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    [–] How to get lazy parenting husband to help more? GetMotivatedNow 1 points ago in beyondthebump

    One of the best things I learned from this sub:

    If staying at home with the kids is a holiday and all fun, then working parent can spend time with the kids when not at work because, hey, it’s easy and a total holiday, right?

    If staying at home is work, then the stay at home parent gets a break from parenting just like the working parent gets to leave work.

    [–] 2 and 3 year old and mildly abusive husband... am I crazy? GetMotivatedNow 1 points ago in beyondthebump

    No “great dad” actively goads his children’s mother into trying to commit suicide. WTF.

    [–] My husband and I got a stern talking to from the woman in charge of my son's (1.5yr) daycare for leaving him there too long during the day. GetMotivatedNow 1 points ago in Parenting

    So, several thoughts reading your post:

    1) You're not a bad parent.

    2) My husband works part-time interstate. During those weeks, I do pick-up and drop-off for my toddler (2.5 years old). She gets dropped off at 7:15am and picked up between 5:30-6pm (even then, getting out of work is a struggle). The least amount of time she spends in daycare is 10 hours a day. She's coping just fine, but obviously prefers to be at home with me.

    3) Consider sitting down with the director to figure out what the problem actually is. If the director and the daycare are as good as you say they are, I wonder if something has been poorly communicated to you and perhaps your child is struggling with the hours or something?

    4) Regarding trying to make the situation easier or if YOU (not the daycare director) are genuinely worried that your child is spending too much time at daycare, could you do drop-offs because getting out on time is such a struggle/hassle with your husband doing pick-ups? Since his office does flex-time, maybe he could start work earlier and leave earlier? If he worked 7am-3pm, you could drop off your kid around 8am and husband could pick up by 3:30pm, meaning only 7.5 hours in daycare. Then again, if you don't want to do this, you shouldn't need to considering you're paying for your child to be there for 11 hours.

    [–] Crimes of Grindelwald: a few things that worked, and many things that didn't. [spoilers] GetMotivatedNow 2 points ago in FantasticBeasts

    For #15, it's set up in FB1 that bowtruckles can pick locks (Gnarlak the goblin mentions it in that bar the gang visits to find out the demiguise's location).

    [–] What did you have in 1999 but not 2018? GetMotivatedNow 1 points ago in AskReddit

    A plan for what I wanted to do with my life. I was so certain as a teenager.

    [–] 2 year old wants to dress herself GetMotivatedNow 4 points ago in toddlers

    Just wanted to jump in here and say that for my 2.5 year old daughter, the only things we maintain absolute control over are her health and safety. She needs to have her teeth brushed, take her medication, hold an adult's hand when crossing the road, be buckled into her car seat properly, etc. Everything else, she gets a choice. She's been dressing herself since before her second birthday. Our only requirements are that her clothes are clean, dry, and weather/activity-appropriate. 7 months on, she still loves dressing herself, carefully picking out her clothes and shoes and hair ties. It's really increased her self-confidence, it makes her happy, and there are a lot fewer tantrums. Sure, she'll sometimes go to daycare wearing a skirt layered over shorts layered over pants with a mismatched shirt and maybe a dress on top to complete the ensemble, but she LOVES IT and it's literally hurting no one.

    [–] Can we talk about tlThe Phantom Tollbooth for a minute? GetMotivatedNow 1 points ago in books

    I loved this book when I first read it at the age of 9, and still love it now! I reread it every year and I can’t wait to share it to my daughter!

    [–] I've finally accepted that I have a problem and need to fix it. I just don't know where to start. The weight-loss journey seems incredibly overwhelming and I have no idea what to do first. GetMotivatedNow 2 points ago in loseit

    You've already taken the first steps.

    1) Realize you need to lose weight and live a healthier lifestyle - Done.

    2) Find like-minded people (like those on /r/loseit) - Done.

    3) Ask them for help - Done.

    You've already come further than a LOT of people ever will. Moving forward from here, I'd recommend going slowly. Reflect back on what's worked for you. You know what's never worked for me? Lots of record keeping, weighing food, logging every single thing I eat, balancing macros, going to the gym every day. What has worked for me? Eating what I want but LESS of it. So that's what I did initially. I ate ~5-10% less compared to what I'd usually eat every time I ate/snacked. I either put less food on my plate or I left a small amount on my plate at the end of the meal and threw it away. As I started losing weight, my habits gradually changed to eating healthier, more filling foods, and eating less fast food. I started drinking more water. I started taking longer walks with my husband and dogs.

    Your path will be different. Right now (or ever), you don't need to plan your entire weight loss journey start to finish. That's too overwhelming. You just need a plan for how you'll handle your next meal or snack. What would you be happy and willing and capable of doing? What's sustainable?

    [–] I am so angry at my job right now GetMotivatedNow 8 points ago in loseit

    If it helps, you can think about how, over the course of next year, you'll end up saving that $600 (and likely more) anyway, just by improving your health, not paying as much for doctors' visits, medications, etc, not to mention (probably) less on grocery bills and dining out. And then the following year, you'll save all of this as well as the $600 from insurance.

    [–] Sleep when the baby sleeps GetMotivatedNow 3 points ago in beyondthebump

    I have a 2.5 year old. I slept ONCE when the baby slept. She was in a little bassinet on the couch about 5 or 6 weeks old and I fell asleep next to her on the couch, with my MIL watching over us to make sure we were safe.

    [–] Inheriting clutter GetMotivatedNow 9 points ago in declutter

    Maybe get an objective person to help out, at least initially, like a friend you trust to be sensitive but not overly sentimental. Also consider making a list of things you’d like to keep before starting to declutter. It might keep you more focused if you know ahead of time that you want to keep some jewellery, a certain craft project, all photos, and that gift you gave her (as an example).

