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    [–] An "answer" to why women choose certain guys to date. demonchefofportland 4 points ago in PeopleBeingJerks

    He tells himself this shit because he's probably a dirty neckbeard who looks like fuking Hoggle from the Labrynth.

    [–] The true power your virginity demonchefofportland 1 points ago in insanepeoplefacebook

    Homie, what are you talking about? How the fuck does virginity make your dick grow? Like... homie, what? Homie, no.

    [–] These are Sylvester Stallone's daughters. demonchefofportland 411 points ago in pics

    I want to imagine they sound exactly like him.

    "Ey you pops, whats the deal with breakfast, we don't got kale?"

    "Ey yo, you know we don't keep dat gawbage in'nis house".

    "Ey yo, but dad, we tryina' lose some weight here, its awlmost bikini season".

    "Ey yo, I'm makin' bacon. If you want breakfast, well das what you can have".

    [–] Fraternities and their toxic culture demonchefofportland 7 points ago in rant

    I 100% agree with you, I just want you to know that this sounds like

    "My ancestors are smiling upon me, Imperials. Can you say the same?"

    [–] Let me show you just how yoga-queen i can be demonchefofportland 1 points ago in gifs

    Gravity can make fools of the most graceful beings we have to offer.

    [–] Woman suffers seizure, wakes up to stranger sexually assaulting her at Ride On bus stop demonchefofportland 10 points ago in news

    "Disabled sex offenders who hate the government"

    And who the fuck cares about that? Oooh watch out, they hate the government. That rapist gimp with no hands, and no pecker. What a tragedy.

    [–] DiGiorno Pizza Fighting the Good Fight 🍍 demonchefofportland 2 points ago in KnightsOfPineapple

    This guy is a fucking moron. Thats nothing like pineapple.

    [–] Delicious! demonchefofportland 4 points ago in insanepeoplefacebook

    Thats mold my dude!

    [–] Sleep - Dragonaut [doom metal] demonchefofportland 1 points ago in Music

    Royal Thunder is fucking incredible, and it matters not that they are women. They are fucking mighty.

    [–] Sleep - Dragonaut [doom metal] demonchefofportland 1 points ago in Music

    And Kyuss. They were both so fucking essential in the advent of 90s stoner metal.