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    I_stole_this_phone

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    [–] ELI5: What actually happens when we unintentionally start to drift off to sleep but our body suddenly "shocks" us awake? I_stole_this_phone 1 points ago in explainlikeimfive

    No, its leo giving me the kick because he knows i am on to his shenanigans. I know this because that beautiful man always visits my dreams trying to steal my secrets.

    [–] In order to reduce plastic packaging, a Thailand supermarket decides to wrap its produce in banana leaves I_stole_this_phone 1 points ago in UpliftingNews

    Most grocery stores in my area dont wrap any produce. Its just stacked neatly. Sorry i dont get how these leaves are gonna save the planet. Are they going to wrap my pizza hotpockets in banana leaves?

    [–] Lady letting her children play in the skatepark where people are waiting to skate I_stole_this_phone 3 points ago in trashy

    I've seen this before. She hates skateboarding and people who do it. She has no power to stop anyone so she is using her kids as leverage. She was dumped in highschool by a skater or her sister dated a skater and shes still jealous and bitter.

    [–] Stealing a homeless mans beloved pet I_stole_this_phone 17 points ago in trashy

    Also, they love to be tickled. I saw a video once of researchers recording very high frequencies from rats. They would tickle the rat and it would laugh, they would move their hand and the rat would chase the hand and laugh at more tickles. My rat loved sleeping with my foot in oversized fuzzy slippers.

    [–] 25 y/o goth with low self esteem. Oh and I love to dominate my fiancé I_stole_this_phone 1 points ago in RoastMe

    Dude goth ended in 2005. Now you have to identify as nonbinary bottom oral masseuse who identifies as semi-queer.

    [–] We did it lads I_stole_this_phone 23 points ago in Darkjokesresistance

    Yes its a joke. Its an april fools joke. Him and his friends dont come to reddit for entertainment, they come for trolling and taking over subs. I dont really understand why but its what they do. Everytime i find one of them is a mod for a sub i visit i unsub.

    [–] We did it lads I_stole_this_phone 5 points ago in Darkjokesresistance

    I dont know why anyone would ever go back. The one here saying lets go back are part of the joke. Why go back when we can stay here and bring more subscribers?

    [–] I wanna eat you, but this feels soooooo good. I_stole_this_phone 1 points ago in brushybrushy

    Is this to make the boots shiny or is this because she loves lazy reptiles?