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    [–] I love being gay, but I hate how flamboyant/feminine I am. Anyone else struggle with this? What_Is_EET 2 points ago in askgaybros

    I am one of those bisexual guys where outside of sex everyone would assume I'm straight until I am dating or having sex with a guy. This just gives a little background on me, I have traditional "manly" hobbies and wouldn't seem flamboyant to anyone.

    But I had this precious fwb who I absolutely would date if life circumstances were different. He is flamboyant as all hell. Super into musicals, high voice, the clothes, demeanor. But damn, he had this confidence that I loved and that I didnt have. He had this power and if we were in arelationship, he'd be the one in control. Most attractive guy I've been with. Hold your head high OP, many of us aren't judging. And some are jealous that you're rocking it

    [–] Do I have HOCD or I am just gay? What_Is_EET 1 points ago in askgaybros

    Its not easy! Seriously, it isnt. But yes, you are gay. My advice is to take active steps to advance it. Yiu dont have to waltz into a gay bathhouse, but therapy and some physical intimacy is a way to start.

    I di want to say that masculinity is NOT a thing to worry about. We are all men, who like men. A lot of gay guys decide they want to break other social norms and explore, but you do you. I like a lot of "manly" things ans have a deep voice, but not in everything. You are still just as much a man from being gay. Doesnt change who you are, it is who you've always been.

    [–] Do I have HOCD or I am just gay? What_Is_EET 1 points ago in askgaybros

    Here is some obvious truth we are all seeing, sorry If I'm sounding harsh.

    You are gay, and you have some internalized homophobia. It's common that gays who are just figuring things out rationalize it by saying, "I'm only gay in this particular circumstance " or "I just love the way a guy looks sexually but I dont actually want to kiss him". We have seen this a million times, its up to you to accept what you are.

    Straight people never talk like this, its gay people who cant accept themselves. My advice is to find an LGBT therapist and find a guy to cuddle with.

    [–] Old Grindr hook up harrassing me What_Is_EET 5 points ago in askgaybros

    This is why I have a general rule about hookups, not to blame you.

    I will send nudes, I will send myface, but never both at once.

    [–] I think someone is BI/BI-Curious but I don't want to offend him. What_Is_EET 1 points ago in askgaybros

    All you can do qithkut forcing it is be open and gay and let him come forward with it

    [–] Will I ever meet my boyfriend’s family? What_Is_EET 3 points ago in askgaybros

    If it's been a serious 2 years, one of 2 things is happening.

    Either he has mostly cut his family out of his life or he is not out and comfortable with himself

    [–] Gay friend made a move on me and I really don't know how to handle it. Looking for advice. What_Is_EET 2 points ago in askgaybros

    I would sit him down for a very serious conversation. Tell him you understand having feelings for someone who doesbt feel the same way back. But that what he did was seriously not ok, and that you lost some trust for him. If he blames his drinking for it, tell him he can no longer drink around you. But make it clear you will cut him off if he does it again.

    [–] I think I’ll remain forever alone, how do I accept this way of life? What_Is_EET 2 points ago in askgaybros

    It means not making excuses. You are young, and a large part of life is working on yourself. It isnt easy but dating only works when you can be happy and comfortable with yourself.

    Let me tell you what I do. I workout every day and write down everything i am planning to eat ahead of time. Every day i reach out to someone and talk to them, twice a week I will invite someone to do something. Every day I spend 15 min cleaning, and a couple hours doing a favorite hobby. You have to be someone proud of themselves to date. Actually have worthy things to bring to the table. And yeah , that shit takes effort. If you sit on your ass smoking weed and playing videogames all day every day complaining, that's on you.

    [–] How do you live with the fact that there are a lot of people who actively dislike you? What_Is_EET 1 points ago in askgaybros

    You can agree to be the peoples doormat and people will still complain you are lumpy. No matter what you do, whether it is your doing or not, people will be upset with you.

    Mr. Rogers had many enemies. Bob Ross enjoyed his landscape paintings, but a large section of the artist community outwardly didnt like him. In my line of work in public service, I cant make everyone happy either. You have to give up that idea that you can be everyone's hero.

    [–] I just realized I could let the shower warm up before stepping in What_Is_EET 22 points ago in CasualConversation

    That would probably work if you have a bathtub, but not for dedicated showers I think?

