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    throwinitallawai

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    [–] Wisconsin high school drains half court shot at the buzzer! throwinitallawai 393 points ago in sports

    I love the "go fast, Claire," and then (camera bouncing) "YAAAAAAHHH"!

    Wonder if that's her dad. He sounds like it in the "yeah!" ;)

    Sound added to it ;)

    [–] Rant: I'm your doctor, please stop. throwinitallawai 43 points ago in TwoXChromosomes

    Well, and the real issue of being fairly new in her office, she's likely an employee, and she may have to tread carefully and work with management on this.

    If it's a multi-dr practice, she may at least be able to decline to see some individuals personally, but it may be tricky if management won't outright decline to see the other at all as to how obvious she can be.

    Not ideal; it would be great to be able to just remove the problem, but staying employed and dealing with medical ethics can make this practically difficult to handle ideally from her perspective.

    This kind of stuff really sucks to deal with.

    Sorry, OP. At least you got to get it off your chest. I have less of this personally to deal with in my profession since I'm a vet so I'm not as close-and-personal with my actual clients, and plus we're now a female-dominated field. But it is really uncomfortable when it happens.

    I have some clients I just won't be alone with in exam rooms, and is something I don't miss from the days I did emergency or farm calls back when I also saw large animals. I also 100% do not have a social media presence/ use my phone for clients/ etc. Just no.

    They can contact through the clinic or not at all, and I handle those when Im in the clinic.

    [–] It's the little things in life throwinitallawai 1 points ago in funny

    If you want to be part of a community of like-minded individuals, there are entire neighborhoods in E and S Austin that are right up your alley.

    If you want to keep that "unique" factor though, don't move here. (Or move 30 min outside the city into one of the Red counties).

    [–] I'm leaving my abusive husband throwinitallawai 1 points ago in TwoXChromosomes

    I am so sorry, OP.

    I was in a different situation, not an abusive one, but the man I loved and counted as my best friend for 25 years and my partner for 21 of those aburuptly left me for someone else after a 2 month affair and I had no idea it was coming.

    I know 100% what you mean about the source of your comfort now being the source of your pain and having your best friend suddenly not there, due to things he did. Sometimes I think it would have been easier if he died; I wouldn't have to face the fact that this loving man that I saw myself growing old(er; I'm already old) with was now Jekyll and Hyde and had hurt me more than anything in my whole life.

    I'm still really early in this process, it was less than 6 months ago, but I will say I've reconnected with people, even by phone, that I've not talked to in a long time, and they've stepped up. Lending an ear, giving support, giving me someone to talk to through the worst moments 'til I can be exhausted and get pulled through to the next moment. Right now, your world is almost all about getting through the next moment. Plan as you can, but at times you may not be able to see past that next breath or that next footstep. Make yourself eat. Try to sleep.

    Think about friends or family, any of your online or social media community (though take the advice of those who know more about that as far as ways to keep yourself safe in those environments, esp. if you share friends or he knows your accounts/ passwords). My family stepped up way more than I thought, especially my mom. Also look for survivor support groups in your area. That will be a huge positive resource for you. They'll have local practical resources to help you back on your feet, and there will be others further along the healing process to show you what's ahead for your healing.

    This really is awful, and you will probably want to fixate on and grieve the happy times and the best version of him, I know that has been the hardest for me. In my case, his rationalization ended up involving things that made me hyper-critical of my role in him leaving.

    But I didn't deserve to be left the way I was, and you didn't deserve to be mistreated how you were. And those things can only come from the other person. Don't let your fear for what's ahead turn into guilt or softening the memory of what he did that was finally to the point you had to go.

    And FWIW, obviously this community can at the very least give you people to talk to, who have been there or have expertise in this, or even just really care about another soul who's hurting and want to help.

    I'm so sorry you have to go through this. Never forget you did not deserve this, and that it will get better. I'm still in the midst of this, but in small ways I do admit, it has gotten better. For me, not yet so much the pain, but my ability to deal with it, and get on with my life.

    [–] I'm leaving my abusive husband throwinitallawai 1 points ago in TwoXChromosomes

    If you mean her username, that and the little microphone icon show that she was the "OP," or "Original Poster," which help identify that she made the actual post.

    It helps people follow along and more easily see when the person who made the post (the main entry we all clicked on at the top) then comes down and replies to people in the comments. Not all Posters do that. For Commenters, like you and me, who want to see what the OP might respond to questions, or clarify or give updates, it makes it easier to find those comments.

    I'm not sure if it looks that way on all sub styles and all Reddit viewers, though.

    Sorry you're getting downvotes; it's an understandable question. I think it's just jarring because of the really sensitive topic here.

    Hope that helps! (You'll also see that writer as "HTH".) Cheers!

    [–] The vet is SO scary!! throwinitallawai 53 points ago in aww

    Actually, I'm a bit more worried about bottom dude* - got that wider-eyed "triangulation" look, like he's judging distances.

    Source: see freaked out cats often, am vet, still have all fingers.

    *I'm profiling by saying "dude," but most orange tabbies are male, since it's a sex-linked trait. Although, locally, we have an anomalously big population of these who are females

    [–] The vet is SO scary!! throwinitallawai 13 points ago in aww

    But for real though-

    Bring them in separate carriers.
    The "shit rolls downhill when I'm freaking out" principle is a big deal for cats.
    Had several clients leave with a kitty cluster only to return in short order for me to have to tend to a scratched eye or torn claw or bleeding wound.

