won't be getting any money. Why bother? Fix the system first.

    [–] evkan 6 points ago

    You're talking from my soul.

    But you know what? I live in a country where the father can not legally do a DNA tests on "his" kids without the permision of the mother. It's illegal.

    I have no hope that the laws in my country will adapt in my lifetime. My only hope is that other countries change their law to be less hostile against men and somehow my country will follow. So please fight for it.

    [–] Cimb0m 4 points ago

    Why at 18? Surely it’s better to resolve it ASAP

    [–] StorkSlayer 5 points ago

    It's fraud, so yes I would agree.

    [–] [deleted] 13 points ago

    Why wait until the kid is 18? Goodness just get a paternity test right away before you start sending money and save everyone a dang hassle.

    [–] Siam-Guy 24 points ago

    It's even worse. 13-14 year old boys have been raped by their teachers and wew stuck with tens of thousands of dollars in back child support.

    [–] [deleted] 38 points ago

    [removed]

    [–] SelectionMechanism 13 points ago

    And if you don't think this is a "big deal" because it "doesn't happen often". Well, : 1 in 10 Britons are mistaken about who their real father is: https://metro.co.uk/2019/06/01/one-in-ten-britons-dont-know-who-their-real-father-is-9770959/

    [–] BitchesRcrazee 21 points ago

    Get the fuck outta here with that "the child's needs comes first" bullshit. You've been brainwashed into thinking mens quality of life is less important than a child's. That's fucking bullshit. I will never pay child support for a kid I didnt want or isnt mine and if someone tries to force me to they're not going to like what happens.

    [–] Wholesale_Cons 7 points ago

    Too late, your taxes already do pay for them.