    [–] I just realized I could let the shower warm up before stepping in What_Is_EET 1888 points ago * (lasted edited 11 days ago) in CasualConversation

    I am seriously questioning everything i do right now. Maybe i drive the wrong way but no one corrected me? Or maybe I'm putting on clothes the wrong way. Hell I might have been shaving wrong this whole time

    [–] I just realized I could let the shower warm up before stepping in What_Is_EET 52 points ago in CasualConversation

    Stepping into the shower and turning it on, getting blasted with cold water before it warms up

    [–] I just realized I could let the shower warm up before stepping in What_Is_EET 5383 points ago in CasualConversation

    I started taking showers when I was 3 or 4, mom just had me figure it out! So I guess that's just how I always did it and never questioned it? It's not something anyone ever talks about, ans movies never show the wait time between turning on the shower and stepping in I want to blame this on that lol

    [–] I just realized I could let the shower warm up before stepping in What_Is_EET 254 points ago in CasualConversation

    For years I dreaded showers. It would take a few minutes to warm up and i was shivering and miserable the whole time. Now i think I'm going to look forward to them, the cold water was the worst part

    [–] Just had to say no to sex with a smelly/BO guy? What_Is_EET 3 points ago in askgaybros

    If the whole vibe is off, you just leave. If its possible they just came to the gym or something, start in the shower.

    [–] Have you been forced/stereotyped into a role? What_Is_EET 16 points ago in askgaybros

    I have muscle and a deep voice. Always expected to be a dom top lol

    [–] My (22 male) boyfriend's (22 male) affection makes me uncomfortable What_Is_EET 2 points ago in askgaybros

    Nothing rare about what you feel OP.

    I'm bi, having been in both straight and gay relationships. I do not like excessive public affection, and do not like pet names around others. I'm public I am more reserved and subtle. That might change in private, where we take off clothes and cuddle on the couch.

    Theres nothing wrong with hownyoubfeek, but there are also some guys who want to show you off to the world. nothing wrong with that either. Yiur boyfriend is worried that you not wanting PDA means you might not like him. You need to talk to him seriously about this.

    [–] first time using dildo What_Is_EET 7 points ago in askgaybros

    Want to emphasize, do NOT use silicone lube with a silicone dildo. Seriously. He has good advise. I'd recommend starting with water lube. With this kind you need to reapply a lot

    [–] Struggling with coming out What_Is_EET 1 points ago in askgaybros

    You very well could do that. It's not easy.

    [–] Struggling with coming out What_Is_EET 2 points ago in askgaybros

    Ok, a few things.

    First, your porn viewing habits coincide with your sexuality. If your go-to is gsy stuff for porn, you can probably conclude you are at least mostly gay.

    Second, many gay people start out with a single crush, but ultimately are gay in general.

    Third, you are right not to come out now with feelings for your crush. Especially since you do not know his sexuality, how he feels about you, and you need to give him an easy way to back out.

    Fourth, the consideration for coming out is safety and financial independance. If your parents would kick you out then you would not come out

    [–] What do you do when dating a rich guy? What_Is_EET 1 points ago in askgaybros

    You both dont have to contribute the same financially. You both contribute what you can, and out in effort. If he makes double your money, maybe you put 25 percent into a night out and put some effort cleaning the house. You arent taking advantage of him, he knows your financial situation and that you are contributing what you can. Very, very different things. Even having concerns about this shows you are a good person.

    [–] Trying monogamy with THAT Grindr guy What_Is_EET 4 points ago in askgaybros

    Youd be surprised how often the "hoe" on dating apps keeps a bunch of platonic friends and has a good relationship. His cheating chance probably is no higher than someone who is dating their first partner. I can see how its awkward for you and it is something to talk about with him.

    [–] My best friend’s (straight dude) wife is pissed at me for giving him a couple of cute Pump jocks for Christmas. What_Is_EET 6 points ago in askgaybros

    You got him something that is sexy with the intention of it being sexy. It might have been a good natured funny gift, and I can see why you thought it was a good gift. But I can see why she doesnt like it either.

    I would most certainly apologize and say that it was given with good intentions ans you had been watching too many gsy fashion shows.