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    sarcazm

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    [–] For the love of all things, someone please help me wean my 2 yr old from her beloved paci. sarcazm 1 points ago in Parenting

    My son was about to turn 3 when I decided it was time to get rid of the pacifier.

    I read a couple of books and internet articles to get some ideas, and I combined two of them.

    First, I told him, “In 5 days, no more paci.”

    “In 4 days, no more paci.” “In 3 days, no more paci.” “In 2 days, no more paci.” “In 1 day, no more paci.” “This is the last day for paci.”

    Then, we gathered up all his pacis and buried them in the backyard (he loved doing this). When we went to bed that night, he asked, “Where’s paci?” And I said, “Where is the paci?” And he thought about it, realized we had buried them, and then cried for about 15 minutes. Then he fell asleep.

    The next morning, I got up before he did, threw away all the pacis and replaced them with lollipops (like we had buried “seeds” and they “grew” lollipops).

    After that, he never asked for them again.

    Also, he had a lovey (a soft green blanket). That helped too.

    [–] Daughter, first period, and letting teacher know? sarcazm 1 points ago in Parenting

    The school my kids go to, the lockers are inside the classrooms.

    [–] Daughter, first period, and letting teacher know? sarcazm 1 points ago in Parenting

    Sometimes I hide tampons/small pads in my socks (if I don't have pockets or have small pockets). Less noticeable than a makeup bag/purse.

    Just throwing it out there as an idea.

    [–] Tom Holland’s recent post on Instagram with RDJ captioned “We did it Mr Stark !” sarcazm 7 points ago in marvelstudios

    I, personally, think he and Disney are purposely marketing him as a "marketing dufus" and they are all purposely saying specific things on specific dates about specific stuff. And it pushes it to the front of news outlets because it looks like he revealed stuff, when in reality that's exactly what Disney/MCU wanted.

    [–] Blursed Quiz sarcazm 3 points ago in mildlyinfuriating

    False.

    Black bears are best.

    [–] Blursed Quiz sarcazm 14 points ago in mildlyinfuriating

    "Guests," not customers. We welcome our guests.

    [–] Have you ever encountered true evil? How? sarcazm 2 points ago in AskReddit

    dude, I live in the DFW area and remember this being on the news.

    Sorry for your loss.

    [–] I had someone arrested today. sarcazm 2 points ago in offmychest

    I get how you're feeling weird about it.

    I was once part of a jury pool (about 60+ people) who were going to be chosen to jury a trial for a man's 3rd strike (specifically domestic abuse w/strangulation).

    The reason I emphasize 3rd strike is because I'm from Texas, and he was facing 25 yrs to life.

    Now, logically, most people might think that he deserves it. That if I'm put on that jury and he's guilty beyond any reasonable doubt, then he deserves 25 yrs to life.

    However, as the jury pool got smaller and smaller (they started dismissing people in groups every couple of hours), I started getting really nervous. Even though I thought he might deserve it, I could potentially send a guy to prison until he dies. I would basically forever ruin his life. I mean one could argue that he ruined his own life by being an abuser, but that feeling was still on my mind. I could be in charge of this guy's life. A guy I don't even know.

    I started getting really uncomfortable about it. In the end, I wasn't chosen. They were literally calling out names for the 12 jurors. And my heart was racing every time they said a name.

    So, like your story, logically, he deserves to get in trouble. Emotionally, it's weird/hard to think about and accept.

    Just know that 1. you did the right thing and 2. you feeling weird just means you're empathetic (which is not a bad thing).

    [–] Deadline misreported the "Disney-Sony Standoff" and secretly tried to update their original article sarcazm 8 points ago in movies

    Disney offered more financing for a bigger slice. It's not unreasonable. It's not like they asked for 50% for nothing in return.

    To me, it's like hiring me and paying me 5% of the company's gross plus rights to merchandising. Then, after it seems to be going well, I go to my boss and say that I would like to invest 50% into XYZ if I also get 50% of the profits. Is that not reasonable?

    Aside from that, my boss can say that 50% isn't doable but maybe 25% is. I mean, that's what negotiations are all about. Everybody just thinks Disney is being greedy because they're already a multi-billion dollar company. Whatever. It's just business.