    [–] I changed my baby's name GetMotivatedNow 4 points ago in beyondthebump

    It took us 4 weeks after our daughter was born to decide on a first name and another two weeks to decide on a middle name. We probably would have taken longer, but we needed a name to get a birth certificate to get a passport. To anyone being pressured to decide on a name quickly, forget those people and take the time you need. We literally had a list of potential names and trialled them each for a couple days at a time until one felt right.

    [–] I need advice on how to declutter a 4-bedroom house in two days GetMotivatedNow 2 points ago in declutter

    I'm based in Australia, so I'll need to see what sort of donation options are available here. I'll look into the dot stickers!

    [–] I need advice on how to declutter a 4-bedroom house in two days GetMotivatedNow 1 points ago in declutter

    I've been living in my current house for 8 months and have been in the garage twice. Both times were to get something from my husband's car. I could literally donate/trash everything in the garage (besides the car!) and not notice. In fact, I'm pretty sure there are bags of stuff in the garage labelled "for donation" that we moved from the last property because we just ran out of time to donate in our old city...

    I've got a plan for Christmas! When we pull out all the decorations and start decorating the tree, I'm going to have a garbage bag close by to get rid of broken or hated ornaments immediately, instead of leaving them forgotten at the bottom of the bag like I do every year. Christmas stuff (and books) are my weakness though.

    My husband and I make a pretty good team, so I'm hoping things will run fairly smoothly. The big thing we might have an issue with is that he'll want to try to sell something while I'll just want it out of the house (some of my clothes, for instance, which he still hasn't gotten around to selling). With those, I think we'll have to agree to put a time limit, so that we're not moving those things again.

    [–] I need advice on how to declutter a 4-bedroom house in two days GetMotivatedNow 1 points ago in declutter

    That's a really good idea! It's something I could easily chip away at over the next two weeks but will hopefully make the two days easier.

    [–] I need advice on how to declutter a 4-bedroom house in two days GetMotivatedNow 1 points ago in declutter

    We could probably drop off donations on the way to daycare. I haven't looked into donation places yet. The closer I get to these two days, the closer I want to go find a match and lighter! Honestly, why can't I just pack one suitcase per person to keep and get rid of everything else?!

    [–] Does anyone else feel bad that... GetMotivatedNow 4 points ago in beyondthebump

    Remember who's doing the looking. When my mom looks at photos of herself, she sees all the flaws, thinks of how old she looks, hates her hairstyle or her clothing, etc. When I look at photos of my mom, I see my mom. My daughter is only 2 years old, but she loves looking at photos of me. I think I look awful in most of them, but she's just excited to see a photo of her mom, and that won't change with age. To your kids, you'll always look extra special and those photos will be treasured simply because you're mom. They won't see the photos the way you or a stranger sees them.

    [–] I need advice on how to declutter a 4-bedroom house in two days GetMotivatedNow 4 points ago in declutter

    True. That's why I'd decided sorting papers were a waste of time over the two days. They take too much time for very little gain when it comes to space. It didn't occur to me to apply that logic to every other object though!

    [–] I need advice on how to declutter a 4-bedroom house in two days GetMotivatedNow 6 points ago in declutter

    strive for efficiency and try to avoid perfectionism

    This is motto I try to live by in life and fail at spectacularly! My husband will keep me on track though! He wants to spend as little time doing this as possible, so that should help.

    [–] I need advice on how to declutter a 4-bedroom house in two days GetMotivatedNow 1 points ago in declutter

    Unfortunately, I've done most of what I can do without my husband. There are a lot of things I'd like to just chuck out, like the TV and a couch, but I can't just make those decisions unilaterally! Those two days are the days my husband and I are both free to tackle what's left in the house (and for me to convince him to give up the TV that doesn't work properly). The things that I can still do on my own (my clothes, daughter's belongings, etc), I'm still chipping away at when I get a chance.

    [–] I need advice on how to declutter a 4-bedroom house in two days GetMotivatedNow 6 points ago in declutter

    The stuffies that my daughter likes are out in the living room, where she plays with them most days. The others, which take up about 1/8 of all of our available closet space, are the ones she's shown no interest in at the moment. I feel so guilty getting rid of them, though, because they were bought for her by her grandparents.

    I really thought the KonMari method wouldn't apply, but I'm starting to think that at my stage of decluttering (after having done this for a couple years now), maybe I need to go that route. I'm at the point where I'm holding onto things because I feel I "should". But you know what? I hate the TV. It's massive, it doesn't work properly, and we don't even use it!!!! Yet, every year, we move it. It's moved house 4 times. 4!!!

    Unrelated, but when I visited my dad a couple years ago, he'd just had to move house twice within a few months. I told him to just throw out all my stuff instead of moving it, but he moved it anyway. Why?! Anyway, so that I wouldn't put him through the hassle again, I decided to declutter my things when I visited. He had saved ALL of my university notes and assignments. I had graduated 10 years prior. Some of those notes were almost 14 years old. Everything went into the recycling and he got back a lot of storage space in his basement. It's absolutely nuts what parents will hold on to (and I'm saying that as a parent myself, holding onto random stuffed animals for my kid because "what if she wants to play with it one day?").

    [–] I need advice on how to declutter a 4-bedroom house in two days GetMotivatedNow 2 points ago in declutter

    Oh my goodness, I remember reading your saga in real time! Hard to believe so much time has passed since then. I don't know if I'll have time to work through your list over two days, but I'll use it when the move comes up. Thanks!

    [–] I need advice on how to declutter a 4-bedroom house in two days GetMotivatedNow 1 points ago in declutter

    I'd love to hire help, but unfortunately can't afford it. Cleaning isn't a big issue for me, though, just tidying. And with big items leaving the house, it should feel tidier anyway (I hope)!