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    [–] [TX] Child support increase has non-custodial parent going ballistic and I am worried kdsuzy 2 points ago in legaladvice

    Agree. Judges are generally aware that people who have been generally fine with the custody arrangement for 14 years until it looks like they’re going to have to pay more for child support aren’t actually concerned about whatever bs reason they try to come up with for why the kid should suddenly live with them. Judges know how child support is calculated.

    [–] sexually harassment at work kdsuzy 4 points ago in legaladvice

    You can’t do much about the language, but any time she gropes/touches someone, you can call the police and report it as an assault.

    [–] [CO] My ex lied about vaccinating our immune compromised 8 year old daughter. She now has chicken pox and is in the hospital. I want my ex as far way from my daughter as possible. kdsuzy 516 points ago in legaladvice

    Get a lawyer. You don’t want to do this by yourself and risk making an error that will cause more difficulties in the long run. When bringing this back to court there are certain procedural and evidentiary rules that will dictate how and when you can show the court your evidence.

    Personally, I’d file a motion for contempt, ask that your ex be required to pay all medical expenses related to the chicken pox that aren’t covered by insurance, and that you be granted full authority to make medical decisions. Your ex has already proven that she will directly violate a court order when it comes to medical decisions.

    [–] XH using stranger (to me) to pick up child at exchange while he is working kdsuzy 2 points ago in legaladvice

    Court would definitely see this as a huge waste of time unless you have specific concerns about GF’s mom as a caregiver.

    Think of it like this: unless you have some reason to believe GF’s mom is unsafe, the more people caring for, loving, and providing for a child, the better. It sounds like your ex’s GF has been around for a while. You should encourage your daughter to have a relationship with the girlfriend’s family. Just about everybody has different skill sets and can usually offer something valuable to a child’s life. It will be much less stressful for your daughter if you can support her relationships with members of your ex’s support system. Even if you’re not explicitly saying negative things about your ex or his GF, kids can usually tell. It sucks to be pulled in opposite directions by the people you love. Let her enjoy the time she spends with her father and the people he loves instead of thinking she should be angry or upset out of loyalty to you.

    [–] [MN] A girl is planning to claim I am the father of her baby when we never had sex kdsuzy 29 points ago in legaladvice

    If you are in foster care as the result of a CHIPS matter, you have lots of people available to you. You have a social worker in charge of making decisions for your legal custodian (the county social services agency), a guardian ad Litem whose job it is to advocate for your best interests, and because you are over the age of 10, you should also have an attorney appointed to represent you. If you don’t know the names of any of those people, call court administration in the county you were living in before being placed in foster care. Tell them your name, that you believe you are the subject of a child protection case, and get the names and contact information for all three of them. Then start making phone calls.

    [–] Grandparent rights Upstate NY kdsuzy 87 points ago in legaladvice

    An order for protection does not require criminal charges. It’s a civil case. You should try contacting a family law attorney or a domestic abuse shelter and see if they can help you figure out the steps for requesting a restraining order.

    [–] (MO) My stepdaughter has decided to try and conceal her pregnancy during divorce. kdsuzy 14 points ago in legaladvice

    To add onto that, if she were to be found to have perjured herself, any testimony she gives in any type of court case in the future, she will be impeached with that perjury conviction. A judge or jury could still possibly believe her testimony, but they will be given the information that she’s been willing to lie under oath in the past, and they can use that information however they’d like.

    [–] I need some help kdsuzy 1 points ago in legaladvice

    Maybe, but a verbal contract CAN be enforced. It’s just more difficult to prove. And “successful season” is vague enough that it could go either way, depending on the judge. Filing in small claims court (aka conciliation court) in MN is super easy, can be almost completely filed online, and it’s only $75 to file, which OP could claim as part of the damages if the claim is successful. For $1500, it may be worth taking a shot at getting it back. Whether the time spent making the claim and going to court would be worth it is a completely individual decision.

    Saying nasty things about an employee, even if it vaguely refers to their medical condition, isn’t going to be relevant. It’s not a HIPAA violation since it’s not a medical or treatment provider. And it’s not against the law to be and a$$hole. OP, don’t even bring it up if you do take this to small claims court. It will just make you appear petty and vindictive.

    [–] Pregnant Ex-Girlfriend refuses to tell me if im the father. Giving baby up for adoption. Indiana kdsuzy 2 points ago in legaladvice

    Sign up for the putative father’s registry. Proceeding to finalize an adoption of a child without a legal father listed will require a search of the registry. When your name pops up, a paternity test will need to be completed to determine whether or not you are the biological father. If it’s determined that you are the biological father, you can still consent to the adoption.

