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    PrettySureISharted

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    [–] I rescued 3 beautiful baby box turtles from my pool skimmer last night. PrettySureISharted 1 points ago in mildlyinteresting

    Yes. I'm skimming a 20,000 gallon pool with a fish wand from PetSmart.

    Imagine my surprise when I pulled up 3 baby turtles.

    [–] What are some funny ways to answer the phone? PrettySureISharted 1 points ago in AskReddit

    "IT'S...ABOUT...FUCKING...TIME!!!!! WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?!?!!?!"

    [–] This fast-food restaurant has its own door for kids PrettySureISharted 1 points ago in mildlyinteresting

    In the Atlanta area, Chick-Fil-a has restaurants called Dwarf House(s) which have these smaller doors (presumably for the dwarfs).

    [–] What's the stupidest way you've hurt yourself? PrettySureISharted 1 points ago in AskReddit

    Decided to hold on to the swim platform on the back of a ski boat. The driver started going faster and faster. I kept holding on, my body skipping across the lake. He started driving zig-zag patterns to try to throw me off. As he took the last turn, my hands released from the platform. At the same time, a ski was thrown from the back of the boat which was slingshot through the air, into the water, and directly into my jaw, just under my bottom lip.

    It split my skin open almost all the way to my gums but miraculously didn't break my jaw or my teeth.

    I'd say that was pretty stupid.

    [–] I rescued 3 beautiful baby box turtles from my pool skimmer last night. PrettySureISharted 2 points ago in mildlyinteresting

    Lol, the skimmer is on the side of the pool. I used the aquarium dip net to remove them from the skimmer to keep from hurting them.

    It's a human-sized pool.

    [–] I rescued 3 beautiful baby box turtles from my pool skimmer last night. PrettySureISharted 1 points ago in mildlyinteresting

    Yes. They had apparently fallen into the pool then got sucked into the skimmer. At least they all stuck together.

    [–] How to wipe butts PrettySureISharted 8 points ago in gifs

    If it bleeds, we can kill it.

    [–] I rescued 3 beautiful baby box turtles from my pool skimmer last night. PrettySureISharted 2 points ago in mildlyinteresting

    It's my pool and I found the turtles. Apart from the specific breed of turtle, I'm pretty sure I know what I was talking about.