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    [–] Fifty Shades of Sith darthbauerdragonzord 1 points ago in PrequelMemes

    I think Ani should be saying "Fuck me like you did with your eyes on Tatooine."

    [–] What's the best way to annoy a scammer by phone? darthbauerdragonzord 5 points ago in AskReddit

    I got one of those Microsoft service calls where the guy says they detected a virus. I went along for a bit. Told him I'd get the computer. Then "oh no its not starting, let me call the Dell service dept." Then put the phone on speaker next to me and started reading. Every so often I would say something about its "not working", "ill give that a try", "no still nothing" etc. Then after about 15 min or so, to the guys credit he hung in there, "I finally said okay that did it thanks." Then the guy started in again but before he could get going I said "yeah turns out it wasn't plugged in thanks for the help" and hung up.

    [–] I love how we can all tell who this is just by a mouth darthbauerdragonzord 3 points ago in PrequelMemes

    I think at this point you can post almost any part of an image ask who/what and there's probably like a 90% chance its Obi Wan.

    [–] The 92nd Infantry “Buffalo Soldiers” in Italy - 1945 darthbauerdragonzord 4 points ago in OldSchoolCool

    I believe he was also captured at one point and then escaped, writing a letter of apology and leaving it behind. I think this was during one of the Boer Wars.

    [–] Girl who used to be paralyzed surprises her nurse. darthbauerdragonzord 2 points ago in aww

    With how excited and enthusiastic that hug was I'm surprised she wasn't paralyzed again.

    [–] What was your best “You’re speaking to the manager right now” moment? darthbauerdragonzord 2 points ago in AskReddit

    Im a supervisor for security for local government buildings including welfare offices. Its close of business 430. Building locks and if you are not inside you have to come back the next day. This guy misses the multiple announcements and tries to go in ar 435. I know its only 5 minutes but the actual workers are strict about this. They want to go home too. Anyway guys flips out starts making threats and refuses to leave. I get called to come over and as I'm on the way I'm briefed. This guy is done its either he leaves on his own or we toss him. I try to start off polite but he immediately goes to insults and threats. So I tell him he's done and its time to go. He s says he's not leaving and to call the police. I tell him That's not how it works and he either leaves or I will assist him. He starts to say you can't touch me but before he finishes the word touch I grab him by the arm and shoulder and push him to the sidewalk were the property ends. He then demands to talk to the supervisor. Looking him right in the face I tell him that would be me. Well, I want to speak to your supervisor. I point to a tower about 1 mile away and tell him our office is located there but my boss leaves at 5pm, its now 455, so he better start walking. I then turn and head back to the building. He stands on the sidewalk for a couple minutes weighing his options before walking off.

    [–] What was the stupid reason you were bullied as a kid? darthbauerdragonzord 101 points ago in AskReddit

    Never was given a honest chance. I remember walking in and asked if I was fighting. I said no and before I could say what actually happened the v.principal says "well this boy says you were and you are both suspended" They called my dad and I was sent home. All my dad ever asked me was if I started it and since I didn't I basically had a three day weekend. Next time on saw the kid his hand was bandaged up.

    [–] What was the stupid reason you were bullied as a kid? darthbauerdragonzord 239 points ago in AskReddit

    I was once suspended for breaking a kids hand. I broke it with my head. I mean it broke when he punched me in the head when I asked for my football back. Nothing else. I got my ball and went to class. Then got called to the office to see the kid with an ice pack on his hand. Got suspended.

    [–] Woman sues ex-boyfriend after his long penis 'stretched her vagina' darthbauerdragonzord 23 points ago in nottheonion

    This woman has found a full proof strategy to winning lawsuits.

    Her: "His dick is big and I'm suing him for it"

    Judge: "His dick can't be THAT big"

    Him: "It is your honor, it is"

    Judge: "Um... plaintiff wins I guess"

    [–] When your sister sends you this... darthbauerdragonzord 1 points ago in funny

    According to the lore it was plageius who accidently caused Anakin. Plageius was manipulating the midichlorians and the force "struck back" and created Anakin.

    [–] When your sister sends you this... darthbauerdragonzord 1 points ago in funny

    Was it like he was conceived through the force? As if a part of some prophecy?

    [–] Stan Lee has passed away at 95 years old darthbauerdragonzord 18 points ago in AskReddit

    It was the characters that he helped create that gave me so much entertainment as a child and even now as an adult. Rest easy. Excelsior! True Believer