    The only downside to doing this is that it would take longer for the adoption to be finalized because of time required to complete DNA testing. This would not prevent the baby being placed with the adoptive family beforehand if everyone agrees to do so. Remember, though, that if either biological parent changes his/her mind before the adoption is finalized, the other bio parent could be ordered to pay child support for the next 18+ years.

    [–] Sentancing kdsuzy 1 points ago in legaladvice

    I’m so sorry for your loss. It totally sucks losing a family member that way.

    I’m not familiar with NJ criminal law procedures, but this is how it works in my state:

    You would be allowed to make a “victim impact statement.” Our County prosecutor’s office has a victim/witness coordinator who would be available to meet with you if you have questions. Sometimes it’s a probation officer who contacts the victim’s family for input regarding their sentence recommendations.

    Sometimes a plea deal is for a specific length of time. Sometimes the deal just includes a maximum sentence but leaves the option open for the defendant to argue for a lesser sentence during the sentencing hearing. If it’s the former, then nothing you say will have an impact on the final sentence. If it’s the latter, then it still probably won’t, but could. In my State, it’s an appropriate time to tell the judge (you are speaking to the judge during this time, not to the defendant) about your father - what he was like, what you miss the most about no longer having him in your life, how you have been personally impacted by the defendant’s behavior, etc. I strongly recommend writing it out ahead of time. You can contact the prosecutor’s office and ask if they have someone you could ask questions about how it works, how long they expect it to last, all that stuff.

    [–] Will my girlfriend moving in with me negatively effect custody of her baby? kdsuzy 3 points ago in legaladvice

    I would recommend seeking child support anyway. It’s the child’s right to be supported by both parents. If your girlfriend doesn’t want to rely on support from her ex, that’s fine, and probably smart in this case. She doesn’t even have to enforce it if she doesn’t want to. But having that support order in place could be useful in the future, even if her ex never pays a dime. And if her ex does pay, she can just use the money to open up a savings account or even a 529 college savings plan for their son to use for college.

    [–] McDonald's dog left outside while owner eats breakfast kdsuzy 3 points ago in legaladvice

    -12 C isn’t necessarily that cold to a dog. My dog regularly chooses to be outside when it’s -15 C or colder. Not all day, but easily for an hour or two at a time. She lounges on snowbanks or ice patches like she’s at the beach. A lab can probably handle that temp for an hour without being in danger.

    [–] My friend died to a piece of faulty (tampered with by a manager) safety switch, police found a grinder in his car kdsuzy 4 points ago in legaladvice

    OSHA investigators are not lawyers. They are trained to spot safety violations and write citations based on what they observe. They aren’t trained to answer questions about how violations could affect a civil lawsuit. In fact, any OSHA inspector giving advice along those lines is much less credible than one who doesn’t answer that type of question.

    Source: Used to be a state OSHA investigator before going to law school. Was hired by the state OSHA department right out of undergrad. Was doing solo inspections within 2-3 months. Did that for three years before I decided I wanted to actually understand the law.

    [–] [Oregon]If a tenant has been doing meth on my property, do I lose my house by reporting them? kdsuzy 1 points ago in legaladvice

    Take a picture of what you discovered in the house. I’m assuming she didn’t have a lease so would be considered a month-to-month tenant. You’ll have to talk to an attorney about Oregon landlord/tenant laws and follow the legal procedures for eviction. I think there’s a good chance that illegal drug use is a statutory basis for ending a tenancy.

    [–] I thought I was moving into a smoke free building. It's definitely not. Can I break my lease? [MN] kdsuzy 6 points ago in legaladvice

    You can’t just decide to break your lease because you feel like the landlord isn’t holding up his/her/it’s end of the deal. What you can do is file a rent escrow action. Before you do so, you have to give the landlord written notice that you believe the landlord is not complying with the lease terms as specify how the landlord is violating the lease terms. The written notice can be personally delivered or mailed to the location where rent is delivered. Then, if the landlord doesn’t remedy the situation, you can file a rent escrow action. The instructions and forms are available on the MN State Courts website at Rent Escrow Instructions.

    If you’re in Hennepin County the rules are a little different, so look through the landlord/tenant section carefully.

    You’ll have to wait 14 days after giving the landlord written notice, and then you can file an affidavit of rent escrow and start the court case. The filing fee, IIRC is $295. If you can’t afford that, you can request a fee waiver (will depend on your income).You’ll file an affidavit of rent escrow explaining how the landlord is in violation of the lease terms, attach a copy of the written notice you provided to the landlord 14 days earlier, and a copy of the lease. Then you will pay any rent due to the landlord into the court instead of sending it to the landlord.

