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    pheliam

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    [–] Saturday pheliam 2 points ago in modular

    Shoutout the trackball lookin like the eye of the storm.

    [–] Been following this sub for years. Finally got my first synth as an adult! pheliam 1 points ago in synthesizers

    Thanks, and welcome to the knob-wiggling fun-time crew.

    I read this tip on MuffWiggler months ago and figured I'd pay it forward. Dust creates scratchy knobs & faders! On a mixer with crackly GAIN knobs, it's... not fun.

    [–] Been following this sub for years. Finally got my first synth as an adult! pheliam 6 points ago in synthesizers

    PROTIP: Buy a paintbrush just for dusting your synth(s). Works wonders on pedals, mixers, and modular, too!

    [–] I just bought my first synthesizer pheliam 10 points ago in synthesizers

    Congrats! Be patient and learn it deeply- it WILL inspire you. I have the bigger brother Minilogue but the micro-tunings and more granular multi-track motion edits of the Monologue seem cool as shit.

    The world of synths and music gear is a deep money pit. It's intoxicating to keep buying, but it's less sexy to stick with it, really know the ins and outs of the device and how to add it into your workflow.

    Ok that's a long 2 cents. Have fun!

    [–] Dating site pic vs. real life pheliam 1 points ago in datingoverthirty

    LOL and I thought it would be Filter - Take my Picture for some reason.

    [–] Weekly Check-In - October 08, 2018 pheliam 2 points ago in datingoverthirty

    I'm very nervous about sharing it openly (it's not yet released), but I'll PM you!

    [–] Weekly Check-In - October 08, 2018 pheliam 3 points ago in datingoverthirty

    First gig ever went really well. I got an encore and a ton of praise from bar patrons and other musicians alike. Really good shot in the arm for my creative output! (I may have stolen the show from the headliner... oops.)

    Local music is a lot of fun, and really helps with the finishing process. I'm on various folks' lists now. Feels like the start of something good. Dating-wise, I'm all tumbleweeds but with music I can be myself and that's that natural swaguuuu.

    [–] Recycling first date spots? pheliam 6 points ago in datingoverthirty

    Sound advice. Did the pub staff give you any guff, or joke with you at all?

    [–] I [30/M] feel like I can't compete in this dating culture. I don't feel like a "real" man pheliam 2 points ago in datingoverthirty

    What you say about the goal is really hitting home with me, thanks.

    This helps me re-consider that I'm the one making dating exhausting for myself. It's not about trying to please everyone, but be real with myself about the 2 to 4 core needs I might have.

    [–] Weekend Thread! - October 05, 2018 pheliam 3 points ago in datingoverthirty

    Weekend without the kids. Kayaking Saturday morning, then playing my first gig on Sunday night! Excited, nervous, and dancing a lot! It's nice outside the comfort zone!

    [–] An upgrade happened, thank you for the advice! pheliam 1 points ago in battlestations

    Incredible. I thought it was Hyper Light Drifter gone realistic, for a hot second.

    [–] Phone Call after a month pheliam 6 points ago in datingoverthirty

    DISCLAIMER: I'm a dude, so-

    I think you should hear him out, but take it with a lot of salt. Do not call him if you're not ready to be skeptical about what used to be your normal, casual situation.

    It seems like you maybe want something more with him and you got out to protect against these feels dragging you into something potentially awful. From his perspective, I'm as salty as can be and will say that maybe his message is a booty call, or a booty check-in?

    [–] Weekend Thread! - September 21, 2018 pheliam 1 points ago in datingoverthirty

    Good thing: went on my first coffee date on Wednesday since starting OLD post-divorce. It went fairly ok, but I think she expected me to be a bit more... brazen? I wanted to talk but it was an open mic and our subjects kept getting derailed.

    Bad thing: no contact apart from an "I had a good time" minced pleasantry since the date, so yeah. Here's to living with myself and learning that I'm not everyone's cup of tea.

    [–] Weekend Thread! - September 21, 2018 pheliam 1 points ago in datingoverthirty

    Yay friends night and resisting OLD. Booooo seeing couples everywhere while single. I am running into that shit everywhere I go now, and it's hard not to notice. STAY STRONG!

    [–] How to come off more approachable/warm? pheliam 3 points ago in datingoverthirty

    I'm just starting to get dates and I wouldn't blame a woman one bit if she did that on a first date, considering that there's an iceberg of gross dudes they have to deal with all the time. Close hugs are intimate!

    My advice (as a late late bloomer) is to make people feel heard. Body language took me a while to figure out, but it's only because I was OVERTHINKING it. Some hand gestures during conversation, head nods, etc. Do you do any of this kind of stuff with friends you're comfortable with (as opposed to dates)?

    [–] You guys, I might have cried a little after finishing my run today...halfway there! This sub is daily motivation that I can do this. pheliam 5 points ago in C25K

    GET IT GURRRL, YOU ROCK. Keep it going, and listen to your body!

    (I hope you don't run into this same problem but just in case you are...)

    For me, whenever I ran with music on I ended up running too fast and getting winded. Figure out the pace that works for you (and it can change from run to run, depending on sleep, motivation, etc.).

    If you get winded while running (especially in those longer runs), slow it down to a pace where your breathing catches up with your legs.

    [–] First Hardware synth. pheliam 3 points ago in synthesizers

    Focus on getting a workflow going with everything you have now. I have a few thousand invested in modular and the recording workflow is the name of the game.

    [–] What are some things people say that make you unmatch them? pheliam 2 points ago in datingoverthirty

    I'd think it's fine if it's mentioned in passing, but if you belabor the point you're distracting from the whole GETTING TO KNOW YOU point of the first date.

    [–] What are some things people say that make you unmatch them? pheliam 19 points ago in datingoverthirty

    YUUUUP. 4 paragraphs of "I'm really fed up with this ocean of assholes washing ashore in my feeds let me rant about it!"

    That's a glass that's half empty. Halfer than half?

    [–] Which aspects of dating culture do you think needs to permanently retire and why? pheliam 3 points ago in AskWomen

    I think about this when I'm writing messages to women on OKC. It sounds ridiculously exhausting, but the mechanic favors women's physical safety, no?

    Often I think, "this is just another message on a pile of messages for this woman- it probably won't even stand out." Sometimes my brain wanders in the "people confuse drama for love" direction, but there's nothing good down that paranoid mental pathway.