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    Ris3nCybeR

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    [–] Lies Told Ris3nCybeR 1 points ago in OCPoetry

    This poem has potential, a few things to change would be the repetition of "lie" in the second and third stanza, this will turn the reader away. Because words don't carry as much meaning after they are used multiple times in a shorter poem.

    Instead of;

    Everyone lies, it's the sad truth but no one lies as you lied

    Try something more like;

    It's the sad truth that everyone lies, but no one lies like you.

    This could give the reader more of an understanding and still move the poem along.

    [–] More Ris3nCybeR 2 points ago in OCPoetry

    I really like this poem, it really struck me on a deep level. The imagery used throughout gave me a sense of exactly what was going on, and how a fight with someone you love goes,

    So you don't give over the wish,

    each part of you would fall off

    fall off and evaporate,

    dissipate in a destroying wind

    so that there would be nothing left to answer

    to a sounding of your name.

    This is really powerful, and captures the feeling perfectly. Keep up the good work!

    [–] Together Ris3nCybeR 1 points ago in OCPoetry

    Okay, i'm sorry

    [–] Together Ris3nCybeR 1 points ago in OCPoetry

    Thank you, I'll totally work on that

    [–] Together Ris3nCybeR 1 points ago in OCPoetry

    Thank you, it means a lot! :)

    [–] Maskulinity Ris3nCybeR 2 points ago in OCPoetry

    I like what this conveys, how being a man in today's society is like putting on a mask, it's short and very powerful, wonderful write!

    [–] You're missing from me.... Ris3nCybeR 2 points ago in OCPoetry

    I like it, although in your first line, you say stricking, I believe you mean striking, besides that it is really moving, and conveys the same kind of feelings heartbreak brings.

    [–] 🔥 A group of Narwhals in an Arctic cove 🔥 Ris3nCybeR 32 points ago in NatureIsFuckingLit

    Like an underwater unicorn, they have a kickass facial horn.

    [–] I wish Donald Trump becomes openly homosexual. Ris3nCybeR 2 points ago in TheMonkeysPaw

    Granted,

    Now that Trump is openly homosexual, the voters are scared to look homophobic and he serves two terms, and tries for a third.

    [–] Wasn't a bad sunset in Clare this evening Ris3nCybeR -2 points ago in ireland

    Does he do photoshoots? I need some prom pics done, I don't have much money, but he seems like the kind of guy to do it for the exposure.