    [–] Redditors, what is your shit happens academic story? sarcazm 1 points ago in AskReddit

    Well, I mean, my son still gets grades for his performance in general. And that reflects with his report card.

    I'm just saying that in addition to that, they also have metrics to determine if students' abilities are improving or remaining the same over time.

    [–] Redditors, what is your shit happens academic story? sarcazm 1 points ago in AskReddit

    This is only a good metric if each student gets an individualized lesson plan,

    Well, what's nice about computer-generated lesson plans is that a teacher can put students in front a computer to do math problems (or insert subject here) and the computer can automatically adjust the problems/questions as the student answers the questions correctly or incorrectly. For students answering incorrectly, the computer then generates easier questions and adjusts the lesson for easier understanding. For students answering correctly, it can generate more complicated questions and adjust the lesson to address more abstract topics.

    So while Barry is learning "A" sounds like "A," perhaps Adam is learning words like "Cat" and "Dog.

    edit: also, it is important for teachers to notice if there is improvement regardless of where they started. This can indicate learning disabilities early on.

    [–] Redditors, what is your shit happens academic story? sarcazm 1 points ago in AskReddit

    I'm not saying students can't improve during college. I'm sure they can. The ability to adjust is important, but workplaces are going to hire the most competent employee, not the one who can adjust from a C employee to a B employee. They want the A employee whether they were an A a year ago or a C doesn't matter.

    Like if I had an "A" employee and a "C" employee. And I gave them goals to work on so they could get a raise next year. Would it be fair to give the "C" employee a bigger raise because he went from "C" to "B" while the "A" remained an "A"? Even though "A" exceeded every expectation (as per usual)?

    [–] Redditors, what is your shit happens academic story? sarcazm 3 points ago in AskReddit

    That's crazy to hear they would do that.

    And one of the dept counselors should have been aware of that before you got close to graduating.

    When I was in my last couple of semesters, the dept counselor set up a meeting with me to discuss which classes I needed to graduate. They are supposed to do this with every student to ensure there aren't problems like the one you described.

    Like the dumb Kinesiology credit my then-boyfriend (now-husband) needed. They required the kinesiology credit to be Pass/Fail and not an actual grade. So, even though he had made an A (or B or whatever) in the class, they wouldn't let that class count because it wasn't specifically Pass/Fail (edit: which my bf had to specifically change to pass/fail by a certain date -- which didn't happen).

    My boyfriend just took it in stride and took another kinesiology class over the summer. My dad told me that if I had that happen to me, he'd be making some phone calls, because that's bullshit.

    [–] Redditors, what is your shit happens academic story? sarcazm 51 points ago in AskReddit

    This is interesting to me because my kids are currently in 5th grade and kindergarten.

    I've been to many Parent/Teacher conferences for my 5th grader. Not because he's a bad student but because the teachers ask for a conference 1-2 times a year (regardless of performance).

    They always have great things to say and my son has always made straight A's. But one of the metrics they use to measure performance is how much they've improved from the beginning of the year to current day.

    So, I guess at the beginning of the year, they take a couple of computer-generated tests that gauge where they are on math and reading.

    Then, after a few months, they take the tests again. And basically they want to see those abilities increasing over time.

    So, the teacher will emphasize that they like to look at these metrics more than their actual grades because it means they are increasing their abilities.

    So, I guess in a way it makes sense, but I think by college those metrics start leveling out. So, I think I'd be pretty upset if my "great" paper was a B while Stacy's "okay" paper was an A just because Stacy's last paper was slightly worse than this one. Or even worse, just because the expectations are different.

    [–] Garbage trucks are capable of updating Google maps every week, as long as they have the right camera equipment mounted on them sarcazm 1 points ago in Showerthoughts

    Maybe. We have alleys in our neighborhood (where we put out our trash). So, the photos would be of the alleys instead of the front of the house. Probably true for a lot of businesses too. Some small business parks share a big trash container.

    edit: maybe USPS, UPS, Fedex would be better contenders.

    [–] Weekly Discussion: Sony and Disney Fallout - Future of Spider-Man in MCU sarcazm 52 points ago in marvelstudios

    For me, nothing is set in stone. There will be time for negotiations.

    Disney wanted a new 50/50 contract and Sony declined. Funny how no source(s) have mentioned what Sony’s specific response was to the 50/50 contract. Did they offer anything other than the current 5%?

