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    [–] Students of Reddit, what was the weirdest thing that "The Weird Kid In The Class" did? cliffwich 1 points ago in AskReddit

    We had a kid who ejaculated under the desk in seventh grade. During class. He wasn’t really the weird kid, more like the scary kid from the terrible home who was a bully and a weirdo. Not sure where you are now, Faratunde, but that was whack.

    [–] Dads of reddit, what is your best advice/story from the delivery room for a new dad with baby due today? cliffwich 2 points ago in AskReddit

    When my first kid was born, I’d been told that their heads come out kinda squished and coneheady, but I was NOT AT ALL ready to see a baby with a head shaped like a 40-oz blast out of my wife. My daughter’s head looked like a straight-up torpedo, and the only reason I didn’t start freaking out was the doctors and the nurses were all playing things so totally cool. They slapped a hat on her, handed her to my wife and the grain silo was never discussed. Eight hours later, it looked totally normal.

    Moral of the story — no matter what the kid looks like when they hit the outside, don’t worry unless the doctors start worrying first.

    [–] What is the fate of Canada? cliffwich 2 points ago in AskReddit

    In 100 years, global warming will turn them into the wealthiest western economy, but it won’t be that relevant because everyone will be speaking Mandarin.

    [–] Samurai squad in the late 1800s cliffwich 14 points ago in OldSchoolCool

    “Don’t even think about it, I will murder you” - every face in this photograph

    [–] What is the fastest you've ever seen someone promoted due to extreme competence? cliffwich 2 points ago in AskReddit

    Saw a kid go from new hire analyst to CEO of a 7-person tech company in two years. He was/is hard-working, brilliant and very likable. Never questioned it.

    [–] YEEEET cliffwich 2 points ago in funny

    What is on the other side of that fence? Was it a basketball?

    [–] what are you willing to spend on an engagement ring? cliffwich 1 points ago in AskReddit

    None of the ethical issues, beautiful stones, save some money, it’s a real diamond... seems like the right move, no?

    [–] Michelle Pfeiffer, 1982. cliffwich 4 points ago in OldSchoolCool

    Scarface-era Michelle Pfeiffer was very, very hot.

    [–] Ankle before yeti penises fat cliffwich 3 points ago in Showerthoughts

    OP's post history is worth a scroll.

    [–] A challenger appears! cliffwich 1 points ago in JoeRogan

    Uh, I believe Larry Niven predates Halo.