    You will get a date for a hearing, and after you and the landlord tell the judge what’s going on, the judge will decide whether the landlord’s failure to prevent others from smoking in your building is a violation of the lease, and if so, whether your rent should be reduced or if you should be released from the lease and allowed to move out with no penalty. The court’s order will either release the rent you paid into the court to you, to the landlord, or some to each of you.

    [–] Caught my husband cheating. What steps should I take so he doesn't try to take advantage of our situation. kdsuzy 4 points ago in legaladvice

    If custody issues are involved, you really really really should have an attorney. Often, especially when one spouse controls the majority of the finances, the attorney’s fees are included as part of the final divorce decree. Many family law attorneys will provide a free consultation- you can talk to them about your financial circumstances.

    [–] [DE] My brother threatened to kill me, swung a hammer at me, then changed the locks and demanded that we move out of his house. kdsuzy 22 points ago in legaladvice

    The legal advice already provided pretty much covers it. However, you also need to remember that your wife is pregnant. While some stress is fine, chronic stress can cause premature labor and/or low birth weight. I’ve had two preemies (not stress-related) and although they are both healthy kids and doing well now, I can tell you that it’s scary as hell to have a baby in the NICU, even when they’re doing well. Your parents have decided what part of this family is most important to them, and it’s not you or your wife. They can accuse you of “ruining the family” as much as they want. You don’t need to acknowledge them. You aren’t legally obligated to have contact with your brother or your parents. Your parents have decided that your safety, your wife’s safety, and their future grandchild’s safety is not a priority. My advice is to cut all communication with them. Just don’t respond. Get a restraining order against your brother. He’s already threatened you. Protect your wife. Show her that you’re protecting her. Show her that she and your baby are the most important members of your family. Even if she hasn’t said anything about it, she’s probably terrified that you might listen to your parents on this.

    Your parents have no legal rights to a future relationship with your child. You don’t need to send them a birth announcement. You don’t need to let them meet your baby. Your parents and your brother dug this familial hole for themselves. If they want to apologize and make amends sometime in the future (I personally wouldn’t even consider it until after your baby is born - once again: pregnancy + stress = unnecessary risk) it’s up to you whether to forgive and forget.

    [–] Ex Wife destroyed my credit kdsuzy 4 points ago in legaladvice

    Unless there’s something in the divorce decree ordering her to refinance in her name that you could enforce, you’ll have to file a civil action to force her to either refinance or sell the home. You’ll want the assistance of a real estate attorney. Property law can get tricky when dealing with mortgages and deeds. And, as you’ve discovered, failing to cover all your bases can have serious consequences.

    I’m pretty sure that what you’ll want is an order that requires her to refinance the house so the loan is in her name only, and when that happens, you will provide a quit claim deed that gives up all of your ownership rights to the property. You will want a deadline for her to complete the refinancing- it’s possible that she won’t qualify for financing on her own. If she’s unable to refinance by a certain date, say 60 days from the day the judge signs an order, the house will be sold. If it gets to that point, you will also want something in the order requiring her to fully cooperate with the sale, find a realtor you can both agree on, and follow the realtor’s recommendations regarding listing price, reasonable modifications to improve speed of sale, etc.

    You don’t want to leave her any more loopholes. She’s had 20 years to take care of this on her own and hasn’t done so.

    [–] I think I fucked up by giving my ex husband 50% physical and legal custody. kdsuzy 3 points ago in legaladvice

    1. File a motion to modify custody so it reflects what has actually been happening. When he moves back to the area, he can file his own motion to modify the visitation schedule.

    2. If you haven’t already, keep written documentation of when he has any contact with your daughter - phone, letters, or in person.

    Child support is based on the custody/visitation that is in the court order, not what is actually happening, which is why you want the order to reflect reality.

    Local attorneys will be the most helpful resource on the correct procedures to get this accomplished.

    [–] Father keeps threatening my mother (ex-wife) and my step-father kdsuzy 2 points ago in legaladvice

    In my state that would qualify as terroristic threats. You need to contact the police. It could be tricky because he’s in another state, but I have seen cases where a person has been charged even though they were in a different state because they were aware of the location of the victim. They were considered to be availing themselves of the jurisdiction of the victim’s state by contacting someone in that state.

    [–] Changed the terms of the contract kdsuzy 1 points ago in legaladvice

    If you have a contract, you’re not at-will. Are you saying that the contract you signed had a term of 3 months, but you didn’t read before signing? Or did the contract not have a term length in it? Need more info.

    [–] Worried my room ate X might stop paying her portion of rent kdsuzy 1 points ago in legaladvice

    You would be better off splitting the extra rent among the four of you until you can find a 5th roommate (so your landlord doesn’t file an eviction case against all of you for nonpayment of rent) and then going to small claims court to try and collect those rent payments from the one who moves out.