    Source: am/is/are/was/were/be/being/been vet

    [–] Hey Reddit, what's the strangest coincidence you've ever personally experienced? throwinitallawai -6 points ago in AskReddit

    That's about the least appetizing thing I could think of, that most people would likely still think of as "endearing."

    I do not want to see a grainy representation of someone's penis-implanted parasite when I'm grabbing a free doughnut.

    Just no.

    [–] 2015 Tianjin Explosions, which China tried to censor throwinitallawai 3 points ago in videos

    Yup. Totally redesigned the town of West here in TX. Though the main kolache place along the highway was unharmed.

    [–] What is a sensation that you can't stand, even though it's not painful ? throwinitallawai 2 points ago in AskReddit

    UGH! And it's clammy cold by then.
    And there's a sad flat sheen of undead zombie bubbles on the surface...

    shudder too real! Ick!

    [–] What part of being an adult were you absolutely not prepared for? throwinitallawai 7 points ago in AskReddit

    Find a way to combat that for yourself.

    Just emerging after several progressive years of this, accelerated by work responsibilities.

    Lost a lot of time and happiness to this phenomenon.

    [–] LPT: Don’t hide the things that make you unique. If you smile a certain way or have any thing about you that is not normal, be confident with it. People will find it cute or attractive because it makes you special. throwinitallawai 1 points ago in LifeProTips

    I'm so sorry. It doesn't matter how long, really; anytime you have that deep, trusting connection, getting suddenly jilted is as bad a grief as you can experience. Certainly the worst I have ever had.

    Sure, they're not dead, that would be awful, and a whole other type of grief, but that they actually chose to leave, it wasn't just chance, and so hurtfully....
    I was initially dumped with a letter. After 21 years together. For a 2 month fling behind my back. He was living with her in a month after this, the whole intervening time was him trying to "decide if he could face giving up his one chance" with the new person, as I jumped through hoop after hoop to try to address grievances he'd only just found the words to address but that he'd been dealing with for "a long time" that he'd "sent me signals about."

    Fuck you, dude. You decided to run away and dive into something new than to cherish and work on something that had shown itself worthwhile time and time again.

    Weed's apparently a helluva drug to let you escape your problems, and any self-reflection. At least, that's I think part of his personal transformation to Garbage Person.

    [–] LPT: Don’t hide the things that make you unique. If you smile a certain way or have any thing about you that is not normal, be confident with it. People will find it cute or attractive because it makes you special. throwinitallawai 2 points ago in LifeProTips

    Exactly. They make a decision that they're done, and then hang the whole weight of it all on something that has a kernel of truth. Lay it at your feet. Make it "your fault."

    Mine has since acknowledged this is what he did. But god damn did it make the hurt so much worse that he did it that way.

    [–] Which misconception would you like to debunk? throwinitallawai 1 points ago in AskReddit

    I wish I'd known/ believed in this before things were direly wrong. I wasted time and am starting from a much worse place.
    I'm trying to find happiness on hard mode. I'm doing it, but damn do I think this could have been easier.

    [–] Outlawing late term abortion seemed like such a reasonable idea until I needed one myself. "My little daughter would likely never walk, talk, swallow, or support the weight of her head. She would require brain surgery to extend her life, but no surgery could ever cure her." throwinitallawai 1 points ago in TwoXChromosomes

    I recently heard an interview on NPR with a very bright lady who is a lecturer at a university who teaches religious studies, and her husband (now passed) was a well-known physicist (I forget the names but recall the descriptors). They had a child with severe medical challenges from a birth defect. He made it a few years, longer than anyone expected, but ultimately succumbed to his dysfunction.

    One thing that strongly resonated with me (about something unrelated that I was experiencing) was how guilty she felt, even knowing it didn't logically make sense.

    Her revelation was that she was holding on to the guilt so much because at least, even though it was horrible and damaging, it gave her a feeling of control over the situation. It was a way for her to feel like she could prevent herself from feeling this hurt again.

    Identifying that in my own situation has helped me work with those feelings when they pop up. I've found healing from a loss is very much not linear, and seeing what it is my brain's trying to accomplish by having negative thoughts can be helpful in quieting them.

    I hope she and you are doing better, and I'm so sorry for your loss.

    [–] What dire warning from your parents turned out to be bullshit? throwinitallawai 2 points ago in AskReddit

    Re: not wanting to pay for experiences- I've realized I'm the opposite as I've gotten older.

    "Things," I have plenty of.

    [–] What’s the dumbest shit someone ever said? throwinitallawai 1 points ago in AskReddit

    Military leadership has a long time as they rise through the ranks to get used to dead-panning when someone above them / and-or a politician says something stupid.

    [–] He isn't wrong. throwinitallawai 1 points ago in funny

    Yeah I initially was stunned at Luke's arc in TLJ, but as the movie went on and I thought about it, I really liked it. No, it wasn't consistent with a mythologized Luke, but it was very consistent, IMO, with a "real" Luke.

    Dude always had a complicated relationship with the Dark Side, and in his putting too much personal connection in his relationship with Kylo, he held on too long and made some poor choices.

    Then, he couldn't face the consequences. It was a huge blow, being a legendary savior, to fall that hard, and not be able to help Kylo beat the pull of the Dark Side.

    Side note: I love that throughout, Leia just trudges through and keeps the Resistance going. All the men in her life keep running away from shit. She's dealing with the same tragedies. But she gets up every day and wades. the. fuck. IN.