    Maybe Sony was caught off-guard and wants some time to confer with lawyers and other specialists before offering a deal.

    Disney has most of the cards, and Sony has one trump card. Disney has built the Marvel Universe. I can’t see Sony doing anything remotely similar.

    Some people think Disney is being greedy, and some people hate Sony for pulling Spider-Man out. But the truth is, both sides can compromise. Disney started with a 50/50 offer, but that’s just the starting offer. Maybe their goal was something more like 20-25% after negotiations.

    It’s been one day, and contracts can take weeks for parties to agree.

    I’m sure Kevin wants some credit for the work he puts in. Who doesn’t? Sony claims that Feige doesn’t have the time, but I’m willing to bet he just doesn’t want to put in the effort when he gets no credit (and probably wants more money). I mean this could be you or me put on a project at work where we see nothing in return. Whereas, I could be putting more of my time into projects where I see direct returns.

    Jeremy Renner’s tweet got me thinking too. How many of these Marvel actors are loyal to the MCU? Would they turn down roles Sony offers (for other movies aside from Superhero movies)? That’s more cards to add to Disney’s deck.

    In conclusion, the negotations have just begun. Next month, Reddit will have the headline that Disney and Sony reached a compromise.

    [–] Disney-Sony Standoff Ends Marvel Studios & Kevin Feige’s Involvement In ‘Spider-Man’ sarcazm 1 points ago in marvelstudios

    Eh. The article talks about how Sony doesn't want to go 50/50. I mean this could just be the beginning of the negotiations.

    They'll figure something out. Just like Directv figures something out every time they have to block out CBS when they can't agree on a contract.

    [–] And... I... can do this... All Day! | https://www.instagram.com/p/B1Y2b73ohUb/ sarcazm 1 points ago in marvelstudios

    I wonder if there was an alternate ending where this happened.

    After all, Tony gave him that nano-tech arc reactor back when he was having a mental breakdown.

    [–] AITA for 'hiding' $35k from my boyfriend? sarcazm 1 points ago in AmItheAsshole

    NTA for sure.

    Like you said, just because you CAN afford something doesn't mean you should spend your money on it.

    My husband and I have enough money to do stuff like vacations and such, but we specifically save $XYZ money for vacations. And I plan vacations at least a year in advance (so I have an idea of how much I need to save).

    This year, we used our vacation money to visit my husband's family in another state. This means we spent money on 4 plane tickets, hotel/Airbnb, food, etc. It's a lot in the end. Then, while we were there, his aunt and uncle were talking about having a "90th birthday party" for grandpa. And they were weighing in on what dates we could come next year. Like no big deal throwing down $$$ on another trip to Nowhere, Minnesota. They were looking into March dates, so I just said that the kids are in school as an excuse.

    I mean, if I would have known that they were planning a big birthday to-do next year, I wouldn't have gone this year. I don't want to spend my vacation money on Nowhere, Minnesota every frickin' year. That and I don't really feel like it's worth the money. If I'm going to spend that amount of money on a vacation, I'd rather go somewhere fun.

    Plus both his uncles promised us a place to stay during our time there and both reneged. So, we had to dump extra money into hotels and Airbnbs. So, excuse me if I don't want to go out of my way to visit when they won't do the same.

    But enough of my rant. The point is that while we can afford multiple vacations a year, it doesn't make financial sense to do so. I'd rather save the extra money for retirement or college or a new car or whatever. People who don't have savings like that don't think like that. There's a reason why you have $35K. It's because you don't throw it at random vacations, cars, or other expenses.

    [–] Me (30M) and my boyfriend (32M) can't stop fighting about our dog. All other areas of our relationship are amazing. sarcazm 30 points ago in relationships

    I see.

    Sometimes it bothers me when my cat licks himself (because somehow it's so frickin loud).

    I have trained him to stop and/or walk away with a soft sound ("psssst"). It doesn't hurt him and he understands because I've been doing it for years.

    Maybe he can encourage the dog with positive attention when he likes what the dog is doing. Soon the dog will associate X action with positive actions (pets and "good boys"). And maybe a soft "pssst" when he does something "annoying."

    But you can't stop a dog from yawning or stretching. I mean, that's so odd that that annoys him.