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    [–] stay back 100 meters or you will be shot CosmicPube 1 points ago in iamverybadass

    Big boi pew pew. Does he want to be seen or nah? Probably a mechanic.

    [–] Terry Crews is a national treasure CosmicPube 1 points ago in memes

    You gotta always protect the mcnuggets.

    [–] Terry Crews is a national treasure CosmicPube 20 points ago in memes

    Joke so dark my dad won't let me date it.

    [–] Devil, the Tempter CosmicPube 1 points ago in WTF

    No I didn't see it yesterday but I have seen it before and you can suck a fart.

    [–] Devil, the Tempter CosmicPube 1 points ago in WTF

    Tbf, I scanned the thread to make sure I wouldn't repeat the joke if it was already here. I apologise if it is.

    [–] Get after em ben CosmicPube 0 points ago in BlackPeopleTwitter

    Ted Cruz is taco flavored tofu with organic lettuce and tomato in a pita. It seems like it should be Hispanic but it tastes like boogers.

    [–] Get after em ben CosmicPube 8 points ago in BlackPeopleTwitter

    Ben Carson is a piece of shit. The political Steve Harvey.

    [–] The best motion capture boy! CosmicPube 2 points ago in aww

    Please tell me he was Lockjaw.

    [–] Sam Jackception CosmicPube 2 points ago in marvelstudios

    This motherfucker.

    [–] Umm, what the... so now we must do everything to extremes? We now must eat the entire box of donuts instead of just one?? CosmicPube 5 points ago in fatlogic

    God forbid you show a little fucking restraint in your life and make healthy decisions like, "I don't need that 8th piece of cheesecake for the fourth time this week." But nooooooo. "I can have all the garbage I want because it makes me happy. The fat is from genetics. I'm sexy this way. Society should change not me." Okayyyy how about fat free cheesecake so your heart doesn't explode? "That's fat phobic! HAES! Why can't I find clothes?? Why does my doctor push me to eat "right"? Fat isn't the enemy. Mah cOnDiTiOnS!"

    /Rant. Sorry.

    [–] Devil, the Tempter CosmicPube 0 points ago in WTF

    "Anything from the penis trolley?"

    "Do you have anything less penisy?"

    "Just giant penis, I'm afraid."

    [–] I did a thing! CosmicPube 3 points ago in crochet

    Im so fucking jealous. I've been trying Haku for 2 years and it keeps kicking my ass. Fine work, good madam.

    [–] What little known movie can everyone watch tonight that will have them dying of laughter? CosmicPube 4 points ago in AskReddit

    The scene where Kenny (I think that was the pilot's name) pulled out of dock and just slowly and painfully scraped the side of the ship all the way out. I was physically leaning and cringing along with the actors. 😆

    [–] This is the price you must pay to have an older brother CosmicPube 2 points ago in BlackPeopleTwitter

    Bullshit. My sister and I did it all the time. I was older, bigger and stronger, she was light and petite, 7 yrs my junior. GLOW was on the tv and we were going to be the next great tag team. The amount of feet-launches onto the couch were real life and she still has the scar on her forehead to prove it.

    [–] hmmm CosmicPube 2 points ago in hmmm

    Wait... I don't hate it but it's suspect.

    [–] AITA for not wanting to shave my genitals? CosmicPube 28 points ago in AmItheAsshole

    Tell him firmly, "This is the last time I'm going to address this. My doctor said no so no. Best I can do is a trim. Take it or leave it."